Life after move...

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

My wife and stepdaughter live at Forever 21!

A few weeks ago I dropped them off at the mall and they were in that store for over 6 hours.

As for "others" posting in the RUB forums ... you can. But do so at your own peril!

Alla LOVES shopping here and in Montreal. There is absolutely NO lack of attractive clothing, shoes, etc.

The shopping is definitely one of the big PLUSES and not just for clothes. Her favorite stores are also "Bed, Bath & Beyond", "Lowes" (where she goes "homeowning"), "Micheals", "IKEA", etc. and all the furniture and electronic stores.

We are in the process of remodeling our home and she loves to choose all the things. she really gets into it and takes her time. We are about ready to start the 2nd bathroom and she took almost a year to pick out all the tile, fixtures, vanity, etc. She is the type that tries on 20 dresses and buys 1. She can spend hours and hours in a Lowe's store.

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

People from this culture have no patience for BULLSH*T. There IS NO bullsh*t. If you are not familiar with it, you will take it as rude, but that is YOUR problem. I assure you it is not theirs.

If you have a Ukrainian friend, and I am fortunate enough to have several, they would hack off their right arm for you with a dull pocket knife. The word "friend" in Russian is a very powerful word. There is no phoney "Have a nice day!" nonsense. They also do not fall in holes in the sidewalk and if they do they do not sue anyone for it because they were stupid enough to fall in a hole. They would be embarrassed.

One of the most refreshing and liberating things I experienced living in Ukraine was the absolute lack of BULLSH*T.

None of us wise enough to choose a Russian/Ukrainian/Belarussian for a spouse need ever worry if they are secretly angry with us.

I gave Kira a "pep talk" before and right after she got here...like before she met the family. That was for a few reasons...one my family is super dysfunctional, and secondly I didn't want Kira to start WW3 with her "honesty and bluntness" when she met my family for the first time. She never pulls a punch so to say, but sometimes she can make my jaw drop when she tells it like it is. It doesn't get to me so much anymore...I just play it off.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Inna, something nobody seems to mention but is very important is the huge regional diversity of the US! The climate and the geography here varies much more than in Ukraine, from near tropical weather in Florida to Siberia like cold in Alaska, from coastal living to the plains of the midwest, the mountains in both eastern and western USA, the hot/dry deserts to the humidity of the southeast. Here you are free to own the land itself. People usually live in single-family homes with lawns and gardens. In many areas you rarely see fences, let alone walls, around anybody's property. The water is usually very clean and safe. We swim in our lakes and rivers without fear of catching disease or being exposed to poisons. Here, people complain about government offices if they have to wait even a few minutes to get something done. You never, ever need to bribe someone to get reasonable service. The lifestyle is different but you are free to make it whatever you want. If you want high quality clothes you can easily find them. If you want great food it is easy to find. If you ever become handicapped you will not be shunned from participating in anything you could be capable of. The list goes on and on. Where here will you live? If you tell us that you can get much more specific comments! I think you will like it! Oh, one more thing, the roads and highways are so much easier and safer to drive on than in Kiev!!

Another big plus! "Clean nature". Clean water, clean walking paths (I know you love to walk, all Ukrainians do) clean parks, good roads. We go for hikes in the mountains and Alla is constantly taking photos. We have lots of her framed photos around the house. These are either interesting buildings in Ukraine and Russia or nature in Vermont, also a few buildings now from Montreal.

Alla loves to ride horses, shoot skeet, swim, ice skate (great skating parks in Montreal!), ski (lots of skiing here) walk in the city or on nature trails, fly airplanes, go to theatre performances and concerts. We have outdoor concerts almost every evening here around here in the parks (in the summer) and we go to them a couple evenings per week. She gets to do all these things here. Many of those cost very little money, so you do not have to be "rich" to enjoy them. We also walk over to a local tavern sometimes and play pool (billiards), walk to the drive in theatre. Our neighbors own it and let us in free. She calls it "the movie park" On summer evenings we take a blanket, walk over and watch a movie sitting on the ground. We bring some snacks and Alla brings a bottle of wine. Our youngest son works at the snack bar there in the summer.

Really it is not a bad place.

As James says, life is defitiely what you make it and the list of activities will vary by location.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

I gave Kira a "pep talk" before and right after she got here...like before she met the family. That was for a few reasons...one my family is super dysfunctional, and secondly I didn't want Kira to start WW3 with her "honesty and bluntness" when she met my family for the first time. She never pulls a punch so to say, but sometimes she can make my jaw drop when she tells it like it is. It doesn't get to me so much anymore...I just play it off.

