Can I have a vent....

[Kat And Russ 0]

Hey guys,

I will apologise for not being on here as often as I would like or should. When Russ and I went through the visa process this was my life line and helped me through to the end....

Now I am here in america "land of dreams" and my life feels like a nightmare. I have a job that thankfully I love, my boss is amazing and I am learning everyday, however I am on such a poor wage that we can bearly survive. My parents own a buisness in UK and I get paid less then the students that work there!

I work 12 hour days and come home half dead and ready to just go to bed, to start all over again the next day. We litrally would not survice if it wasnt for my amazing parents who, now have to send us money each month.

On top of all of this, I cant get health insurance. My employer doesnt have it, and to get it with Russ emplyer it would cost $1200 a month. I am 20 pounds over weight and so can not get health insurance individually on my own.

I feel like everythign is against us, thnkfully Russ and I are stronger then ever and bless his heart he is willing to give up a job he adores to go work in retail, so we can have health insurance. Eventually we want children, but I cant get insurance and so that not even a possibility right now.

I am so mad... this country is one of the most powerful in the world and here I am working my a*s off daily, and getting nothing for it.

I am in such a frustrated, hating ameirca mood right now... sorry to all the american lovers who will no doubt trash me, there always there to give ####### when you need it least.

Just looking for advice... support in what seems like a hopeless time.

I fought so hard for my visa, and I know that so many people are going through it now and feeling so very alone with out there loved one, but I feel like giving it all up! I just want to go home!

[PlatyPius 5]

Hey guys,

I will apologise for not being on here as often as I would like or should. When Russ and I went through the visa process this was my life line and helped me through to the end....

Now I am here in america "land of dreams" and my life feels like a nightmare. I have a job that thankfully I love, my boss is amazing and I am learning everyday, however I am on such a poor wage that we can bearly survive. My parents own a buisness in UK and I get paid less then the students that work there!

I work 12 hour days and come home half dead and ready to just go to bed, to start all over again the next day. We litrally would not survice if it wasnt for my amazing parents who, now have to send us money each month.

On top of all of this, I cant get health insurance. My employer doesnt have it, and to get it with Russ emplyer it would cost $1200 a month. I am 20 pounds over weight and so can not get health insurance individually on my own.

I feel like everythign is against us, thnkfully Russ and I are stronger then ever and bless his heart he is willing to give up a job he adores to go work in retail, so we can have health insurance. Eventually we want children, but I cant get insurance and so that not even a possibility right now.

I am so mad... this country is one of the most powerful in the world and here I am working my a*s off daily, and getting nothing for it.

I am in such a frustrated, hating ameirca mood right now... sorry to all the american lovers who will no doubt trash me, there always there to give ####### when you need it least.

Just looking for advice... support in what seems like a hopeless time.

I fought so hard for my visa, and I know that so many people are going through it now and feeling so very alone with out there loved one, but I feel like giving it all up! I just want to go home!

Aside from all of the other things, this one stood out the most.

a) You can get health insurance through Anthem/Blue Cross Blue Shield for somewhere around $200-$300 month (that was the estimate for Mags and Jordan).

2) I have NEVER heard of someone not being able to get insurance because of being 20 pounds overweight. Wouldn't ya think that NO one in the US would have insurance if that were the case?

#) Otherwise.... it all depends on where you live in the US. Here in the "fly-over" state of Indiana, a small family can live quite well if both people are making $10/hour or more.

[Chica Yeyé 41]

My dearest friend,

I for one, will not judge you (I did check my cabinet this morning and it said: Len, I don't need your help; signed: God). I understand your frustration and exhaustion. I do. I am also happy to hear that your relationship is going strong. Keep at it my dear friend; you are stronger than you think.

I don't give advice, just good vibes.

Peace, L.

[Kat And Russ 0]

Hey guys,

I will apologise for not being on here as often as I would like or should. When Russ and I went through the visa process this was my life line and helped me through to the end....

Now I am here in america "land of dreams" and my life feels like a nightmare. I have a job that thankfully I love, my boss is amazing and I am learning everyday, however I am on such a poor wage that we can bearly survive. My parents own a buisness in UK and I get paid less then the students that work there!

