Dowry!

[Y's_habibitk 2]

they will also ask what (conditions) are to be attached

Ya, the judge kept saying.. are you sure you dont want any conditions?!? lol

Then he teased me because I signed the BLANK contract and said.. ha ha we could put anything in there..

The "translator" (husbands friend) looked like a deer caught in headlights the whole time,... I think he got out at one point "do you, yourself Lisa .. Yazied" and habibi and the judge ended up translating and we all laughed afterwords..

I just remember thinking, whatever.. please say we are man and wife.

The judge guy smiled sincerely at us and gave me a piece of candy and said congratulations. ( I still carry that around of course)

Edited March 2, 2008 by Y_habibitk

[brnidokiegurl 0]

When i finally was told what (conditions) were now picture this it was in a legal office and the man ask are there any conditions i said yes I WILL ALWAYS BE BOSS, i think he was getting ready to write until he heard those words ha now this wasnt real formal or anything and we had talked to this man before and his dad was there with us and his brothes and uncle. He was looking at the papers ready to write and he ask YOU WANT TO BE BOSS? and i said yes of course all were laughing by then and he just turned and give me the thumbs up, of course our papers say no conditions ha im sure he was thinking the idea of a woman saying this

[~Jackie~ 30]

Hindsight is indeed 20/20

jJ

[SaadBell 0]

I am not so sure this dowry thing is worth much anymore. My ex's cousin, he just divorced his american wife and went to jordan and married an arab girl...I saw their wedding contract and her said Dowry: Nothing.

Oh, that is awful, what a tool, I feel for his American wife.

[~Jackie~ 30]

I feel for both of them. The american wife really loved hani and was not expecting to divorce. Now there is the new jordanian wife. I wonder if she knows how heartbroken wife #1 was. I wonder if she will know how much marj cried for hani. He divorced her 2 months after getting citizenship. I wonder if Amman will question that, how he could divorce and marry so quickly.

jJ

[morocco4ever 63]

Out of curiousity did anybody receive dowry in jewelry or money?

Sure I did, it's their tradition. What about you?

[PalestineMyHeart 1,897]

[PetraPerson101 0]

Our agreement was as follows:

1 JD

Her mother said, and I quote: "My daughter is not for sale."

Of course, I did get her a nice gift of her choosing.

Edited March 3, 2008 by KyanWan

[Nutty 2]

Yes. Gold coins, cash...

Very unexpected because I just didn't think about it on all the excitement..but then I had an Iranian man acting on my behalf during the discussion before the vows took place.

Edited March 3, 2008 by Nutty

[Nutty 2]

Yes. Gold coins, cash...

Very unexpected because I just didn't think about it on all the excitement..but then I had an Iranian man who decided to approach the subject on my behalf during the discussion before the vows took place.

[ya falaha! 0]

Would dowry for divorced women in the Mid East be different and or less than dowry given to women who were not previously married? Talking about divorced MENA women, not Western women.

Edited March 3, 2008 by moody

[doodlebugg 10]

I got my ring, that i'm highly allergic to, then a bunch of jewlery that I'm sorry to say I don't wear because I'm really not into jewlery. I forget the amount written in the contract but I think it's 100 egp or something like that.

He said he'll bring my replacement ring with him. I tried wearing a fake one but it turned my finger black. I hope it's not a sign.

[SaadBell 0]

I feel for both of them. The american wife really loved hani and was not expecting to divorce. Now there is the new jordanian wife. I wonder if she knows how heartbroken wife #1 was. I wonder if she will know how much marj cried for hani. He divorced her 2 months after getting citizenship. I wonder if Amman will question that, how he could divorce and marry so quickly.

jJ

Things like that make me crazy, my heart goes out to his first wife. Thank goodness I believe in getting nasty revenge.

[PalestineMyHeart 1,897]

Would dowry for divorced women in the Mid East be different and or less than dowry given to women who were not previously married? Talking about divorced MENA women, not Western women.

Not necessarily, at least not in Palestine. It's all up to the couple, or the families who are negotiating. Some never-married women who are quite beautiful and accomplished agree to set their dowries quite low, and some divorced ladies with several children set their dowries quite high. It all depends on the couple's agreement.

Also, sometimes a very high mahr can indicate other issues. For instance, there was a young man from my husband's village who was having pre-marital sex with a young lady. He was a player, of course -- he led her to believe that he'd marry her, took what he wanted, and figured he'd then move on. Of course, the damage to her reputation would be irreversible.

However, her family found out about it, and went straight to the authorities. A group of extremely intimidating men went after the guy and gave him two choices: he could immediately marry the lady (and agree to a 50,000 dinar mahr which would be immediately payable if he tried to divorce her) or they would beat the ####### out of him (and quite possibly beat him into permanent disability or death.) Not surprisingly, he chose marriage. If he wants out, he can pay the price for what he did. Meanwhile, her honor has been restored.

-MK

[ya falaha! 0]

Thanks, MK! I've been very curious about divorced women and dowries but never felt comfortable asking. Now I know!