A Broken Journey

[doodlebug 3]

I can't freakin' believe I'm saying this but I agree with Sarah on this one.

I also think that although we all love you, this may not be the right place to recruit advice on this particular situation. I'm not saying that 'cause it's a visa forum obviously since other issues do come up that we can all help on but I just really believe that you need professional help right now. I also think that taking a Leave of Absence and checking in somewhere might not be a bad idea, but then that is only my experience talking. No I did not have an abusive husband but I did have a very abusive family member, albeit not physical abuse.

I hope you get the help that you need, hon.

[Together4ever 1]

Consider it part of my healing. I really don't want advice. I've already heard it all. It all just makes an ugly smelly mud between my ears that keeps me awake at night.

Just to reiterate, see above. I needed to post this because I don't want to feel I have anything to hide. I wish all of you only the best of life.

Edited May 31, 2007 by Together4ever

[~Jackie~ 30]

Sarah, did you read my post AFTER that post? I was not condoning Jean to stay. In the post you quoted me from, my point was that not EVERY woman leaves.I certainly was not telling her to stay with her husband if she is in danger. I'm glad the rest of my friends here knew what I meant, and I'm sorry I wasted 2 minutes from my morning explaining it to you. I can assure you it won't happen again.

Jackie

[ya falaha! 0]

Jean, perhaps you should request that this thread be closed since, I believe, all you're gonna get here is advice that you don't want. I think we all appreciate your honesty and bravery for telling your story, I know I do. I wish you the best.

[brnidokiegurl 0]

yep best wishes

[deeshla 0]

I want to make one final post then I'll just fade into the woodwork. This morning for the first time I put on a lovely short sleeved shirt, exposing the colorful blotches on my arms, and came to work. I drew a smiley face on one of the bruises and realized God has tapped me on the shoulder and given me a wonderful opportunity to recreate myself. It made me smile. Yes, I love my husband. That makes me smile too. It doesn't mean what he did is excusable and I don't know really know if he will be with me again or not. I have today. I have on short sleeves with no regret or shame, I have a smiley face on my left arm and a smile on my face and a hope in my heart and THAT is what will get me through this whether I return to him or send him packing.

You can think I'm crazy, but the American Indians held a belief that the Great Spirit would leave tokens and reminders of things to come, sometimes in the form of an animal appearing unexpectedly, a face in the clouds, a sudden breeze. Yesterday morning I had to leave to work early. I vomitted twice and felt so unbelievably tired. As I was walking to my car, a white feather fell at my feet. I said, "Thank you, God." I went home, slept 6 hours, spent the evening watching tv with my teenaged son and woke up this morning with hope that whatever the future brings, it will be ok.

You are in denial. I really hope you get the help you need.

[noura 0]

I want to make one final post then I'll just fade into the woodwork. This morning for the first time I put on a lovely short sleeved shirt, exposing the colorful blotches on my arms, and came to work. I drew a smiley face on one of the bruises and realized God has tapped me on the shoulder and given me a wonderful opportunity to recreate myself. It made me smile. Yes, I love my husband. That makes me smile too. It doesn't mean what he did is excusable and I don't know really know if he will be with me again or not. I have today. I have on short sleeves with no regret or shame, I have a smiley face on my left arm and a smile on my face and a hope in my heart and THAT is what will get me through this whether I return to him or send him packing.

You can think I'm crazy, but the American Indians held a belief that the Great Spirit would leave tokens and reminders of things to come, sometimes in the form of an animal appearing unexpectedly, a face in the clouds, a sudden breeze. Yesterday morning I had to leave to work early. I vomitted twice and felt so unbelievably tired. As I was walking to my car, a white feather fell at my feet. I said, "Thank you, God." I went home, slept 6 hours, spent the evening watching tv with my teenaged son and woke up this morning with hope that whatever the future brings, it will be ok.

You are in denial. I really hope you get the help you need.

You rock, thanks for keeping it real, Deeshla... I think a lot of people in this forum are in denial - and it ain't no river!

[dazy 0]

I want to make one final post then I'll just fade into the woodwork. This morning for the first time I put on a lovely short sleeved shirt, exposing the colorful blotches on my arms, and came to work. I drew a smiley face on one of the bruises and realized God has tapped me on the shoulder and given me a wonderful opportunity to recreate myself. It made me smile. Yes, I love my husband. That makes me smile too. It doesn't mean what he did is excusable and I don't know really know if he will be with me again or not. I have today. I have on short sleeves with no regret or shame, I have a smiley face on my left arm and a smile on my face and a hope in my heart and THAT is what will get me through this whether I return to him or send him packing.

