Reputation from tdav - VisaJourney

tdav reacted to Going through in I miss Canada oh so much :( August 27, 2018

Moving from Canada to the US (NYC) was quite a culture shock to me....at first, I didn't think so because we're "right next door" in terms of country borders---but it was a huge adjustment for me, and I don't feel I've ever truly assimilated after living here for 14 years. It is completely different living in the USA.

I'm not going to say I love living in the USA, because that would be a lie. I'm not going to say that it was my dream to live in the USA, because that would be a lie, too. If I hadn't ended up marrying an American, I would have never left Canada.

It's hard when you at first you can't go back home to visit---it gets easier when you can, so keep that in mind. My husband never really understood how different it was for me when I first arrived---until I explained to him that everyday simple things he takes for granted in NYC was completely foreign to me. I told him that at first, I didn't know how to pay to get on a bus, how to load a metrocard, didn't know what food brands were better than others when grocery shopping (unless it was a brand I was already familiar with), etc. just really really simple things that were so daunting to me at first because I wasn't familiar with stuff. Everyone who moves to the US from another country goes through this---doesn't matter if perceived lifestyles/culture is the same---it's never really the same, no matter where you came from.

One thing that did help me in the beginning to not miss Canada so much was searching out food brands I was familiar with, and getting those shipped to me from Canadian websites or family members---ah, the satisfaction I felt when I cooked with Presidents Choice sauce again!! lol Sounds silly, I know, but it helped me in some way feel "at home" for a little bit. You may want to think about doing the same...there's some great companies out there for "expats" to shop from.

At the very beginning during my AOS days, I also threw myself into making where we lived more of a homey feel. Small decorating projects and shopping for home accessories took up a lot of my time and made the initial weeks go by a bit faster. It also made me feel more invested into where I now lived. I was afraid to explore much of the area where I lived except walking for a few blocks in one direction or the other, because I was nervous I'd get lost---but that eased up with time as well. With the internet, keeping up with local Canadian news was awesome, as well as watching Canadian television shows. All these things I suggest to you, to get a piece of home once in a while.

If you do end up moving back to Canada with your spouse in the future---keep in mind that they will go through the same feelings you are experiencing right now. It's hard to get someone else to understand what it's like to uproot yourself and move to a different country---what it's like to leave your job, family, friends, cuisine, and familiarity all behind----unless they've done it themselves.

tdav reacted to NikLR in I miss Canada oh so much :( August 27, 2018

It's a more different than you can realize, especially if you are used to being independent. Unless you've lived in both places it can be hard to comprehend how different Canada and the USA really are. No one would say the UK and Australia are the same. I wouldn't claim Mexico is just like Guatemala or Belize.
I still get homesickness. I havent left the USA since 2014. I havent seen my mom in 2 years. I have a niece I've never met. Just because travel can be easier doesnt mean we can all afford it. It is expensive in my area to live.
Just because you dont understand how someone can feel a way doesnt mean they don't or that their feelings are less than.

tdav reacted to MicheleRob in December 2016 Filers (merged) May 9, 2017

Wow what a joke the medical was. Had to drive 4 hours to Toronto because that was closest approved immigration medical doctor and the doctor made my fiance weigh and measure HIMSELF, asked him if he was sick, if he had ever been arrested for drugs or alcohol, handed him a form to go across hall for xray and a cup to go across street to lab for pee test and blood work and that was all! I can't believe there has to be specific doctors to go to and closest one was 4 hours just for that! Next up we have 9 hour drive to consulate for interview next week!

tdav got a reaction from MikiC in December 2016 Filers (merged) March 30, 2017