using the system

[eric1228 0]

Hey All,

I have a concern that I don't see mentioned too often on here, but I'm hoping several will have an opinion about...

I am in love with my girlfriend, however she is not a US citizen and does NOT have a VWP. I have luckily been able to visit her every three months and we talk on the phone everyday, however I just started a new job and am not going to be able to take vacation time as freely.

I would like to pay for her to come visit me in the US, however we are not yet ready to get married. I would first like to see her spend time here, see how well her english improves, if she can get a job, if she's truly happy with me while away from her family, etc. before I REALLY pop the question. She is willing to move here to see if it works and I am able to support her. If things end up not working out (no matter how bad they get), I would see to it that she is taken care of or has arrangements to get home or whatever... (basically, I'm saying I'm a decent guy, I wouldn't leave her stranded in a foreign country after she moved here for me).

We're both willing to go through the hoops necessary to "marry", just for the sake of the paperwork, but I'm wondering what you all think about that... has anyone gone through with their marriage just to get their loved one over here? any thoughts on the risks? general comments?

Thanks

[Jasman0717 9]

You should probably read up on visitor visas. Where is she from, does she have a job or land?

[zyggy 9]

Hey All,

I have a concern that I don't see mentioned too often on here, but I'm hoping several will have an opinion about...

I am in love with my girlfriend, however she is not a US citizen and does NOT have a VWP. I have luckily been able to visit her every three months and we talk on the phone everyday, however I just started a new job and am not going to be able to take vacation time as freely.

I would like to pay for her to come visit me in the US, however we are not yet ready to get married. I would first like to see her spend time here, see how well her english improves, if she can get a job, if she's truly happy with me while away from her family, etc. before I REALLY pop the question. She is willing to move here to see if it works and I am able to support her. If things end up not working out (no matter how bad they get), I would see to it that she is taken care of or has arrangements to get home or whatever... (basically, I'm saying I'm a decent guy, I wouldn't leave her stranded in a foreign country after she moved here for me).

We're both willing to go through the hoops necessary to "marry", just for the sake of the paperwork, but I'm wondering what you all think about that... has anyone gone through with their marriage just to get their loved one over here? any thoughts on the risks? general comments?

Thanks

Your only real option is to get a visitor visa.. However, depending where she is from, it is generally very difficult for a single, young woman to get a visitor visa, especially if there is a USC fiancee involved.

To get the visa, she will need to demonstrate to the satisfaction of a consular official that she has sufficient ties to her home country that would require her to return home at the end of her visit. Having a fiancee in the US often results in an automatic denial of the visa (it is asked for on the visa application form).

[Ladylethal 12]

If she wants to work, she would have to apply for a work visa, or maybe if she wants to improve her english, she should get in touch with an english course and apply for a student program to learn english, they have imersion programs up to 6 months, where she can stay in US, study english and get some work (depending on the program). That way when she applies for the visa, with the program all set it´s a lot easier to get it, and she´ll be all legal, with the advantage of actually studying the language and seeing what´s like to live in US.

[eric1228 0]

I'm aware of the other types of visas, however the K1 seems to be faster and would work more to our benefit which is why I was asking the question to a group of K1 visa applicants...

My questions were more along the lines of what are your thoughts on us claiming we are engaged to get the visa? do you suggest waiting out the 90 days to see if things are working, or would you suggest fake the marriage right away so she can begin applying for AOS and work here? would it work? has anyone here done that? heard stories?

Thanks!

[Jenn! 918]

I'm aware of the other types of visas, however the K1 seems to be faster and would work more to our benefit which is why I was asking the question to a group of K1 visa applicants...

My questions were more along the lines of what are your thoughts on us claiming we are engaged to get the visa? do you suggest waiting out the 90 days to see if things are working, or would you suggest fake the marriage right away so she can begin applying for AOS and work here? would it work? has anyone here done that? heard stories?

Thanks!

I don't think anyone here would ever advocate faking a marriage.