You can think I'm crazy, but the American Indians held a belief that the Great Spirit would leave tokens and reminders of things to come, sometimes in the form of an animal appearing unexpectedly, a face in the clouds, a sudden breeze. Yesterday morning I had to leave to work early. I vomitted twice and felt so unbelievably tired. As I was walking to my car, a white feather fell at my feet. I said, "Thank you, God." I went home, slept 6 hours, spent the evening watching tv with my teenaged son and woke up this morning with hope that whatever the future brings, it will be ok.

I'm a lurker here and rarely ever post. But I think that you need to seriously step back and look at this relationship that you have. Deep down inside, you know that you posted because you know that you are in over your head. Please run, don't walk, to people that can help you. I know that it's embarrassing to admit that you made a mistake by getting involved with this man, but the embarrassment is nothing compared to what he has already done to you and WILL do in the future.

[Together4ever 1]

I want to make one final post then I'll just fade into the woodwork. This morning for the first time I put on a lovely short sleeved shirt, exposing the colorful blotches on my arms, and came to work. I drew a smiley face on one of the bruises and realized God has tapped me on the shoulder and given me a wonderful opportunity to recreate myself. It made me smile. Yes, I love my husband. That makes me smile too. It doesn't mean what he did is excusable and I don't know really know if he will be with me again or not. I have today. I have on short sleeves with no regret or shame, I have a smiley face on my left arm and a smile on my face and a hope in my heart and THAT is what will get me through this whether I return to him or send him packing.

You can think I'm crazy, but the American Indians held a belief that the Great Spirit would leave tokens and reminders of things to come, sometimes in the form of an animal appearing unexpectedly, a face in the clouds, a sudden breeze. Yesterday morning I had to leave to work early. I vomitted twice and felt so unbelievably tired. As I was walking to my car, a white feather fell at my feet. I said, "Thank you, God." I went home, slept 6 hours, spent the evening watching tv with my teenaged son and woke up this morning with hope that whatever the future brings, it will be ok.

I'm a lurker here and rarely ever post. But I think that you need to seriously step back and look at this relationship that you have. Deep down inside, you know that you posted because you know that you are in over your head. Please run, don't walk, to people that can help you. I know that it's embarrassing to admit that you made a mistake by getting involved with this man, but the embarrassment is nothing compared to what he has already done to you and WILL do in the future.

I am embarassed of nothing. I have nothing to explain or justify to the people here who feel they own my reality and know my mind. I have requested this closed so the harpies can go feed on someone else.

[noura 0]

I am embarassed of nothing. I have nothing to explain or justify to the people here who feel they own my reality and know my mind. I have requested this closed so the harpies can go feed on someone else.

I assure you, Jean, no one here feels they "own" your reality... everyone is concerned for your welfare. But, yes, this thread is probably best closed since it is such a HOT topic. Too bad, tho.... I really do hope you get the help you need and make the best decisions for your future.

[Kez/JWolf 6]

You need to get out and get out now....... I lived with my ex for 15 years and yes I wore my bruises with smiles too... the beatings became a regular thing and I got very good at appearing happy and full of life, but with every blow that struck me a little bit more was dying inside....

It all ended the day my ex took a baseball bat to me and if it was not for my 13 year old son going to a phonebox and calling the police I would have been dead.... I spent 3 months in hospital (6 weeks in ICU) 12 lots of surgery to fix metal rods to my legs and hips and 100's of hours of physical therapy just to get me on my feet...

That was in 1994.... I am still having surgey to fix things in my legs and I know that I will be in a wheelchair in the future....

So please please dont kid yourself.... if he has beat you once he WILL do it again.... get out and stay out....

Kez

[ya falaha! 0]

I want to make one more comment...what about the toll this takes on your children? My mother and aunts are grown children to a man who beat his wife (their mother), they still talk about it and hurt from it to this day and their father has been dead for 30+ yrs. My husband's father beat his mother. When you first posted this thread I discussed it with my husband. He told me that wife beating is somewhat common in Egypt. He then told me of the time his father beat his mother when he was 9 yrs old. This particular beating was very bad and she ended up bed ridden for a month. My husband had tears in his eyes relaying this story. It affects the children long after the bruises are healed and the children are grown.

[LaL 418]

this topic has been closed per request of the OP. thank you.

[Captain Ewok 1,857]

This topic has been closed per the request of the original poster. Thank you for your understanding.