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bradcanuck

Considering Abondoning it all

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Canada
Timeline

I have a good job and a decent lifestyle in the US. However my marriage has been deteriorating for some time now, on both partners ends. Lately every day has been a struggle to get through and I think we both know it's going to end.

That being said - I have questions regarding immigration.

If I decide to leave, what is the process? I am on a greencard and I can file for condition removal November 09. Do I send my card in and then just leave the country?

In the event I abandon the GC and in the future I want to come to the US am I treated as a non resident such as before I received the GC?

We both entered this in good faith but I'm learning we are just too young and I don't think we can do it any longer.

Any help and insight would be appreciated.


Current Status
July, 2011 - US Citizen

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Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Canada
Timeline
I have a good job and a decent lifestyle in the US. However my marriage has been deteriorating for some time now, on both partners ends. Lately every day has been a struggle to get through and I think we both know it's going to end.

That being said - I have questions regarding immigration.

If I decide to leave, what is the process? I am on a greencard and I can file for condition removal November 09. Do I send my card in and then just leave the country?

In the event I abandon the GC and in the future I want to come to the US am I treated as a non resident such as before I received the GC?

We both entered this in good faith but I'm learning we are just too young and I don't think we can do it any longer.

Any help and insight would be appreciated.

Hi Brad,

Well, i'm really sorry to hear this.

I don't know anything about turning in the greencard - I doubt you have to do anything - you won't apply to remove conditions and that will be the end of that. You will then be treated as a non-resident.

I wish you well :thumbs:

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Canada
Timeline

sorry to hear about all of this Brad... I'm sure it won't be easy no matter what road you choose emotionally.. all the best to you!

Edited by Emancipation

AOS:

2007-02-22: Sent AOS /EAD

2007-03-06 : NOA1 AOS /EAD

2007-03-28: Transferred to CSC

2007-05-17: EAD Card Production Ordered

2007-05-21: I485 Approved

2007-05-24: EAD Card Received

2007-06-01: Green Card Received!!

Removal of Conditions:

2009-02-27: Sent I-751

2009-03-07: NOA I-751

2009-03-31: Biometrics Appt. Hartford

2009-07-21: Touched (first time since biometrics) Perhaps address change?

2009-07-28: Approved at VSC

2009-08-25: Received card in the mail

Naturalization

2012-08-20: Submitted N-400

2013-01-18: Became Citizen

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: China
Timeline

Sad to hear.

Yes you can leave the country and give up LPR status,

You do not need to remove conditions since you are giving up the green-card.

Check with nearest consulate in Canada about filing an I-407 http://usagreencardcenter.com/de/all/forms/insform70.pdf

And YES in the future you would go through the immigrations process all over again.


OUR TIME LINE Please do a timeline it helps us all, thanks.

Is now a US Citizen immigration completed Jan 12, 2012.

1428954228.1592.1755425389.png

CHIN0001_zps9c01d045.gifCHIN0100_zps02549215.gifTAIW0001_zps9a9075f1.gifVIET0001_zps0a49d4a7.gif

Look here: A Candle for Love and China Family Visa Forums for Chinese/American relationship,

Visa issues, and lots of info about the Guangzhou and Hong Kong consulate.

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Filed: Timeline

I'm so sorry, Brad. (F) (F) (F)

Just a note on marriage...... the first few years are the roughest as we learn to live with one another. I can honestly say that there have been times when I have thought about returning home also. But I keep the thought that there has been a huge adjustment all around, and I am going to give it time and see where that leads us. I wish you well.


iagree.gif

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Canada
Timeline

Sorry to hear of your situation.

I wish you the best in your decision and hope that you can find happiness in the future.


"THE SHORT STORY"

KURT & RAYMA (K-1 Visa)

Oct. 9/03... I-129F sent to NSC

June 10/04... K-1 Interview - APPROVED!!!!

July 31/04... Entered U.S.

Aug. 28/04... WEDDING DAY!!!!