My mom met Alla the week she arrived. All went well, they got along well (they had spoken on the phone many times) and my Mom mostly understood what she was saying, though there were some obvious gaps. So when she left for the evening she hugged Alla and said "Good luck, I love you!" Typical American MIL stuff. Alla said "You love me? But you just met me. How can you love me already?" My Mom looked at me with the "Did I say something bad?" look. Anyway I explained it to her later. They get along fine, really. MY MIL has NEVER said "I love you" to me. But we get along great and it is clear she asks about me and the boys more than Alla, Alla does not let that go un-noticed either. "She loves YOU more than she loves me!"

My sister, on the other hand alomost got into WW3 with her. Someone should NUKE my sister anyway.

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

My mom met Alla the week she arrived. All went well, they got along well (they had spoken on the phone many times) and my Mom mostly understood what she was saying, though there were some obvious gaps. So when she left for the evening she hugged Alla and said "Good luck, I love you!" Typical American MIL stuff. Alla said "You love me? But you just met me. How can you love me already?" My Mom looked at me with the "Did I say something bad?" look. Anyway I explained it to her later. They get along fine, really. MY MIL has NEVER said "I love you" to me. But we get along great and it is clear she asks about me and the boys more than Alla, Alla does not let that go un-noticed either. "She loves YOU more than she loves me!"

My sister, on the other hand alomost got into WW3 with her. Someone should NUKE my sister anyway.

My mom and dad love Kira to death...but my sister...lol....it's bad. My sister was always a spoiled #### to begin with and she thinks her sh*t doesn't stink. She even went as far as to try and move our wedding picture at my folks house to the utility room. So when we have family dinners..xmas, etc... Kira goes out of her way to dress "sexy"...this kills my sister every time. That and my brother in law got caught staring at Kira more than once by my sister and that didn't help matters. I told my brother in law if he ever wised up and dumped my sister that I would take him to Belarus and fix him up with Kira's sister. So what does he do ? On the way back home he rats me to my sister and tells her what I said...he's like so p*ssy whipped.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

My mom and dad love Kira to death...but my sister...lol....it's bad. My sister was always a spoiled #### to begin with and she thinks her sh*t doesn't stink. She even went as far as to try and move our wedding picture at my folks house to the utility room. So when we have family dinners..xmas, etc... Kira goes out of her way to dress "sexy"...this kills my sister every time. That and my brother in law got caught staring at Kira more than once by my sister and that didn't help matters. I told my brother in law if he ever wised up and dumped my sister that I would take him to Belarus and fix him up with Kira's sister. So what does he do ? On the way back home he rats me to my sister and tells her what I said...he's like so p*ssy whipped.

My youngest sister (Alla's age)was always the "glamorous" one. But in the looks department Alla just kinda stiff arms her on her @ss and runs her right over. Basically my sister looked in the mirror, asked "who is the fairest in the land?" and the answer was not HER. So Alla was a candidate for a poison apple from the get-go.

Then they got into politics and OH SH*T! That was a mistake! My sister assumed that Alla would naturally run down anything So-Vee-yet" and was surprised when Alla basically told her where to get off. But my sister took the condescending "Oh you poor, poor So-vee-yet girl. How are you adjusting to electricity?" attitude, and Alla blasted her! But Alla blasted her in her straight forward but not angry way. Sort of just enlightened the poor, ignorant mono-lingual American girl. The cat claws were barely concealed! My brother in law, just smiled. He was eating it up. He is a very well established and wealthy man and he is not at all p*ssy whipped. He kind of operates at a higher level than the women and just watches the children and smiles.

But I have to admit...wanting to move the wedding picture to the utility room wins hands down!

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

My youngest sister (Alla's age)was always the "glamorous" one. But in the looks department Alla just kinda stiff arms her on her @ss and runs her right over. Basically my sister looked in the mirror, asked "who is the fairest in the land?" and the answer was not HER. So Alla was a candidate for a poison apple from the get-go.

Then they got into politics and OH SH*T! That was a mistake! My sister assumed that Alla would naturally run down anything So-Vee-yet" and was surprised when Alla basically told her where to get off. But my sister took the condescending "Oh you poor, poor So-vee-yet girl. How are you adjusting to electricity?" attitude, and Alla blasted her! But Alla blasted her in her straight forward but not angry way. Sort of just enlightened the poor, ignorant mono-lingual American girl. The cat claws were barely concealed! My brother in law, just smiled. He was eating it up. He is a very well established and wealthy man and he is not at all p*ssy whipped. He kind of operates at a higher level than the women and just watches the children and smiles.

But I have to admit...wanting to move the wedding picture to the utility room wins hands down!

LMAO! Your sister sounds just like mine. She tried that condescending poor little Belarusian girl ####### with Kira. Kira has a PhD in veterinary medicine, speaks god only knows how many langauges... Belarusian, Russian, German, English and a smatter of Spanish, Italian, French, Polish, etc...and my sister tried to put her on the spot like Kira only came to the US to get a hot shower or some bs.

Needless to say that only happened once. Kira straightened her out in no time flat just by asking her a few questions...like could she point out Belarus on a map, where had my sister traveled to date... or even better was when she asked my sister if she knew who the US vice president was.

And the kids. My sisters kids are like terrorist gone bad. No discipline whatsoever. Kira can't handle it. In Belarus there is no grey area with the kids...they either behave or...or nothing. It's behaved and only that. Kira can't understand why my sister and brother in law don't beat their kids when they talk back to them. Well...I don't either.

Edited February 5, 2011 by Why_Me

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

LMAO! Your sister sounds just like mine. She tried that condescending poor little Belarusian girl ####### with Kira. Kira has a PhD in veterinary medicine, speaks god only knows how many langauges... Belarusian, Russian, German, English and a smatter of Spanish, Italian, French, Polish, etc...and my sister tried to put her on the spot like Kira only came to the US to get a hot shower or some bs.

Needless to say that only happened once. Kira straightened her out in no time flat just by asking her a few questions...like could she point out Belarus on a map, where had my sister traveled to date... or even better was when she asked my sister if she knew who the US vice president was.

And the kids. My sisters kids are like terrorist gone bad. No discipline whatsoever. Kira can't handle it. In Belarus there is no grey area with the kids...they either behave or...or nothing. It's behaved and only that. Kira can't understand why my sister and brother in law don't beat their kids when they talk back to them. Well...I don't either.

Hot shower!

My sister is the type that thinks "How can they be educated of they don't speak English" (except Alla DOES speak English amoung thre other languages)

She is also one of those that thinks that in the world there are two kinds of people...US citizens and all the rest that WANT to be US citizens. Imagine her shock and horror when Alla tells her that Alla had never in life considered moving to the USA until after she met me, and in fact thought the US was a bunch of stuck up capitalist pigs (because she had been denied a visa to come for a business function) who had no clue how to dress and walk in heels.

I guess it started with that. My sister said "I like your shoes ...(modest 3" heels)

but I can't wear those, they hurt my feet" Alla says "it is because you do not walk right with them, American women do not know how to walk in heels, I can show you" And she was sincere! I think my sister took it as "you are a stupid American pig-woman who doesn't know how to walk in normal women's shoes" (Alla calls high heels "normal shoes")

It went downhill from there. fast.

I agree about RUB children. I think it is not an isolated incident. Alla says she had to "beat" the boys "one time...each" After that, never again. They absolutely will NOT give Alla or I or Babushka, or anyone older than them any backtalk or attitude. EVER.

I should point out my oldest sister LOVES Alla, but she is way past the "jealous about good looks" stage of life.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

I have no problems at all with the OP's first post! It sounds just like me wife a few years ago. She was happy in Lviv, Ukraine and wanted me to move there rather than come here. Fast forward a few years and this is her home now and she has no desire to return to Ukraine.

I'll have to get my wife to come post here...but I think a few of the things she would mention:

Smooth roads almost everywhere. You'll likely have a car and the freedom to go wherever you please.

Hot water all the time. Drinkable water right out of the faucet in most places.

Huge variety of clothes/shopping. Yes we have lots of ugly clothes and Americans do often choose comfort over looks. But it's up the individual. Likewise, you can pretty much pay whatever you want for things. Want to spend a fortune...there's stores for you. Want to get lots of bang for your buck...no problem.

Huge variety of fruits/vegetables all year round. Maybe not quite as tasty in some cases, but my wife finds plenty that she likes. You have to learn to shop for certain things at certain stores.

Great dance clubs. I'm sure Kyiv has great ones as well, but some of them are really over the top here.

Great Internet speeds. Most places you can get 25/50Mbps. Getting faster all the time. Likewise, we have Netflix and other places where you can rent tons of DVDs/BluRays...high quality stuff...not grainy like tghe pirated stuff in Ukraine! You can even download stuff over the Internet in high-quality.

Lots of tasty foods and desserts (they may be a bit sweeter than what you are used to at first). It's the American weakness and why most of us are so fat. Probably the number one reason for the ugly clothes...ugly = comfortable for fat people clothes.

