What's the story with American Women?

[yogib37 3]

Yuma

Do you have any winabegos? *sp*

and not the RV's

[one...two...tree 2,762]

Do you have any winabegos? *sp*

and not the RV's

Winnebago

[Mags 112]

Assuming Sian is approved this Wednesday.

*coughs*

Tuesday my dear, Tuesday. Asuming Sian is approved on TUESDAY.

(yes this is her btw, got my wet flounder ready to slap him with...)

Edited October 1, 2006 by mags

[ceriserose 1]

ceriserose is a bully?

Yeah, apparently I've kept it well hidden for the almost 2 years I've been here. I'm amazingly talented at deception...

Assuming Sian is approved this Wednesday.

*coughs*

Tuesday my dear, Tuesday. Asuming Sian is approved on TUESDAY.

(yes this is her btw, got my wet flounder ready to slap him with...)

Best of luck on your interview! And on coming here to a finished house. (Or semi-finished house!)

[Fandango 1,439]

Ugh, I hate that song so much.

American woman, stay away from me

American woman, mama let me be

why you hate that song so much? is it cause it speaks the truth about a lot of american women?

I'm guessing someone couldn't get laid by American women.

I gotten laid by many american women. I just choice not to spend my life with them. I have friends but nothing more. Also if they think GWB is a great pres. like you do, then they are out cause they are not that bright.

This response is really for ALL the men who supposedly turn their noses up at American women:

Anyone who talks about American Women as if we are one homogenized breed of poodle is the one who's 'not too bright' ironically enough, we women in America are comprised from all over the globe, so how we can all be similar is ridiculous, and literally impossible. This notion actually goes to prove that whoever says it really has NO intelligence when it comes to the other gender, and no wonder they have to 'look elsewhere'

You are free to have a preference towards any nationality you want....whether you're looking for a foreign woman because it's your heritage, or because you love the traditions, or find the whole process very exotic, or even if you're looking to retain an element of control that you wouldn't have over someone who's lived here...that's FINE...but to say that 'these women are this these women are that' is not only shortsighted, it's ignorant and might I add socially retarded.

I ppoint you all to those crash and burn posts where the foreign woman came here and 'became Americanized' because she started making her own choices...LOL THE NERVE, EH?

[ceriserose 1]

Ugh, I hate that song so much.

American woman, stay away from me

American woman, mama let me be

why you hate that song so much? is it cause it speaks the truth about a lot of american women?

I'm guessing someone couldn't get laid by American women.

I gotten laid by many american women. I just choice not to spend my life with them. I have friends but nothing more. Also if they think GWB is a great pres. like you do, then they are out cause they are not that bright.

This response is really for ALL the men who supposedly turn their noses up at American women:

Anyone who talks about American Women as if we are one homogenized breed of poodle is the one who's 'not too bright' ironically enough, we women in America are comprised from all over the globe, so how we can all be similar is ridiculous, and literally impossible. This notion actually goes to prove that whoever says it really has NO intelligence when it comes to the other gender, and no wonder they have to 'look elsewhere'

You are free to have a preference towards any nationality you want....whether you're looking for a foreign woman because it's your heritage, or because you love the traditions, or find the whole process very exotic, or even if you're looking to retain an element of control that you wouldn't have over someone who's lived here...that's FINE...but to say that 'these women are this these women are that' is not only shortsighted, it's ignorant and might I add socially retarded.

I ppoint you all to those crash and burn posts where the foreign woman came here and 'became Americanized' because she started making her own choices...LOL THE NERVE, EH?

[PurrSuede 0]

I ppoint you all to those crash and burn posts where the foreign woman came here and 'became Americanized' because she started making her own choices...LOL THE NERVE, EH?

As I said before, it takes TWO people to choose to keep a marriage vibrant and alive, whereas it only takes ONE to choose to let it crash and burn...

She can make whatever choices she wants, it's her life, and now I have mine, completely apart from her, which was my choice to make after watching her make "her own choice" that her "new life in America" was more important to her than the married relationship, ostensibly with the man she claimed she "loved" and wanted to be with forever. Amazing how she made a different choice once she came to America. As I said, her choice to make...

