I just HAD to say something ...

[Sister Fracas 5]

I've read Americans in general are actually doing a disservice to their children with an environment that is too sterile.

I've heard that too-something about if your child gets an infection in the first year of life, they will be less likely to have certain conditions...I think allergies was one of them.

toooo dang much of this anti-bacterial #######.

[keltic 1]

this kid could have been pulling stuff all day and the mom just snapped. It's like Chris Rock says: "I didn't say it was right.....but I understand".

so, by this logic... if you pull out in front of someone while driving, cutting them off... you are the 3rd person that day... so, they snap and ram your car... then... hey... you would understand, right?

That's hilarious. Are you trying to say that deliberately slamming your car into another car is the same thing?

come now, you are surely intelligent enough to be able to see the point i am making... but, ill play along with you...

according to your logic, if someone snaps because of stress, then its ok... i think thats ludicrous... i think ppl should take responsibility for their actions... and no matter how much a child is a 'brat', it doesnt mean that the parent has a right to 'snap' and shove food into his/her mouth to the point of choking

what is a parent teaching their child with that? not to control anger? that force is the answer to frustration?

[Jenn! 918]

I've read Americans in general are actually doing a disservice to their children with an environment that is too sterile.

I've heard that too-something about if your child gets an infection in the first year of life, they will be less likely to have certain conditions...I think allergies was one of them.

toooo dang much of this anti-bacterial #######.

Yes, in fact, I'm thinking of creating a new line of children's soaps - "Pier Pizza Soap", I'll call it. That was one great mom - protecting her kid from future infections and allergies...

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

I've read Americans in general are actually doing a disservice to their children with an environment that is too sterile.

I've heard that too-something about if your child gets an infection in the first year of life, they will be less likely to have certain conditions...I think allergies was one of them.

toooo dang much of this anti-bacterial #######.

Yes, in fact, I'm thinking of creating a new line of children's soaps - "Pier Pizza Soap", I'll call it. That was one great mom - protecting her kid from future infections and allergies...

You guys are right... I guess I should've given her a medal!

[mercuryroad 0]

this kid could have been pulling stuff all day and the mom just snapped. It's like Chris Rock says: "I didn't say it was right.....but I understand".

so, by this logic... if you pull out in front of someone while driving, cutting them off... you are the 3rd person that day... so, they snap and ram your car... then... hey... you would understand, right?

That's hilarious. Are you trying to say that deliberately slamming your car into another car is the same thing?

come now, you are surely intelligent enough to be able to see the point i am making... but, ill play along with you...

according to your logic, if someone snaps because of stress, then its ok... i think thats ludicrous... i think ppl should take responsibility for their actions... and no matter how much a child is a 'brat', it doesnt mean that the parent has a right to 'snap' and shove food into his/her mouth to the point of choking

what is a parent teaching their child with that? not to control anger? that force is the answer to frustration?

You're right.....I take back everything I said. Clearly I was wrong and Gimy was right.

[Traviesa 0]

I've read Americans in general are actually doing a disservice to their children with an environment that is too sterile.

I've heard that too-something about if your child gets an infection in the first year of life, they will be less likely to have certain conditions...I think allergies was one of them.

toooo dang much of this anti-bacterial #######.

Yes, in fact, I'm thinking of creating a new line of children's soaps - "Pier Pizza Soap", I'll call it. That was one great mom - protecting her kid from future infections and allergies...

You guys are right... I guess I should've given her a medal!

Hey-wait now! I'm not saying that's something I would EVER do...in fact, I think it's gross.

[Jenn! 918]

I've read Americans in general are actually doing a disservice to their children with an environment that is too sterile.

I've heard that too-something about if your child gets an infection in the first year of life, they will be less likely to have certain conditions...I think allergies was one of them.

toooo dang much of this anti-bacterial #######.

Yes, in fact, I'm thinking of creating a new line of children's soaps - "Pier Pizza Soap", I'll call it. That was one great mom - protecting her kid from future infections and allergies...

You guys are right... I guess I should've given her a medal!

Hey-wait now! I'm not saying that's something I would EVER do...in fact, I think it's gross.

I think he gets it. We just sort of exaggerated things there and ran with them.

[Traviesa 0]

this kid could have been pulling stuff all day and the mom just snapped. It's like Chris Rock says: "I didn't say it was right.....but I understand".

so, by this logic... if you pull out in front of someone while driving, cutting them off... you are the 3rd person that day... so, they snap and ram your car... then... hey... you would understand, right?

That's hilarious. Are you trying to say that deliberately slamming your car into another car is the same thing?

come now, you are surely intelligent enough to be able to see the point i am making... but, ill play along with you...

according to your logic, if someone snaps because of stress, then its ok... i think thats ludicrous... i think ppl should take responsibility for their actions... and no matter how much a child is a 'brat', it doesnt mean that the parent has a right to 'snap' and shove food into his/her mouth to the point of choking

what is a parent teaching their child with that? not to control anger? that force is the answer to frustration?