Aug. 30/04... I-485, I-765 & I-131 sent to Seattle

Dec. 10/04... AOS Interview - APPROVED!!!!! (Passport stamped)

Sept. 9/06... I-751 sent to NSC

May 15/07... 10-Yr. PR Card arrives in the mail

Sept. 13/07... N-400 sent to NSC

Aug. 21/08... Interview - PASSED!!!!

Sept. 2/08... Oath Ceremony

Sept. 5/08... Sent in Voter Registration Card

Sept. 9/08... SSA office to change status to "U.S. citizen"

Oct. 8/08... Applied in person for U.S. Passport

Oct. 22/08... U.S. Passport received

DONE!!! DONE!!! DONE!!! DONE!!!

KAELY (K-2 Visa)

Apr. 6/05... DS-230, Part I faxed to Vancouver Consulate

May 26/05... K-2 Interview - APPROVED!!!!

Sept. 5/05... Entered U.S.

Sept. 7/05... I-485 & I-131 sent to CLB

Feb. 22/06... AOS Interview - APPROVED!!!!! (Passport NOT stamped)

Dec. 4/07... I-751 sent to NSC

May 23/08... 10-Yr. PR Card arrives in the mail

Mar. 22/11.... N-400 sent to AZ

June 27/11..... Interview - PASSED!!!

July 12/11..... Oath Ceremony

We're NOT lawyers.... just your average folks who had to find their own way!!!!! Anything we post here is simply our own opinions/suggestions/experiences and should not be taken as LAW!!!!

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Filed: Other Country: Canada
Timeline

Brad, I'm sure you've considered this, but what about "couples therapy?" Considering the amount of work, time and effort (not to mention love) that's gone into the entire process, I'd strongly suggest looking into a psychologist -- for the both of you. Moving to another country and then going to "living together" from "visiting every so often" is a major change. Marriage can be difficult enough without the strain of immigration and adjusting to a new environment.

Husbands and wives argue and more often than they'd like. Usually (but not always) these conflicts are over relatively unimportant things. My wife and I tend to think alike in many ways, but there are some aspects in which we completely disagree. She's far more liberal than I am. While I would never call myself a Republican, I am very conservative on some issues (most notably in the area of finance). Couple this with the fact my wife can be quite sensitive and I'm not (hardly a surprise there, right? ;)), there's bound to be some misunderstanding and arguments.

I don't know the details of your marriage; however, I do know that over 60% of marriages fail due to communication issues. Maybe this isn't a problem for you and wife, but I'd seek outside help. Family and friends aren't objective and while we may mean well on here, we've only heard one side of the story and lack any other insight into your life.

If you absolutely feel that your marriage can't be saved, then yes, the best thing to do would be to leave the United States. However, I'd give this some serious thought. Once you leave and are gone beyond the limitations set by USCIS, you'll once again become a visitor (even if you and your wife do reconcile).

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Canada
Timeline
Brad, I'm sure you've considered this, but what about "couples therapy?" Considering the amount of work, time and effort (not to mention love) that's gone into the entire process, I'd strongly suggest looking into a psychologist -- for the both of you. Moving to another country and then going to "living together" from "visiting every so often" is a major change. Marriage can be difficult enough without the strain of immigration and adjusting to a new environment.

Husbands and wives argue and more often than they'd like. Usually (but not always) these conflicts are over relatively unimportant things. My wife and I tend to think alike in many ways, but there are some aspects in which we completely disagree. She's far more liberal than I am. While I would never call myself a Republican, I am very conservative on some issues (most notably in the area of finance). Couple this with the fact my wife can be quite sensitive and I'm not (hardly a surprise there, right? ;)), there's bound to be some misunderstanding and arguments.

I don't know the details of your marriage; however, I do know that over 60% of marriages fail due to communication issues. Maybe this isn't a problem for you and wife, but I'd seek outside help. Family and friends aren't objective and while we may mean well on here, we've only heard one side of the story and lack any other insight into your life.

If you absolutely feel that your marriage can't be saved, then yes, the best thing to do would be to leave the United States. However, I'd give this some serious thought. Once you leave and are gone beyond the limitations set by USCIS, you'll once again become a visitor (even if you and your wife do reconcile).

good advice, deadpool. I second this.