Easy access to cruises and stuff like that. American citizens and permanent residences can go pretty much any place without hassles.

Money. You can actually save it if you do things right!

Less corruption! The fees for things are actually official and you don't have to pay extra just to get people to do their job. Generally things are more expensive but that's why you make more money here.

The best medical care. Also expensive but again that's why you have more money here.

Better retirement/benefits. At least until we run out of money.

Most areas don't have any trash...sides of roads, parks, beaches, etc. all clean for the most part.

Friendlier people that generally will go out of their way to help you just to be nice. Goes along with all the smiling for no reason.

You will get receipts for everything you buy. You can generally take things back without any hassle. People will not try to rip you off all the time when buying things so you don't always have to be on alert for people trying to overcharge you.

You can openly defy the government or say what you want without fear of bodily harm/death.

Cheap mobile phones. Cheap electronics of all kinds.

Planes that don't make you feel like you are gambling with your life when you fly on them.

Ok...those are just a few things off the top of my head. I hope nothing is offensive...just trying to tell it like it is for the most part! I'll try to get my wife on here to post anything I forgot.

Excellent list of "pluses" I have heard of all of those from Alla. We barely got out of JFK when she arrived and said "Wow! The roads really ARE better here!" And that was NYC!

Also "not so many things are broken" Elevators work, lights work, toilets work, the water is hot, the refrigerator is cold, the house is warm in winter.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Is a visa required to enter a forum of a different region?

No, but some of us can be inadvertantly directed into other forums and realize maybe we should leave without saying anything. Or just read and learn.

Excuse me for being blunt, I am married to an FSU woman.

[slim 1,514]

http://www.forever21.com <--- Thanks for the heads up. Soon as the wife gets home from work I'm going to show her this link. The mini skirt selection on there owns.

Show her at your own peril. Forever 21 is in most malls too so it adds a few hours onto mall shopping trips. I do not accompany my wife to the mall anymore. Will not do it. If I somehow get conned into it, I grab a bite to eat, a coffee drink, and post up.

The cool thing about the Forever 21 at one of our malls here is it's sandwiched right underneath Victoria's Secret adjacent to the food court. I had the opportunity to school my little brothers one day before a Reds game. "Every woman coming to the mall goes to those two stores. Most of the time they'll head to the food court to pick up a flavored water or Starbucks or something as well since they've spent a few hours between the two of them and they're now exhausted and dehydrated from putting on and taking off clothes, checking their backsides, and walking in front of mirrors. Plus, they're carrying bags. They're thirsty! Then they head to one more place before they go - the ladies room. If you strategically position yourself at this table *here* then you'll be guaranteed an unabated view of every chick crusing the mall. Also, you don't have to break your line of sight to see them, they'll walk into your natural plane of view so you don't look like some creepy dude breaking his neck to try to catch a peep. When they walk by, smile, say hello and then get back to eating your Sbarro. P.S., this works in every country of the world."

They think I'm Yoda. - And we haven't even gotten into the Jedi mindtrick stuff yet!

we have these "Capt. save-a-ho's" coming in the RUB forum trying to save the world by bashing the OP

I couldn't have put it better myself!

As for "others" posting in the RUB forums ... you can. But do so at your own peril!

I don't mind when folks stop by.

I find it ironic they stop by and get offended. It's not like we go to their regional forums and tell them how it should be. "But VJ is for everyone. They can post here if they want to." Yes. Sure. Right. Of course they can. They should post anywhere they can help someone. Unfortunately, for many of our visitors, "help" means telling us how we should be.

Welcome to America!

None of us wise enough to choose a Russian/Ukrainian/Belarussian for a spouse need ever worry if they are secretly angry with us.

Very early on in my marriage we were visiting my mother's house to swim and have a nice family picnic. Summer BBQ, the good stuff. American tradition.

Well, for whatever reason (probably something really serious like suggesting ice in the drink) my wife went on a two-minute diatribe, complete with srhrieks, screams, all kinds of nice Russian words (which we're all glad nobody could understand, I'm sure), some items being thrown, etc., with the finer points of why I'm so stupid and inconsiderate before storming off into the house. The entire family (grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins, friends, neighbors, etc.) sat there absolutely shocked and dumbfounded at what they'd just witnessed.

- All except my step-dad. He just kind of grinned, chuckled a little bit, and said, "well, at least you'll never have to guess if she's mad."

I told my brother in law if he ever wised up and dumped my sister that I would take him to Belarus and fix him up with Kira's sister. So what does he do ? On the way back home he rats me to my sister and tells her what I said...he's like so p*ssy whipped.

