Wednesday thread

[Henia 11]

Hello and Esalaams all...

Hmm no Wednesday thread yet, and it is already 2pm (well here anyway)

ELHAMDULLAH the weather is starting to cool down... it has been over 90 degree everyday since I have...today seem to be about 75 with a nice breeze coming off the sea. Finally I am not sweating my bonnet off...

Yesterday I went to English speaking women's meeting I guess you could call it.. basically some American and English who living in Algerie with Algerian husband...very pleasant bunch. Elhamdullah I met them... they took me to Ain Benian, to the bazaar...hmmm Hmmm shoppers paradise... we walked around for hours and I bought so much stuff... but elhamdullah I bought things i need here...

Today, I am bored...not much to do... all the cooking is done, as well as the cleaning. I need to iron 2 shirts still and sew some buttons on, which I am feeling too lazy today.

Later on today, i will have the big "Our future together" talk with my husband... so basically our decision to stay in DZ or go to the USA to live... he told me in the morning if we stay he wants to build a house...hmm we will see... after my day at the bazaar and seeing the homes of these ladies...I am thinking Algerie can definetly have many many possiblities for a VERY good life. Hmmm if liquidate all my assets in the States, which there is not much... here it is a small fortune... hmmmm anyone have any ideas?

[UmmSqueakster 54]

Hey all,

Well, my husband has been here a year. It definately hasn't gone the way we thought it would, but at least we're together

I'm bummed out here though. Last Friday, my uncle was diagnosed with colon cancer. He had surgery yesterday and they found that it's stage IV, basically all over. Outlook is not good. My dad isn't taking it well, and we're worried, since someone heard that this is a disease that runs in the family.

I don't deal with illness or death well. A few of my parents' friends died when I was younger, but no one I knew got really really sick and died until 3 years ago, when my grandfather passed away. Since then, my grandmother died, but she had been sick for a long time. With my uncle, he's still relatively young, in his early 50s. *sigh*

[doodlebug 3]

Well I woke up to a phonecall at 4:30am. Usama's father passed away 1/2 hour before he called me.

He was in tears and I could barely make out what he was saying. I feel so very helpless here and wish I could fly there right now to help him out. To make matters worse the place where he, his father and his sisters have been living for many years is being ordered to be knocked down by the gov't and they need to move in 3 days.

Not a good day.

[UmmSqueakster 54]

doodle, just be there for him whenever he needs it. If you can call him on the phone for awhile, it would help (I know it's expensive, but if you get skype, it's a little cheaper than calling from your landline).

[noura 0]

I'm so sorry for you both & your families both Rahma & Doodlebug.... what sad news

As for Henia, if I had the means, I would love to move to Morocco. I just can't do it right now.... so, inch'allah, I am hoping we may retire there in the not-too-distant future. Life would certainly be different and in some ways challenging, but lovely and peaceful overall. Both of our parents are elderly, so I hate that either of us have to leave them now. My only comfort is that Said's sisters live there w/ the family. I am the closest one here and probably the one who will be responsible mostly for their physical care in the event they get ill.

My prayers go out to your families Rahma & Doodle.... May Allah have mercy on them and give them peace.

Noura

[Together4ever 1]

Well, so much for controlling my tears at work. I'm so sorry for both of you, Rahma and Doodlebug. Hugs and prayers to both of you and your families. News like this is so hard to take, but there is a better place then this.

Henia, we actually plan to "retire" to Egypt one day. For now, if he ever gets the @#@*ing visa, we will make our life here and save for that day. We're both extremely content with that idea.

[UmmSqueakster 54]

Our plans are to eventually move to the ME, but I'm a spoiled american and I am insisting that we be financially stable when we go, and that my husband have a good job all lined up. We're thinking of Egypt or the UAE.

Henia, I can't remember if you've got your citizenship yet or not, but definately definately definately get that before you go. It can be uber helpful in getting a job and how you're treated by the governments there.

[Henia 11]

Hey all,

Well, my husband has been here a year. It definately hasn't gone the way we thought it would, but at least we're together

I'm bummed out here though. Last Friday, my uncle was diagnosed with colon cancer. He had surgery yesterday and they found that it's stage IV, basically all over. Outlook is not good. My dad isn't taking it well, and we're worried, since someone heard that this is a disease that runs in the family.

I don't deal with illness or death well. A few of my parents' friends died when I was younger, but no one I knew got really really sick and died until 3 years ago, when my grandfather passed away. Since then, my grandmother died, but she had been sick for a long time. With my uncle, he's still relatively young, in his early 50s. *sigh*

I will pray for your uncle inchallah

Well I woke up to a phonecall at 4:30am. Usama's father passed away 1/2 hour before he called me.

He was in tears and I could barely make out what he was saying. I feel so very helpless here and wish I could fly there right now to help him out. To make matters worse the place where he, his father and his sisters have been living for many years is being ordered to be knocked down by the gov't and they need to move in 3 days.

Not a good day.