"...My hair's mostly wind,

My eyes filled with grit

My skin's white then brown

My lips chapped and split

I've lain on the prairie and heard grasses sigh

I've stared at the vast open bowl of the sky

I've seen all the castles and faces in clouds

My home is the prairie and for that I am proud…

If You're not from the Prairie, you can't know my soul

You don't know our blizzards; you've not fought our cold

You can't know my mind, nor ever my heart

Unless deep within you there's somehow a part…

A part of these things that I've said that I know,

The wind, sky and earth, the storms and the snow.

Best say that you have - and then we'll be one,

For we will have shared that same blazing sun." - David Bouchard

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Brad, I'm sure you've considered this, but what about "couples therapy?" Considering the amount of work, time and effort (not to mention love) that's gone into the entire process, I'd strongly suggest looking into a psychologist -- for the both of you. Moving to another country and then going to "living together" from "visiting every so often" is a major change. Marriage can be difficult enough without the strain of immigration and adjusting to a new environment.

Husbands and wives argue and more often than they'd like. Usually (but not always) these conflicts are over relatively unimportant things. My wife and I tend to think alike in many ways, but there are some aspects in which we completely disagree. She's far more liberal than I am. While I would never call myself a Republican, I am very conservative on some issues (most notably in the area of finance). Couple this with the fact my wife can be quite sensitive and I'm not (hardly a surprise there, right? ;)), there's bound to be some misunderstanding and arguments.

I don't know the details of your marriage; however, I do know that over 60% of marriages fail due to communication issues. Maybe this isn't a problem for you and wife, but I'd seek outside help. Family and friends aren't objective and while we may mean well on here, we've only heard one side of the story and lack any other insight into your life.

If you absolutely feel that your marriage can't be saved, then yes, the best thing to do would be to leave the United States. However, I'd give this some serious thought. Once you leave and are gone beyond the limitations set by USCIS, you'll once again become a visitor (even if you and your wife do reconcile).

and I third it.

The first year of marriage is by far the hardest (take it from me, I really really know)....then pile on all the moving and immigration stuff....super hard.

I wish you much luck Brad...in the end you have to do what is right for you.

Best of luck with everything. (F)


Let's Keep the Song Going!!!

CANADA.GIFUS1.GIF

~Laura and Nicholas~

IMG_1315.jpg

Met online November 2005 playing City of Heroes

First met in Canada, Sept 22, 2006 <3

September 2006 to March 2008, 11 visits, 5 in Canada, 6 in NJ

Officially Engaged December 24th, 2007!!!

Moved to the U.S. to be with my baby on July 19th, 2008 on a K1 visa!!!!

***10 year green card in hand as of 2/2/2012, loving and living life***

Hmmm maybe we should move back to Canada! lol smile.png

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Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Canada
Timeline
Brad, I'm sure you've considered this, but what about "couples therapy?" Considering the amount of work, time and effort (not to mention love) that's gone into the entire process, I'd strongly suggest looking into a psychologist -- for the both of you. Moving to another country and then going to "living together" from "visiting every so often" is a major change. Marriage can be difficult enough without the strain of immigration and adjusting to a new environment.

Husbands and wives argue and more often than they'd like. Usually (but not always) these conflicts are over relatively unimportant things. My wife and I tend to think alike in many ways, but there are some aspects in which we completely disagree. She's far more liberal than I am. While I would never call myself a Republican, I am very conservative on some issues (most notably in the area of finance). Couple this with the fact my wife can be quite sensitive and I'm not (hardly a surprise there, right? ;)), there's bound to be some misunderstanding and arguments.

I don't know the details of your marriage; however, I do know that over 60% of marriages fail due to communication issues. Maybe this isn't a problem for you and wife, but I'd seek outside help. Family and friends aren't objective and while we may mean well on here, we've only heard one side of the story and lack any other insight into your life.

If you absolutely feel that your marriage can't be saved, then yes, the best thing to do would be to leave the United States. However, I'd give this some serious thought. Once you leave and are gone beyond the limitations set by USCIS, you'll once again become a visitor (even if you and your wife do reconcile).

+1 for me too.

