using the system

[Kajikit 65]

Eric, the question is, since you have been with this woman for three years and spent so much time and money visiting her etc, and you are seriously committed to spending your life with her, why are you not ready to get married to her? If you want to bring her to the US to live that's what you're going to have to do... and if you don't actually want to marry her, what are you getting out of the relationship?

If you do go for the fiance visa and bring her over, you have to marry her within 90 days. It doesn't have to be a church wedding that costs a million bucks - you can get married at the courthouse for less than a hundred. It's still a valid marriage. Two months ought to be plenty of time for your fiance to decide whether she's happy to live here... and that leaves you another month for the marriage.

[silverbutterfly228 0]

yes, we are serious about each other, thank you for those unwelcoming comments that have suggested we're not. a three year long term relationship is just that... very serious.

Well when you say things like "We're both willing to go through the hoops necessary to "marry", just for the sake of the paperwork," "us claiming we are engaged to get the visa," and "fake the marriage" than those are the comments that you are going to get. The purpose of the visa is if you already have the intent and am sure you want to marry.

Yes the government doesn't give a lot of options, in my opinion as well, to test out how things are if u live together and work, like u could if ur both from the same country. I looked into work visa way back and you need to have some sort of degree or college to be able to get it. i'm not an expert on it though. I think you should try the student visa so she can learn more english and earn a degree. She needs to have enough money to support herself for at least a year for tuition and living expenses on a student visa. If she goes for student visa and gets it, goes to school, learns you and her really want to still be together, get married, than she can adjust status while she is there. there could be a 2 year residency restriction for her to return to her country. i dont know which student visa that applies to. sooo much info out there and you have a lot of reading to do. I seriously read for days over each.

[canusa 0]

Dont forget if you bring her here on a k1 you are responsible for her for 10 yeras.So if it dosent work out and she dosent move back to her home country,you will still have to support her.I was with my fiance for over 2 years before we applied for the K1.But We spent alot more time togother than you and your fiance.Months at a time!We both knew we loved one another and wanted to spend the rest of out life togother.You say you make enough that you can support her?Then why dont you staart by having her visit you for a few months(like we did)and get to know oyur family etc?That would give her a chance to brush up on her english and see what she thinks of this great country.There are alot of programs she can get for the computer that would help her with her english for starters.Id pass on trying for a work visa,cause she would never get it.As for the K1 if she doesnt get her EAD at the POE,it may take months to get it.So you would already be married and she still would not beable to work.

[rockamandy 0]

Two months ought to be plenty of time for your fiance to decide whether she's happy to live here... and that leaves you another month for the marriage.

just disagreeing here - two months isn't enough time for anyone to decide whether the're happy to live somewhere. if anything, the first few months are a happy dreamy vacation. that was merely the case for me when i moved to england for 1.5 years (on a student visa). of course, doing that isn't a viable option for everybody, but it was very much worth it.

Edited April 11, 2006 by rockamandy

[kitkat1 5]

we are not yet ready to get married.

Eric, I think you already answered your own question. Since you know you are not ready to get married, the best answer might be to continue spending time with her via visits the way you have been. When you ARE ready to get married, as scary as that is, you'll know it.

My fiance and I knew we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together, but neither of us was very interested in actually getting married. At the time, he was living here in the US with me so our plan was to live happily ever after and not get married. But circumstances intervened and now the only way for us to be together forever is to get married. And the only way we can do that is by getting him a K1 visa. So we're not 100% comfortable with the marriage part, but we have no question about our love and committment to each other - and that's the part you really need to be sure about.

[iceyspots 0]

Using the system is baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad........

Edited April 12, 2006 by iceyspots

[dmartmar 1]

Two months ought to be plenty of time for your fiance to decide whether she's happy to live here or not, which leaves you another month for marriage.

Just disagreeing here - two months isn't enough time for anyone to decide whether the're happy to live somewhere. if anything, the first few months are a happy dreamy vacation. that was merely the case for me when i moved to england for 1.5 years (on a student visa). of course, doing that isn't a viable option for everybody, but it was very much worth it.

Two months, not only to decide whether or not she could live here, but also to decide if they can live together or not.

Not enough time for neither, nor.

Edited April 12, 2006 by dmartmar

[*Robert* 2]

Sorry all, but I've just got to be very blunt here.

Eric, if you truly love her, then what’s wrong with marrying her? You don’t just marry someone for the sake of the paperwork, or get them over here so you can kick the tires and take her for a test drive in the U.S.! That has visa fraud written all over it! What do you mean to see how well her English improves? If she can’t speak English very well, how do you expect her to get a job? Without a work visa, she wouldn’t be able to legally work anyway!

The K-1 seems faster than what? Getting a B1/B2 visa? You don’t “claim” you are engaged, though there is no rule that says you have to be engaged to get a K-1 visa, only that you get married within 90 days of their arrival in the U.S. “Fake marriage”? Are you mad? Why do you keep asking if anyone here has done that? Are you hoping someone on here will give you advice to break the law and commit visa fraud? Well you’ve come to the wrong place. The only stories we hear are about people like you who come here and try to stir up problems. You give no information about your fiancée, where she is from, yet you say you love her and can’t be apart from her, but you’re “not ready” to get married! Your story is full of contradictions.