Inna Lillahi Wa Inna Ilahi Rajiún (We are from Allah and to whom we return)

[Henia 11]

Our plans are to eventually move to the ME, but I'm a spoiled american and I am insisting that we be financially stable when we go, and that my husband have a good job all lined up. We're thinking of Egypt or the UAE.

Henia, I can't remember if you've got your citizenship yet or not, but definately definately definately get that before you go. It can be uber helpful in getting a job and how you're treated by the governments there.

No, Rahma I donnot have my citizenship yet... still waiting for the N400 to get approved Well my visa expired on Nov 6 and also my return ticket is for Nov 6, so unfortunately I am returning. Since being here, I have come to realise what peace and happiness is... so it is my every goal to return and live in Algerie. Once I get that N400 approval (US citizenship) of course... we will have our *big* talk tonight. We both did salaat al-istakara and will discuss our thought and try to come to a conclusion/decision. For my side I have 4 issues: 1, my US citizenship 2, my daughter's welfare/education 3, moving to better home (with running water, a toliet, a bathub and washing machine inchallah) 4, my ex letting me take my daughter out of the country I want move here permanetly and I am pretty sure my husband would rather live here also... as he does have a extremely good job here, and if he were to come to the US I know he would struggle with the pride thing when he cannot find a job. Personally, I even though it is my right to be maintained financially I would have no problem supporting my family if needed. My husband has expressed his feeling on this: NO! I will support my family. I will not have my wife support me. I tried to reason with him, but in the end I gave up... his pride is larger then his logic I think.

In the short time I have been here I solved or rather found the solutions to all my problems I had faced in the US and also the issues I had here... 1, I can practise my deen here without any concern or fear for myself/my daughter 2, my stress is gone ( I can actually sleep more then 3 hours) 3, I love my husband and his husband (and esp since I donnot have a family other then my daughter...it is a blessing for me (elhamdullah) 4, I can live the same, if not better life here, then in the states...(meaning much more material things are obtainable here) .... But unfortunately I have to go back, kinda restart my life...as i had to quit my job and give up my apartment... but inchallah soon real soon I will return... I am thinking before the winter is over. And you know what, after joining this board, hearing all the stories (esp Holly's DCFs story) I am convinced by the mercy and blessings of Allah, if we later on decide to want to live in the States...I am sure there will be no problems with that.

All your comments, questions and concerns are very much appreciated ladies, as i know all of you have good intentions and are *going through* the same thing I am... just trying to with our loved ones.

[Mrs. Forgetful 2]

Well I spilt extremely hot pumpkin soup on my arm last night. It's all red and blistering now, but I guess it's not to bad. I just got back from my doctor appointment. All is well, but she started me on this medicine that is supposed to reduce the amount of migraines I get. She also told me not to fast the next few days. So yeah that's the news. I am at home now, but I have to go to work in an hour. I think I am going to take a little nappy nap. Hope everyone has a good day.

[ya falaha! 0]

I'm so sorry to hear of your sad news Rahma and Doodle. I pray that Allah shows them mercy.

Henia...I know exactly how you feel about the stress being gone in Algerie. I felt that way in Egypt. I could actually sleep through the night without waking several times. I slept like a rock there. We plan on moving there when my sons are grown inshallah. I'm not sure how I feel about that.

Well yesterday I survived my first Ramadan migraine alhamdulillah. I got it about 4pm. I still had 3.5 hrs left to fast and I wasn't gonna break it that late in the game. I finished work at 5:30pm, went home and laid down until it was time to break my fast. Alhamdulillah after 800mg of Motrin and some coffee I felt better. I still have a little headache left over from yesterday.

I had a rather serious talk with my husband last night. I believe I have left over issues from my previous marriage that I'm bringing into this one. I'm taking a few days to deal with it. I feel I need a little space from Mohamed to come to terms with this and deal with it before it becomes a problem with us.

So it seems we're all having a rip roaring Wednesday

Edited October 4, 2006 by moody

[Jenn! 918]

My condolences to rahma and doodlebug.

[jordanianprincess 0]

For now, if he ever gets the @#@*ing visa, we will make our life here and save for that day.

Potty Mouth **runs and hides**

Side note - My condolences to Doodle, May God be with Usama and his family in this difficult time, Allah Yr7amo (God have mercy on his soul)

Rahma, I know exactly how you feel. I lost my uncle to Colon Cancer 5 years ago, he was only 56. Same as in your situation, we found out too late when it was in the final stages. It was a very diffucult time for my family, May God Bless him and be with your family.

[UmmSqueakster 54]

Thanks everyone for the thoughts and prayers. My uncle is awake and watching the twins game right now. I thought about going in his honor (the dome is a mile from where I work), but couldn't get any tickets. Ah well.

[sarah and hicham 3]

Rahma and doodle I'm really sorry to hear this news. I don't really have any advice it's just difficult but I will keep you guys in my thoughts.

Otherwise nothing going on here today,

Sarah