Nervous to Apply

[laurakay 0]

Hello all

A little bit about my fiance and I. We have known each other since Jan 3rd, 2011. We met on a Muslim matrimonial website. He proposed to me on my birthday, about 2 months later (muslims move fast lol). He first called my mother to ask permission, and then surprised me when he had roses delivered and he called and popped the question. He is a citizen of Afghanistan, but has been studying in malaysia since 2009, so we will be going through the malaysian consulate. I came here to Malaysia Jan 2nd, 2013 with the intent to marry. However Malaysia is very strict on that. It took about a month to get through the court system just for me to get the ok to marry (since I am female with no male muslim relative living in malaysia, I had to have a judge sign off saying he was allowing me to marry). So it was a sigh of relief. But then came surprise number 2. My fiance's university told him if he were to marry, it would nullify his contract for his scholarship. They would then cancel his visa and he would be forced to return home. So at that point, we realized we would not be able to marry here, ergo, we have to go the fiance visa route. We have rented a house together here, but as muslims it is not right to be together, so even though our names are both on the lease, he has been staying in the dorms at his university. I am going to return home in about two weeks to continue working.

Now for the possible road blocks...I have been married, twice before. The first I was 19, the marriage lasted 4 years. That ended due to severe physical/emotional abuse and adultery. The second, I was 24 and it was to a foreigner. I lived in his country for one year and brought him to the usa on a marriage visa file via DCF. However, as soon as he got to America he went crazy, and there is only so many times a girl can stand to be cheated on. I divorced him before his two year conditional period was up.

Now, I know how bad all this can sound and how it could paint a bad picture of me. But please do not judge me. I am human and I realize mistakes I have made and I have learned from them. That being said, I am very nervous that the USCIS, NVC, and Consulate will judge for that. I don't like the idea of a fiance visa, as I feel a marriage visa would much better attest to the reality of our relationship, but given the circumstances it just wasn't possible. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you so much in advance! Oh, and because people speak of age, I am 4 years older than him.

[slider100 8]

Laurakay,

I will be upfront and honest with you as I believe that is what you are looking for on here. These are the not the possible red flags, but RED flags will be raised right away:

a) You have been married twice.

b) You have already filed for someone via a DCF, that is the # 1 red flag.

c) He is a citizen of Afghanistan, so I believe you will need to file through Afghanistan. I don't think he can file in Malaysia. I know he is living there legally, on a student visa, but unfortunately when it comes to countries like Afghanistan, Pakistan, they want people to file from their original place of residence. I hope someone else on here can confirm this.

These are just a few things! You probably need a good immigration attorney!

Cheers,

KnR aka slider100

[laurakay 0]

Laurakay,

I will be upfront and honest with you as I believe that is what you are looking for on here. These are the not the possible red flags, but RED flags will be raised right away:

a) You have been married twice.

b) You have already filed for someone via a DCF, that is the # 1 red flag.

c) He is a citizen of Afghanistan, so I believe you will need to file through Afghanistan. I don't think he can file in Malaysia. I know he is living there legally, on a student visa, but unfortunately when it comes to countries like Afghanistan, Pakistan, they want people to file from their original place of residence. I hope someone else on here can confirm this.

These are just a few things! You probably need a good immigration attorney!

Cheers,

KnR aka slider100

*Correction, known each other since Jan 3rd, 2012, not 2011, typo.

Yeah, I was pretty sure they would be Huge red flags. Which I hate. I wish if I could just sit down with them and explain the past marriages. As far as going through his consulate in Afghanistan, how would he do that if he is not living there?

Another piece of info, he worked as a translator for the US Army and Nato and the person who will be his joint sponsor is a colonel in the US Army. Will this work to our advantage?

[Christian S 0]

Laurakay,

I will be upfront and honest with you as I believe that is what you are looking for on here. These are the not the possible red flags, but RED flags will be raised right away:

a) You have been married twice.

b) You have already filed for someone via a DCF, that is the # 1 red flag.

c) He is a citizen of Afghanistan, so I believe you will need to file through Afghanistan. I don't think he can file in Malaysia. I know he is living there legally, on a student visa, but unfortunately when it comes to countries like Afghanistan, Pakistan, they want people to file from their original place of residence. I hope someone else on here can confirm this.

These are just a few things! You probably need a good immigration attorney!

Cheers,

KnR aka slider100

I co sign this. It is possible

[laurakay 0]

I co sign this. It is possible

So it would be in our best interest to hire a lawyer then?

[Christian S 0]

So it would be in our best interest to hire a lawyer then?

You wanna be on the safe side so I would hire one in this situation but again it is up to you this is just our honest opinions.

[HawaiianCecil 31]

I have been married three ( yes, 3, times), my fiancee is 16 years my junior and we got approved today - love knows no boundaries! Stay strong, you don't need an attorney!

[laurakay 0]

I have been married three ( yes, 3, times), my fiancee is 16 years my junior and we got approved today - love knows no boundaries! Stay strong, you don't need an attorney!

Thank you! I'm trying to stay strong. I just get ashamed of my past at times, even though I know I did nothing wrong, but I know it does not look good to those who don't know the full story. I did contact an attorney today though and am awaiting their reply to see what they think my best course of action should be

[laurakay 0]

Well, the lawyer has not responded to my email. Should I take that as a hint? lol

[rm love dc 10]

I have been married three ( yes, 3, times), my fiancee is 16 years my junior and we got approved today - love knows no boundaries! Stay strong, you don't need an attorney!

congratulations!!!!

[Ippsy Pippsy 31]

When people rec attorneys here, they don't mean someone out of a phone book. This is federal stuff, so you can use anyone in the USA. If you think you need one, maybe look at immigrate2us (did i get that right?). That's the site for people needing waivers and all. Good luck!

[Kastrs 723]

Laurakay,

I will be upfront and honest with you as I believe that is what you are looking for on here. These are the not the possible red flags, but RED flags will be raised right away:

a) You have been married twice.

b) You have already filed for someone via a DCF, that is the # 1 red flag.

c) He is a citizen of Afghanistan, so I believe you will need to file through Afghanistan. I don't think he can file in Malaysia. I know he is living there legally, on a student visa, but unfortunately when it comes to countries like Afghanistan, Pakistan, they want people to file from their original place of residence. I hope someone else on here can confirm this.

These are just a few things! You probably need a good immigration attorney!

Cheers,

KnR aka slider100

Actually, as long as he is living legally in malasya then he can and should file using that as his consulate. For example my fiancé is Pakistani but living in the UAE, again legally. Therefore, Abu dhabi is the consulate that will process my case.

[Carie_Azan 35]

Actually, as long as he is living legally in malasya then he can and should file using that as his consulate. For example my fiancé is Pakistani but living in the UAE, again legally. Therefore, Abu dhabi is the consulate that will process my case.

TRUE ^^^ My Fiance is also in the UAE (Paki National) - we are also using Abu Dhabi American Embassy.