Need advice: Am I exaggerating?

[UnaMexicana 153]

My husband told me that he is going skydiving with his brother. Just like that. Not like.. hey this would be nice, you know I would want to try it.. he just said this is the date and this is what is happening.

I got so scared when he said that, that i started to hyperventilate and got stinging in my heart.

He asked if that was o.k. to go... and I told him to please do whatever else he wanted, but sky diving really seemed like something risky and unnecessary to try (he has never mentioned any interest in this, nor are we the kind of people that are "addicted to adrenaline).

His brother has done this a few times in the past, he told me as to comfort me... I insisted that this was too scary to even picture. I was really feeling fainting at that moment and just wanting to cry.. laugh.. cry again. He just said.. well he paid for it and I am sorry.

I was bad.. i was really feeling physically ill. Then I felt even worse with his complete disregard of what I felt about it. I still get stinging in my heart when i think about it... kind of like when you are going to have a panic attack. It scares me to death that something might go wrong.

So:

- I think jumping off a plane is something you would discuss with your wife.. but what do you think? I know there are no rules when it comes to couples but at least us, we always talk (ed) about things before actually making a decision.

He is livig with his brother at the moment to save on rent... gets a hard time sometimes and feels pushed to oblige in certain things (spend time with him and the ex wife he still sees and his daughter, etc). I try to understand but still i just think this us way too much to just tell him: hey, we're doing this and it's paid for.

- Please tell me this is something common and that he will be okay.

Best,

UnaMexicana

[poolbruce 22]

believe in your love for each other and work on being together

I believe like you.....why jump out of a perfectly good plane....hehehehe

[UnaMexicana 153]

Hahahahaha i know. Thanks.

[Caryh 5,206]

Lots of people jump out of planes in the USA. Although I'm also of the mind that I'm not jumping out of a perfectly good plane.

I think your husband might be a bit more of a thrill seeker than you are aware of.

[Illiria 980]

His body, his choice. Loads of my friends have done it, they have been brought it by family or it's part of an extended holiday package so in their cases it was paid for too. Kind of a once in a lifetime opportunity as they themselves would never normally have the spare cash to fritter away on it.

I am terrified of and do not really trust roller-coasters but my husband loves them.

I have only asked my husband not to go on one once as I had seen it had broken down loads that year, he assured me that it would be fine and he would be ok so he went ahead and went on it.

We have an agreement that he will ask me to go with him on rides as he likes to share stuff he enjoys but he won't force or trick me me to go on it, not since the Jurassic park ride incident (almost deafened him on the big drop I thought was smaller than it was).

Also you are saying he is being pressured to see his child or his brothers?

[UnaMexicana 153]

You are right. It is his choice and no matter how scared it makes me, after much consideration I know I need to give him a .... break.

Hehehe I can imagine myself in your position, deafening him when going down on a roller coaster.

I guess I was not very clear on the child part - Since he lives with his brother (the two of them alone) and split rent to save for when I get there, its the ex wife of his brother and their daughter that he sometimes feels obliged to spend time with. The lady is a nightmare - controlling, forbids microwaves, ice cream, candy, etc. in her exhusband's house. It all needs to be spotless and candy-free when the girl comes to visit. But.. thats another story!

Thank you so much for your input.

Best,

UnaMexicana

His body, his choice. Loads of my friends have done it, they have been brought it by family or it's part of an extended holiday package so in their cases it was paid for too. Kind of a once in a lifetime opportunity as they themselves would never normally have the spare cash to fritter away on it.

I am terrified of and do not really trust roller-coasters but my husband loves them.

I have only asked my husband not to go on one once as I had seen it had broken down loads that year, he assured me that it would be fine and he would be ok so he went ahead and went on it.

We have an agreement that he will ask me to go with him on rides as he likes to share stuff he enjoys but he won't force or trick me me to go on it, not since the Jurassic park ride incident (almost deafened him on the big drop I thought was smaller than it was).

Also you are saying he is being pressured to see his child or his brothers?

You are very right about that. Hard to believe in 8 years that I know him the topic never came up - I guess we never stop getting to know our partner, do we?

He assures me this is deifnitely something he wants to try.. so be it. All I can do is pray it goes well and close my eyes. I am miles away from him at the moment so... that SHOULD help LOL

Best,

UnaMexicana

Lots of people jump out of planes in the USA. Although I'm also of the mind that I'm not jumping out of a perfectly good plane.

I think your husband might be a bit more of a thrill seeker than you are aware of.

[Darnell 8,478]

Some folk would view this as an excellent opportunity to purchase an 250,000 accidental death and dismemberment insurance policy.

Spouse's can do that, supposedly...

Sure, doesn't help the emotional loss, but $$ is useful !

[Caryh 5,206]

Some folk would view this as an excellent opportunity to purchase an 250,000 accidental death and dismemberment insurance policy.

Spouse's can do that, supposedly...

Sure, doesn't help the emotional loss, but $$ is useful !

Many of those policies have exclusions for things like jumping out of airplanes.

[UnaMexicana 153]

Many of those policies have exclusions for things like jumping out of airplanes.

Some folk would view this as an excellent opportunity to purchase an 250,000 accidental death and dismemberment insurance policy.

Spouse's can do that, supposedly...

Sure, doesn't help the emotional loss, but $$ is useful !

Oh my god that was mean.. and funny as hell LOL

Well I was blinded by emotion, but when I talked to my sister about it she asked:

- does he have any medical insurance at the moment? does that cover accidents?

- is this a good idea with the back problems that he has?

Seemed two perfectly valid arguments and they did not even cross my mind because I was so blinded by worries.

In the end, he said his brother can get the money back. Thank you all for your replies.

Best,

UnaMexicana