Let's Talk .....

[reeses16 8]

We're still working on retirement at my house. I want us to each get a RothIRA...he's against the idea because of the economy. I wanted to argue about it. I know the key is time...but I've been tracking 3 mutual funds I'm interested in....I watched my favorite on go from about 8.70 to 3.50 in the last 2 months. I think it would have made me upset if I had money in it. So our current compromise is finish our emergency fund, pay off our last credit card. And then I can start IRA investments. pretty reasonable. : )

[Bassi and Zainab 1]

We're still working on retirement at my house. I want us to each get a RothIRA...he's against the idea because of the economy. I wanted to argue about it. I know the key is time...but I've been tracking 3 mutual funds I'm interested in....I watched my favorite on go from about 8.70 to 3.50 in the last 2 months. I think it would have made me upset if I had money in it. So our current compromise is finish our emergency fund, pay off our last credit card. And then I can start IRA investments. pretty reasonable. : )

I think that's a very good plan!

I haven't been upset about the market. Truthfully, I have 30+ years before I will be thinking about accessing those funds. Lots of time to turn things around. I'm happy I get more shares now for the same investment.

Now, I am annoyed that a promised salary increase next year has been nixed by the governor last week. Just a basic cost of living increase of 3%. I'm happy with my salary, but an increase is ALWAYS welcome! I work hard for the money he won't give me. Unless I'm on VJ.

[kk_mine 0]

Well call me crazy but yes I tried to talk to him about it as well and he did not understand it at first (we talk about everything). Then when I explnd it to him he said that he wished not to talk about it at that time. He said you are soon to be the wife of my youth and why do we need to think about that. He told me that when he thought about it during the day he could not bear to do so any longer as he felt threatened of thinking of me not being around. Even though we are not married I talked over with my mom on more then one occasion that in the event of my death I would like all $ to go to him no matter if we are married or not. My mom had no problem with that. But I have not mentioned to him again as I knew he was not too keen on it at first. But my mom and I talked about it again the other day.

My older sister under 40yrs of age has cancer and now I'm getting checked for the first time this year as she has it. I just had a mammogram (1st one ever) this week and he did not like to talk too much about it. He mentioned to me don't you have an appointment coming up soon and I expln yes. But we did not talk much about it. I explained what a mammogram is and why I needed to take it. I also told him that if anything is wrong they will call me soon (hope I don't get a call) and he did not really say much.

But esp once married we will need to revisit what he does not like to discuss.

[reeses16 8]

For anyone still working on a Will, I found a coupon for the online Suze Orman Will & Trust Kit. It regularly costs $13.50, but you can get if for free if you use the gift code "people first"

https://www.suzeormanwillandtrust.com/giftcode/

[Bassi and Zainab 1]

For anyone still working on a Will, I found a coupon for the online Suze Orman Will & Trust Kit. It regularly costs $13.50, but you can get if for free if you use the gift code "people first"

https://www.suzeormanwillandtrust.com/giftcode/

Thanks for the information.

[ForeverAmen 0]

For anyone still working on a Will, I found a coupon for the online Suze Orman Will & Trust Kit. It regularly costs $13.50, but you can get if for free if you use the gift code "people first"

https://www.suzeormanwillandtrust.com/giftcode/

Thanks for sharing this info.

Edited November 17, 2008 by Boaz

[onwa 6]

When I was first married I made the mistake of jokingly saying that both of us dying in a car crash would be a nice way to go....when we are old of course. we laugh about it now. But that was probably brought up and fought about for a good two years.

[Ta Ta 1]

When I was first married I made the mistake of jokingly saying that both of us dying in a car crash would be a nice way to go....when we are old of course. we laugh about it now. But that was probably brought up and fought about for a good two years.

[Bassi and Zainab 1]

When I was first married I made the mistake of jokingly saying that both of us dying in a car crash would be a nice way to go....when we are old of course. we laugh about it now. But that was probably brought up and fought about for a good two years.

My husband is muslim. I told him that if he dies first he'd better not think about touching a virgin or I'll kill myself just so I can go up there and kick his ..... Well, you can imagine the tumult that ensued. So much for my witty sarcasm.

FYI....if he cheats on me in the afterlife...IT'S ON!

[Ta Ta 1]

When I was first married I made the mistake of jokingly saying that both of us dying in a car crash would be a nice way to go....when we are old of course. we laugh about it now. But that was probably brought up and fought about for a good two years.

My husband is muslim. I told him that if he dies first he'd better not think about touching a virgin or I'll kill myself just so I can go up there and kick his ..... Well, you can imagine the tumult that ensued. So much for my witty sarcasm.

FYI....if he cheats on me in the afterlife...IT'S ON!

Oh my gosh, you are so funny..........

They don't get humorous sarcasm don't they

We need to make a journal or at least a thread on ' misunderstandings '. What I said and what he thought I said and vice versa.

[Kanyiri 0]

Yeah, sarcasm doesn't go over well. I've tried to cut it out entirely because it always leads to arguments.

With that being said, recently he has said a few things sarcastically and I've had to do a double take to make sure it was really him who said it. There is usually a sly look on his face. I laugh for hours afterwards, because sarcasm from a Ghanaian? There is nothing more funny.

[ForeverAmen 0]

Thanks for all of the responses. In order to keep my sanity, and a level of peace in my home I've chosen to leave this subject alone ... at least for now. Last night was yet another attempt, and it resulted in me wanting to him over the head, and call him something other than his name. So for now I will give him some .

Sometimes I wonder how someone I love, and care about so much can work my last nerve!

Boaz

[Perseverance 1]

My husband does not like to talk about death either, he will always tell me ,"nothing is going to happen to you, stop talking like that" he lost both of his parents before he was 20 I dont know if that plays a factor in his reaction to the subject or not.

When I talk to him about insurance and such I just dont mention death, he works in the Oil industry and it is a dangerous field. I just talk about things like accidents or loss of limbs. We both know what the underlying subject is (death) I dont mention it, and it makes him feel better.

He will not talk about burial or where he wants to be laid to rest. I told him that if we are not going to discuss it then I will have to make the decision for him. He seems to be ok with that.

Another subject that he has a hard time with is the fact that I am 35 years old and my child bearing years are coming to an end. He does not seem to understand that and looks at me like I am crazy. If he wants a biological child, I am running out of time. When we met it did not seems like an issue, but time passes so quickly....

I did not have any problems getting pregnant with my 3 children, but I was younger then. I could have trouble now, he just does not get it. Sometimes it makes me sad, a child is something I wanted to share with him, I wanted to be able to give him that gift. I just dont talk about it anymore.

P

[Ta Ta 1]

P, maybe there will come a right time to discuss it again if you feel you need to.

[ForeverAmen 0]

P, maybe there will come a right time to discuss it again if you feel you need to.

I agree.

P - sometimes giving them a little time to think does work. I will pray for your hearts desire to be fulfilled. Most importantly - trust God that His perfect will be done.

Boaz