For those of us who do love our significant other and wish nothing but to be with them, as you put it, are applying for K-1 visas LEGALLY!!! We intend on marrying our significant others within 90 days of their arrival. We are not committing visa fraud. We are following the laws of the United States. So lets see… you take marriage very seriously, but not the laws of our country? You would enter into a fake marriage, with a woman you love so much and can’t be without, but you aren’t 100% sure. It sounds to me like, until you’re 100% sure, you better suck it up and get used to being apart from your girlfriend. Must have been nice to go see her once every 3 months. Sounds like you should have stuck with what you were doing. There are people on here that haven’t seen their fiancé(e) for over a year, yet they remain committed and true to following a very long and tedious legal procedure, which you have come here to make a mockery of!

The title of your thread “using the system” says it all. I suggest you go elsewhere to find your answers and not cause any problems on this board for the rest of us, because we don't use the system. We obey it and follow the letter of the law.

[tmma 467]

Sorry all, but I've just got to be very blunt here.

Eric, if you truly love her, then what’s wrong with marrying her? You don’t just marry someone for the sake of the paperwork, or get them over here so you can kick the tires and take her for a test drive in the U.S.! That has visa fraud written all over it! What do you mean to see how well her English improves? If she can’t speak English very well, how do you expect her to get a job? Without a work visa, she wouldn’t be able to legally work anyway!

The K-1 seems faster than what? Getting a B1/B2 visa? You don’t “claim” you are engaged, though there is no rule that says you have to be engaged to get a K-1 visa, only that you get married within 90 days of their arrival in the U.S. “Fake marriage”? Are you mad? Why do you keep asking if anyone here has done that? Are you hoping someone on here will give you advice to break the law and commit visa fraud? Well you’ve come to the wrong place. The only stories we hear are about people like you who come here and try to stir up problems. You give no information about your fiancée, where she is from, yet you say you love her and can’t be apart from her, but you’re “not ready” to get married! Your story is full of contradictions.

For those of us who do love our significant other and wish nothing but to be with them, as you put it, are applying for K-1 visas LEGALLY!!! We intend on marrying our significant others within 90 days of their arrival. We are not committing visa fraud. We are following the laws of the United States. So lets see… you take marriage very seriously, but not the laws of our country? You would enter into a fake marriage, with a woman you love so much and can’t be without, but you aren’t 100% sure. It sounds to me like, until you’re 100% sure, you better suck it up and get used to being apart from your girlfriend. Must have been nice to go see her once every 3 months. Sounds like you should have stuck with what you were doing. There are people on here that haven’t seen their fiancé(e) for over a year, yet they remain committed and true to following a very long and tedious legal procedure, which you have come here to make a mockery of!

The title of your thread “using the system” says it all. I suggest you go elsewhere to find your answers and not cause any problems on this board for the rest of us, because we don't use the system. We obey it and follow the letter of the law.

Amen to that!

[Miranda&James 8]

As for the K1 if she doesnt get her EAD at the POE,it may take months to get it.So you would already be married and she still would not beable to work.

EXCELLENT point. If you want her to come here on the K1 visa the only way she can work is to get a temporary EAD at her POE, and even this will not work until she gets a SSN (can take upto four weeks to get I hear, maybe longer). So, she would be able to be here working for approximately two months, if that.

What you are suggesting sounds very much like fraud to me. The K1 visa is for people who intend to marry, it isn't a try things out for awhile visa.

[KAA 0]

Eric,

Don’t take it the wrong way but this forum may not be for you. People here are dealing with lots of stress because of the long wait to get this visa. I'm not going to bad mouth you, but for example my fiancee is pregnant with our first child.

We have to go through this ridiculous process just like everyone else, stand in line and wait. I can’t even see the stages of my baby growing (and will never be able to see those stages, until we have another).

I know there are people who would use the K1 visa for other purposes but I can guarantee you most of us on this site are pissed off because of those people who make the process that much longer for us.

So if you love her and want to spend the rest of your life with her use the K-1, but if this a try out thingy then most of us probably wont sympathize with you.

[rebeccajo 14]

Her country might help us better answer your questions.

[SENKA 0]

My friednly advice "Do not claim you are engaged if you are not", it will only work against you. It's the best to be honest. If you are not ready to get married, then ask for visitor visa.

Senka

[meddykomp 0]

My husband and I got married much more quickly than we would have if he had been a USC. I would say the majority of the people on this forum also did that or will be doing that. If you start the K-1 process, it is still going to be quite some time before your girlfriend is here. Some countries take longer than other. Although you do not mention what country your girlfriend is from, you do mention that VWP is not an option there, so it seems possible she might be in a country that has the potential for delays. What you need to ask yourself and your girlfriend is this: "Are you prepared to get married in a year?"

What happens if she doesn't become better at speaking english? Or cannot get a job here? Only the 2 of you can decide when you want to get married. Honestly my heart goes out to your girlfriend because I know what its like to cry at night over the separation. Unfortunately, the government here has no provisions for seeing if it works or doesnt. You have to decide if the risk is worth it. If you have been with her that long and you love her, maybe you should ask her to marry you.

[Fandango 1,440]

I'm aware of the other types of visas, however the K1 seems to be faster and would work more to our benefit which is why I was asking the question to a group of K1 visa applicants...

My questions were more along the lines of what are your thoughts on us claiming we are engaged to get the visa? do you suggest waiting out the 90 days to see if things are working, or would you suggest fake the marriage right away so she can begin applying for AOS and work here? would it work? has anyone here done that? heard stories?

Thanks!

This actually turns my stomach...seriously, man...KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE!