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Kathryn41

Some Canadian Humour

By Kathryn41 in Canada

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Kathryn41 Grand Master

Kathryn41   3,205

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Canada
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Posted

Two American tourists were driving through Nova Scotia.

As they were approaching Shubenacadie (shoe-been-aack-id-dee),

they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town's name.

They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch.

As they stood at the counter, one tourist asked the employee,

"Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us?

Would you please pronounce where we are... ver-r-ry slo-o-owly?"

The waitress leaned over the counter and says:

"Tiiimmmmm Hoorrrrttoooonnns..."

“...Isn't it splendid to think of all the things there are to find out about? It just makes me feel glad to be alive--it's such an interesting world. It wouldn't be half so interesting if we knew all about everything, would it? There'd be no scope for imagination then, would there?”

.― Lucy Maude Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables

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OBX   51

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Canada
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Posted

rofl.gif

My first chuckle of the day. Thanks Kathryn.

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Barbara J Proficient

Barbara J   115

Posted
Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Australia
 Timeline
Posted

Two American tourists were driving through Nova Scotia.

As they were approaching Shubenacadie (shoe-been-aack-id-dee),

they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town's name.

They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch.

As they stood at the counter, one tourist asked the employee,

"Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us?

Would you please pronounce where we are... ver-r-ry slo-o-owly?"

The waitress leaned over the counter and says:

"Tiiimmmmm Hoorrrrttoooonnns..."

AAHHh TY that was brilliant :thumbs::rofl:

Divorced !st November 2012.

Married only 2 years 1 month

JeannieL Proficient

JeannieL   44

Posted
Filed: Lift. Cond. (apr) Country: Canada
 Timeline
Posted

Too cute.....I live about 15 minutes from Shubenacadie...There is no Tim Horton's there but there is in the next town called Stewiacke....Stewyak. I will be sure to pass that joke on...Thanks!

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Inky Grand Master

Inky   1,111

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Canada
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Posted

I have a good joke but it comes from a real story.

2 American young men in their late 20tys really wanted to go do Sydney Australia. They saved up and bought their tickets to Sydney. Once they arrived they couldn't figure out why there was snow EVERYWHERE. Also couldn't figure out what was with the really odd " accent ". They went to the front check-ins at the airport and found out...

They didn't buy tickets to Sydney Australia... they bought tickets to Sydney, Nova Scotia. Neither of them bothered to check the E-tickets they ordered and didn't know there was a Sydney in Canada. Regardless of the HUGE flub, they had a great visit in NS and decided they would be going back again for more trips.

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RICARDO4EVA2   194

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rofl.gif wouldn't doubt it

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Kathryn41 Grand Master

Kathryn41   3,205

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Canada
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Posted

I have a good joke but it comes from a real story.

2 American young men in their late 20tys really wanted to go do Sydney Australia. They saved up and bought their tickets to Sydney. Once they arrived they couldn't figure out why there was snow EVERYWHERE. Also couldn't figure out what was with the really odd " accent ". They went to the front check-ins at the airport and found out...

They didn't buy tickets to Sydney Australia... they bought tickets to Sydney, Nova Scotia. Neither of them bothered to check the E-tickets they ordered and didn't know there was a Sydney in Canada. Regardless of the HUGE flub, they had a great visit in NS and decided they would be going back again for more trips.

LOL - :rofl: :rofl: That is priceless!

Actually, it reminds me of one time I was flying down to visit my then fiancee. I was checking in at the counter and the guy in front of me was having a real argument with the agent. He was trying to book in for his 6:35 flight and she kept telling him he wasn't listed and the flight was full. Finally, he pulled out the documentation from his travel agent and discovered he was booked on the 6:35 am flight - and it was now pm. No idea what happened as my turn at the counter came up.

“...Isn't it splendid to think of all the things there are to find out about? It just makes me feel glad to be alive--it's such an interesting world. It wouldn't be half so interesting if we knew all about everything, would it? There'd be no scope for imagination then, would there?”

.― Lucy Maude Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables

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CanadaLove   16

Posted
Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Canada
 Timeline
Posted
:lol: Those jokes were awesome.

Holding my nose and jumping off the cliff.. hope I don't hit any rocks in the water.

"All I want out of life is ice cream and cuddles. Is it too much to ask? Is it?" - Sleep Talkin' Man

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Allie Rising Star

Allie   5

Posted
Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Canada
 Timeline
Posted

I have a good joke but it comes from a real story.

2 American young men in their late 20tys really wanted to go do Sydney Australia. They saved up and bought their tickets to Sydney. Once they arrived they couldn't figure out why there was snow EVERYWHERE. Also couldn't figure out what was with the really odd " accent ". They went to the front check-ins at the airport and found out...

They didn't buy tickets to Sydney Australia... they bought tickets to Sydney, Nova Scotia. Neither of them bothered to check the E-tickets they ordered and didn't know there was a Sydney in Canada. Regardless of the HUGE flub, they had a great visit in NS and decided they would be going back again for more trips.

I am from Sydney N.S. and this has happened many times. Just in the past 2 years there have been 3 instances where people thought they were going to Sydney Australia only to land in Sydney on Cape Breton Island.

