Divorced/Interview

[MaRaAl 1]

Hi... ill need some answers here...

If we get to the interview are they going to ask my fiance about my prior marriage???

i never talk about it because my fiance gets mad/jealous about it... i know im not in the interview phase yet but im afraid that could be bad for us

i just want him to be with me and our 3 month old baby girl and i dont want anything to stop it or delay it

what should i do??

[Que Saudade 284]

YES.. it will come up. It is a valid question and rightfully so. The whole bonafide relationship issue is about honesty and trust between the couple. This includes talking about past marriages. My wife was asked about my previous marriage in the interview. Did she know about it, how long ago was it, why we got divorced.... It was quite lengthy interrogation. But, we had discussed it very openly previously and it was no problem.

I am going to warn against the jealousy issue. Those types of issues typically do not get better..... OK enough said about that..!!!

Good Luck

[Olomi_811 130]

You and your fiance need to discuss why you divorced, your ex's name, and if you have children from that relationship. Your fiance needs to realize you had a life before them and get over it. If the 3 month old is with your fiance you may be subject to having your process prolonged if they request a paternity test.

[del-2-5-2014 1,339]

At the risk of offending Que Saudade I need to expand a little bit.

The issue of prior marriages is paramount at the interview, just search and read prior interviews.

Perhaps you and Mr. Jealousy can rehearse and practice the questions ahead of time.

[Andrea&Henry 311]

I'm my husband's second wife also. In my case, they didn't ask me anything about my husband's ex wife, but I guess I was lucky. Normally, they ask why they end up their marriage?, how many kids does he have? etc etc. I think they didn't ask me because my husband and her ex wife got divorce 7 years ago, only 2 1/2 years of marriage and no children. But maybe Im gonna be asked on my AOS interview...either way I need to know.

I know why he feels like that, is not easy for any woman/man to deal with your fiance's past or being the second wife/husband, but I knew I need to hear the whole story, not only for being prepare for my interview, but also, I think is very important to know who I was marrying with. And his past is part of who he is now.

My advice, as a second wife is, try to talk to him about your past relationship in a objective way, and that means try not to give her much details about your intimacy with your ex husband. Try also not to put yourself in a emotional way, cry, show yourself sad or angry because your fiance may think if something still bothers you, it's because you still care. Explain him why your relationship didn't work and all the things you want it to be different in this new marriage, in order to work.

Also explain him how important is for both of you, that he needs to have some knowledge of your past for the interview.This is very important if you have kids with your ex (If indeed you have children with him, trust me, he will be asked EVERYTHING about them and his dad)....Missing some important question may cause him a huge deniel on his visa app and you do'nt want that.

All of us, have a past more darker or lighter...and it's part of been commited to the person we love, to learn how to deal, and RESPECT, their past, present, and future...cause is a part of who we are now.

blessing

Andrea

Edited August 31, 2012 by Andrea&Henry

[Que Saudade 284]

At the risk of offending Que Saudade I need to expand a little bit.

The issue of prior marriages is paramount at the interview, just search and read prior interviews.

Perhaps you and Mr. Jealousy can rehearse and practice the questions ahead of time.

Oh no offense Gowon. You are correct with it is paramount. They do need to discuss it. Go over it. Whatever it takes to understand about that part of the significant others past life.

[KayDeeCee 4,893]

Hi... ill need some answers here...

If we get to the interview are they going to ask my fiance about my prior marriage???

i never talk about it because my fiance gets mad/jealous about it... i know im not in the interview phase yet but im afraid that could be bad for us

i just want him to be with me and our 3 month old baby girl and i dont want anything to stop it or delay it

what should i do??

You should be able to discuss anything, especially when going through immigration. The USC does not typically go in with the foreign fiance(e) as they are not allowed in the Juarez consulate. I have seen exceptions to this rule, but it is rare. They sometimes ask if the USC is present in Juarez with you just to see if they came for support, but they would not be in the interview with you. If he is the one going to the interview, then they may ask him about it. He needs to be able to answer anything they ask him, calmly and honestly. It would be silly for him to get denied a visa because he acts too jealous to have a healthy, mature discussion about your previous marriage.

They asked my husband about my previous marriage, things like his name, when it was, etc. They just wanted to see if he knew about it. One piece of the puzzle to deciding if we had a bona fide relationship. Anything that is in your case file is free game for them to ask about.

Edited August 31, 2012 by Jay-Kay

[MaRaAl 1]

Thank you so much for your answers!!