TJ 4EVER

Yes reading these post can be very scary..but i like you prayed before getting married and I try to keep faith God will see our marriage thru..Please try to remember that we don't see success stories...and if usc's were on here talking about their marriages to other usc's we would be reading all kinds of terriable things too:)..remember any marriage is hard work..but if we have to climb a mountain ..remember the maker of the mountain is right there beside us:) Good luck in your journey and your marriage

God bless you with your journey as well. I do realize that marriage is hard work...I am willing to climb every mountain if it means making my marriage successful. I guess my heart is too soft...I really feel for those who have been used.

I created a sub Saharan thread called happy endings just so that you would see that there are some marriages that make it. Remember when a sub Saharan marriage goes south it usually does so in a big way. There is a lot of hate and anger and it is easy for the USC to pull the scam card out of the "I hate you deck" Yes there are cases where there was fraud involved but in the horror story side there are a lot of USC's crying scam because it absolves them of any wrong doing in the relationship. Remember you are marrying a Nigerian man and he will never behave like an American no matter how much you try to change him.

Where can I find this thread? thanks for this post. But I must mention, I have no intentions on trying to change my husband. I love him because of who he is not for who i want him to be. I am not foolish, I have lived long enough to know you cannot and should not want to change people. I have become very familiar with the Nigerian culture for years prior to meeting my husband. I have seen the good, bad and indifferent (that what we see in Americans...lol...just in a different setting). I would really like to see that thread though so thanks for suggesting it.

Marriage to a citizen of another country carries the same risks as a marriage between 2 US citizens, plus some additional problems involving cultural differences. The amazing thing to me is how many international marriages do well. I know that for myself I have been very careful not to assume that we share attitudes on anything important without discussing them freely. I think this is the way to have the best chance for success. Actually, I think a long distance relationship can have some advantages in that it takes away the distractions of the physical relationship that so often clouds judgment early in a relationship. But the possibility always remains that one or both partners have been dishonest. In the end there are no guarantees, we are all taking a chance for love. I hope you have good fortune in your relationship! Keep your eyes open but stay optimistic!

I too believe that long distance relationships have its advantages because of physical distractions. I believe it gives the couple the opportunity to truly get to know one another but on the other hand people can hide things about themselves as well. Thank you for your response. I guess I will keep away from the horror stories for the time being.

It is very sad to read those type of post. I tell myself I have done everything I can and will hope for the best, but know that anything is possible and try to prepare myself in my mind for several different situations. I ask myself what would I do if Natoy left me without a word? What if I fall in love with someone else? What if he's secretly gay? I also picture us having a good and happy life so I don't let my fears sabatoge a relationship that I presently enjoy. That seems to help me. Remeber we all take a chance of being hurt when we open our hearts up. I hope none of us get hurt. One also has to remeber that the people with success stories don't post on here much because they have no problems like that. I wish they would though...Just an update on how good things are going.

That's so true, those with the success stories rarely post. I thought about that as well. i too wish there were more post for those who are happily married. Then it can offset some of the horror stories. I know opening our hearts is a risk, I know I must trust in my husband but first and foremost trust in God because I asked him first before making any steps. Thank uyou so much for your words of support. I pray that all goes well with you and yours. Grace and peace to you.

TJ Thank you for this! I agree with you completely!!!

Your welcome...I'm just saying...geesh, enough is enough

I doubt that anyone that enters a marriage legitimately would ever imagine any of those negative stories that we have all read would happen to themselves. May God be with you throughout everything. Do take care.

Thank you for your response and positive thoughts. It just breaks my heart to see those who have entered into their relationship legitimately and later found out they were used. Please don't get me wrong, I believe with all my heart that my husband loves me. we speak everyday and I have NEVER loved any man as much as I love him. I believe that God has answered my prayers. I guess do to human nature to not only see the nightmares that other members are facing but to also feel their pain moved me. I don't want to seem paranoid but those who believed with all their hearts that the love of their life was sincere are now writing stories of heartbreak. It's one thing to have heartbreak because things just did not work out it is a whole different story when it is done out of deception. I feel foolish right now typing this but thought I should just say something oppose to saying nothing.

For the last few days I have been reading post about couples who end up in divorce or worst after going through this expensive and time consuming process. I have read about USC getting married only to find out they have been used. I prayed and fasted before even deciding to date my husband and I love him so very much. I just could not imagine however after going through this whole process a year later me writing on this forum that something bad happened. I guess I don't have a CR1 question and am posting this comment in the wrong place...please forgive me if I am. I am seeking a CR1 visa for my husband, just saying, after reading all of these horror stories I'm feeling pretty sad. For those experiencing it and at the thought that this could be me one day. I know I have to place all my faith and trust in God and I sincerely seeked His face before coming to any conclusion. Am I wrong for my feelings? I just did not realize something that starts off so beautiful can end up being so ugly.

too bad there are no iq tests to get a visa...

that is not what happened; it's all there in the words...

you are still confused about what 'example' means, tsk, tsk.

