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It is Sunday -- time for our highly effective* Official Weekly VAWA-Thread Joke:
   *in evoking approvals, if correlation = causation
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ONE-LINERS
 
If you ever get cold, just stand in a corner for a while.  They're usually about 90 degrees.
 
Did you hear about the two guys who stole a calendar?  They each got 6 months.
 
My grandpa has the heart of a lion... and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
 
What's something that's red and bad for your teeth?  A brick.
 
I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.  It's just something that I could really see myself doing.
 
What do you call a sleepwalking nun?  A roamin' Catholic.
 
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?  Because the "P" is silent.
 
Two fish are in a tank.  One is driving and the other is operating the gun.
Two soldiers are in a tank.  They both drown.
 
What's orange and sounds like a parrot?  A carrot.
 

It is Wednesday, and therefore time for our Semiofficial Semiweekly VAWA-Thread Joke:
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JUST A SMALL WHITE DOT (?)
 
A kindergarten class had a homework assignment to find out something exciting and relate it to the class the next day.
 
When the time came to present what they'd found, the first little boy whom the teacher called on walked to the front of the class, took a piece of chalk, made a small white dot on the blackboard, and sat back down.
 
Puzzled, the teacher asked him what it was.
 
"It's a period," he replied.
 
"I can see that," said the teacher, "but what is so exciting about a period?"
 
"Darned if I know," said the little boy, "but this morning my sister was missing one, my mother fainted, my dad had a heart attack, and the boy next door joined the Navy!"
 

@TBoneTX Couldn't resist to post joke here. Missed you when read this joke. 
 
Hi Family, hope everyone doing great. 
Have a question, My EAD/AP expiring in May 2022. I will be filing renewal in Jan 2022. I filed my VAWA in May 2020. Now, If my VAWA will get approved before C-09 EAD/AP approval, will they reject my EAD/AP with C09? If they reject my renewal and VAWA will get approve, can i still file for renewal of C09 later? C-31 do not provide AP. TIA, god bless you, May god give strength to all of us in process. 
 
Bless you all @sandranj, @Demise, Perk, @shiva, and all those helping us in need, are gods favorite child. ❤️ 

Thanksgiving is Thursday.
 
Those here who have received approval or are about to can give thanks.
Those here who are praying for the above and for other things can give thanks.
Those here who rely on the support of others here can give thanks.
Those here who are struggling but are alive, well, and safe can give thanks.
Those of us (like me) not personally involved in VAWA can give thanks -- and I do:
Thank you all for being you.

UPDATEEEE!!!
 

 
I had my interview today and... THE OFFICER SAID RIGHT AWAY THAT MY CASE HAS BEEN APPROVED! I SHOULD RECEIVE THE GREEN CARD WITHING 2 WEEKS!!!
The nightmare is over guys!
It is a week before my birthday and I couldn't wish for anything else .... thank you for your good wishes, prayers and support! 
Do NOT BE SCARED! Just be patient! 😘❤️ 
 
Thank you! I needed it! 
 
 
Good luck honey! You are gonna kill it!   I did my Med Exam on Wednesday, November 17th and It was ready on Saturday, it takes only few days
 

UPDATE!!!!

GC is coming!!! I have no words but thank you, thank you, thank you for this forum and for all the wonderful people who are here to help!!!! Thank you @sandranj!!!! Thank you @TBoneTX @FeDaniela @Stillwinning!!!😊 And to all other members who helped me in my journey. I can’t mention you all but a big thanks from the bottom of my heart!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Hi everyone,
how long does it take for 485 to transfer to NBC, once Vawa is approved (on average)? Mine has finally been approved after “new card being produced” status.
thanks! 

It is Sunday -- time for our Official Weekly VAWA-Thread Joke that evokes approvals and positive progress* and at least lifts our spirits:
      *that is, if correlation = causation
 
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THE OLD MAN AND THE PRICEY RING
 
An older white-haired man walked into a jewelry store one Friday evening with a beautiful young girl at his side.  He told the jeweler that he wanted a special ring for his girlfriend.
 
The jeweler looked through his stock and found a $5,000 ring.  The older man said, "No; I'd like to see something much more special."
 
The jeweler went to his special stock in the safe and brought another ring back.  "This one's $40,000," he said.  The young lady's eyes sparkled and her entire body trembled with excitement.  The older man said, "I'll take it!"
 
The jeweler asked how payment would be made, and the older man said, "By check, but I know that you need to make sure that my check is good, so I'll write it now, and you can call the bank on Monday to verify the funds.  I'll pick up the ring on Monday afternoon."
 
On Monday morning, the jeweler called the older man and said, "There's no money in that account!"
 
The older man said, "I know, I know -- but let me tell you about the weekend I just had!"
 

"The squeaky wheel gets the grease."
"We rarely get what we don't ask for."
 

It is Wednesday, and therefore time for our Semiofficial Semiweekly VAWA-Thread Joke*:
    *proven to evoke approvals and progress, if correlation = causation
=========================================
LITTLE JOHNNY AND THE PSYCHOLOGY QUESTION
 
          A new teacher was trying to make use of her college Psychology courses.  She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks he's stupid, stand up!"
          After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up.
          The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Johnny?"
          "No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself."
 

