Brad and Vika

I think it is just an individual preference. My wife is on the fence. She wouldn't mind having an American passport for travel. Right now she needs a visa for lots of places I can go, and vice versa. Giving up Ukrainian citizenship will really screw up her property rights, and have negative tax implications in Ukraine though. We aren't sure what to do.

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VJ Moderation Team

We did a K-1 and had no trouble, but I agree with PB and the others that considering where you are applying, a spousal visa may be easier for you. Good luck and welcome.

Nairobi can be a really difficult and tough Embassy...I strongly urge you to read through the entire Nairobi Embassy Thread which you can find here: http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/160251-nairobi-embassy-thread/ and also read through all of the reviews for the Nairobi Embassy which you can find here: http://www.visajourney.com/reviews/index.php?cnty=Kenya&cty=&dfilter=5. You need to be prepared and Karibu for the encouraging words. Stay blessed.

I spent most of the day one-on-one with my nine week old today. Vika and MIL were at a girlfriend's house for a day filled with Ukrainian food and gossip. Two feedings, three diaper changes, several naps (hers), and lots of rocking and baby talk (mine ) later, I am feeling pretty tired. More tired than I remember last time, twenty years ago . At least my memory appears not to have suffered over time.
Watching my wife and MIL walking around with my daughter as we wind down the weekend got me thinking. It is easy sometimes for me to forget the risk she took coming to my country. She didn't do it to take care of her kids, or get a green card, or provide for her family back home. This is her home, and she came here to be with me. That is commitment, and even more amazingly her entire side of the family got behind it.
When I was still in the middle of the process somewhere, it was pretty frustrating at times reading all the posts about delays and problems with documents, USCIS, NVC, or the State Dept. Not to mention all the weirdness around members posting about the personal details of their relationships, their relationship problems, or their SO's body parts.
If you are still in the process, take my advice. Don't sweat the small issues, and keep your eye on the prize. The prize I am talking about is a strong family, and the life that comes with it.

I spent most of the day one-on-one with my nine week old today. Vika and MIL were at a girlfriend's house for a day filled with Ukrainian food and gossip. Two feedings, three diaper changes, several naps (hers), and lots of rocking and baby talk (mine ) later, I am feeling pretty tired. More tired than I remember last time, twenty years ago . At least my memory appears not to have suffered over time.
Watching my wife and MIL walking around with my daughter as we wind down the weekend got me thinking. It is easy sometimes for me to forget the risk she took coming to my country. She didn't do it to take care of her kids, or get a green card, or provide for her family back home. This is her home, and she came here to be with me. That is commitment, and even more amazingly her entire side of the family got behind it.
When I was still in the middle of the process somewhere, it was pretty frustrating at times reading all the posts about delays and problems with documents, USCIS, NVC, or the State Dept. Not to mention all the weirdness around members posting about the personal details of their relationships, their relationship problems, or their SO's body parts.
If you are still in the process, take my advice. Don't sweat the small issues, and keep your eye on the prize. The prize I am talking about is a strong family, and the life that comes with it.

I agree that age difference is not a good indicator of compatability (my wife and I have seventeen years age difference), but I think the OP is asking a procedural question. From what I have read on VJ over the years, it seems like it depends on the embassy, the amount of visa fraud in the beneficiary's country, and the culture of that country. So in a culture where men don't normally marry women that are much older than they are, the CO can make the visa petition an uphill climb.
To the OP - yes it is possible. If I recall correctly you will need a waiver if you file again within two years, assuming this was your first petition. Some one will no doubt correct me if that has changed. Good luck to you.