OMG, visawandering why are you here? You are so arrogant and have shown no humility whatsoever! How do you expect for blessings to come your way if you speak to people with such disrespect? You are reminding me of my 6 year old, when he doesn't get exactly what he wants when he wants it g\he has a little tantrum. You keep asking for examples, time frames, etc. and when you hear something you don't like you throw insults. Whateve game you are playing you need yo stop. You could very well be discouraging newcomers who are greatly in need of this site. ISearch your heart and them seek God's face in there you will find your answer...stop being so mean...

Hi OP,

My heart began to ache as I read your post. First and foremost I am praying for you and your unborn baby. No one deserves to be betrayed the way that it appears that you have been betrayed. I do not have advice in regards to ICE but as for your emotional and spiritual well being if you haven't already I would say take all of your worries and concern to God. I cannot imagine the amount of pain and disappointment you must be experiencing right now. I commend you for reaching out and seeking the support of others (posting your comment). Do not isolate yourself, that would invite depression to creep in. If you have good family support lean on them right now. Someone posted that you should see a doctor, I agree. the amount of stress you could be experiencing will not be good for you or your baby. I would like to be hopeful as I see you are trying to be by hoping there is a reasonable explanation. Unfortunately as it appears (him packing all his belongings) it seems as if he used you to gain a GC. I know for myself, the amount of money, time, blood, sweat and tears it takes to get your spouse.fiancee) over here must make you feel enraged, used and taken for grated. All of what you are feeling is normal and please whatever you do, do not blame yourself for this and do not do the could of, should of because it will only make you feel worse. Continue or start praying and I will keep praying on my end. Follow up with filing a missing persons report. Check his cellphone records, email accounts or any other social networks he could have been using. Perhaps you will get the answers you are looking for. God bless you, keep your head up and if you need to keep reaching out, keep posting, we are here for you.

I don't know my fathers birthday and I don't know where he is i put Unknown on both of thos and never got an RFE. Maybe your RFE is for something else.

Didn't receive a RFE, just hoping that I won't but thank you so much, your experience gives me hope.

Thanks do much everyone. I did not receive an RFE I am just concerned that perhaps I may because they would want more info on my father, information the unfortunately I can not supply to them because I do not know many people on my father's side of the family and he passed in 190, so actually wow he has been gone for over 21 years. Again thanks so much for your quick responses, I will keep postive.

It just occurred to me that I might be receiving a RFE because I DO NOT know my Father's date of birth. On my I-130 application I put unknown for my father's date of birth. He is dead now and has been dead for over a decade and I never really knew him. In your opinion (anyone) will I be scrutinized for this?

Hi,

I read in a different forum that a couple (actually it was the woman who had the interview) applied for the CR1 visa was asked at the interview to provide a paternity test for their child. Not saying and am praying that this doesn't happen in your case I am just stating this because this request caught the couple off guard. This happened at the Jamaican Embassy (I think). it is a recent post, you could research it if you like in the CR1 forum. I pray all goes well and think that you have good evidence.

I have been searching the web site for the fees associated with packet IV and the finacial support and for the life of me I can't find it. Does anyone know the fees...just trying to make sure I have the funds saveed. Thank you

Sorry to hear about that..do you use your cell phone to call him via calling cards? If so you can subpoena the records especially if you don't keep your statements. I have to do the same as I called my carrier and was told the only way to release the records is to subpoena them.

Also your husband can get his call records from Nigeria as well he just have to go to the call center of his carrier.

OP...I am sorry to hear about what happen, God is able. I have contacted my cell phone company and asked them to send me past phone records and henceforth send me a detailed biull each month. I also contacted my landline company and they said I would have to complete a letter equesting the records and they can send them. My question is I always called mt husband via phone card therefore tthe calling card will be the number that shows up that is called. Will the accept that? It is entirely too expensive to call directly. I am new to this and will not be getting a NOA2 for a while but do not want to scramble at the end. I'm rambling sorry...but will they accept the calling card records as proof?

casablansa us embassy in morocco

case close december 17

Congraduations...grace and peace to you

Amen...well said;-)

I am feeling your pain and wish this process was easier. I prayer that God gives you peace and patience. God knows we all need it. Keep you head up and know God is in control and is able. I pray u have a peaceful nights rest, grace and peace to you.

I pray for 3 to 4 months...sounds so much better then 5. My husband is confident that we will receive the NOA2 by my next visit which will be in late march. Perhaps I can gather the paperwork neccesary for the next step. God bless everyone...glad I am taking this journey with you.

Thank u so much

Gonna sit back and relax and contemplate how awesome Australia is.

No mystery why the beer has big cans, though!

Going to 7 p.m. service at church, then heading home and at 11:30 p.m. will be on my knees giving God thanks for all He has done and asking for His favor in regards to all we will be facing in the New Year. At midnight I will be calling my husband so that we can then pray together as well. Happy New Year to you all, grace and peace to you and I pray for Godspeed for your process to be complete...Amen

My case starts with WAC....so is California a very slow place? I've seen some posts that indicates they are backed up.

I sent my I-130 to Chicago, I live in Pa...I assume Chicago routes petitions to the proper service center but how can I find out which one? I did send it to the right place correct? Oh I did receive my NOA1 dated 12/16

Now I like that talk...the last New Year we have to spend without our spouses...Amen. my date is 12/16. I posted in another December thread...Happy New Year

Thanks u so much...that news made my night