I work 12 hour days and come home half dead and ready to just go to bed, to start all over again the next day. We litrally would not survice if it wasnt for my amazing parents who, now have to send us money each month.

On top of all of this, I cant get health insurance. My employer doesnt have it, and to get it with Russ emplyer it would cost $1200 a month. I am 20 pounds over weight and so can not get health insurance individually on my own.

I feel like everythign is against us, thnkfully Russ and I are stronger then ever and bless his heart he is willing to give up a job he adores to go work in retail, so we can have health insurance. Eventually we want children, but I cant get insurance and so that not even a possibility right now.

I am so mad... this country is one of the most powerful in the world and here I am working my a*s off daily, and getting nothing for it.

I am in such a frustrated, hating ameirca mood right now... sorry to all the american lovers who will no doubt trash me, there always there to give ####### when you need it least.

Just looking for advice... support in what seems like a hopeless time.

I fought so hard for my visa, and I know that so many people are going through it now and feeling so very alone with out there loved one, but I feel like giving it all up! I just want to go home!

Aside from all of the other things, this one stood out the most.

a) You can get health insurance through Anthem/Blue Cross Blue Shield for somewhere around $200-$300 month (that was the estimate for Mags and Jordan).

2) I have NEVER heard of someone not being able to get insurance because of being 20 pounds overweight. Wouldn't ya think that NO one in the US would have insurance if that were the case?

#) Otherwise.... it all depends on where you live in the US. Here in the "fly-over" state of Indiana, a small family can live quite well if both people are making $10/hour or more.

We live in florida, and would move to UK in a heartbeat but Russ has his Kids here and we would never leave them.

I was told becuase im short and fat ( in not so many words) that I would not be allowed to get insurance... trust me I have looked EVERYWHERE for it. If you can tell me a insurance company that will insure a "overweight" person I will be forever in your debt!

My dearest friend,

I for one, will not judge you (I did check my cabinet this morning and it said: Len, I don't need your help; signed: God). I understand your frustration and exhaustion. I do. I am also happy to hear that your relationship is going strong. Keep at it my dear friend; you are stronger than you think.

I don't give advice, just good vibes.

Peace, L.

Thank you, that made me smile

x

[greeneyedgirlfl 0]

I've often wondered how I'm going to get Darren on my insurance plan when he finally gets over here...and if I didn't have a job that thankfully comes with health insurance benefits (public school teacher), I'd probably be in the same boat, since I have to lose another 50 pounds or so (already have lost 80)...

I live in FL too, so I completely understand about our abyssmal salaries and the lack of affordable housing (esp. recently). I wish I could help you out with the name of an insurance carrier...I'll check with my uncle (used to work for a large insurance carrier)....

I'll be sending you positive thoughts in the interim...

[PlatyPius 5]

Is the "overweight thing" specific to Florida? I've never heard of anyone in Indiana being turned down for health insurance because they were overweight....

I've had insurance at various times, and according to the charts, I'm almost 100 pounds overweight.

[Kat And Russ 0]

I've often wondered how I'm going to get Darren on my insurance plan when he finally gets over here...and if I didn't have a job that thankfully comes with health insurance benefits (public school teacher), I'd probably be in the same boat, since I have to lose another 50 pounds or so (already have lost 80)...

I live in FL too, so I completely understand about our abyssmal salaries and the lack of affordable housing (esp. recently). I wish I could help you out with the name of an insurance carrier...I'll check with my uncle (used to work for a large insurance carrier)....

I'll be sending you positive thoughts in the interim...

Thank you sweetie, I am calming slowly hehehe

[Hannah+Vito 0]

i cant believe they told you that! i showed the post to my fiance but the only insurance peeps he can think of are cobra health insurance or kasier but they r just off top of his head. wish i could help you! hope things work out for you.

[Lansbury 19]

I was told becuase im short and fat ( in not so many words) that I would not be allowed to get insurance... trust me I have looked EVERYWHERE for it. If you can tell me a insurance company that will insure a "overweight" person I will be forever in your debt!

I'm 59 and must be 30lbs overweight and insured myself no problems with Blue Cross/Blue Shield. I pay $367 a month including dental.