Good morning all my Vawa family,  it  has being awhile since I touch base with you all, but I have not forgotten all the love and support that this forum have  given me, you guys were amazing @Stillwinning!!!😊 big up your damn self💖 , you give us hope many times,  my process was long and at times frustrating   but thank god it has come to an end July 2021.
Just a little update I have given birth to my beautiful bungle of joy my daughter❤❤❤ which have kept me so busy...I just want to say for all who are still waiting,  your time will come , it may seems long but believe me it will happen..🙌❤ so you all keep safe be blessed and have a wonderful day...#HeartofLove💖❤

Our Official VAWA-Thread Jokes are known to evoke  bring about  are correlated with approvals and positive case news.  Here, therefore, is our most recent Official Sunday VAWA-Thread joke:
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AN OUNCE OF BRAIN
 
A man was lying in the hospital, waiting to be the first person in history to receive a brain transplant.
 
A doctor came in and said, "Congratulations!  But unfortunately, because this is a new procedure, your insurance isn't going to cover it all.  Therefore, we're going to give you 3 choices of brains, and you can decide which you can afford."
 
"OK -- what are they?" the man asked the doctor.
 
The doctor said, "Well, first, there's engineer brain, which is $100 an ounce.  Then, there's astrophysicist brain; that will cost you $200 an ounce.  Finally, there's politician brain.  That's the most expensive at $1,000 an ounce."
 
The man looked at the doctor, surprised, and said, "That's absurd!  Why is the politician brain so expensive?"
 
The doctor looked seriously at him and said, "Sir, do you have any idea how MANY politicians it takes to get an ounce of brain?"
 

Our Semiweekly Semiofficial VAWA-Thread Joke worked well indeed.  Here is the Weekly Official VAWA-Thread Joke:
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THE YEARS WE HAVE
 
When God created the dog, He said: "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past.  For this, I will give you a lifespan of 20 years." 
 
The dog replied, "That's a long time to be barking.  How about only 10 years and I'll give You back the other 10?"
 
And God saw that it was good.
 
When God created the monkey, He said, "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh.  For this, I'll give you a 20-year lifespan."
 
The monkey said, "Monkey tricks for 20 years?  That's a pretty long time to perform.  How about I give You back 10 like the dog did?"
 
And God, again, saw that it was good.
 
When God created the cow, He said, "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long, work under the sun, have calves, and give milk to support the farmer's family.  For this, I will give you a lifespan of 60 years."
 
The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life You want me to live for 60 years.  How about 20, and I'll give back the other 40?"
 
And God agreed that it was good.
 
When God created man, He said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry, and enjoy your life.  For this, I'll give you 20 years."
 
But man said, "Only 20 years?  Could You possibly give me my 20 plus the 40 the cow gave back, the 10 the monkey gave back, and the 10 the dog gave back?  That makes 80 years, OK?"
 
God agreed.  And that is why for our first 20 years, we eat, sleep, play, and enjoy ourselves.  For the next 40 years, we slave in the sun to support our family.  For the next 10 years, we look like a wizened monkey and do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last 10 years, we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.
 

Hoorah!      
[T-B. makes note to self:  joke worked again... joke worked again...]

Omg my i485 status updated to “Approved” today. I had my interview in San Francisco yesterday!

I have some here that I'm spilling on top of my joke list, which worked again.    
Super news -- congratulations.   

Hi everyone! Received an email today, what kind of instructions do they send with I-485 notice? Is it biometrics again? Thanks

May whoever comments on this thread and has a pending application, get an approval before the thread closes.
Amen!
Can I get more Amens pls 😃

Hello guys,
 
just received this update, anyone have an idea what can it be? A month ago I sent my answer for request for more evidence. 
 
thank you

Congratulations to everyone receiving approvals, really happy to see you all getting through, 
 
@TBoneTX It seems USCIS reads your jokes chuckles, says "that was good one" and hit approve for case they are working on, These are not jokes, these are magical spell you are doing to get us approval, not less than angel/wizard. God bless you, 

It is Sunday, and time for our Official Weekly VAWA-Thread Joke (presumed, if correlation = causation, to evoke approvals and positive progress in cases)*:
*this one is a bit on the edge
======================================
ANY MORE QUESTIONS?
 
A small American Indian boy approached his mother.  "Mother, how do Indian children get their names?" he asked.
 
"How?" said the mother.  "Indian children named for events at time of their birth.  Older brother named 'Soaring Eagle.'  Older sister named 'Rushing Stream.'  Any more questions, Two Dogs Mating?"
 

The semiweekly joke worked fast and well -- man, oh man, oh man!   

Goo morning everybody ! 
There is an update in my I-360 today . What does this mean ? 
New card is being produced !! This is not i-765
 

It is Wednesday, signifying the time for our approval-evoking, progress-encouraging, spirit-lifting Semiweekly Semiofficial VAWA-Thread Joke:
=======================================
THE ENGINEERS AND THE BUSTED CAR
 
A Mechanical Engineer, an Electrical Engineer, a Chemical Engineer, and a Computer Engineer were driving down the street in the same car.  All of a sudden, the car broke down.
 
The Mechanical Engineer said, "I think a rod broke."
 
The Chemical Engineer said, "The way it sputtered at the end, I don't think it's getting gas."
 
The Electrical Engineer said, "I think there was a spark and something is wrong with the electrical system."
 
All three turned to the Computer Engineer and said, "What do you think?"
 
The Computer Engineer said, "I think we should all get out and get back in."
 

Guys!!!!! My I-360 was approved yesterday.
I am so happy. Getting closer to the end of this long  journey. Thank you everyone on this platform., you guys are the BEST!!
 
I-360, I-485 was received  Nov 8 2019
RFE for good moral character was received Dec 11 2019
RFE response was received Feb 4 2020
First PF was sent to me March 2020
PF renewal was not sent to me automatically but I applied for it around May 2021