[Jasman0717 9]

I'm aware of the other types of visas, however the K1 seems to be faster and would work more to our benefit which is why I was asking the question to a group of K1 visa applicants...

My questions were more along the lines of what are your thoughts on us claiming we are engaged to get the visa? do you suggest waiting out the 90 days to see if things are working, or would you suggest fake the marriage right away so she can begin applying for AOS and work here? would it work? has anyone here done that? heard stories?

Thanks!

Study the K-1 guide here on VJ

[zyggy 9]

I'm aware of the other types of visas, however the K1 seems to be faster and would work more to our benefit which is why I was asking the question to a group of K1 visa applicants...

My questions were more along the lines of what are your thoughts on us claiming we are engaged to get the visa? do you suggest waiting out the 90 days to see if things are working, or would you suggest fake the marriage right away so she can begin applying for AOS and work here? would it work? has anyone here done that? heard stories?

Thanks!

I don't think anyone here would ever advocate faking a marriage.

The K1 is not a getting to know you better visa... it's a commitment to spend the rest of my life with you visa...

True couples do not care about whether they will "fit in" or not, whether they can get used to the "culture" or not, whether they get along together or not...

True couples will do whatever it takes to make it work, becuase being together is the most important thing in their lives...

If you're unsure, then you need to spend some more time getting to know each other until you are both sure and are willing to take the steps needed to make things work... not just get together and pray that it works..

[Lizzy 0]

She could come here on a Studant visa i would imagine, maybe as suggested above to learn English.

You are not engaged yet so... you would not have to put that on the form.

Melanie

[Jenn! 918]

Although some people DO use a K1 visa as a 90 day "get to know you and see if we actually want to do this", IMO it is actually fraudulent.

In order to get the K1 visa, both parties must submit letters of intent to marry within 90 days of entry. If you submit these letters without actually being sure of your intent, then you are abusing the system.

"Using the system" as you suggest in your topic title contributes to the backlogs that all of us who are actually serious about our intentions must suffer through.

[Saddle Bronc 124]

Don't forget that to get it, there must be evidence of existing relationship AND proof of meeting within the last two years.

(and using "religious reasons" to waive the meeting-in-person requirement is unlikely to fly )

[eric1228 0]

we have met in the past two years, which was clearly stated in my original post. we have been together for three years and have seen each other at least once every three months.

yes, we are serious about each other, thank you for those unwelcoming comments that have suggested we're not. a three year long term relationship is just that... very serious.

for those of you who do love your significant other and wish nothing but to be with them, I would have expected much more compassion from you. I want nothing but to be with my girlfriend. I love her and it breaks my heart to hear her cry on the phone every night because we can not be together. I take marriage very seriously and do not want to rush into it if I don't feel that I am 100% ready, however the US Government gives us very few choices on how we can be together (as stated above by those who suggested other visas... and commented on their difficulties and delays).

I still hope to receive a few comments regarding the questions I posted as many have offered their opinions, but few have offered answers. Thanks in advance to those who are understanding about how difficult being away from your loved one can be.

[Jenn! 918]

we have met in the past two years, which was clearly stated in my original post. we have been together for three years and have seen each other at least once every three months.

yes, we are serious about each other, thank you for those unwelcoming comments that have suggested we're not. a three year long term relationship is just that... very serious.

for those of you who do love your significant other and wish nothing but to be with them, I would have expected much more compassion from you. I want nothing but to be with my girlfriend. I love her and it breaks my heart to hear her cry on the phone every night because we can not be together. I take marriage very seriously and do not want to rush into it if I don't feel that I am 100% ready, however the US Government gives us very few choices on how we can be together (as stated above by those who suggested other visas... and commented on their difficulties and delays).

I still hope to receive a few comments regarding the questions I posted as many have offered their opinions, but few have offered answers. Thanks in advance to those who are understanding about how difficult being away from your loved one can be.

No need to get defensive.

