How would you respond?

[one...two...tree 2,762]

Imagine that you have a teenager that made the high school basketball team. Your son/daughter goes to practice today and the coach calls them aside to tell them they've been cut from the team.

Your son/daughter later tells you they've been cut from the team. Which of the following responses would you most likely give?

1. You're getting yourself all worked up over nothing. The world isn't going to come to some end because you didn't make the team. Forget about it.

2. Life isn't always fair, but you have to learn how to roll with the punches.

3. Why do you think you were dropped? Were the other players better than you? What are you going to do now?

4. Try to see it from the coach's point of view. He wants to produce a winning team. It must have been tough for him to decide who to keep and who to let go.

5. Oh, you poor thing. I'm so sorry for you. You tried so hard to make the team, but you just weren't good enough. Now all the other kids know. I'll bet you could just die of embarrassment.

6. Did you ever consider that the real reason you were cut from the team was that your heart wasn't in your playing? I think that on a subconscious level you didn't want to be on the team, so you messed up on purpose.

or other response (please elaborate)

[luckytxn 2,265]

I would tell her that she definately got the genes from her mothers side of the family in sports anyway.

[Jenn! 918]

4

but why are they cutting midseason?

[one...two...tree 2,762]

4

but why are they cutting midseason?

I could see myself saying 3 or 4.

This is a hypothetical situation and has no basis in real life.

[GabiandVi 34]

Response 3 sounds about right, depending on delivery of course.

[The_Dude 1,142]

I think a bit more information would shape my response. Is this a cut in the middle of the season, or still during the trial period?

[SunDrop 59]

A combination of 2, 3 and 4.

Something along the lines of 'I'm sorry, you must be disappointed and it probably doesn't seem very fair. I'm sure the coach is trying to put together a winning team, did he mention anything about why you were cut?

[Peikko 1,575]

I'm more in the 1/2 category.

[one...two...tree 2,762]

I think a bit more information would shape my response. Is this a cut in the middle of the season, or still during the trial period?

For the sake of the argument, still during the trial period.

[Otto 83]

#2

[luckytxn 2,265]

For the sake of the argument, still during the trial period.

But you said that they MADE the team then got cut. You only make the team after the trial period.

[SMOKE 1,426]

none of the above.

i won't let my kids play team sports. unless you count wrestling, boxing, fencing, tennis, golf, track, swimming...etc..any 'team sport' that when you perform you are alone 1-1 & your score adds to the team total. team sports create a false sense that others will make up for your short comings. & lets be honest, when you fall short the list of people coming to your aid is a very short list.

Edited February 1, 2010 by SMOKE

[Jenn! 918]

I don't like #2. What's unfair about not making a team when presumably you're not good enough?

[Peikko 1,575]

Yes, because learning how to work within a team isn't really necessary in normal every day life

Wouldn't a coach actually tell a dropped kid why they had been dropped in these circumstances anyway? I can't imagine a coach just saying, "go home, I've changed my mind."

[one...two...tree 2,762]

none of the above.

i won't let my kids play team sports. unless you count wrestling, boxing, fencing, tennis, golf, track...etc..any 'team sport' that when you perform you are alone 1-1 & your score adds to the team total. team sports create a false sense that others will make up for your short comings. & lets be honest, when you fall short the list of people coming to your aid is a very short list.

Seriously? Interesting perspective on the concept of teamwork.