I feel a rant coming on
I have heard a few tales as well, though not from the wife. I met a woman from Odessa once, that married a guy who worked nights. She met him a couple of times, brought her son here trusting him, and wound up trapped in the country with no vehicle, limited English, and no husband unless she wanted to sleep during the day. When she told him after a couple of years (right before LOC) that she couldn't continue to live like that, he dropped her and her son off in front of a police station and told her they would help her. The shelter she wound up in helped her with LOC and divorce. She cleans houses now.
Now I only got her side of the story, but it is the kind of stuff retold as a warning back in Ukraine, Vika says. Something like "that smart city girl with the child psych degree married a guy overseas, and look what happened. You have lived your whole life in this village, are you crazy?".
There can be some misunderstanding, and I also think that there is a fair amount of fantasy marketing involved sometimes - for men and women. The unfortunate, the lonely, the bitter, are all told that the relationship and the family they have always dreamed about is just around the corner. Whatever your interest, we have the perfect match, and for a mere $6,000 we will take you there, trim your nails, shine your shoes, and make the intro. We will even provide some one to help you talk to each other! What could possibly go wrong?
Oh sure it is, because.... well because. Sure, fat old bald guys never fall in love with swimsuit model home makers here, but over THERE, it happens all the time. And for a trivial $400 per month....
Again, I think what I wrote above applies to women as well as men, and there is no right or wrong way to meet your better half. I totally get that the intro services (virtual and brick n' mortar) are businesses, and sometimes have well intentioned people behind them. The more I hear, the more cruel I think the marketing can be sometimes though.
Rant over, sorry.

I feel a rant coming on
I have heard a few tales as well, though not from the wife. I met a woman from Odessa once, that married a guy who worked nights. She met him a couple of times, brought her son here trusting him, and wound up trapped in the country with no vehicle, limited English, and no husband unless she wanted to sleep during the day. When she told him after a couple of years (right before LOC) that she couldn't continue to live like that, he dropped her and her son off in front of a police station and told her they would help her. The shelter she wound up in helped her with LOC and divorce. She cleans houses now.
Now I only got her side of the story, but it is the kind of stuff retold as a warning back in Ukraine, Vika says. Something like "that smart city girl with the child psych degree married a guy overseas, and look what happened. You have lived your whole life in this village, are you crazy?".
There can be some misunderstanding, and I also think that there is a fair amount of fantasy marketing involved sometimes - for men and women. The unfortunate, the lonely, the bitter, are all told that the relationship and the family they have always dreamed about is just around the corner. Whatever your interest, we have the perfect match, and for a mere $6,000 we will take you there, trim your nails, shine your shoes, and make the intro. We will even provide some one to help you talk to each other! What could possibly go wrong?
Oh sure it is, because.... well because. Sure, fat old bald guys never fall in love with swimsuit model home makers here, but over THERE, it happens all the time. And for a trivial $400 per month....
Again, I think what I wrote above applies to women as well as men, and there is no right or wrong way to meet your better half. I totally get that the intro services (virtual and brick n' mortar) are businesses, and sometimes have well intentioned people behind them. The more I hear, the more cruel I think the marketing can be sometimes though.
Rant over, sorry.

How is lawyer going to help?
She has been living illegally and that is the truth….next time when ppl wonder why they are given hard time at POE even when they are genuine… here is the reason.
I am not sure why she cannot return back to her home country where her family and friends are, she does not have to leave the kid in the foster care as suggested by the OP.
Kid can be taken to Italy and can grow up there with mother and atleast rest of her family.
I never understand why ppl think its rude when they ask ppl who entered the country illegally to return back to their country?

I agree. If he already disclosed that he has been living with a USC that he intends to marry, and he gets the student visa anyway, no harm, no foul. I would guess though, that if anybody actually read that he intended to marry the USC in the application it may cause questions, if not a problem with the F visa. If no one asks, he will be covered when he applies for a green card later (just save a copy of the application disclosure).