I know that marriages take work(although I've never been married, but I listen/read a lot), and I can only imagine what it would be like to go from a long distance relationship to being with each other full time. Or even not-so-long distance, but still living in 2 different countries. If marriages are hard work, marriages like most people's on VJ must be twice as hard! I don't think you really know someone until you've lived with them for some time(even then, do you really? :huh: ).

Now, I'm sure everyone on here wants all the best for you, but like DeadPoolX said, we don't know the whole story. If that's both of your decisions, then follow through. But I really hope it's the last resort.

Good luck.


8/2/2021:  Mailed N-400

8/4/2021: N-400 received

8/6/2021:  Biometrics to be reused

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Filed: Other Timeline

I'm sorry you're having troubles Brad :(

I don't have much to add, other than a hug {{{{{{{{{{{{hug}}}}}}}}}}}


divorced - April 2010 moved back to Ontario May 2010 and surrendered green card

PLEASE DO NOT PRIVATE MESSAGE ME OR EMAIL ME. I HAVE NO IDEA ABOUT CURRENT US IMMIGRATION PROCEDURES!!!!!

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Canada
Timeline

Maybe you should try to separate for little bit? Sometimes a little time away from each other helps. Perhaps get some individual counseling during that time and then come together for couples counseling. Don't take that alone time to do something stupid, it is merely a time to reflect upon yourself and decide what you really want.

Hate to compare marriage or your spouse to a home but think about it this way...

If your marriage were a home, would you call it a fixer upper or would you want to demolish it and start again?

Edited by Sprailenes

Donne moi une poptart!

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Meh, nothing to add, either on the relationship or immigration issues, so I'll just say I'm sorry to hear that and I hope things work out for the best for both of you.


K1

10/02/2007 ~ Sent I-129F to CSC

2/27/2008 ~ NOA2!!! (148 days)

5/27/2008 ~ Interview --- APPROVED!!

5/28/2008 ~ Visa in hand (239 days)

7/17/2008 ~ POE Portal, North Dakota

7/26/2008 ~ Marriage

AOS

8/26/2008 ~ Sent AOS/AP/EAD to Chicago lockbox

9/18/2008 ~ Biometrics in St Louis

9/22/2008 ~ Transferred to CSC

11/05/2008 ~ AP/EAD approved (71 days)

1/20/2009 ~ AOS approved!!! (147 days)

1/29/2009 ~ 2-year GC arrived (156 days)

Removing Conditions

11/18/2010 ~ Sent I-751 to CSC

11/19/2010 ~ I-751 delivered to CSC

11/19/2010 ~ NOA1

12/10/2010 ~ Received biometrics letter

12/21/2010 ~ Biometrics in St Louis

12/29/2010 ~ Touch

1/04/2011 ~ Case status finally available online

2/16/2011 ~ Approved!! (89 days)

2/22/2011 ~ 10-year GC arrived (95 days)

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Filed: Other Timeline

Hi Bradcanuck,

Sorry about your marriage difficulties and having to struggle through it. However, before you "call it quits" you and your spouse should definitely consider couples and individual counselling, as that would certainly help there to make things better, since it makes a clearer understanding of the situation at hand from a "third party perspective" so that a solution will be reached for a better marriage.

If it makes you feel any better, my husband and I have gone through counselling, both individually and together, and it has certainly helped us. We were willing to do "whatever it takes" to make our marriage work, and if it meant going to counselling, so be it....

All couples go through "ups and downs" in their marriage and there are definitely some days that are better than others. It takes a lot of time, sacrifice, communication, compromise, and most importantly love, for such to work, especially more so when dealing with stressful life issues such as immigration and with other important issues. So if you can work together to make the marriage work, despite andy life and/or personal stresses, it will definitely be the greatest "reward" in the end, indeed. "For better or for worse...", right?

