Wife and Ex-GF Situation?Please Help

[BrownHorse 2]

Hi all,

I have recently married to a wonderful lady through an arriange marriage and I love her more than anything in this world. However,I also have a girl freind who I love to death and can't live without her.Me and my GF have been together for well over a year now and do not have a kid yet(Thank you god)! Initially it was all hunky dorky with 4 times a week and then it dwindled to twice a week. For the past 4 months it has been spotty (may be once a month). Then after the marriage, I returned to the STates and decided to Visit my GF as I was missing my wife so much and just needed something*.Over the weekend I dug out some xx rated magazines hidden in her bedroom closet under Her clothes stack.I was so shocked and couldnt belive what my eyes saw.Last Sunday I told her that I was going to Shopping Center and she was busy with watching Soaps on TV. I drove out of her apartment complex and suddenly realized that I had forgotten my coupons so I returned and what do i see, my girlfreind had one of my best buddies invited to her apartment n doing their thing(i dunno even know how to put this, its so embarrasing). I was shell shocked and she behaved as if nothing happened!! I am disgusted, frustrated and very unhappy. I was not expecting this. I am worried.S,hould we go for counceling? What seems to be wrong with her? I am a very good looking, slim, easy going hardworking guy. I work out everyday and also used to cook her good meals. People, please help me save our relationship.I know i m already married but I still want my GF/EX-GF whatever you want to call, to be a part of my life. I cant see having another man in her life.

I do not know if this is the beginning or something she has been doing all the time in my absence. I am trying to recollect her behavior in the last 6 months or so. Could our souring relationship be because of her new habits orshould i suspect another man in her life? I am very much worried.

[vartan 0]

sorry you are here on a family visa based forum .. and we love our SO .. so you sir don't deserve your wife if you have a gf on the side.. I will give you no support or advice.

[BrownHorse 2]

sorry you are here on a family visa based forum .. and we love our SO .. so you sir don't deserve your wife if you have a gf on the side.. I will give you no support or advice.

LMAOF ! gOOD ONE !!

[JenT 0]

You are on the wrong forum.

Jen

[slim 1,514]

It's almost humorous that you ask "should I go to counseling with my girlfriend"?

I don't know.... maybe you should ask your wife!

Seriously though, you're not going to get anything on this forum but people telling you that it's wrong what you're doing, you shouldn't have two women, etc., etc., etc. Now, that said, I understand that arranged marriages and marriage in general in countries like India is not the tradional type of marriage that we have here in the States. So, what you need to do is sit down with your girlfriend and talk to her about the entire situation to see why she would be with this other guy, and what it is that you're not doing for her. (I think maybe the fact that you have a wife may have something to do with it. Women have this thing about not wanting to be "2nd best" and will do whatever they can to find a man that will make them "first choice.") Then you should really sit down and evaluate whether or not you still want this girlfriend in your life too. Obviously you do now, but maybe after you guys really talk about the nature of your relationship, maybe you'll see that it's better in the long run for you to let her go.

I don't know. This is a very interesting situation. If you turn on the Lifetime Channel, there are lots of shows just like this on every day. Maybe watching a few of those will help you decide what you should do. Good luck!

Edited August 6, 2006 by slim

[desert_fox 32]

man...dont be so sensative....Im sure she will get over it and that the wife will understand.

[JenT 0]

It's almost humorous that you ask "should I go to counseling with my girlfriend"?

I don't know.... maybe you should ask your wife!

Seriously though, you're not going to get anything on this forum but people telling you that it's wrong what you're doing, you shouldn't have two women, etc., etc., etc. Now, that said, I understand that arranged marriages and marriage in general in countries like India is not the tradional type of marriage that we have here in the States. So, what you need to do is sit down with your girlfriend and talk to her about the entire situation to see why she would be with this other guy, and what it is that you're not doing for her. (I think maybe the fact that you have a wife may have something to do with it. Women have this thing about not wanting to be "2nd best" and will do whatever they can to find a man that will make them "first choice.") Then you should really sit down and evaluate whether or not you still want this girlfriend in your life too. Obviously you do now, but maybe after you guys really talk about the nature of your relationship, maybe you'll see that it's better in the long run for you to let her go.

I don't know. This is a very interesting situation. If you turn on the Lifetime Channel, there are lots of shows just like this on every day. Maybe watching a few of those will help you decide what you should do. Good luck!

Start with Jerry Springer. There's all kinds of good advice offered there.

[BrownHorse 2]

People calm down !!! I dont have any girl freind. I wanted to come up with a hot topic and fire some women's brain here and kill some time. I m missing my wife so much as we haven't spoken in like a week . its killing meeeeee !!!!

18 Hits and 7 Replies already..

Edited August 6, 2006 by BrownHorse

[vartan 0]

People calm down !!! I dont have any girl freind. I wanted to come up with a hot topic and fire some women's brain here and kill some time. I m missing my wife so much as we haven't spoken in like a week . its killing meeeeee !!!!

[Mina76 0]

Lucky for you that it was not a real situation as I was to curse you out just now!!!

I'am against men doing this kind of thing to their wives!

[Buttons 0]

I thought it sounded fishy. I hope your telling the truth if not you are a sick sick man.

[BrownHorse 2]

Lucky for you that it was not a real situation as I was to curse you out just now!!!

I'am against men doing this kind of thing to their wives!

lol. i m glad you aint my wife. i would be dead on the ground by now. j/k. NO way, I wud never ever leave my wife until the last breathe of my life. I love herrrrrr demm ittt !!

[JenT 0]

That's not a subject that's even something to joke about here. I wonder what your wife would say if she came across this post. Very immature.

[giraffemd 0]

Lucky for you that it was not a real situation as I was to curse you out just now!!!

I'am against men doing this kind of thing to their wives!

lol. i m glad you aint my wife. i would be dead on the ground by now. j/k. NO way, I wud never ever leave my wife until the last breathe of my life. I love herrrrrr demm ittt !!

hmmmm you have an uncanny resemblance to your avatar!!!!!!

[JenT 0]

Why don't you pass the time by writing a love letter to your wife, since you love herrrrr so much demm ittt, instead of writing trash just to flame the board?