[Boiler 43,742]

Which Insurers have you approached so far.

I guess you can live on $10 an hour, depends on the mutiplier.

But that is a lot less than the minimum wage in the UK and you have Health costs on top.

I would be looking for a new line of work.

[ajames79 0]

Chris and I both just got insured together with Blue Cross Blue Shield. Around $434 a month which includes dental and maternity.

I am about 30 pounds over weight (but I lost 12 in the last 2 months *pats me on the back*) and they call Chris "over weight" too...even though he is 6ft8inches Tall for heavens sake...and we were insured No Problem.

There are options.

I am sorry you are out there having a hard time with work. It is tough. Chris made a better wage in England as well. But we make do. My suggestion is looking for another job. If this one isn't paying well there should be others out there. Winter (at least in NC) can be hard on people. Jobs open up more in the summer I think.

Being a waitress isn't for everyone I know but I just to make loads of money in fine dining.

What about going back to school? Perhaps that make the pathway a little easier for a better paying job?

You will be okay. I feel sure.

[Kat And Russ 0]

Maybe it's a Florida thing because I have been told by every insurance company that i am over weight.

I have tried Aetna and they sent me a letter, after that I have not applied fully just called and asked and they say becaus eof height weight ratio I would be denied.... maybe I should just try applying....

[truffles 2]

Havent got anything to add....just wanted to send warm thoughts and best wishes ...i am on the jobhunt here and understand how your feeling...chin up! and lots of good wishes

[Army_Wife 2]

Hi,

My name is Sarah, and I couldn't help but read your posting, and it really touched my heart ..... and brought back many yukky memories of my own from when I used to live in the US many years ago.

Firstly, please don't worry about what negative stuff other people may say to you concerning your feelings about how hard America is ..... many of them (not all) will learn the brutal truth on their own when they get there ....first hand .... just like I did 14 years ago ..... just like my parents before me ..... just like you are now.

My parents infact used to work in England at one point, for some of the year, and benefit from the similar diabolical conversion rate to what we have now, when they returned .... it's the 80's all over again

When I lived there as an adult before, some places in the US didn't even accept an British university degree; it had to go through some conversion system which took ages in New York. In the meantime you would work a crappy job for a minimum wage (I think it's $5 an hour or there abouts now) so you just put basic food on the table.

However, I'm sure that's changed now.

And we Brits complain about our long working hours and low pay .... ha, most don't have a clue!!!! Working in the States will turn you into a proverbial machine ..... and if you return to England with the same work ethic .... you get to the top .... QUICKLY!!! I did!

They really work hard!

My negative memories of America back then were ..... you had to work your a*s off just to make ends meet ... I had many strange jobs while trying to prepare for my new state exams in a subject I was already highly trained and experienced in. And when I moved to another state, I had to do it all over again.

Then the medical insurance subject, which you have brought up ..... that was totally awful!!! ..... I actually brought a letter from my doctor in England, therefore I could get some form of coverage. I don't think that people are aware that real sickness in America, without proper coverage can put you on the streets. I mean HOMELESS!!!!

We may all knock the NHS, but at least you know you'll get treated without a bill for thousands of dollars.

And yes, the US insurance companies policies are really quite alien to us at times, but you will find a way.

At least MRSA isn't such a problem there.

I grew up in Florida as a kid for a while back in the 80's, where my Mum worked as a nurse .... she was horrified to see people who were dying from gun wounds ..... heart attacks ..... and ladies just about to give birth .... were turned away for not having insurance ..... they would have more than likely died. My Mum did the best she could to help.

However, there are free hospitals ..... but few and far between, I would certainly try to locate one as close to you as possible. People may knock Hilary Clinton, but I remember when she tried to change that particular part of the medical system all those years ago when her Husband was President. So there are some states or areas now that will treat you first and bill you later.

Sure, to a lot of people, they think that going to America means a fabulous way of life .... immediately .... and yes, if you're coming from a 3rd world country .... living on the minimum wage, in a run down apartment block, where people die from drive by shootings ..... may be fine to you. But to those coming from countries which are not like that, find it difficult.

