Tips and Techniques for Handling "The Wait"

[kerewin21 2]

I also found that being busy was the best cure.... The months when I was working 80 hours a week and trying to move were the easiest, the ones where I wasn't doing that much were the hardest. But I fortunately only had to wait about 6 months from my application to my fiance getting the visa, I think longer must be much harder.

Definitely try to go out with friends, avoid couples (that was always what made me the saddest), and definitely embark on projects that you want to get done before your SO gets here, like making improvements to the house and things like that.

Edited April 13, 2006 by kerewin21

[dollface41601 0]

I couldnt cope....so i packed my belongings and waited with him until his visa was issued.....most people probably do not have that opprotunity but i took it

[jordanianprincess 0]

I couldnt cope....so i packed my belongings and waited with him until his visa was issued.....most people probably do not have that opprotunity but i took it

That thought has crossed my mind on so many occasions!

[iceyspots 0]

workaholic and obesessing over my grades at school

[Together4ever 1]

Does anyone on here do any writing? I vent via poetry. I can be pretty cathartic to sit and shape and paint your feelings with words until they become some external thing you can manage and they don't take you over anymore.

[Together4ever 1]

Does anyone on here do any writing? I vent via poetry. I can be pretty cathartic to sit and shape and paint your feelings with words until they become some external thing you can manage and they don't take you over anymore.

"When the gates of my life opened,

the paths I would wander were only a dream.

Slowly, the dream materialized into a reality,

but in that reality there was always a void.

My life was just a life. Then I met you and I became whole.

We walked the paths together.

Hand and hand you gave me joy of the simple things.

Your presence and love helped shape me

into the person I only dreamed I could be.

Now I stand in the rain and remember your touch.

Each day the sun greets me as your eyes did.

I hear your laughter in the song of the birds...

and I remember you as if you were standing before me again.

Life brought us together and led us apart again,

but I can never forget the beauty we shared.

You will always remain a part of me

until that day the dream again becomes reality

and again we walk hand in hand."

[honeyblonde 0]

Rebecca is right, I did honestly question her love for Rafie. Now that I look back I think she actually was probably one of the best prepared people for a new marriage that I know. She didn't have utopia in mind, she was quite aware of all the changes she would have to deal with.

For me, the wait wasn't quite long enough. My GPA suffered the worst blow it ever got that semester and when Abdel got here about 3 weeks before finals, the guilt of not having enough time to spend with him made things even worse. Fighting with my mother about my wedding - our first exchange of harsh words in so many years I can't remember when - was also incredibly stressful.

I work a very stressful job, but only 40 hours, and was taking 3 very hard classes. Like others said, who had time to even think about things? Add to that the fact that Abdel and I somehow managed to spend 2 to 4 hours each night on webcams on yahoo messenger, and there was no time to think about the wait. He reviewed my papers for school, helped me search for sources and listened to me explaining economics. He taught me about the legal and economic systems of Morocco, and introduced me to his favorite writers and philosophers. We really didn't feel so apart, only physically.

If you can focus on the mental part of your relationship and just decide that the physical can wait, the time won't go by so slow.

[Yasi 0]

At first, I used to write to him a lot, but just for myself... I didn’t mail him the letters, a few I did... It helped me stay close to him and organize my thoughts...

When I didn't work, we talked every 2-3 days sometimes for 2-3 hours... this helped too... I'm also busy with school... I'm finishing this May, but now working...I plan to make a list what I can do before he comes... I spend time with family and friends...but most of my friends are married and it is sooooooo hard at our gatherings...I'm (with the expectation of another person) the only one w/o my other half... Nights are especially hard since I can't call him...it's early morning there...I pray at nights and if my best friend is available talk to her on the phone....

I saw him last January

Yasi