rika60607

Phil,
if you two do not get along and you are not happy with each other... Is it important who's fault it is and who might have what sickness and what the reasons are? I did not get impression that you were madly in love with each other ever...
Don't get married. Buy her tickets to get home and make sure you restore everything for her back to pre-Phil days as much as you can. That would be a kind and reasonable thing to do.
Why would you want to get married and continue to hurt each other??? If you don't fit together, then you don't fit together.

...and you are about to lose a son. A good one.
He came up with 11 pm estimate because he knew you would not let him go if he gave you a realistic estimate of the time when he would come home. He is not a small child nor an aging man who can not handle the day at school/work after a sleepless night, so that's no excuse. He is not stealing alcohol like you did. Yes, pot comes with territory and you were right to stop it, but let me tell you... as soon as he moves out of your house he'll do it again. Not because of music and people he hangs out with, but because it is easy to get these days, all cool people do it and just as soon as he does not have to follow your rules, he won't. Why? Because enforcing rules does nothing for a kid that old. Grounding a 15 yo is not effective and will lead to anguish, nothing more.
Late night practice comes with a territory when you play rock with older guys. You should have known it and you should have been realistic, you are the adult after all. Yet you still have to learn to treat your son as an adult, or you will not see adult behavior from him in a looong time. For now, you are teaching him that you can't be trusted (truth gets one grounded and desired things get forbidden) or respected (your behavior is not logical and/or consistent).

If he entered on K-1 visa and is still waiting for AOS to be approved, you can call AND write to USCIS AND make InfoPass appointment - all that to make sure that you withdraw your affidavit of support formally and before he gets approved.
Then get a divorce.
Good luck, this is no life to live.

I'm amazed to see that people still directly respond to Paul. Really, amazing.

Not only this is irrelevant to the topic, but also very weird. You do know that Obamacare appeared looong after the problems with healthcare developed and that very little of Obamacare is in force by now? May be you live on another planet
The issue with this guy is that he is gay and that is why he would be facing deportation. Was one of the couple a female or if the federal law was changed to recognize gay marriages, he'd be home safe. He did not enter illegally and he is married to a USC. The only thing standing between him and a GC is that fact that he's gay. So he should get to stay, otherwise this is a case of discrimination based on sexual orientation, which is already banned pretty much everywhere in the US.
Illegals should be deported, although I'd like to see a more humane system than ICE detention when it comes to non-criminals.

If you think their life is so swell, why don't you join them?
It's easy. Give away all your possessions to your family members and friends and quit your job (unless you are already retired).
Voila, enjoy doing whatever you want on the government buck
you may find out that this kind of life just ain't as sweet as you imagined it

Fine. But you are a single person. Not a parent with children. I am also sure you weren't ill. Most people who are in situational poverty are not in it for the long term. That is why it is called situational poverty. A situation has taken place, which temporarily puts them in a vulnerable position. I don't see how creating a 3rd World environment creates a better situation for a country. And what about prisoners? Aren't they on hard times? Yet, they have a place to stay and food to eat and medical expenses paid for.

Not only this is irrelevant to the topic, but also very weird. You do know that Obamacare appeared looong after the problems with healthcare developed and that very little of Obamacare is in force by now? May be you live on another planet
The issue with this guy is that he is gay and that is why he would be facing deportation. Was one of the couple a female or if the federal law was changed to recognize gay marriages, he'd be home safe. He did not enter illegally and he is married to a USC. The only thing standing between him and a GC is that fact that he's gay. So he should get to stay, otherwise this is a case of discrimination based on sexual orientation, which is already banned pretty much everywhere in the US.
Illegals should be deported, although I'd like to see a more humane system than ICE detention when it comes to non-criminals.

step in the right direction

Yes, I do. I would if I was a single mom. Wouldn't you care for your children's health regardless of your baby momma's presence?
They system is flawed, for sure, but it should not be cancelled altogether and this whole idea of people on welfare having such great awesome easy lives is entirely bogus.

Not only this is irrelevant to the topic, but also very weird. You do know that Obamacare appeared looong after the problems with healthcare developed and that very little of Obamacare is in force by now? May be you live on another planet
The issue with this guy is that he is gay and that is why he would be facing deportation. Was one of the couple a female or if the federal law was changed to recognize gay marriages, he'd be home safe. He did not enter illegally and he is married to a USC. The only thing standing between him and a GC is that fact that he's gay. So he should get to stay, otherwise this is a case of discrimination based on sexual orientation, which is already banned pretty much everywhere in the US.
Illegals should be deported, although I'd like to see a more humane system than ICE detention when it comes to non-criminals.

