Beauty for Ashes

I have a 15 year old son. If in 3 years, as a high school senior, he struck up a relationship with a 35 year old, which is what ages match the situation, I dont know about the rest of you, but I would be reading her the riot act. I can somehow visualise late 20s (with difficulty) but a man child? Its child abuse as far as I am concerned and bordering on predatory. What normal 35 year old woman has anything to share with an 18 year old? I would be trying to ask his mom about what college he was going to or trying to be an older sister or a mom to him. My living youngest is 6 and I have a teen and I would be comepletely pissed and flipping out if some older woman put her fangs into him. Thats really gross and says alot about the petitioner as far as I am concerned. As a mom of a teen, it really hits home. When are we as women supposed to act motherly and mature? What age is too young? Does someone 35 really have anything at all to say to an 18 year old except...wheres your backpack and what will you major in at school?

And anyone that tells you that a religious muslim family will be ok with a woman the mans mothers age marrying their virginal son is lying to you. Its weird here in the usa to have that big of a difference even between Americans. Unless of course you are Linda Hogan and this is a reality show.
Its your life and you need to live it as you see fit but hes way too young and in 5 years when you are in your 40s and hes not even mid 20s, you will regret the hell out of this

I have found mascara always works...and American perfume and make up
Morocco and Algeria and Egypt have their JERRY SPRINGER families just like the USA does. If I took you to dinner with my mother and father and they praised Morocco up and down it would be a different story than if I drove you through a trailer park in Narcoosee and you got to listen to an hour long speech about them fereners coming over here and taking our jobs and you got to meet the ex wife of the mans sister who is now the mans new wife and hes cheating on her with their cousin. Everyone has value in this life and calling people trash is unkind . But I have met my share of drama queens and and weirdos in the mena population just like in the American population.
We have to just accept and be patient with each other

Here are a couple of quotes from Ahmed Redhab from the Chicago Tribune
When extremist religious discourse at Mosques (and in Coptic circles) is regularly and unequivocally condemned and countered with a proactive and effective discourse of respectful coexistence, it will be a brighter day.
When Egyptians no longer have to list their faith affiliation on their official government ID’s, it will be a brighter day.
When Copts no longer need a special government decree to build churches (or fix bathrooms in their churches), it will be a brighter day.
When I see talented young Coptic men playing on the Egyptian football national team at a rate proportional to the Coptic talent in my 6th grade class in Cairo, it will be a brighter day.
When the glass ceiling barring Copts from reaching the highest levels of government is shattered, it will be a brighter day.
When Egyptian law, prosecutors, officers, and judges treat Muslims and Copts as merely Egyptians – that is as equal citizens – with merit being the only qualifier, it will be a brighter day.
Alot of Americans dont know the horrible discriminations copts face everyday in Egypt
Thank you for the dialog

That is for sure. I was horribly abused by my immigrant spouse, both emotionally and physically and the last thing I thought of doing was pulling his papers... It was more what can I do to make him happy because its got to be my fault. Incidentally women from his culture saw him battering me and his mother knew he did it too and he did it in front of different family members and no one condemned him for it. We had a tragedy happpen to us early in his time here so I felt like if I was better to him or tried harder,, I needed to forgive him, he didnt understand etc...
He has threatened to call the police on me, claim fake abuse, he has recorded me and he has threatened to take my belongings. I am the US citizen. I am struggling to get out of the relationship. I let him get his greencard because I was terrified not to because he threatened ####### like this guy did to his wife. Shes alot luckier than some of us. My only saving grace is my aunt and my mother are pitt bulls. If they could have already had him arrested they would. Hes got his 10 year papers, I think I will be out of this soon... There is alot of this fake vawa ####### going on. They teach these idiots this now

