Ok, I need someone to console me.....

[Fandango 1,439]

You also need to consider the lifestyle of the Navy wife, in that your potential husband can be deployed for 6 months at a time. Can you deal with that length of separation?

Keep in mind that 60-70% of Navy marriages fail. A sad statistic indeed. Best of luck to you.

Wow, you're a ray of sunshine. Why should she keep those stats in mind?

Because I don't blow sunshine, where it don't shine. I am a realist.

Ookay but what's that gotta do with her? lol

But what was the intended outcome? 'oh william you're so right, lemme knock this whole marriage thing on the head'

[Jas&Pat 0]

I understand, being asian and all, my parents also didn't want me to get married without them there. But sometimes we all have to make compromises. The compromise we made was that I "eloped" over here with just a simple ceremony with me/him + officiant and 2 witnesses. We'll do the whole formal ceremony when we go back to Asia after everything in the U.S is settled (graduated/AOS or AP approved etc). It kinda sucks not having family and friends when I got married but you can always look forward to the ceremony when its all done. Tell your parents they would have more time to plan a more elaborate wedding! *grin*

[William33 110]

You also need to consider the lifestyle of the Navy wife, in that your potential husband can be deployed for 6 months at a time. Can you deal with that length of separation?

Keep in mind that 60-70% of Navy marriages fail. A sad statistic indeed. Best of luck to you.

Wow, you're a ray of sunshine. Why should she keep those stats in mind?

Because I don't blow sunshine, where it don't shine. I am a realist.

Ookay but what's that gotta do with her? lol

But what was the intended outcome? 'oh william you're so right, lemme knock this whole marriage thing on the head'

Lisa, I am trying to be helpful. In fact my wife is in a PM exchange with her now, trying to offer Indonesia custom related advice and ideas. End game, a positive solution to her dilemma.

[Detty2809 0]

I understand, being asian and all, my parents also didn't want me to get married without them there. But sometimes we all have to make compromises. The compromise we made was that I "eloped" over here with just a simple ceremony with me/him + officiant and 2 witnesses. We'll do the whole formal ceremony when we go back to Asia after everything in the U.S is settled (graduated/AOS or AP approved etc). It kinda sucks not having family and friends when I got married but you can always look forward to the ceremony when its all done. Tell your parents they would have more time to plan a more elaborate wedding! *grin*

Hi I thought I wouldn't get any responds from being such a crybaby about this. But I got lots from all of you. I thank you.

I might as well try to talk to my parents...and brace for some yelling and all that. But hopefully they will understand...

Jas&Pat meant that the compromise was: it's just going to be a small wedding in the states and that they will wait until they're thru with everything in the states to have a formal wedding in singapore? I was thinking about this one too...but dunno if my parents would compromise knowing that the AOS would take months.

Edited December 5, 2006 by Detty2809

[mrc 0]

Charles, William is right. Security clearances are issued by DCID. Generally, there are no countries that are restricted for travel but you must report your travel to your security office and it must be cleared through the SSO...briefings, paperwork, ####### probes, etc.

[JaJo 1]

Dunno if he would be able to come down to Singapore before I go to the states. Hmm....or should I try getting an Advanced Parole after getting married in the states then come down to Singapore with him?

Detty,

I'm afraid you don't have many options. If you go through a K1, you have to go to the US and get married there within 90 days of your arrival. You cannot get married somewhere else and then go to the US...

I think an AP is your best bet.

[Alanlvsjudy 0]

You also need to consider the lifestyle of the Navy wife, in that your potential husband can be deployed for 6 months at a time. Can you deal with that length of separation?

Keep in mind that 60-70% of Navy marriages fail. A sad statistic indeed. Best of luck to you.

Wow, you're a ray of sunshine. Why should she keep those stats in mind?

Because I don't blow sunshine, where it don't shine. I am a realist.

William...I'm busting a gut here...the thread subject says "I need someone to console me"

do me a favor and never console me...

[Detty2809 0]

JaJo.

Was thinking about an AP but, after talking to William33's wifey and reading what Jas&Pat wrote, I guess I will try to compromise with my parents. Gonna tell them that I will come back with my man to my country (if he could get a permission to) for the whole formal wedding ceremony AFTER I get my status adjusted... which is going to take about 3-4 months, I believe? And if he can't travel to Indonesia, we'll try to hold a ceremony in the closest country to Indonesia...prolly Singapore...

[Detty2809 0]

....any better idea? :|

[Fandango 1,439]

Could your parents not get a traveler's visa to the US? Once you get approved on a K1, don't you have 6 mos to use it? If your parents start their own petition now, perhaps the times can line up with all of you.

I'm really unfamiliar with Indonesia and don't particularly know whether or not you could get a visitor's visa, but it's worth looking into!

[Detty2809 0]

LisaD

I guess we could try but, it's been hard for Indonesians to get a visitor visa to the states. I myself got refused once when I wanted to visit my fiance. My parents are kinda pessimistic about getting the visa. Plus, my fiance felt uncomfy to get my parents all the way to the states while all that we're going to do is just a marriage in a court house cuz my fiance does not know when he will be deployed. Could be the day after the marriage.... I'm ready and kinda used to that kind of thing, but my parents?

There was a time when I was out on a date with my fiance when we were in Japan and he got a call that he had to go back to the ship cuz they decided that they were deploying the next day. Kinda annoying.. hehe.....

Edited December 5, 2006 by Detty2809

[Ban Hammer 12,909]

Charles, William is right. Security clearances are issued by DCID. Generally, there are no countries that are restricted for travel but you must report your travel to your security office and it must be cleared through the SSO...briefings, paperwork, ####### probes, etc.

communist controlled countries are off limits for non official travel. check on it

[rclouse 0]

I guess we could try but, it's been hard for Indonesians to get a visitor visa to the states. I myself got refused once when I wanted to visit my fiance. My parents are kinda pessimistic about getting the visa.

Could you have a marriage ceremony in Indonesia for your parents, then when you come to the US have the legal marriage done here?

[Detty2809 0]

I guess we could try but, it's been hard for Indonesians to get a visitor visa to the states. I myself got refused once when I wanted to visit my fiance. My parents are kinda pessimistic about getting the visa.

Could you have a marriage ceremony in Indonesia for your parents, then when you come to the US have the legal marriage done here?

We just have to ask again whether my fiance can travel to my country or not. Last time we asked about it, his BOSS said he could not (US Military personnel). We will ask again soon.Also it's just hard for him to come over now cuz they are preparing for deployment in January. I thought we should wait until he gets his shore duty in July, that's when he gets a more human schedule. Unlike now, when he doesnt even know the exact date of his deployments. Hence, trying to talk to my parents to let me go to the states first to be with him until the adjustment of status, and THEN come back to Indonesia for the wedding ceremony..if he could travel to Indonesia, that is..... One step at a time I guess.

[RosaMystica7 0]

Charles, William is right. Security clearances are issued by DCID. Generally, there are no countries that are restricted for travel but you must report your travel to your security office and it must be cleared through the SSO...briefings, paperwork, ####### probes, etc.

....