Unless you're from Leicester ha ha ..... joke.

Just like the Eastern Block people who come to England thinking that the money they make fom daffodil picking in Cornwall is the equivalent to a fortune back in whatever place they came from. Yet, only students and the unemployed Brits would ever dream of doing such a menial job.

The poverty guidelines given with the Affidavit of Support are no way a reflection of what you'll really need to live on in a lot of places in America ..... to the standard which some of us Brits are used to ..... they are just that ..... poverty guidelines.

Let's not forget that the cost of petrol there is also creeping up ..... it may not be as high as England, but it certainly isn't the 90 cents a gallon it used to be.

Yes, living in America may seem great to those who have never been ..... just look at Baywatch and Friends ..... how cool .... but they forget to tell you, that you will be lucky to get 10 days paid holiday a year with a lot of jobs ..... if you don't sort out your medical insurance, you'd better NOT get sick ...... and the cost of living is not as cheap as you think in some places .... especially parts of Florida.

This time I'm prepared ..... I'm sorting out my education transcripts already ..... and getting ready for my state exams for when I get there.

I love America, don't get me wrong ..... there are many amazing things about America, and I have a lot of loyalty to the country .... I've spent a huge amount of my life there, and growing up in America gave me many skills which enabled me to flourish beyond my wildest dreams when back in the U.K. ..... the education I received at school there was incredible ..... I would definately choose an American school over an English school ...... the teachers I had there actually cared ... and taught me that I could be whatever I wanted to be, I just had had to want it bad enough.

Whereas most schools I attended in England only showed me that unless I was the cream of the crop ..... I was simply a 'nothing'. Confidence is not something I was used to having built in the UK ..... that came from my parents ..... but most of all my American schools. I cannot praise the teachers there highly enough.

Both sides of the Atlantic have their plus points, and their negative points. And even though we speak the same language ..... at times it's as if you're living in Timbuktu ..... you will get used it, I promise.

I too will need to get used to it all over again ..... but I love my Husband sooo much, that I'm happy to return to the US to be with him, and go through the transition again.

My advise at this stage would be to look at what jobs pay good money and check out how to qualify for them ..... community college is cheap in some places ..... and you'll get a great confidence boost from the teachers, they really are helpful.

Don't give up ..... I know it's difficult ..... but, like you said, you fought so hard to get there to be with your Man. There's always a way.

Big hug,

Sarah xx

p.s. I see you're in Florida, I'm going to be in Atlanta for a year when I get there and then we're planning to move to Florida afterwards. I guess life just runs full circle sometimes .... And by the way Rocinante, please don't compare Florida to Indiana .... each state can be like a different country sometimes, I've lived in quite a few.

[Kat And Russ 0]

Hi,

My name is Sarah, and I couldn't help but read your posting, and it really touched my heart ..... and brought back many yukky memories of my own from when I used to live in the US many years ago.

Firstly, please don't worry about what negative stuff other people may say to you concerning your feelings about how hard America is ..... many of them (not all) will learn the brutal truth on their own when they get there ....first hand .... just like I did 14 years ago ..... just like my parents before me ..... just like you are now.

My parents infact used to work in England at one point, for some of the year, and benefit from the similar diabolical conversion rate to what we have now, when they returned .... it's the 80's all over again

When I lived there as an adult before, some places in the US didn't even accept an British university degree; it had to go through some conversion system which took ages in New York. In the meantime you would work a crappy job for a minimum wage (I think it's $5 an hour or there abouts now) so you just put basic food on the table.

However, I'm sure that's changed now.

And we Brits complain about our long working hours and low pay .... ha, most don't have a clue!!!! Working in the States will turn you into a proverbial machine ..... and if you return to England with the same work ethic .... you get to the top .... QUICKLY!!! I did!

They really work hard!

My negative memories of America back then were ..... you had to work your a*s off just to make ends meet ... I had many strange jobs while trying to prepare for my new state exams in a subject I was already highly trained and experienced in. And when I moved to another state, I had to do it all over again.