They were all put up for free at a local hotel and shown Cape Breton's Celtic hospitality. Upon leaving they all say they will be returning to the Island

Allie Rising Star

Allie   5

Posted
Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Canada
 Timeline
Posted

A Little Canadian Humor Forget Rednecks, here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about Canucks

If your local Dairy Queen is closedfrom Septemberthrough May, you may live in Canada.

If someone in a Home Depot store offersyou assistanceand they don't work there, you may live in Canada.

If you've worn shorts and a parka at thesame time,you may live in Canada

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversationwithsomeone who dialed a wrong number, you maylive in Canada

If 'Vacation'means going anywhere south of Muncie forthe weekend, you may live in Canada.

If you measure distance in hours, you maylive in Canada

If you know several people who have hit adeer morethan once, you may live in Canada

If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C'in the sameday and back again, you may live in Canada

If you can drive 90 kms/hr through 2 feetof snowduring a raging blizzard without flinching,you may live in Canada

If you install security lights on yourhouse andgarage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Canada

If you carry jumpers in your car andyour wife knows how to use them, you may live in Canada

If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit,you may live in Canada

If the speed limit on the highway is 80km-- you're going 90 and everybody is passing you, you may live in Canada

If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you may livein Canada

If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter,winter,still winter and road construction, you may live in Canada

If you have more miles on your snow blower than yourcar, you may live in Canada.

If you find 2 degrees 'a little chilly',you may livein Canada

If you actually understand these jokes,and forward them to all your Canadian friends & others,you definitely live inCanada

Sorry a lot of the words run together. I didn't proof read just cut and pasted

Read slowly and you'll figure them out lol,lol

Kathryn41 Grand Master

Kathryn41   3,205

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Canada
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Posted

LOL thanks - I really remember having to design Hallowe'en costumes to fit over snowsuits or winter clothes ,hehehe!

“...Isn't it splendid to think of all the things there are to find out about? It just makes me feel glad to be alive--it's such an interesting world. It wouldn't be half so interesting if we knew all about everything, would it? There'd be no scope for imagination then, would there?”

.― Lucy Maude Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables

5892822976_477b1a77f7_z.jpg

Another Member of the VJ Fluffy Kitty Posse!

CanadaLove Community Regular

CanadaLove   16

Posted
Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Canada
 Timeline
Posted
:lol: My husband's uncle has 'winter shorts' and 'summer shorts'..

Holding my nose and jumping off the cliff.. hope I don't hit any rocks in the water.

"All I want out of life is ice cream and cuddles. Is it too much to ask? Is it?" - Sleep Talkin' Man

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

WithoutMusic-theidolhands.pngSquareOneIcon.pngMYV2avaruusvirta.pngCarmenSandiego-theidolhands.pngSuckIt-stellans.jpg

138 days from NOA1 - NOA2

14 days from CIS till NVC case number assigned.

coraliesolms Rising Star

coraliesolms   47

Posted
Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: South Africa
 Timeline
Posted
:rofl: I read a book when I first moved to Canada.. for the life of me I cant remember what it is called.. I think its "the tourists guide to Canada"..and I just ROLLED laughing. Its a good book for anyone looking for a laugh. It compared Calgarians to hamsters because of all the +15's connecting all the buildings downtown. I did enjoy it.

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Out of the night that covers me,

Black as the Pit from pole to pole,

I thank whatever gods may be

For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance

I have not winced nor cried aloud.

Under the bludgeonings of chance

My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears

Looms but the Horror of the shade,

And yet the menace of the years

Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,

How charged with punishments the scroll.

I am the master of my fate:

I am the captain of my soul.

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Ontarkie Grand Master

Ontarkie   14,275

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Canada
 Timeline
Posted

A Little Canadian Humor Forget Rednecks, here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about Canucks

If your local Dairy Queen is closedfrom Septemberthrough May, you may live in Canada.

If someone in a Home Depot store offersyou assistanceand they don't work there, you may live in Canada.

If you've worn shorts and a parka at thesame time,you may live in Canada

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversationwithsomeone who dialed a wrong number, you maylive in Canada

If 'Vacation'means going anywhere south of Muncie forthe weekend, you may live in Canada.

If you measure distance in hours, you maylive in Canada

If you know several people who have hit adeer morethan once, you may live in Canada

If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C'in the sameday and back again, you may live in Canada

If you can drive 90 kms/hr through 2 feetof snowduring a raging blizzard without flinching,you may live in Canada

If you install security lights on yourhouse andgarage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Canada

If you carry jumpers in your car andyour wife knows how to use them, you may live in Canada

If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit,you may live in Canada

If the speed limit on the highway is 80km-- you're going 90 and everybody is passing you, you may live in Canada

If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you may livein Canada

If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter,winter,still winter and road construction, you may live in Canada

If you have more miles on your snow blower than yourcar, you may live in Canada.

If you find 2 degrees 'a little chilly',you may livein Canada

If you actually understand these jokes,and forward them to all your Canadian friends & others,you definitely live inCanada

Sorry a lot of the words run together. I didn't proof read just cut and pasted

Read slowly and you'll figure them out lol,lol

This just cracks me up its so true, I can't for the life of me figure out distance unless I'm told how long in mins/hours. I'm going to post this on fb for kicks lol

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