a few questions for woman coming from mexico and marrying man

[TBoneTX 47,504]

If she lives near or can easily get to the border, see this thread for another possibility:

If you take this route, be sure to add to the linked thread.   

[W199 463]

On 6/20/2025 at 10:37 AM, tcooll77 said:

 

One thing that has caused friction is she wants to work  and someone told me that brought someone from PR that he couldnt work for  a year. She wants to when she comes here and not sit around the house all day, I dont know how that works, I see you can apply for the a work permit along with the K-1.

 

 

Sounds like she wants to work in order to send a large percentage of money back to Mexico to help her family. That is a normal priority and culture so I'm not saying that is bad. But since you said this issue is causing friction, are you OK with her doing that? Or do you expect the majority of the money to be part of your family's expenses? As you know, expenses will dramatically increase .. car, and very high insurance rates for new USA drivers, health and medical, clothes, food, etc... travel, ..   What happens if she loses her job and she can no longer send money back? Do you have an agreement of what you'll do in that case?

 

Since work and money is causing friction, if there is a large disparity of current wealth, then you should  consider doing a prenup to make sure you are on the same page. 

 

[tcooll77 1]

On 6/20/2025 at 4:31 PM, PGA said:

First (something I always recommend to people), offer to move to Mexico and see how that plays out. Other than that, I have some questions: have you ever met her in person? How did you meet? How long have you known her? Do you have any legal issues in your past? Does she? Does she have any prior travel history? Does she have a record of overstays of her visa anywhere (US particularly)? That is all important information to better judge the situation.

I have offered, it wouldn't make sense for either of us however i would move there if i could work remote or spoke better spanish. I am improving everyday.  we met online organically and we have known each other for over a year. none of us have legal issues. and yes she has records of coming here.

[tcooll77 1]

On 6/21/2025 at 4:25 PM, W199 said:

 

Sounds like she wants to work in order to send a large percentage of money back to Mexico to help her family. That is a normal priority and culture so I'm not saying that is bad. But since you said this issue is causing friction, are you OK with her doing that? Or do you expect the majority of the money to be part of your family's expenses? As you know, expenses will dramatically increase .. car, and very high insurance rates for new USA drivers, health and medical, clothes, food, etc... travel, ..   What happens if she loses her job and she can no longer send money back? Do you have an agreement of what you'll do in that case?

 

Since work and money is causing friction, if there is a large disparity of current wealth, then you should  consider doing a prenup to make sure you are on the same page. 

 

We talked about this because that is what it sounded like and that because she has lived in survival mode her entire life i was concerned where the focus would be. at this point its much greater chance that my inquiry is to gain knowledge.  Im not ok with a majority of the money being sent home, and yes i explained it to here that here its not easy. I think she has dreams and i understand however trying to understand each other has been a challenge and I think its god saying hold on ! 

 

thank you

On 6/21/2025 at 3:57 PM, TBoneTX said:

If she lives near or can easily get to the border, see this thread for another possibility:

If you take this route, be sure to add to the linked thread.   

Thank you, I was just in lewisville last week lol

[W199 463]

21 hours ago, tcooll77 said:

  Im not ok with a majority of the money being sent home, and yes i explained it to here that here its not easy. I think she has dreams and i understand however trying to understand each other has been a challenge and I think its god saying hold on ! 

 

I speak from experience, my ex and I agreed upon a generous amount we'd  send monthly, much more than the typical family income in her Country.  But she was the most incredible and amazing charming actress ever.  She had no intentions of abiding by that. She had dreams of making her family rich.  It didn't end well.  I just hope you don't fall into the same trap as I did. Think with your head. Good luck

[tcooll77 1]

yall are amazing, patient and helpful. thank you!

[TBoneTX 47,504]

14 hours ago, tcooll77 said:

yall are amazing, patient and helpful. thank you!

Thank you in return for being receptive to the advice.