Divorce one year into conditional 2 year green card

[Cassielane 0]

Hello,

I am a US citizen that would like to divorce my husband. We married 2 years ago in Jordan. He arrived in the US 1 year ago and is 1 year into his 2 year conditional green card. Unfortunately he has changed so much since coming here that I just don't love him the way I once did. I would like to divorce him and move on with my life, but he is a good man and is settled here with a good job. My concern is that I am 51 and he is 26. Our marriage was/is real and we have plenty of documentation to prove that we were very much a couple. 3 trips to Jordan the year before he moved here, joint accounts, utility bills etc. If I leave him now would he have to return to Syria? Is it best for me to stay with him until his 10 year card comes in? I'd like to move on as soon as possible (I'm not getting any younger!), but I don't want to hurt him anymore than I already will.

Thanks for any advise you can give me

Edited April 12, 2010 by Cassielane

[Created 6]

Hello,

I am a US citizen that would like to divorce my husband. We married 2 years ago in Jordan. He arrived in the US 1 year ago and is 1 year into his 2 year conditional green card. Unfortunately he has changed so much since coming here that I just don't love him the way I once did. I would like to divorce him and move on with my life, but he is a good man and is settled here with a good job. My concern is that I am 51 and he is 26. Our marriage was/is real and we have plenty of documentation to prove that we were very much a couple. 3 trips to Jordan the year before he moved here, joint accounts, utility bills etc. If I leave him now would he have to return to Syria? Is it best for me to stay with him until his 10 year card comes in? I'd like to move on as soon as possible (I'm not getting any younger!), but I don't want to hurt him anymore than I already will.

Thanks for any advise you can give me

This is my view..........cause you asked for it.

If you love him that much, why aren't you having this conversation with him........marriage is about joy and pain surely you should both be mature enough to realise that. It seems to me (again, because you asked), that you love him so much you are making all the decisions, will your love not tolerate a discussion with him about his future? Is your heart not large enough for counseling in the hope that you may both make adjustments and try to rekindle what you once felt. You are making alot of life changing deicisons for someone you loved enough to marry and at one point wanted to spend your life with. Marriage is not like candy that you throw away when the flavor changes.............I'm no authority on the matter.......just my view.

Edited April 12, 2010 by RMHurd

[Cassielane 0]

This is my view..........cause you asked for it.

If you love him that much, why aren't you having this conversation with him........marriage is about joy and pain surely you should both be mature enough to realise that. It seems to me (again, because you asked), that you love him so much you are making all the decisions, will your love not tolerate a discussion with him about his future? Is your heart not large enough for counseling in the hope that you may both make adjustments and try to rekindle what you once felt. You are making alot of life changing deicisons for someone you loved enough to marry and at one point wanted to spend your life with. Marriage is not like candy that you throw away when the flavor changes.............I'm no authority on the matter.......just my view.

Thank you for your reply, but I didn't ask for your view I asked a technical/legal question which you obviously do not know the answer to. I'll reserve judgement of me to my God. Of course we have discussed the matter and he knows why I don't feel the way I do for him anymore. And many of his actions are much to blame for my lack of feelings for him now. He didn't understand the imigration process when he came here and he still doesn't understand the process, hence the reason I am 'making all the decisions'. If there is anyone out there that can answer my question instead of passing judgement on me not knowing my cirumstances I would appreciate it.

Thanks

[milimelo 4,199]

You can divorce and he can file I-751 for removal of conditions based on marriage that was in good faith but ended in divorce.

What he will need to send in is the divorce decree, regular evidence for removal of conditions that shows co-mingling of finances - that he was on the lease, joint names on utility bills (or him paying some bills and you the others), joint bank accounts (or if individual proof that both were contributing to the household expenses), insurance cards (medical, auto, house...), designation of the other spouse as beneficiary for 401k, life insurance, wills (if you have them)...

Same address on drivers licenses, mail received at the same address (even if it is junk mail), postcards, letters from family to both of you...

If you're willing to write an affidavit for him confirming the marriage was in good faith but you ended up divorcing, that can help as well.

[Cassielane 0]

You can divorce and he can file I-751 for removal of conditions based on marriage that was in good faith but ended in divorce.

What he will need to send in is the divorce decree, regular evidence for removal of conditions that shows co-mingling of finances - that he was on the lease, joint names on utility bills (or him paying some bills and you the others), joint bank accounts (or if individual proof that both were contributing to the household expenses), insurance cards (medical, auto, house...), designation of the other spouse as beneficiary for 401k, life insurance, wills (if you have them)...

Same address on drivers licenses, mail received at the same address (even if it is junk mail), postcards, letters from family to both of you...

If you're willing to write an affidavit for him confirming the marriage was in good faith but you ended up divorcing, that can help as well.

Thank you so much for the information. Although he hasn't been the best husband, I do believe he is a good man. We have everything you wrote with the exception of the will which I hadn't gotten around to change. I would not mind writing at affidavit for him at all. I was more worried about the age difference making immigration think the marriage was a fraud, which it truly was not.

Thanks again for the info.

[raymaga 25]

Hope you can move on and start over. You will find happiness again when the time is right.

Best wishes.

[Brother Hesekiel 2,235]

While it is possible for a divorced immigrant to get the conditions of his residence removed and to receive an unrestricted, 10-year Green Card with a waiver, I do understand your concern regarding the age difference.

The general assumption is that age doesn't matter when it comes to love and partnership, yet it might carry some weight when it comes to a woman in her Fifties who married an immigrant in his Twenties and the marriage failed prematurely. This rather large age gap might not be a formal factor for the Immigration Officer when trying to judge whether it's a bona fide marriage or not, but it might be an underlying and influential factor nonetheless when figuring out whether or not to approve the applicant's petition.

Is it fair to even bring age into the equation? I don't really know, in most cases probably not. Generally speaking, people of different ages might very well be madly in love and live together in harmony until death takes them apart. Yet in real life, every case is different and has unique factors to consider, so in your husband's case it's important that he can firmly establish that your marriage was entered in good faith, and not in order to gain immigration benefits.

Playing devil's advocate, assuming an Immigration Officer is suspicious of fraudulent activity between the US citizen and the immigrant. Would you think that if one party, the US citizen, wrote a letter stating that their marriage was real, would carry much weight? What would carry more weight is an affidavit from a person outside your relationship, someone who can attest that he or she has experienced both of you as a loving couple.