The problem is that there have been a rash of false vawa claims where the US citizen spouse is literally held hostage by an immigrant spouse claiming abuse.I did not hear that your petition would be denied but you have to understand that alot of men are pulling this to get out of staying in a marriage that they faked to begin with. Until you have been threatened by someone desperate to get papers and who will destroy anyone in their reach to do so, you cant imagine what its like to be on the other side, the US citizen side , faced by a manipulative hateful immigrant spouse who literally plotted to get here.. and then is plotting to get their papers by any means necessary. Until you have had a grown man threaten you as a woman with calling the police when THEY are the one who broke your things and battered you, you could never understand the US citizens side. The IOs are seeing alot of women falling victim to this. You need to ask yourself why you did not just go back home and call it a day. You came over here to be with her... It didnt work out.. Why are you staying? I mean it sounds very plotting if you ask me
Sounds like they had their interview for removing conditions.. She did it and then shortly afterwards she pulled the case... probably due to the way he was acting.. then he went the vawa route. I am not buying a minute of it...
I think there is more to the story...I think somehow wifey pulled the papers because he was unkind to her.. and didnt feel safe around him. I am not buying much of this.. sounds like a fake vawa ploy.. He sounded more interested in hurting her than resolving this peacefully ,most women if you are kind will help you in the end finish up if you were fair and kind

I dont think you are quite understanding the story of the amazigh in Morocco, Algeria Tunisia and Libya.
Berbers are not really the minority in Algeria. Most in Algeria have some kabilye roots because the arabs didnt even arrive there until the 600 and the kabilyes or berbers fought them tooth and nail and even now, they face fierce repression because of their unwillingness to speak arabic over their native language. They now live in distinct areas of Algeria but at one time, the berber kingdom in Algeria was spread from coast to coast, their monoliths even found in the sahara. Each country in the magreb has a completely different berber identity but some traditions are similar, such as the story of the Kahina, a priestess who was rumored to be a Cohen high priestess who has children with 3 different men and slew them after their birth and raised armies of men against the marauding arabs. She scorched the earth of the kabilye high country and even though Moroccan berbers and Algerian kabilyes have differing languages and traditions, they have similar stories. They are not arabs whatsover, their language is closer to celtic or the basque language than the arabs and they are the true original people of north africa. Another thing to remember is that most in Algeria didnt even speak fluent arabic until after the Algerian revolution. They spoke french, algerian darja which is a mix of differing languages including arabic and amazigh. After Ben Bella took the presidency of Algeria after the fight against the French, then subsequently Boumedienne, Egyptian teachers were brought into the country to teach arabic because Ben Bella himself could not speak arabic when he went to meet the leaders of Egypt in the 1960s. It was at this time that teachers came into the country and among these teachers were some radicals that brought the egyptian brotherhood into Algeria and started whats now known as FIS. Before then there was no terrorism among the people of Algeria because they were united in throwing out the French. In the 1990s, more than 100,000 muslims were killed by other muslims and wahabism took root in Algeria. Morocco's story is much different because the berbers have been traditionally opressed in Morocco, unable to name their children what they want and in a consistant fight for their identity against pan arabism, which trivialises their history as some kind of cultural thing instead of a linguistic and national identity. Libya and Tunisia have berber identities as well but their cultures have absorbed it much differently than both Algeria and Morocco, mostly because of the strict totalitarian governments there and other social and linguistic factors
You can never tell a kabiyle that he is happy to lose his language , identity and culture to pan arabism. Their singers have been assasinated, their writers shot and drug through the streets and their music,language and culture repressed by a concept that is new to Algeria, imported by outsiders and incompatible with their history which is one of the Romans, Vandals, Goths, Numidians and in the last 400 year before the French, actually Turkish Ottoman, who are distinctly not arab. Morocco's berbers have a completely different story but they certainly could never be accused of being some kind of nameless minority. The berbers are the fighters of Morocco, the backbone, the mystical amazing secret people of Morocco. In fact, at one time, most of the officers in the Moroccan army were amazigh. Some Moroccans identify as arabs some identify as berber but all Moroccans will agree that they are certainly not middle eastern but distinctly magrebian, with different foods and traditions. You will meet Moroccans that feel they are arab but not all do and it certainly isnt a nameless minority..
I dont think you know enough about kabilyes in Algeria or the berbers in Morocco. You should not only read more, you should seek some out and talk to them. You will have a much different take on pan arabism afterwards. I have more in common as a celt with the kabilyes genetically than you do as an arab..Pan arabism was an import brought into Algeria in 1962 and the berbers of morocco have been struggling to have their identity against this plague of pan arabism for years as well