We're telling you how it is. It was you who proposed "faking a marriage".

We ALL here understand your dilemna and how difficult is to be apart from a loved one.

You also say that the U.S. government gives us very few choices. So you seem to know what your options are already. I don't know what solution you expect us to propose for you.

Yes, many of us probably got married before we would have had immigration not been an issue in order to be with our loved ones. That does not mean that we used the system. We all have to make difficult choices and take risks sometimes.

Edited April 11, 2006 by jenn3539

[Welshcookie 17]

Hey All,

I have a concern that I don't see mentioned too often on here, but I'm hoping several will have an opinion about...

I am in love with my girlfriend, however she is not a US citizen and does NOT have a VWP. I have luckily been able to visit her every three months and we talk on the phone everyday, however I just started a new job and am not going to be able to take vacation time as freely.

I would like to pay for her to come visit me in the US, however we are not yet ready to get married. I would first like to see her spend time here, see how well her english improves, if she can get a job, if she's truly happy with me while away from her family, etc. before I REALLY pop the question. She is willing to move here to see if it works and I am able to support her. If things end up not working out (no matter how bad they get), I would see to it that she is taken care of or has arrangements to get home or whatever... (basically, I'm saying I'm a decent guy, I wouldn't leave her stranded in a foreign country after she moved here for me).

We're both willing to go through the hoops necessary to "marry", just for the sake of the paperwork, but I'm wondering what you all think about that... has anyone gone through with their marriage just to get their loved one over here? any thoughts on the risks? general comments?

Thanks

When you are ready to get married you will know it and then like everyone else on here you go thro the process with confidence. I am afraid there is no 'road testing' time available in this process....you say you are serious and want to be together, then you know what you have to do....no one can tell you everything will be wonderful and work out .... as with any kind of marriage, you have to know in your heart that it is the right thing to do. Lots of ppl here have had to take a leap of faith as regards to settling in a new country, dealing with a new language, work etc....it isn't easy but having a supportive spouse is important.

Good luck in all your decisions

[pax 1]

Jenn is right. I do know that couples who aren't married or don't have immediate plans to get married don't have a whole lot of options, especially if the non-USC party has no grounds for going for a student or working visa.

Sriniv and others here have suggested in the past the possibility of going for one of those visas, and the plan is a winner if the visa can be had because some of those visas are dual-intent, meaning your sweetie could fulfill the terms of the visa as well as marry you and adjust status, all in one fell swoop. But we're assuming there that your girlfriend speaks at least some English and could have grounds to get a work or student visa. Let's assume that's not the case, because if it is, you'd be better off swinging by a forum that deals with work- or student-related visas much more thoroughly than VJ does.

So if your sweetie would like to come here and stands little chance of a student or work visa, then you can do a few things. She could apply for a B-2 visa, which may or may not be a hard sell to a consular officer. It'll be easier for her to get it if she can prove intent to return to her home country, but even then, it's not a sure thing. I would start there because it'll be the easiest and cheapest process for you, if she can get that visa. But be prepared for a decent-sized possibility that she won't. Also keep in mind that she can't work on a B-2 and she can only stay for six months.

If that fails, you could pursue getting, say, Canadian visas and living in Canada together for a while. Skilled-worker visas to Canada aren't all that tough to come by; many college grads with sufficient English and/or French language skills qualify for them. I have no idea how easy or hard it would be for your sweetie to get a Canadian tourist visa, but she could give that a shot if that's something you want to pursue.

Finally, you might be looking at heading to her country for a while. A lot of people on VJ have done just that.

I can't advise you strongly enough to not pursue any idea of either faking a wedding or using a K-1 visa for a purpose other than marriage and subsequent settlement. You're setting yourself for major legal troubles, right up through deportation and a lifetime ban, for your sweetie if you go through something like that. Don't do it. Catch your breath, examine your options, and ask yourself how much you're both willing to do to be together.

Good luck.

Edited April 11, 2006 by pax