He's a nice kid trying to meet your expectations, but he does not have a car so has to depend on other (unreliable) kids.
You have to decide - what's worse, lying or making unrealistic promises. If you told him it's okay to come home by 6 am, he'd not have to lie

He entered legally from what I've read.

Yeah, and better not breath a word about "helping with a grandchild" - her tourist visa would be automatically denied, as it is illegal to help with the grandchildren in the US if grandparent is not work-authorized.

If you think their life is so swell, why don't you join them?
It's easy. Give away all your possessions to your family members and friends and quit your job (unless you are already retired).
Voila, enjoy doing whatever you want on the government buck
you may find out that this kind of life just ain't as sweet as you imagined it

step in the right direction

You seem to equate poverty with hereditary lack of education/talent.
It is not so.
Van Gogh was poor all his life, but he had talent, and how much are his paintings worth now?
In our days, an artist or a single mother with a PhD in something can very easily be poor, yet have excellent genes and produce very successful and educated offspring.
On the other hand, plenty of middle class and above, are really worthless as far as genetic material and child upbringing goes...
So there. Who will be the judge of worthiness? And what if a fantastic child could be born to two morons due to rare genetic combination?

You seem to equate poverty with hereditary lack of education/talent.
It is not so.
Van Gogh was poor all his life, but he had talent, and how much are his paintings worth now?
In our days, an artist or a single mother with a PhD in something can very easily be poor, yet have excellent genes and produce very successful and educated offspring.
On the other hand, plenty of middle class and above, are really worthless as far as genetic material and child upbringing goes...
So there. Who will be the judge of worthiness? And what if a fantastic child could be born to two morons due to rare genetic combination?

You seem to equate poverty with hereditary lack of education/talent.
It is not so.
Van Gogh was poor all his life, but he had talent, and how much are his paintings worth now?
In our days, an artist or a single mother with a PhD in something can very easily be poor, yet have excellent genes and produce very successful and educated offspring.
On the other hand, plenty of middle class and above, are really worthless as far as genetic material and child upbringing goes...
So there. Who will be the judge of worthiness? And what if a fantastic child could be born to two morons due to rare genetic combination?

If you think their life is so swell, why don't you join them?
It's easy. Give away all your possessions to your family members and friends and quit your job (unless you are already retired).
Voila, enjoy doing whatever you want on the government buck
you may find out that this kind of life just ain't as sweet as you imagined it

You seem to equate poverty with hereditary lack of education/talent.
It is not so.
Van Gogh was poor all his life, but he had talent, and how much are his paintings worth now?
In our days, an artist or a single mother with a PhD in something can very easily be poor, yet have excellent genes and produce very successful and educated offspring.
On the other hand, plenty of middle class and above, are really worthless as far as genetic material and child upbringing goes...
So there. Who will be the judge of worthiness? And what if a fantastic child could be born to two morons due to rare genetic combination?

If you think their life is so swell, why don't you join them?
It's easy. Give away all your possessions to your family members and friends and quit your job (unless you are already retired).
Voila, enjoy doing whatever you want on the government buck
you may find out that this kind of life just ain't as sweet as you imagined it

If you think their life is so swell, why don't you join them?
It's easy. Give away all your possessions to your family members and friends and quit your job (unless you are already retired).
Voila, enjoy doing whatever you want on the government buck
you may find out that this kind of life just ain't as sweet as you imagined it

If you think their life is so swell, why don't you join them?
It's easy. Give away all your possessions to your family members and friends and quit your job (unless you are already retired).
Voila, enjoy doing whatever you want on the government buck
you may find out that this kind of life just ain't as sweet as you imagined it

You seem to equate poverty with hereditary lack of education/talent.
It is not so.
Van Gogh was poor all his life, but he had talent, and how much are his paintings worth now?
In our days, an artist or a single mother with a PhD in something can very easily be poor, yet have excellent genes and produce very successful and educated offspring.
On the other hand, plenty of middle class and above, are really worthless as far as genetic material and child upbringing goes...
So there. Who will be the judge of worthiness? And what if a fantastic child could be born to two morons due to rare genetic combination?