Could you clarify what a marriage of convenience is? In my opinion it means that someone is trying to obtain a greencard and the woman wants companionship and doesnt mind the risk.
I would like to also say that I know people on the boards that are with younger men and some of them have obtained their greencards and they are still with the older women. I also know, through private messaging several women who do not fit the older woman younger man profile, that have children that are involved in protracted domestic abuse cases, some even sending the man back home and they obviously were not used for papers, the guy just got over here and started beating the ####### out of them or was basically an idiot to her and it wasnt about papers at all. He just tried to act like the men around him growing up and be the "man". I also know people who are on the boards and off that have absolutely no problems whatsoever and are good husbands to their wives and good fathers to their kids so it seems to be a crapshoot. In other words, just because you can still have kids or are pregnant, there is no guarantee that you wont be used for papers or mistreated as a wife and just because you are older, there is no guarantee that all you are is a ticket here. I think there are many factors,upbringing, family pressure ( IE are there other grandkids from other siblings, what is the internal pressure of the person sponsored to have kids, are they easily influenced, do they have an inability to adapt..this really affects their ability to become part of things here) Also, it can take 2 to 3 solid years and then the light comes on and then they like it here...For example, they can drive the American spouse crazy, do things to wind up divorced and then adapt with the next person they meet. If you have the patience, no matter what, patience seems to be the kicker. If you can be patient with someone coming from MENA...up to even 3 years while they adapt and grow, then even if you end up divorced, you can remain friends and have some kind of a life together. I wish I could just wave a magic wand and come out with an outcome but there are no easy answers. The other thing is many because of negative reactions are just not open and honest about outcomes and some after being used have entered into other relationships and just dont really talk about it so newer people seeking answers or opinions when things come up have a hard time finding someone to bounce things off of.
I think the big thing is if you are in a vulnerable situation, like unstable homelife, children that have attachment issues because of prior abuse or divorce, this is definitely not a good idea for them. The attachment of the 5 year process can hurt a child. If your kids are well and everyone is doing great, then you dont face the risk of bringing someone into their life that has a more than 50 percent ( more like 90 percent)chance of leaving. Until kids are doing well, NO ONE should be in their life. Its hard enough for someone coming from another country to adapt than to be thrust into instant father hood and thrown together with an emotionally needy woman. I have watched in horror as some of these children have ended up very messed up, one even commiting suicide 2 years ago (15 year old) because his American mother blamed his teen problems on the demise of her marriage with a Tunisian . In reality, it was the fact the woman was severely overweight and older and had nothing to do with her kids.He married a thin spanish girl. She put this moron over her children and ended up losing the life of her child. This process is not a whim. Its a life altering experience that can cause irreprable damage to vulnerable people resulting in tragedy.
So as long as you have it together as a petitioner and your kids do, no matter what happens, good or bad, you can endure it.You can make this work and be successful at it and end up with a life long friend or spouse...The potential for happiness is there... It is
If you dont or your kids dont, dont do this...Dont.Its too expensive and too much stress.

If you have the room to take the chance, its ok to take the chance. If you are struggling with small children who will be affected financially from this move or you yourself are not emotionally prepared to be left once they have their papers, I would absolutely not recommend this process to you. If you are an older woman who is financially prepared and psychologically strong and really werent doing anything else with your life, and want the company and dont mind the results, I think it can be win win for both. She gets the company and he gets his papers and after hes done with his papers, they can stay friends. For an emotionally vulnerable person or someone with children who havent had alot of stability, this is a terrible move to make. Its full of stress ( the process) very expensive, cultural norms are off the chart and it can permanently damage the kids. I absolutely will say when they get here , the real problems start and I dont think they are always because of the petitioner or the sponsee. Alot of the problems are brought about because they meet people when they get here who are either already divorced from Americans and they get coached on how to get over and what to do or people that undermine their faith in themselves , making them feel less than for marrying outside their culture..Its hard to be tied down to a woman your aunts age when you meet all these lottery winners running around unencumbered. I think when they get here, the economy is hard, money isnt growing on trees and they arent on vacation anymore
PS. I think its harder on marriages where there is a huge number of mena people there. I think its easier to adapt to the lifestyle here when you arent surrounded from people from back home and you get a chance to see what Americans are like. In Orlando, you could literally move here, just hang around Moroccans or Arabs and never really learn the language well because you could work for a moroccan and then pray with them and be here like 4 years and never learn English. Its got me thinking maybe its better to be somewhere alot less arab so you are forced to adapt