As I told the USCIS "she claimed she loved me, wanted husband, home, family and children" and then "changed her mind" (aka made a different "choice") once she arrived in America. The USCIS officer felt that these kinds of "choices" could be possibly construed as FRAUDULENT immigration, I might add.

It will also be their "choice" to choose to investigate her activities when she files for lifting of conditions along with a waiver and the divorce decree.

You might just want to keep that in mind before you start pointing to "all of those" posts, kindly, and finding them so wonderfully "funny".

ha ha ha, indeed...

-- Dan

[Fandango 1,439]

I ppoint you all to those crash and burn posts where the foreign woman came here and 'became Americanized' because she started making her own choices...LOL THE NERVE, EH?

As I said before, it takes TWO people to choose to keep a marriage vibrant and alive, whereas it only takes ONE to choose to let it crash and burn...

She can make whatever choices she wants, it's her life, and now I have mine, completely apart from her, which was my choice to make after watching her make "her own choice" that her "new life in America" was more important to her than the married relationship, ostensibly with the man she claimed she "loved" and wanted to be with forever. Amazing how she made a different choice once she came to America. As I said, her choice to make...

As I told the USCIS "she claimed she loved me, wanted husband, home, family and children" and then "changed her mind" (aka made a different "choice") once she arrived in America. The USCIS officer felt that these kinds of "choices" could be possibly construed as FRAUDULENT immigration, I might add.

It will also be their "choice" to choose to investigate her activities when she files for lifting of conditions along with a waiver and the divorce decree.

You might just want to keep that in mind before you start pointing to "all of those" posts, kindly, and finding them so wonderfully "funny".

ha ha ha, indeed...

-- Dan

I wasn't specifically referring to YOURS Dan, as there are many who find themselves in the same exact situation.

But since you brought it up: I suggest you reread your thread....before you have the same unrealistic expectations and make the same mistakes again. No, I don't condone lying or sneaking around....and fyi, that's not an 'American trait'....but getting a job and making friends, and VALUING an opinion of a friend from her homeland is NOT a bad thing. Seems like you just expected her to sit at home and churn out babies...

Without completely derailing this thread, I'll tell you more about it in your own if I ever get the time to write summat out...but helping a woman find her own wings to fly is not something that's against a partnership....imo, it's what any supportive spouse does. When I moved to the UK, I was shocked at how different it was...silly me, I guess, but I felt like I stuck out like SUCH a sore thumb. I moved to an area where I was literally THE ONLY AMERICAN there...and anytime I said anything, everyone made a big hoo ha. So I would tell D 'hey ask this...ask that' until one day he sat me down and said 'this is your home too, Lisa...you cannot be afraid to get stuck in'

So I did...and boy was I glad. I made my own friends, went out on my own, learned the public transport system & became independant. And it was all thanks to my man who didn't want me to be this quivering mass of codependence. he didn't keep in a cage with my wings clipped...he helped me learn to fly

*cue Bette Middler*

[Fandango 1,439]

Let me also add: acclimating to the UK was really difficult...and it's the easiest county to move to in regards to being the most similar, no language barrier, etc. I MARVEL at these men and women who move here from other countries which aren't so similar...there is so much to get used to! Naturally, there will be a huge adjustment period...and I say as long as the lines of communication stay open, it should be an 'anything goes' type situation (not in THAT way) to help the spouse feel more comfortable.

So you both said you wanted babies, but then she wants to try her hand at a job for a little bit....is that so damn wrong? Let her find her own way!

[PurrSuede 0]

So you both said you wanted babies, but then she wants to try her hand at a job for a little bit....is that so damn wrong? Let her find her own way!

No it's not so "damn wrong", but it's just AMAZING the empathy for those who's relationships have "crashed and burned" that you're exhibiting with your posting and comments, LisaD.

I don't find any relationship that terminates sadly in a divorce after someone's hopes for a successful loving relationship had been incredibly high to be something worth laughing about.

But that's just me. Your mileage, obviously, can and will vary greatly.

-- Dan

But since you brought it up: I suggest you reread your thread....before you have the same unrealistic expectations and make the same mistakes again. No, I don't condone lying or sneaking around....and fyi, that's not an 'American trait'....but getting a job and making friends, and VALUING an opinion of a friend from her homeland is NOT a bad thing. Seems like you just expected her to sit at home and churn out babies...

I have deliberately left out a LOT of the personal aspects that occurred between us as it is no one else's business and deeply personal.

And how it "seems" to you may be a reflection ~perhaps~ of your American perspective on things, which goes -right- along with this threat... But I don't plan on explaining all the "juicy bits" to you however it might have SEEMED...

but helping a woman find her own wings to fly is not something that's against a partnership....imo, it's what any supportive spouse does.

Certainly, if the needs of the marriage relationship are being fulfilled and the "finding of one's own's wings" does NOT become paramount to the support of a loving married relationship, Lisa.

So I did...and boy was I glad. I made my own friends, went out on my own, learned the public transport system & became independant. And it was all thanks to my man who didn't want me to be this quivering mass of codependence. he didn't keep in a cage with my wings clipped...he helped me learn to fly

And that's absolutely wonderful. But I'm willing to bet that you continued to participate in the marriage and in the intimate and personal aspects of your married life together ~while~ you were learning to fly. I never said I didn't do those things for her. You assumed that.

Assume all you like, the amount of empathy you've exhibited for those (both partners) who've been badly hurt in the "crashing and burning" is just overwhelming.

But again, that's just me...

-- Dan

[Fandango 1,439]

So you both said you wanted babies, but then she wants to try her hand at a job for a little bit....is that so damn wrong? Let her find her own way!

No it's not so "damn wrong", but it's just AMAZING the empathy for those who's relationships have "crashed and burned" that you're exhibiting with your posting and comments, LisaD.

I don't find any relationship that terminates sadly in a divorce after someone's hopes for a successful loving relationship had been incredibly high to be something worth laughing about.

But that's just me. Your mileage, obviously, can and will vary greatly.

-- Dan

You want sympathy from me when you say your wife became 'Americanized' cos she started lying? You associate all sorts of qualities...some really bad, some that anyone over the age of 18 should have...as being an 'Americanized woman' and you expect sympathy after you've alienated me with your ignorance? Know your audience man!

But since you brought it up: I suggest you reread your thread....before you have the same unrealistic expectations and make the same mistakes again. No, I don't condone lying or sneaking around....and fyi, that's not an 'American trait'....but getting a job and making friends, and VALUING an opinion of a friend from her homeland is NOT a bad thing. Seems like you just expected her to sit at home and churn out babies...

I have deliberately left out a LOT of the personal aspects that occurred between us as it is no one else's business and deeply personal.

And how it "seems" to you may be a reflection ~perhaps~ of your American perspective on things, which goes -right- along with this threat... But I don't plan on explaining all the "juicy bits" to you however it might have SEEMED...

Hi, this is a public messageboard...have you two met???? Don't down anyone for commenting on your situation if you're the one who put it out there welcoming speculation! You didn't pm a few close friends...you put your marital problems on a messageboard and now wanna judge me cos I only know half a story? Allrighty then!!! You didn't say 'oh things didn't work out and I'm not going to disclose it here'...noooooo....YOU put it out there & said 'oh she became Americanized....she got a job, made a friend, and was asking her friend things instead of me!' You welcome comments like 'oh that really sucks' but then wanna talk with lil cutesy quoted words like 'seemed' as if I somehow have eavesdropped on a pvt conversation when I'm only going on what you've written.

If she did awful things...I am really sorry...BUT...whatever she did was on her, not because she 'became Americanized'....if she lied/cheated/etc...that was HER choice, not that America was 'rubbing off on her'.

I'm not sat here defending your ex: but if being 'Americanized' means being able to make choices and act like a grown woman, well then if that's not what you want...I think that says summat about YOU rather than us heathenous American women

but helping a woman find her own wings to fly is not something that's against a partnership....imo, it's what any supportive spouse does.

