The Parents in My Classroom - How my students stay tethered, via FaceTime and email, to their homes.

[yuna628 9,530]

An odd one from Slate but a lot of schools are now going for cellphone free policies - either taking phones from kids or locking them in lockers for the day. Our local schools are planning to do this and it's causing a lot of uproar in parents who want 24/7 access, and some kids that are scared something bad will happen and will be unable to call their parents. But there are other reasons parents are demanding all sorts of uses for cellphones in class.

 

Some notable snippets:

 

Quote

Some parents of kids in my class watch the screens of their kids’ school-issued Chromebooks remotely when they’re in class. “My mom wants to know I’m not playing video games,” a student said. Many parents are so tightly tethered to their kids it’s as though they’re sitting in our classrooms with us. And it’s not only through screens. Some of them contact us about schoolwork so their kid doesn’t have to. A student told me he saw no reason to talk to me about an assignment he was struggling with “because I know my mom is going to email you about it for me.”

I think what’s not getting across to parents is that school isn’t a livestream. And it’s for students, not their parents. The incessant monitoring is disrupting the learning environment and violating the sacred space of the classroom.

{..}

A few months ago, one of my students sneakily took a picture of a spelling quiz and sent it to his mother. Ten minutes later—students were still taking the quiz—I received an email from her asking why I had given it and if he could, instead, take it the next day “so he can review more.”

The student hadn’t prepared for the quiz and was understandably anxious. He’d also been trained that his mom would take care of it for him. But as soon as she took over, the opportunity for him to work through his frustration was gone. If he had experienced the natural consequence of being unprepared, chances are he would have studied for the next time. The lesson available to him could have been greater than studying for one quiz. He didn’t learn it.

Educators don’t mind when parents contact us with questions. We want good communication with families, and we hope our students share what they are doing in school. But the increased parental surveillance has blurred the boundaries between home and school so much that students are not developing into independent thinkers.

{..}

The classroom is so important that even during lockdown, when we were remote, teachers tried to duplicate the physical space. Students played games in the Zoom chat, shared their screens to show presentations they created, and led discussions. Yet, some parents still violated the sanctity of the classroom by surveilling their kids.

One day, during that time, a mother of one of my students sent me an email. The subject line, in all caps, read, “I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING AND I DON’T LIKE IT.”

We were discussing Romeo and Juliet. Her email quoted things students had shared about whether they believe in love at first sight and if they think that love lasts forever. It was the liveliest discussion they’d had all year. With everyone stuck at home—and given the increased mental health concerns during the pandemic—I was glad my students were eager to talk about relationships and human connections in the cyber world we’d created together. I never fully understood why the parent didn’t “like” what she heard. It didn’t matter. Our classroom wasn’t for her. Her son barely spoke in class after that. I tried to encourage him, but his mother was right there with us, having scolded both teacher and student. https://slate.com/human-interest/2024/03/phone-free-schools-movement-parents-teenagers.html

 

[Dashinka 23,272]

OMG, my parents wanted a break from the kids.  During the school year it was school, in the Summer, it was get your behind outside.  No phones, no nothing else except be back for dinner before the church bells ran (6p), and after dinner, get in when the street lights come one.  I guess what we have now is "progress".

[yuna628 9,530]

1 hour ago, Dashinka said:

OMG, my parents wanted a break from the kids.  During the school year it was school, in the Summer, it was get your behind outside.  No phones, no nothing else except be back for dinner before the church bells ran (6p), and after dinner, get in when the street lights come one.  I guess what we have now is "progress".

I've been thinking a lot about this article ever since it popped up and it's just nuts. At first I thought it was going to be about kids using phones to goof off in class but no... it turns out it's the parents being all insane. This is not a healthy way to raise a child, nor is it a healthy state for a parent to be in either.

[TBoneTX 43,154]

12 hours ago, yuna628 said:

one of my students sneakily took a picture of a spelling quiz and sent it to his mother. Ten minutes later—students were still taking the quiz—I received an email from her asking why I had given it and if he could, instead, take it the next day “so he can review more.”

I'd have immediately given the student a grade of F and firmly explained the reasoning to both him and Mom.  Then, I'd give the kid a specially prepared, much more difficult test, to give him the chance to earn the lowest possible D-minus.

12 hours ago, yuna628 said:

I never fully understood why the parent didn’t “like” what she heard. It didn’t matter. Our classroom wasn’t for her. Her son barely spoke in class after that. I tried to encourage him, but his mother was right there with us, having scolded both teacher and student.

Again, mishandled.  By return e-mail (cc: principal), I'd have diplomatically but firmly told off the mother and encouraged her to write her specific complaints to the principal, cc: me.

 

Parent-teacher relationships are to be cultivated, but when one or the other crosses the line, the line must be clarified -- firmly and early.