I dont think you are quite understanding the story of the amazigh in Morocco, Algeria Tunisia and Libya.
Berbers are not really the minority in Algeria. Most in Algeria have some kabilye roots because the arabs didnt even arrive there until the 600 and the kabilyes or berbers fought them tooth and nail and even now, they face fierce repression because of their unwillingness to speak arabic over their native language. They now live in distinct areas of Algeria but at one time, the berber kingdom in Algeria was spread from coast to coast, their monoliths even found in the sahara. Each country in the magreb has a completely different berber identity but some traditions are similar, such as the story of the Kahina, a priestess who was rumored to be a Cohen high priestess who has children with 3 different men and slew them after their birth and raised armies of men against the marauding arabs. She scorched the earth of the kabilye high country and even though Moroccan berbers and Algerian kabilyes have differing languages and traditions, they have similar stories. They are not arabs whatsover, their language is closer to celtic or the basque language than the arabs and they are the true original people of north africa. Another thing to remember is that most in Algeria didnt even speak fluent arabic until after the Algerian revolution. They spoke french, algerian darja which is a mix of differing languages including arabic and amazigh. After Ben Bella took the presidency of Algeria after the fight against the French, then subsequently Boumedienne, Egyptian teachers were brought into the country to teach arabic because Ben Bella himself could not speak arabic when he went to meet the leaders of Egypt in the 1960s. It was at this time that teachers came into the country and among these teachers were some radicals that brought the egyptian brotherhood into Algeria and started whats now known as FIS. Before then there was no terrorism among the people of Algeria because they were united in throwing out the French. In the 1990s, more than 100,000 muslims were killed by other muslims and wahabism took root in Algeria. Morocco's story is much different because the berbers have been traditionally opressed in Morocco, unable to name their children what they want and in a consistant fight for their identity against pan arabism, which trivialises their history as some kind of cultural thing instead of a linguistic and national identity. Libya and Tunisia have berber identities as well but their cultures have absorbed it much differently than both Algeria and Morocco, mostly because of the strict totalitarian governments there and other social and linguistic factors
You can never tell a kabiyle that he is happy to lose his language , identity and culture to pan arabism. Their singers have been assasinated, their writers shot and drug through the streets and their music,language and culture repressed by a concept that is new to Algeria, imported by outsiders and incompatible with their history which is one of the Romans, Vandals, Goths, Numidians and in the last 400 year before the French, actually Turkish Ottoman, who are distinctly not arab. Morocco's berbers have a completely different story but they certainly could never be accused of being some kind of nameless minority. The berbers are the fighters of Morocco, the backbone, the mystical amazing secret people of Morocco. In fact, at one time, most of the officers in the Moroccan army were amazigh. Some Moroccans identify as arabs some identify as berber but all Moroccans will agree that they are certainly not middle eastern but distinctly magrebian, with different foods and traditions. You will meet Moroccans that feel they are arab but not all do and it certainly isnt a nameless minority..
I dont think you know enough about kabilyes in Algeria or the berbers in Morocco. You should not only read more, you should seek some out and talk to them. You will have a much different take on pan arabism afterwards. I have more in common as a celt with the kabilyes genetically than you do as an arab..Pan arabism was an import brought into Algeria in 1962 and the berbers of morocco have been struggling to have their identity against this plague of pan arabism for years as well

If you have the room to take the chance, its ok to take the chance. If you are struggling with small children who will be affected financially from this move or you yourself are not emotionally prepared to be left once they have their papers, I would absolutely not recommend this process to you. If you are an older woman who is financially prepared and psychologically strong and really werent doing anything else with your life, and want the company and dont mind the results, I think it can be win win for both. She gets the company and he gets his papers and after hes done with his papers, they can stay friends. For an emotionally vulnerable person or someone with children who havent had alot of stability, this is a terrible move to make. Its full of stress ( the process) very expensive, cultural norms are off the chart and it can permanently damage the kids. I absolutely will say when they get here , the real problems start and I dont think they are always because of the petitioner or the sponsee. Alot of the problems are brought about because they meet people when they get here who are either already divorced from Americans and they get coached on how to get over and what to do or people that undermine their faith in themselves , making them feel less than for marrying outside their culture..Its hard to be tied down to a woman your aunts age when you meet all these lottery winners running around unencumbered. I think when they get here, the economy is hard, money isnt growing on trees and they arent on vacation anymore
PS. I think its harder on marriages where there is a huge number of mena people there. I think its easier to adapt to the lifestyle here when you arent surrounded from people from back home and you get a chance to see what Americans are like. In Orlando, you could literally move here, just hang around Moroccans or Arabs and never really learn the language well because you could work for a moroccan and then pray with them and be here like 4 years and never learn English. Its got me thinking maybe its better to be somewhere alot less arab so you are forced to adapt

I hope things work out. Its important for women with alot of assets before marriage to have some kind of separation of assets. Many states are community property states. However, if you arent inheriting anything and if neither has any money, then it doesnt matter does it

Why not? There is nothing wrong with getting married, rich or poor. But to dismiss the lawyers concerns without knowing the assets of the girl or the back story may not exactly be the right things to do. He perhaps knows more about whats going on with her and feels concerned which may not be a bad thing. I certainly would be if a 45 year old friend met a 27 year old on the internet and really , who cares where he is from , and she is wealthy or reasonably well off and hes penniless. Thats a big risk and she does indeed need to be careful,regardless of origin

Did you have assets to bring into the marriage or were they your parents? You are pretty young and with my understanding, its a first marriage for you and your husband and neither had kids. When you are dealing with a woman who has a 250,000 house or more in her name and getting ready to inherit assets from elderly parents, there is absolutely nothing wrong with her taking care of whats hers, especially if she is entering into a marriage with a guy much younger than her and who is bringing nothing to the table. Its unfair for her to give up what she worked for all her life to him when they separate and many of these states have community property laws. For someone who sells something and buys a house with one of these guys, which has happened on the boards, even if it is usually her downpayment, he is entitled to half the house if they separate. For you, who has a new baby with an age matching husband and you both are on pretty level footing ( living in Mass is extremely expensive,) I dont know your take on it.. But watching someone with tons of money marry someone with nothing in an already risky situation and telling them do not worry is frankly irresponsible. Her lawyer may have very well looked at the age difference and for all we know she has a ton of money and he doesnt want to see her lose it under community property laws. There is nothing wrong with seeking advice from a competent attorney and knowing that half of your things just became the husbands. In California, everything is community property and in Florida, even homesteaded properties can be claimed if there was increase in equity or improvements, requiring the divorcing spouse to buy out the other.
I would hate to see a vulnerable woman have to part with her money without knowing the facts.
This goes for American marriages as well as mena

Your lawyer might be a jack leg but there is NOTHING wrong with getting a post nup or a pre nup if you have assets..The marriage may very well last but you need your assets protected... especially if he is bringing nothing to the marriage but "love sweet love".
Talk to him about preparing and one and let your spouse know you need it signed...
I think he meant is he supporting you from morocco or contributing to the marriage... Money cannot leave morocco but it can be saved there to spent on things there in both of your names...
Lawyers dont always say things the way we want to hear them but often there is a grain of truth in what they say. If you come from money and you married someone penniless, it would cause most lawyers to shake their heads. If you have enough money that you even need to talk to an attorney to manage it and you married someone without money, whether it be a foreigner or an american, any lawyer worth their salt would tell you to protect your assets. I am not wealthy but my parents are and I sure as hell would not merge finances without a heavy prenup to protect what my family worked hard for. He was rude but not off base to be careful

The fact of the matter is he was bluntly honest with you. Did you ask him about if he has had cases involving mena/american marriages that turned out badly for the woman. No lawyer , especially if you had prior dealings with him would ever say that unless they have seen something go very south for someone.
If you do have money, especially substantial amounts of it, you absolutely need either a post nup or a pre nup covering allocation of assets if a divorce occurs. You are not a fool but in community property states, your new husband could make a claim for some of your assets and if they get the right attorney, absolutely get some of your money. I have seen 2 women lose in excess of 80000 to MENA husbands and while the majority would never ever ever ever do anything to hurt you, there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with having a post nup drawn up and asking your moroccan husband to sign it relinquishing rights to your finances and property and that he agrees only to take what he brings into the marriage or contributes to. Nothing wrong with that whatsoever. The lawyer could draw that up. Secondly , it can serve as property settlement in the event of a divorce. Its called a POST NUP. If he refuses to sign it, he doesnt love you anyway and you can tell him its for estate purposes. There was a girl on here who leveraged her house for a guy she brought over with kids and he screwed her over and she lost her house..I think he was from Jordan. I know a woman who inherited money from her late husband and her mom in NC and the guy from Morocco ended up with all her furniture and her apartment and she lost her job as well from the guy having her arrested when she went back to get her stuff.
Your lawyer might be a jack leg but there is NOTHING wrong with getting a post nup or a pre nup if you have assets..The marriage may very well last but you need your assets protected... especially if he is bringing nothing to the marriage but "love sweet love".
Talk to him about preparing and one and let your spouse know you need it signed...

The fact of the matter is he was bluntly honest with you. Did you ask him about if he has had cases involving mena/american marriages that turned out badly for the woman. No lawyer , especially if you had prior dealings with him would ever say that unless they have seen something go very south for someone.
If you do have money, especially substantial amounts of it, you absolutely need either a post nup or a pre nup covering allocation of assets if a divorce occurs. You are not a fool but in community property states, your new husband could make a claim for some of your assets and if they get the right attorney, absolutely get some of your money. I have seen 2 women lose in excess of 80000 to MENA husbands and while the majority would never ever ever ever do anything to hurt you, there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with having a post nup drawn up and asking your moroccan husband to sign it relinquishing rights to your finances and property and that he agrees only to take what he brings into the marriage or contributes to. Nothing wrong with that whatsoever. The lawyer could draw that up. Secondly , it can serve as property settlement in the event of a divorce. Its called a POST NUP. If he refuses to sign it, he doesnt love you anyway and you can tell him its for estate purposes. There was a girl on here who leveraged her house for a guy she brought over with kids and he screwed her over and she lost her house..I think he was from Jordan. I know a woman who inherited money from her late husband and her mom in NC and the guy from Morocco ended up with all her furniture and her apartment and she lost her job as well from the guy having her arrested when she went back to get her stuff.
Your lawyer might be a jack leg but there is NOTHING wrong with getting a post nup or a pre nup if you have assets..The marriage may very well last but you need your assets protected... especially if he is bringing nothing to the marriage but "love sweet love".
Talk to him about preparing and one and let your spouse know you need it signed...

Your lawyer might be a jack leg but there is NOTHING wrong with getting a post nup or a pre nup if you have assets..The marriage may very well last but you need your assets protected... especially if he is bringing nothing to the marriage but "love sweet love".
Talk to him about preparing and one and let your spouse know you need it signed...
I think he meant is he supporting you from morocco or contributing to the marriage... Money cannot leave morocco but it can be saved there to spent on things there in both of your names...
Lawyers dont always say things the way we want to hear them but often there is a grain of truth in what they say. If you come from money and you married someone penniless, it would cause most lawyers to shake their heads. If you have enough money that you even need to talk to an attorney to manage it and you married someone without money, whether it be a foreigner or an american, any lawyer worth their salt would tell you to protect your assets. I am not wealthy but my parents are and I sure as hell would not merge finances without a heavy prenup to protect what my family worked hard for. He was rude but not off base to be careful

Instead of all this mumbo jumbo. Has anyone thought of the fact that he might have divorced her in Morocco? All anyone would have to do is somehow contact someone in Moroccan affairs at the prefecture where they lived or where he lived and see if he filed a divorce in absentia. For all you know ,he divorced her as having abandoned him and has 6 kids by now and everyone is driving themselves crazy looking for a solution. Just find out if he divorced her already, get a copy and problem solved