Certainly, if the needs of the marriage relationship are being fulfilled and the "finding of one's own's wings" does NOT become paramount to the support of a loving married relationship, Lisa.

Wife first, person second....hokay

So I did...and boy was I glad. I made my own friends, went out on my own, learned the public transport system & became independant. And it was all thanks to my man who didn't want me to be this quivering mass of codependence. he didn't keep in a cage with my wings clipped...he helped me learn to fly

And that's absolutely wonderful. But I'm willing to bet that you continued to participate in the marriage and in the intimate and personal aspects of your married life together ~while~ you were learning to fly. I never said I didn't do those things for her. You assumed that.

I'm only going on what YOU have put out there, Dan.

Yes I did continue to participate in the relationship...but that's because my D saw me as a person, not just a half to a whole.

Assume all you like, the amount of empathy you've exhibited for those (both partners) who've been badly hurt in the "crashing and burning" is just overwhelming.

But again, that's just me...

-- Dan

Again, you invite speculation when you put your problems...whether it's a full or half story on the internet. I would never do that. But then again, that's just ME

Edited October 1, 2006 by LisaD

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

hmmmmmmm

[PlatyPius 5]

Assuming Sian is approved this Wednesday.

*coughs*

Tuesday my dear, Tuesday. Assuming Sian is approved on TUESDAY.

(yes this is her btw, got my wet flounder ready to slap him with...)

Oopsie!

Don't know why I kept thinking Wednesday. I blame it on a lack of sleep and panic involving the state of the house.

*kiss*

Can you see why I love her so much?

Lakota

You realize, of course, that these people aren't really Americans. They are inhabitants of North America, but they are not Americans. They are Lakota, Sioux, Cherokee, Blackfoot, etc. They pre-date the existence of "The United States of America" and to call them Americans is, in the opinion of some, an insult.

Hi, this is a public messageboard...have you two met???? Don't down anyone for commenting on your situation if you're the one who put it out there welcoming speculation! You didn't pm a few close friends...you put your marital problems on a messageboard and now wanna judge me cos I only know half a story? Allrighty then!!! You didn't say 'oh things didn't work out and I'm not going to disclose it here'...noooooo....YOU put it out there & said 'oh she became Americanized....she got a job, made a friend, and was asking her friend things instead of me!' You welcome comments like 'oh that really sucks' but then wanna talk with lil cutesy quoted words like 'seemed' as if I somehow have eavesdropped on a pvt conversation when I'm only going on what you've written.

If she did awful things...I am really sorry...BUT...whatever she did was on her, not because she 'became Americanized'....if she lied/cheated/etc...that was HER choice, not that America was 'rubbing off on her'.

I'm not sat here defending your ex: but if being 'Americanized' means being able to make choices and act like a grown woman, well then if that's not what you want...I think that says summat about YOU rather than us heathenous American women

Gods Lisa, you are SUCH an American Woman! Please don't infect Sian with your American-ness.

[PurrSuede 0]

You want sympathy from me when you say your wife became 'Americanized' cos she started lying? You associate all sorts of qualities...some really bad, some that anyone over the age of 18 should have...as being an 'Americanized woman' and you expect sympathy after you've alienated me with your ignorance? Know your audience man!

Sympathy? from you? Au contraire... you've already demonstrated your lack of empathy regardless of the situation from your original posting "cheering" on those who's relationships have "crashed and burned".

I have no clue why you would think I'd then turn around and seek sympathy from you, when you've demonstrated a complete lack thereof for ~anyone~ in a similar situation...

Hi, this is a public messageboard...have you two met???? Don't down anyone for commenting on your situation if you're the one who put it out there welcoming speculation!

You didn't pm a few close friends...you put your marital problems on a messageboard and now wanna judge me cos I only know half a story?

Wrong! I'm down on you for putting this out there:

"I ppoint you all to those crash and burn posts where the foreign woman came here and 'became Americanized' because she started making her own choices...LOL THE NERVE, EH? "

You seem to think it's something worth laughing at, regardless of the pain BOTH of the partners in the relationship must have suffered. That's what I'm down on you about.