Then the medical insurance subject, which you have brought up ..... that was totally awful!!! ..... I actually brought a letter from my doctor in England, therefore I could get some form of coverage. I don't think that people are aware that real sickness in America, without proper coverage can put you on the streets. I mean HOMELESS!!!!

We may all knock the NHS, but at least you know you'll get treated without a bill for thousands of dollars.

And yes, the US insurance companies policies are really quite alien to us at times, but you will find a way.

At least MRSA isn't such a problem there.

I grew up in Florida as a kid for a while back in the 80's, where my Mum worked as a nurse .... she was horrified to see people who were dying from gun wounds ..... heart attacks ..... and ladies just about to give birth .... were turned away for not having insurance ..... they would have more than likely died. My Mum did the best she could to help.

However, there are free hospitals ..... but few and far between, I would certainly try to locate one as close to you as possible. People may knock Hilary Clinton, but I remember when she tried to change that particular part of the medical system all those years ago when her Husband was President. So there are some states or areas now that will treat you first and bill you later.

Sure, to a lot of people, they think that going to America means a fabulous way of life .... immediately .... and yes, if you're coming from a 3rd world country .... living on the minimum wage, in a run down apartment block, where people die from drive by shootings ..... may be fine to you. But to those coming from countries which are not like that, find it difficult.

Unless you're from Leicester ha ha ..... joke.

Just like the Eastern Block people who come to England thinking that the money they make fom daffodil picking in Cornwall is the equivalent to a fortune back in whatever place they came from. Yet, only students and the unemployed Brits would ever dream of doing such a menial job.

The poverty guidelines given with the Affidavit of Support are no way a reflection of what you'll really need to live on in a lot of places in America ..... to the standard which some of us Brits are used to ..... they are just that ..... poverty guidelines.

Let's not forget that the cost of petrol there is also creeping up ..... it may not be as high as England, but it certainly isn't the 90 cents a gallon it used to be.

Yes, living in America may seem great to those who have never been ..... just look at Baywatch and Friends ..... how cool .... but they forget to tell you, that you will be lucky to get 10 days paid holiday a year with a lot of jobs ..... if you don't sort out your medical insurance, you'd better NOT get sick ...... and the cost of living is not as cheap as you think in some places .... especially parts of Florida.

This time I'm prepared ..... I'm sorting out my education transcripts already ..... and getting ready for my state exams for when I get there.

I love America, don't get me wrong ..... there are many amazing things about America, and I have a lot of loyalty to the country .... I've spent a huge amount of my life there, and growing up in America gave me many skills which enabled me to flourish beyond my wildest dreams when back in the U.K. ..... the education I received at school there was incredible ..... I would definately choose an American school over an English school ...... the teachers I had there actually cared ... and taught me that I could be whatever I wanted to be, I just had had to want it bad enough.

Whereas most schools I attended in England only showed me that unless I was the cream of the crop ..... I was simply a 'nothing'. Confidence is not something I was used to having built in the UK ..... that came from my parents ..... but most of all my American schools. I cannot praise the teachers there highly enough.

Both sides of the Atlantic have their plus points, and their negative points. And even though we speak the same language ..... at times it's as if you're living in Timbuktu ..... you will get used it, I promise.

I too will need to get used to it all over again ..... but I love my Husband sooo much, that I'm happy to return to the US to be with him, and go through the transition again.

My advise at this stage would be to look at what jobs pay good money and check out how to qualify for them ..... community college is cheap in some places ..... and you'll get a great confidence boost from the teachers, they really are helpful.

Don't give up ..... I know it's difficult ..... but, like you said, you fought so hard to get there to be with your Man. There's always a way.

Big hug,

Sarah xx

p.s. I see you're in Florida, I'm going to be in Atlanta for a year when I get there and then we're planning to move to Florida afterwards. I guess life just runs full circle sometimes .... And by the way Rocinante, please don't compare Florida to Indiana .... each state can be like a different country sometimes, I've lived in quite a few.

Sarah Sarah Sarah..... I LOVE YOU :-)

You just made me laugh out loud and then cry, THANK YOU!!

You honestly don't realise how much that post affected me, thank god for people like you!!

I am going to send you my email address though private message hope thats ok... id love to keep in touch... THANKYOU!