I know 3 still married that are mixed marriages. One has 4 kids and hijabi. One has 5 kids and is niqabi. Both American women one Algerian one Tunisian.One Algerian man kabilye, one kid, spanish wife. Still married. Everyone else ( lets say like 15 couples) is divorced. I had 2 arab friends recently get married after citizenship. The syrian is 52 his wife is 26 and they now have 2 kids. The other is 52 and after citizenship he married his first cousin who is 28 ( Algerian) Its very normal for to marry someone your kids age so although your response isnt popular, its truthful. The guy I petitioned father, unbeknownst to me, married a european in the 70s to go to Europe who was much much older than him. I didnt know that at the time when I met him nor did his family tell me. Using westerners to get papers and marrying much older is not a new thing.. Its been done for years. And its not something to brag about thats for sure. People make whatever choices they want to but surviving a 3rd world financial situation isnt necessarily something westerners can relate to. The internet has amplified many of these relationships. When I was in high school, if someone married for papers it was because somehow they got over here illegally. You didnt see all this marriage fraud at the levels it is at now because how would anyone even meet each other unless it was on vacation or they went through the rigors to get here...The internet is responsible for most of these relations and also causing the opportunities for fraud. I just dont remember this many marriages even in 2002. I also think many Americans being poor and out of work and not able to sponsor or travel is going to cut down on alot of apps as well. I cant see the amounts continuing to increase at least for a while. Most cant afford the thousands it costs to travel there and back and forth like everyone could years ago

I know 3 still married that are mixed marriages. One has 4 kids and hijabi. One has 5 kids and is niqabi. Both American women one Algerian one Tunisian.One Algerian man kabilye, one kid, spanish wife. Still married. Everyone else ( lets say like 15 couples) is divorced. I had 2 arab friends recently get married after citizenship. The syrian is 52 his wife is 26 and they now have 2 kids. The other is 52 and after citizenship he married his first cousin who is 28 ( Algerian) Its very normal for to marry someone your kids age so although your response isnt popular, its truthful. The guy I petitioned father, unbeknownst to me, married a european in the 70s to go to Europe who was much much older than him. I didnt know that at the time when I met him nor did his family tell me. Using westerners to get papers and marrying much older is not a new thing.. Its been done for years. And its not something to brag about thats for sure. People make whatever choices they want to but surviving a 3rd world financial situation isnt necessarily something westerners can relate to. The internet has amplified many of these relationships. When I was in high school, if someone married for papers it was because somehow they got over here illegally. You didnt see all this marriage fraud at the levels it is at now because how would anyone even meet each other unless it was on vacation or they went through the rigors to get here...The internet is responsible for most of these relations and also causing the opportunities for fraud. I just dont remember this many marriages even in 2002. I also think many Americans being poor and out of work and not able to sponsor or travel is going to cut down on alot of apps as well. I cant see the amounts continuing to increase at least for a while. Most cant afford the thousands it costs to travel there and back and forth like everyone could years ago

The mother and his friend talked to you because this is a family project to get him over to the USA with his rich wife who will support him while he saends all his money home. Please please please for your daughters sake and i speak from experience, end this . You will destroy your childrens life. No child needs some temperamental moody ####### yelling and screaming stateside when one thing doesnt go their way? Do you really want this for your daughter. Not a day goes by that I dont regret marrying the monster I married who ruined my life, my mothers life and my childrens psyches. Not a day goes by that I dont regret every minute.I had plenty of time to get out and didnt listen to a damn person excusing away his cruel, abusive and psychotic behavior. He too begged for money back home, lied about it and acted like a spoiled ####### there and here. It wasnt until life bit him in the #### and he actually had to work and suffer and face life here that he improved somewhat but I will never ever forgive him or his jerkwad family for the visa grab they set me up for. You have to be honest with yourself. Dont hurt your little girl cause you are lonely
You wont change him and I could never advise anyone to marry anyone from MENA who wasnt kind and 100 balanced. If they are wacky, they will be wacky times 200000 when they get here and wreak havoc all over your life stateside. You think the money problems are bad now, wait till he gets here and either claims you have abused him, physically and emotionally abuses you here on us soil and you cant get rid of his terrorisng ,emotionally blackmailing butt. The fact his parent are in on it, trying to explain away his psychotic behavior makes it worse. RUN.. RUN..If they arent normal at this point, it will get worse and worse.

