Desperate

[Desperategirl9791 0]

Hi everyone, i just want to share to you what ive been going thru ever since 2009... I met this American guy from utah in netlog.com we both need each other and so we fell in love. It was internet love, he visited me on Dec 09 and married me thru a Mayor. I was 30 and he was 19, age is just a number for me and i dont even care to what ppl say as long as were happy im good. He left after 4 days of being married it was good even just married and being with him for a few days. After he left, we were just emailing and all and sometimes talk on skype but i found out april 2010 he went to japan to meet someone and had sex with her on a hotel. It hurt me so much that i cannot take it. I was crying so much, day and night and cant even trust him. I believe if there is no trust, love fades easily and thats what is happening. Many things happened, he visited me june 2010 to catch up. but thats just it.. i tried everything so i can forget every hurt that he has given for i am a believer of marriage. But when he came to the US again, seems like im not wife to him, he disrespects me and even calls me name. I have give up. I know, if ur reading this u can say that i easily give up, i know i am.. im just tired of it and i feel like it changes me into something bad.. and i wanna stop it... I was being strong, i dont even care anymore bout my marriage ive tried everything but seems like it isnt enough. Jan 17 2011, my husband filed for IR1 visa and i was hoping we can get thru on this and save our marriage by being together but while this visa is on going seems like his not changing for the better, his changing into the worse and i cant take it even more, the more i try the more i hurt.. i feel so horrible.. i was also being insulted by one girl that shes having an affair with in the internet and even told me that she saw some naked pics of me that i gave to my husband and they were so disgusted. I feel so terrible, he even shared our private pics to her.. i was so crushed and cant trust him anymore i wanna forget him and move on. i messaged him on yahoo that it isnt working between us and to stop the visa and he did. it was a mistake, both our mistake. All i wish ever since i was a child is to have a family and the first man that i will marry will be the last, till our last breath but i was wrong.. i thought i can fight for it but seems like the terrible things that happened to me that he did is the reason why i dont want wanna be with him anymore...I moved on wit my life for months after telling him that and he didnt talk to me too. Oct 2011 i met this american guy thru a friend his the same field (work) like me. I was just being nice and needs company like he do too and expect the unexpected and we fell in love like that. were both on the same birthdays and seems like soulmate and it is. I told him everything about my life and about this guy i married mistakenly and he accepted me, everything about and helped me moved on. And he changed me for the better, he helped bring my confidence back, the respect to myself and everything which my husband broke. it brought back becoz of him. Now im In love and wanna move on with my life, we were looking for lawyers here in the phils but we cant afford it its too expensive. I cant afford 300,000 pesos to annul my husband coz i lost my job too. So what he suggested is to talk to my husband and ask if he could file divorce in utah where he came from, which i did. I talked to my husband again even i feel terrible and disrespected whenever i talk to him. I asked if he could file it but he wasnt cooperating early 2012. Twas this march that i found out his been seeing a girl in iloilo,Phils and he came to the phils to visit her. I called his mom as an alternate, and told her about what i wanted, to ask if his son could divorce me and so we both could move on with our life. I kept hoping and hoping and praying calling from Phils to Utah april, may, june, Jul, aug and now sep and all i hear is court in utah has mistakenly gave him the wrong instructions that he needs to file again, that there is already a case number for the divorce his mom said that shes gonna email it to me, emailed her so many times but shes not even replying, i called her phone again and told me she hasnt get ahold with his son so i need to call again. Ive been doing that for this past months but all i hear is nothing. I think they are just trying to make me suffer. Im loosing patience, losing hope of being with the man i love. thinking ill just give up love and let go of it and just forget bout my happiness coz i think its what my husband is doing. Not to make me happy. I just dont know what to do right now, im so blank, i cant think what to do with my future and to be with the person i love. My life is messed up and i dont know what to do with it.. Im so sad and just wanna cry...;(

[InHisTime 110]

Hello Sis! I'm sorry to know your situation. How I wish I could give you the best legal advice. Hugs! Seems this guy (your husband) is so selfish.

For now, I just wanna say, be strong! take time, don't lose hope and faith...and cry out to God for His mercy. I'm sure God will direct you to the best effort that you can do in getting divorce or maybe annulment. God knows the desires of your heart so never give up --

I'm sure there would be other VJ friends could help you with good legal advice. Hang in there!

[Lalo & Susana 50]

Well first I don't think you gave up on ur marriage to soon I think if he is disrespecting u and cheating on u it will only get worse. And regarding the divorce u might not want to hear it but u r on ur own. That happened with my fiancé. Hi ex in no way wanted to get divorced not Bc she loved him but Bc she didn't want to spend money Bc "he gave up one them". Well of course he did she cheated on him. I think ur ex is doing this to be vengeful and so is his mother stop calling them. Focus on u and borrow money from a family member or try getting money some other way. It's going to be very hard but if ur new boyfriend truly loves you he will wait. He might grow impatient God knows I did. But in the end if he really loves u he will wait.

Good luck I wish u the best.

Edited September 13, 2012 by Lalo & Susana

[C-ma'am 684]

**Post moved from K1 Progress Reports to Off Topic; as there are no questions about any immigration process.