RC40

I never thought I would be typing this message, but here I am. I married my wife on 11/7 on a K1 visa. Today she revealed to me that the only reason she wants to be with me was to get a visa to bring her family here. We haven't filed AOS yet. What should I do?

Ok, so I talked to her more and I believe the fraud part was a misunderstanding, so if I could I would change the title of this topic if I could. The one person was certainly right when he said Filipinas can sometimes say the complete opposite of what they mean. I certainly felt scared and unsure what to do when I made this thread. I'm sure that fear and past pains have also driven so many to reply. I don't wish to put any of our other private details on here. I kind of regret making the thread, but my initial fear was valid. I've gotten some good advice from the replies, so I hope it helps someone else in a similar situation. I do not wish anything bad to happen to her. I still love her. I will take my comments offline now.

I'm sure your million times thinking is more along the lines of "how can I frame this in my mind so I don't have to feel bad about myself?" Instead of "am I really doing the right thing?" All of my original suspicions have been confirmed.

Based on what you've said, the situation seems pretty clear: your husband is feeling lonely and ignored by your lack of communication and has been feeling this way for a long time now. He is now seeking the company of another woman, probably because he's feeling betrayed by you and he's close to reaching a breaking point (or he has already). I believe him when he says it's platonic between them right now, but I wouldn't be surprised if it developed into more than that sooner or later. His statements tell me that he is pretty darn close to ending the whole thing. Not necessarily because he doesn't love you anymore, but because he's probably confused, hurt and yes, this new woman is a new option that has now popped up in his life, making him feel valued and cared for. I want to make it clear that there's still no excuse for your husband hanging out with other women like that, but it's probably the best explanation as to why he's doing it at this point.
My advice would be this: if you truly love your husband (personally I don't understand why you wouldn't want to talk to him every day if possible, but that's just me), claim him back NOW before it gets too late and someone else gets into his life and heart for good. Tell him, show him, fly over to be with him asap (I know you said you're about to do this) and make sure you tell and show him every single day until the day comes when you move to the States to live with him.
Best of luck!

Sounds like you are making excuses as to why you don't talk to him. It's hard enough he is alone physically, you have left him alone emotionally. He also clearly thinks your family is more important than he is, if true you should not be married, if false you need to let him know.
Either way this will require work, time, and lots of communication.

I'm sorry but you need to be on Skype with him every night for hours and hours. He needs to see and hear you everyday it's the only way he will feel some relief from his loneliness. Communication is the key! He just feels I think that you don't love him the way he loves you and he's hurt. Might have told you about this woman to show you he is still attractive to other women. A way to get your attention which he obviously has. Your going to have to sacrifice your me time to keep this together until you can be with him forever. I'll be praying for you.

This in my opinion is the problem. You need to get on the damn phone, skype, whatever, every day and be talking to him. You need to show him you really care about your relationship. Your actions are sending him the opposite message.
I've been in a relationship with my fiancée for 8 months. In those 8 months we have compiled over 1200 pages of chat logs and countless hours on the phone. It's the only way either of us keeps our sanity by knowing, without a doubt, that every day our partner is there for us going through the same thing we are going through.

Your husband is communicating with you. He's telling you what his needs are, and how they're not being met. This? Is part of marriage - listening to one another. An appropriate response is not "be more like me," it's to figure out what you can do to help him have his needs met while also meeting your own.
If you're not willing to work with him to make sure his emotional needs are being met, then it sounds like the problem isn't with him.

I know other "non-radicalized" Islamists here in the states and this has never been part of their practice. I agree with the previous comment about getting married and going for a spousal visa. There are long waits for K1 visas and you could potentially wait a long time to get a denial. It's not worth the risk.

I'm sure your million times thinking is more along the lines of "how can I frame this in my mind so I don't have to feel bad about myself?" Instead of "am I really doing the right thing?" All of my original suspicions have been confirmed.

I'm sorry, but I'm going to call this for what it is. This is fraud and deceit. I'm happy that immigration will look at people like this with high suspicion. The fact that she is having to cover all of her actions up with things like "I married him for the right reasons" and "I want to divorce him after I get citizenship for the kids" shows me a pattern of black & white thinking that is a red flag for a cluster B type personality. If the OP really operated under the model of right reason she would fly her kids home to see their dad or try to get him here on a tourist visa instead of committing fraud.