Ok, now for your questions regarding immigration (lol..bear in mind I'm not an immigration lawyer, but I will do my best to answer your questions/concerns, based on what I know of the process):

When you file for the I-751 next year, you have the following options:

-Don't file for the I-751, if you desire to go back to Canada. Just let your 2yr conditional green card expire and return back to Canada. Your US immigration residency status will be considered "abandoned" when you don't renew your Green Card and you don't have plans on returning to the US to live here permanently. However, bear in mind that you might be questioned at the US border if ever you do come back for to the US as a "visitor" and or apply for "another visa", as they will have your past immigration information on their records/files.

-File for the I-751, if you are still in the USA. You will have to file this application jointly with your spouse, so you will have to be still married and living with them then during that process and beyond. If you are divorced at the time, and still in the USA, you can also file for the I-751 on your own, on a "waiver". In both cases, you will have to provide "joint evidence" paperwork-wise, proving that you entered the marriage "in good faith" and that you did not just get married for immigration fraud purposes. Bear in mind, depending on your sitauation, and "the luck of the draw", that you may or may not be called for an interview during the I-751 process, so you may have to be prepared for further questioning about your marriage then.

Hope this helps. Good luck with your marriage situation and good luck with the rest of your immigration situation too.

Ant ("For better or for worse...")

I have a good job and a decent lifestyle in the US. However my marriage has been deteriorating for some time now, on both partners ends. Lately every day has been a struggle to get through and I think we both know it's going to end.

That being said - I have questions regarding immigration.

If I decide to leave, what is the process? I am on a greencard and I can file for condition removal November 09. Do I send my card in and then just leave the country?

In the event I abandon the GC and in the future I want to come to the US am I treated as a non resident such as before I received the GC?

We both entered this in good faith but I'm learning we are just too young and I don't think we can do it any longer.

Any help and insight would be appreciated.


**Ant's 1432.gif1502.gif "Once Upon An American Immigration Journey" Condensed Timeline...**

2000 (72+ Months) "Loved": Long-Distance Dating Relationship. D Visited Ant in Canada.

2006 (<1 Month) "Visited": Ant Visited D in America. B-2 Visa Port of Entry Interrogation.

2006 (<1 Month) "Married": Wedding Elopement. Husband & Wife, D and Ant !! Together Forever!

2006 ( 3 Months I-485 Wait) "Adjusted": 2-Years Green Card.

2007 ( 2 Months) "Numbered": SSN Card.

2007 (<1 Months) "Licensed": NYS 4-Years Driver's License.

2009 (10 Months I-751 Wait) "Removed": 10-Years 5-Months Green Card.

2009 ( 9 Months Baby Wait) "Expected": Baby. It's a Boy, Baby A !!! We Are Family, Ant+D+BabyA !

2009 ( 4 Months) "Moved": New House Constructed and Moved Into.

2009 ( 2 Months N-400 Wait) "Naturalized": US Citizenship, Certificate of Naturalization. Goodbye USCIS!!!!

***Ant is a Naturalized American Citizen!!***: November 23, 2009 (Private Oath Ceremony: USCIS Office, Buffalo, NY, USA)

2009 (<1 Month) "Secured": US Citizen SSN Card.

2009 (<1 Month) "Enhanced": US Citizen NYS 8-Years Enhanced Driver's License. (in lieu of a US Passport)

2010 ( 1 Month) "Voted": US Citizen NYS Voter's Registration Card.

***~~~"The End...And the Americans, Ant+D+BabyA, lived 'Happily Ever After'!"...~~~***

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I'm so sorry Brad that at this time of year, a time of reflection, your thoughts are of ending the marriage. I can't offer too much advise. I think a couple knows when they've got problems, and they either end the marriage or look at how they can save it. It takes a lot of energy and hard work however to save a marriage, if it's been left untended for a long time.

This having been my second marriage, I've been there before. While we still ended up divorcing, I did try my best to make it work, and we both attended marriage counselling for about 6 months, then I myself continued with the counselling for another 6 months. While ours wasn't a success, I know that it's helped countless people, so I always advocate for counselling before calling it quits.

Even if you both decide that you can't do the counselling, at some point, please go yourself to help yourself heal.

At this time of year, when there are so many pressures and your energy level is waning, it may be best to wait until after the holiday season to make some decisions.

We're always here for you, whether you decide to go back to Canada or not. (F)


carlahmsb4.gif

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