I'm judging you for your original callous remark as though a marriage is a bloody football game... instead of having empathy for someone who's relationship FAILED, and I don't mean ~me~...

Allrighty then!!! You didn't say 'oh things didn't work out and I'm not going to disclose it here'...noooooo....YOU put it out there & said 'oh she became Americanized....she got a job, made a friend, and was asking her friend things instead of me!'

Nowhere did I say ~that~ was the reason the marriage ended, now did I? And I don't plan on posting my divorce decree, if that's alright with you...

If she did awful things...I am really sorry...

Thank you, I guess you can exhibit some degree of empathy after all...

BUT...whatever she did was on her, not because she 'became Americanized'....if she lied/cheated/etc...that was HER choice, not that America was 'rubbing off on her'.

Which is why it's very possible she was "lieing, cheating, acting in a fraudulent manner" PRIOR to entering the marriage, aka in seeking the immigrant visa through marriage. Because following your train of thought, she would have had the same characteristics prior to entering America... which could be why the USCIS is finding her actions worthy of investigation, perhaps...

I'm not sat here defending your ex: but if being 'Americanized' means being able to make choices and act like a grown woman, well then if that's not what you want...

Which is part of my issue, Lisa. I'm not saying that's what "being Americanized" means... but the fact is as she immersed and become comfortable in American culture, the choices she made were to promote her own selfish, self-absorbed and self-centered interests and NOT to the benefit of the marriage. Notice, I didn't say to my benefit, but to the benefit of the MARRIED relationship itself.

I would have RELISHED she would have acted like a grown woman, as an equal partner in a marriage, instead of a spoiled kid in a candy-store who wanted to do whatever SHE wanted to do regardless of the impact on the marriage. A grown woman (assuming she WANTS to be married) acts like a team-mate and an equal PARTNER in a loving relationship.

Wife first, person second....hokay

Oh fer gawd's sake, if she wanted to ACT like "single person" upon arriving in America then why spend a year telling someone how much she wanted "married relationship,"...

hello... I never said "person second", but there are obviously differences between acting like you are in a married relationship and just dating whomever you please, after arriving in a foreign country ON A VISA TO GET MARRIED. The K-1 is NOT about saying "how about if I come to America and just act like a single woman, but just live with you?".

So I did...and boy was I glad. I made my own friends, went out on my own, learned the public transport system & became independant. And it was all thanks to my man who didn't want me to be this quivering mass of codependence. he didn't keep in a cage with my wings clipped...he helped me learn to fly

Just even assuming that for some reason I would WANT a "quivering mass of codependence" speaks volumes about your point of view, Lisa. Nowhere, did I ever indicate that is what I wanted...

Yes I did continue to participate in the relationship...but that's because my D saw me as a person, not just a half to a whole.

Ahhhhh, and somehow you see something wrong with BEING a "half to a whole"??? I never said JUST a half to a whole, nor does it mean that being HALF of a whole (relationship, marriage, etc.) is somehow denigrating to being seen as a complete person.

Again, you invite speculation when you put your problems...whether it's a full or half story on the internet. I would never do that. But then again, that's just ME

Nope, in your case "ME" is the one who found it so laughingly funny about those people who's relationships "crashed and burned" regardless of the personal pain and suffering, much less the time, energy and money these people wasted in what they HOPED would be a "happy relationship".

I find it nothing to "laugh" (aka LOL) or "whistle" over, but as you said... "that's just YOU".

-- Dan

Edited October 2, 2006 by PurrSuede

[Fandango 1,439]

Wrong! I'm down on you for putting this out there:

"I ppoint you all to those crash and burn posts where the foreign woman came here and 'became Americanized' because she started making her own choices...LOL THE NERVE, EH? "

...I still agree with that...I DIDN'T name names...again, I wasn't referring to you there, but hey...if you took offense to it, perhaps you should ask yourself why.

oh, and it's 'downing me' ...you are 'downing me' for my comment....most certainly not 'down on me'