The mother and his friend talked to you because this is a family project to get him over to the USA with his rich wife who will support him while he saends all his money home. Please please please for your daughters sake and i speak from experience, end this . You will destroy your childrens life. No child needs some temperamental moody ####### yelling and screaming stateside when one thing doesnt go their way? Do you really want this for your daughter. Not a day goes by that I dont regret marrying the monster I married who ruined my life, my mothers life and my childrens psyches. Not a day goes by that I dont regret every minute.I had plenty of time to get out and didnt listen to a damn person excusing away his cruel, abusive and psychotic behavior. He too begged for money back home, lied about it and acted like a spoiled ####### there and here. It wasnt until life bit him in the #### and he actually had to work and suffer and face life here that he improved somewhat but I will never ever forgive him or his jerkwad family for the visa grab they set me up for. You have to be honest with yourself. Dont hurt your little girl cause you are lonely
You wont change him and I could never advise anyone to marry anyone from MENA who wasnt kind and 100 balanced. If they are wacky, they will be wacky times 200000 when they get here and wreak havoc all over your life stateside. You think the money problems are bad now, wait till he gets here and either claims you have abused him, physically and emotionally abuses you here on us soil and you cant get rid of his terrorisng ,emotionally blackmailing butt. The fact his parent are in on it, trying to explain away his psychotic behavior makes it worse. RUN.. RUN..If they arent normal at this point, it will get worse and worse.

The mother and his friend talked to you because this is a family project to get him over to the USA with his rich wife who will support him while he saends all his money home. Please please please for your daughters sake and i speak from experience, end this . You will destroy your childrens life. No child needs some temperamental moody ####### yelling and screaming stateside when one thing doesnt go their way? Do you really want this for your daughter. Not a day goes by that I dont regret marrying the monster I married who ruined my life, my mothers life and my childrens psyches. Not a day goes by that I dont regret every minute.I had plenty of time to get out and didnt listen to a damn person excusing away his cruel, abusive and psychotic behavior. He too begged for money back home, lied about it and acted like a spoiled ####### there and here. It wasnt until life bit him in the #### and he actually had to work and suffer and face life here that he improved somewhat but I will never ever forgive him or his jerkwad family for the visa grab they set me up for. You have to be honest with yourself. Dont hurt your little girl cause you are lonely
You wont change him and I could never advise anyone to marry anyone from MENA who wasnt kind and 100 balanced. If they are wacky, they will be wacky times 200000 when they get here and wreak havoc all over your life stateside. You think the money problems are bad now, wait till he gets here and either claims you have abused him, physically and emotionally abuses you here on us soil and you cant get rid of his terrorisng ,emotionally blackmailing butt. The fact his parent are in on it, trying to explain away his psychotic behavior makes it worse. RUN.. RUN..If they arent normal at this point, it will get worse and worse.

The mother and his friend talked to you because this is a family project to get him over to the USA with his rich wife who will support him while he saends all his money home. Please please please for your daughters sake and i speak from experience, end this . You will destroy your childrens life. No child needs some temperamental moody ####### yelling and screaming stateside when one thing doesnt go their way? Do you really want this for your daughter. Not a day goes by that I dont regret marrying the monster I married who ruined my life, my mothers life and my childrens psyches. Not a day goes by that I dont regret every minute.I had plenty of time to get out and didnt listen to a damn person excusing away his cruel, abusive and psychotic behavior. He too begged for money back home, lied about it and acted like a spoiled ####### there and here. It wasnt until life bit him in the #### and he actually had to work and suffer and face life here that he improved somewhat but I will never ever forgive him or his jerkwad family for the visa grab they set me up for. You have to be honest with yourself. Dont hurt your little girl cause you are lonely
You wont change him and I could never advise anyone to marry anyone from MENA who wasnt kind and 100 balanced. If they are wacky, they will be wacky times 200000 when they get here and wreak havoc all over your life stateside. You think the money problems are bad now, wait till he gets here and either claims you have abused him, physically and emotionally abuses you here on us soil and you cant get rid of his terrorisng ,emotionally blackmailing butt. The fact his parent are in on it, trying to explain away his psychotic behavior makes it worse. RUN.. RUN..If they arent normal at this point, it will get worse and worse.