Whatever lesson that mother may or may not have been trying to teach the child was lost in the embarrasment and humiliation that the child faced. She hasn't learned a thing-certainly not to clean her plate when she's eating. Those types of lessons are to be taught at home before parading your child around in public, and affecting other people's attempts at enjoying their dinner (obviously it was distracting to several people). Corrective discipline in front of other people should be reserved for issues of safety. Lessons coupled by embarrassment are a waste of time and an inconvenience to everyone else. And, going back to this theory, if this WAS the child's fault, and she was simply starved for attention, then the mom is doing her a disservice by catering to that, in which case the next tantrum will be bigger and even more embarrassing. I can't think of one single excuse for the mom in this instance.

[Sister Fracas 5]

I've read Americans in general are actually doing a disservice to their children with an environment that is too sterile.

I've heard that too-something about if your child gets an infection in the first year of life, they will be less likely to have certain conditions...I think allergies was one of them.

toooo dang much of this anti-bacterial #######.

Yes, in fact, I'm thinking of creating a new line of children's soaps - "Pier Pizza Soap", I'll call it. That was one great mom - protecting her kid from future infections and allergies...

There you go! I want a cut though...

[Cristy 4]

I like gettnig spanked...oh wait...wrong thread.

[mercuryroad 0]

I like gettnig spanked...oh wait...wrong thread.

I think you are overreacting

[Cristy 4]

I like gettnig spanked...oh wait...wrong thread.

I think you are overreacting

Maybe so because I can't spell today lol

[keltic 1]

Whatever lesson that mother may or may not have been trying to teach the child was lost in the embarrasment and humiliation that the child faced. She hasn't learned a thing-certainly not to clean her plate when she's eating. Those types of lessons are to be taught at home before parading your child around in public, and affecting other people's attempts at enjoying their dinner (obviously it was distracting to several people). Corrective discipline in front of other people should be reserved for issues of safety. Lessons coupled by embarrassment are a waste of time and an inconvenience to everyone else. And, going back to this theory, if this WAS the child's fault, and she was simply starved for attention, then the mom is doing her a disservice by catering to that, in which case the next tantrum will be bigger and even more embarrassing. I can't think of one single excuse for the mom in this instance.

i agree with almost everything you are saying here... however, even when we are not trying to teach our kids things, they are learning by how we react to stimuli/stressors... i do not think the child learned a lesson that the mother was intending to teach... instead, she learned impatience, that its ok to lose your temper if you have apparent reason... she learned humiliation, embarrassment, and to lie...

all this is simply based on what gimy told us... and as we werent there to see it for ourselves, we can only post based on what information she gave us

i agree with you about corrective discipline not belonging in public... and as for me, i would remove my daughter from the restaurant and during that time, i would be cooling down enough to be able to deal with her in a manner that is appropriate... i also agree with you about there being a reason behind the childs behavior if, indeed, she was just going for an oscar...

i also cant think of an acceptable excuse for the mother in this instance

i am not one of the popular 'clique' here, so often my responses are overlooked... or just not accepted... and even mocked (see earlier in this thread)... but it does not mean that i do not have a right to express my opinion as much or as clearly as others here... and THIS happens to be a topic that i feel very strongly about

I like gettnig spanked...oh wait...wrong thread.

it can be quite exciting, when BOTH parties are willing, cant it?

Edited June 2, 2006 by keltic

[PsychoKat 0]

Okay I'm a little late saying this but hey it's well thought out

I thought number 1 was the most interesting here (ie. the other ones sucked ). Different families do things differently. I think alot of people here would label that as abuse and may have possibly said something to the Dad. Me, no way. As you can see, the boy was fine.

I dunno. I realize some people think that type of "horseplay" is not ok (and yes, I realize many of you will think it's more than horseplay). But all families do things differently. I think it's presumptuous to judge a situation like that when taken out of the context of that family's interactions and viewed by an outsider. Sometimes people just get the worng idea.

Well there are a couple of ways to look at this. You are assigning the behavior to horseplay, yet Agent Smith described the father turning beet red with rage after repeatedly telling the child to stop.

His description of the situation is one of a father who is, using force and fear to discipline the boy for not responding to his initial requests. Now if that was the intent involved in this, take a look at the boys response. After walking away from the father the boy throws another ball of sand at him. The actions of the father did not teach the boy that it was important to understand limits, and respect others. The boy instead spitefully sought revenge and threw another. The father lashed out in anger at the boy, teaching the boy to lash out in anger in return. If this was a matter of anger and discipline, the whether you would consider it abusive or not, it was not a positive lesson, it was a destructive lesson. Away from home, you can't physically lash out in anger if you don't get what you want from people, not without eventually finding your way to jail.

Now on your side of the coin, if this was a situation that was nothing more than horseplay, a loving father having a rough play with his son, sure someone might say something to the father about it out of concern for the son. But If this was a loving fun bit of horseplay with no ill intent, there would be no reason for the father to feel defensive about being approached or be offended. What would be the grounds, the idea that someone cared enough to step forward to ensure the wellbeing of his child?

One could only hope that if someone attempted to harm your child as they walked home from school, or played with their friends, someone just like that, willing to put themselves at risk to ensure the childs safety were there.

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

Agent Smith described the father turning beet red with rage...

Yeah this dude was really white and then he turned really red. Kinda amusing, actually.

Good post.