Ok, thank you guys for all your help. I have decided to withdraw the petition and move forward with my life. It is hard and sad, but i have to do what i think is best for me. Thanks again for all your kind comments and if i need anymore help along these lines, i know this is the site to come. Kathryn you can close this topic, I do not wish to further discuss, especially when people are telling me that my story doesn't add up. I didn't come here to make up stories and get comments questioning my honesty, i came here for help. I have received help and now i am in the process of putting it to good use. Thank you guys again. Goodbye.
-Kristina

You've now answered just fine, IMO. Also, to answer the question in your subject line, all indications are that yes, your fiance is a fraud.

That last bit might be a little strong, but

Any updates from the OP? This is a story that some of us have seen reprinted here in one form or another quite a bit. If I am understanding, the non-USC wanted to follow her daughter home, then decided to stay to adjust status, and then wanted to be paid to leave before AOS? No VAWA claim? That would be a blessing.
Thanks to all the other members that posted about their own issues. It really helps some of the newbies puzzle out what is happening in their own journey at times to hear similar accounts.

I see a lot of problems in RUB marriages occur because the partners didn't know each other and had little face time before marrying or becoming engaged. I visited Tanya 5 or 6 times in quick succession before we got engaged. I am curious about what others did as well.

Our daughter was born in June, and because of concern about attracting the evil eye, I was just given permission to let the information out. She is awesome, we are thrilled (but tired). In-laws are all ecstatic! This is why getting MIL here was such a big deal for us

Our daughter was born in June, and because of concern about attracting the evil eye, I was just given permission to let the information out. She is awesome, we are thrilled (but tired). In-laws are all ecstatic! This is why getting MIL here was such a big deal for us

Our daughter was born in June, and because of concern about attracting the evil eye, I was just given permission to let the information out. She is awesome, we are thrilled (but tired). In-laws are all ecstatic! This is why getting MIL here was such a big deal for us

I would counsel patience here, lots of it. My wife had been here before and STILL had some adjustment issues. Her best girlfriend said that three years is a good time period for full comfort. First year you miss EVERYTHING about back home, and spend time getting used to doing without most of the people and things you love there. Second year, you are OK, but feel torn between two homes now, and still need to reach a comfort level with all things American. Third year, you make your peace with the new culture, it doesn't feel strange now, and you settle into (you hope) happiness.
A certain amount of hysterics early on comes with the territory.

I am not sure what USCIS, NVC, and consular officers can see when they run a record check. I would be forthcoming about all charges, and state that it was nine years ago, and that you want to be honest, even if it doesn't come up on a records check. That way you are covered if a record of the original charges pops up anywhere. You will definitely have a problem if they think there is less disclosure than required.
Just to be safe, you may want to change your VJ handle. There have been some posts on vj that consular officers and others do look at VJ. I presume any CO in Cambodia would know what you mean, but no sense inviting a misunderstanding.

An additional step or two to maybe help you along.
1) Hopefully, you have a copy of EVERYTHING you sent.
2) If so, I would probably make an appointment online with your nearest USCIS field office. You don't have to give specifics when you make the appointment. When you get there, show them what you sent initially, and what you sent recently. Make sure you have your affadavits, proofs, intent letters with you. They may take copies, or they may send a notice to the service center that they have seen the proofs and they are on the way. In other words the adjudicator at the service center will be able to see the field office entry for your case, and won't just be looking at the partial information. They can also tell you if there is an RFE or denial you haven'tseen yet.
Good Luck

I would say no, don't send anything too intimate. Send a selection of email that show contact over time, that's it.

Welcome aboard!

People have more audacity when they are hiding behind a monitor
and tend to be bolder than if they are face to face
Almost hiding behind a safe persona and I guarantee most of the smack talking (posting) people cannot stand up for themselves in real life.
I also read another post where paramedic put it correctly that one person starts and the rest of the older VJ member join in and gang up on posters and this is lack of backbone...I agreed silenty with him then too.
Dont know if pertains to this thread but I do get it where he is coming from and tend to agree with him
utube or not analogy...
In real life he would earn my respect by the way he can kick your #### in a few hundred ways but doesnt need to post harshly against others to prove he is tough.
just my observation.