Self harming and GP's letter

[ginge 0]

Hi guys.

I've been freaking out about this issue since January and have finally decided

to pluck up the courage to ask for some help.

I self harmed in July of last year, about a month after leaving my new husband behind in the States.

I found myself getting so distressed and irrational that we ended up arguing, and, being in the state I was,

my messed up mind decided that that must be it and we were over. It was then that I cut myself.

It took time for us to recover, and for me to come to terms with our separation, and so I sought help from my GP.

I was put back on antidepressants and referred for CBT. I spoke to a man over the phone, and,

because of the waiting times to see a one-to-one therapist, he recommended that I go for group therapy.

I told him I wasn't comfortable with that and I never heard from him again. After a couple of weeks I took myself

off the medication as I was feeling worse than I had been in the first place. Not long after I started feeling much better.

Looking back I realise I was just distraught at being parted from my husband and at having no idea when I would see him

again.

In January I started reading up on requirements for the visa.

The medical stuff really messed with my head. I know I will have to disclose the self harming and history of depression.

That isn't even in question. I asked for, and got, a letter from my doctor. After reading the letter I'm now freaking out

again as I don't think it's going to help at all. So, I have decided to put it on here and see what people make of it.

I hope you don't mind.

So here it is:

----- has a past history of depression and has previously been treated

with anti-depressants and has been seen by psychiatrists. She has been regularly seen by GP's

in the practise over the past few years for problems with anxiety and depression. However,

she has not had any anti-depressants prescribed since September 2010. She claims that she is now

feeling a lot more stable and settled and is keen to move to America to join her husband.

She has not reported any symptoms of anxiety or depression since I have been seeing her from March of 2011.

She shows no current sign of being at risk to herself or to others.

My problem with it is, she has not mentioned the self-harming incident, and I don't want to have to take this letter

to the medical panel, only for them to need another letter about that incident.

I have other concerns regarding the tone of the letter. Some of the wording seems a bit negative to me.

I realise I am obviously very close to the issue, so it could be that I am reading too much into it. However, I showed it to my father

and he was unsure of it too.

I'd be grateful to get a fresh, unbiased perspective on this.

Thanks in advance, G.

[Maeve 2]

I don't know much about the medical requirements, but I'd guess that the "not a danger to yourself or others" is a good thing to have in there; that's a buzzword that gets thrown about a lot. Also, it does give the impression that your condition has improved - not needing anti-depressants and not reporting any major episodes for a while - which is also something they might look for. Its possible they might not even ask, but good to have a letter from your doctor than nothing at all...

Sorry I'm not of too much help, but I have SI'd off and on for the past 10 years or so, so I've been pretty well involved with the mental health field for quite a while Glad to hear that you haven't done anything in a while tho! I know how hard that is, especially when you're apart from your husband!! *hugs*

Also a good resource for SI support: http://buslist.org/phpBB/

[Operator 1,927]

Hi ginge,

Good for you getting it out in the open to deal with. My unbiased perspective of what you have presented is a statement of fact and opinion from the doctor. The opinion being "She shows no current sign of being at risk to herself or to others". I don't read anything negative in this at all.

Separation from a loved one can be intensely stressful as everyone here will attest to. Hang in there, get healthy and continue on with your journey.

Good luck!

[catracha85 6]

Sorry to ask, but who is the petitioner??

Anyways, I had similar case like yours. My husband had a lot of medical issues and because of this we expedite our case, which make all the process easier thanks God.

I remember that when I read the letter that his doctor wrote for us to send to the NVC; I told him, Do you really have all this? cuz I didnt understand all those medical words and weird illness that he have. Dont be frighten to send it, they will think that you need your husband by your side to help you with your depression.

[JoannaV 174]

I see what you mean about the tone of the letter, that is, "She claims that she is now feeling a lot more stable and settled", is that "she claims" something that you didn't like? I think though that you needn't worry about it. As far as that particular sentence goes (which was the one that hit me), it's actually totally factually true. When it comes to mental health, or even physical pain, what the patient says is what it's all based on anyway. The doctor could've chosen better phrasing, but she is a doctor not an English teacher :-) The whole letter makes it clear that you show absolutely no indication of any current problems. So, a good letter.

Don't worry too much about what the letter does or does not include. If you go to the medical and they say that you need a new letter addressing a specific incident, then so be it. They will tell you exactly what they need from your doctor and your doctor can provide it then. The really positive thing is that you already know now that your doctor will be able to give you a new letter if needed. (Some people have trouble getting letters from their doctors, so it's great that you know for sure she can provide such a thing!)

Just focus on the other things you have to do for immigration :-)

[Darnell 8,478]

send a pm to hamtaro - she had similar issues, went through much stuff, got approved, and is in the usa. (from UK)

[Idaho RN 1]

I am a registered nurse and the letter from your physician looks like a normal doctor written letter. The word "claims" is used to describe what the doctor heard you say. It is not a negative statement. It really is the same as the doctor writing, "Pt hit her head on a door and now claims she is experiencing dizziness and blurred vision."

It does not mean you say one thing but they see it differently.

Don't sweat the letter. It is the way doctors write.

Good luck