Every man that has a 200+lb. couch-dweller at home is p*ssy whipped. I refuse to associate with those dudes anymore.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Show her at your own peril. Forever 21 is in most malls too so it adds a few hours onto mall shopping trips. I do not accompany my wife to the mall anymore. Will not do it. If I somehow get conned into it, I grab a bite to eat, a coffee drink, and post up.

The cool thing about the Forever 21 at one of our malls here is it's sandwiched right underneath Victoria's Secret adjacent to the food court. I had the opportunity to school my little brothers one day before a Reds game. "Every woman coming to the mall goes to those two stores. Most of the time they'll head to the food court to pick up a flavored water or Starbucks or something as well since they've spent a few hours between the two of them and they're now exhausted and dehydrated from putting on and taking off clothes, checking their backsides, and walking in front of mirrors. Plus, they're carrying bags. They're thirsty! Then they head to one more place before they go - the ladies room. If you strategically position yourself at this table *here* then you'll be guaranteed an unabated view of every chick crusing the mall. Also, you don't have to break your line of sight to see them, they'll walk into your natural plane of view so you don't look like some creepy dude breaking his neck to try to catch a peep. When they walk by, smile, say hello and then get back to eating your Sbarro. P.S., this works in every country of the world."

They think I'm Yoda. - And we haven't even gotten into the Jedi mindtrick stuff yet!

I couldn't have put it better myself!

I don't mind when folks stop by.

I find it ironic they stop by and get offended. It's not like we go to their regional forums and tell them how it should be. "But VJ is for everyone. They can post here if they want to." Yes. Sure. Right. Of course they can. They should post anywhere they can help someone. Unfortunately, for many of our visitors, "help" means telling us how we should be.

Welcome to America!

Very early on in my marriage we were visiting my mother's house to swim and have a nice family picnic. Summer BBQ, the good stuff. American tradition.

Well, for whatever reason (probably something really serious like suggesting ice in the drink) my wife went on a two-minute diatribe, complete with srhrieks, screams, all kinds of nice Russian words (which we're all glad nobody could understand, I'm sure), some items being thrown, etc., with the finer points of why I'm so stupid and inconsiderate before storming off into the house. The entire family (grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins, friends, neighbors, etc.) sat there absolutely shocked and dumbfounded at what they'd just witnessed.

- All except my step-dad. He just kind of grinned, chuckled a little bit, and said, "well, at least you'll never have to guess if she's mad."

Every man that has a 200+lb. couch-dweller at home is p*ssy whipped. I refuse to associate with those dudes anymore.

I always wondered what would happen if we went into their forums, even by mistake, and start to preach on whatever...maybe Muslim men wanting their US wives to convert to Islam. Or why Philippine women seem to have to try and bring all their brothers and sisters and cousins and until they are here they have to send them money. And what is uo with all the Pinays jumping in a trying to run the visa process? Do you ever see a RUB woman on here saying "What should I be telling my US citizen fiance to do next...?" I mean I could go into those forums and say a lot of things, but why would I? Or we could go to the Canada forum and tell everyone to "Have a Nice Day! "

I mean jeezum! Someone with a spouse from Nigeria scolds a Ukrainian woman for how she asks a question in the RUB forum????????????? The same woman, Inna, posted a question in Russian in another thread and a Drive-by Einstein scolded her for using Russian in the RUB forum! No wonder she is scared to come to the USA. They are trying to "politically correct" her already!

Maybe we should all just post in Russian!

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

The cool thing about the Forever 21 at one of our malls here is it's sandwiched right underneath Victoria's Secret adjacent to the food court. I had the opportunity to school my little brothers one day before a Reds game. "Every woman coming to the mall goes to those two stores. Most of the time they'll head to the food court to pick up a flavored water or Starbucks or something as well since they've spent a few hours between the two of them and they're now exhausted and dehydrated from putting on and taking off clothes, checking their backsides, and walking in front of mirrors. Plus, they're carrying bags. They're thirsty! Then they head to one more place before they go - the ladies room. If you strategically position yourself at this table *here* then you'll be guaranteed an unabated view of every chick crusing the mall. Also, you don't have to break your line of sight to see them, they'll walk into your natural plane of view so you don't look like some creepy dude breaking his neck to try to catch a peep. When they walk by, smile, say hello and then get back to eating your Sbarro. P.S., this works in every country of the world."

They think I'm Yoda. - And we haven't even gotten into the Jedi mindtrick stuff yet!

I used to ride the bus to work in Odessa even though I had a private driver. The driver had warned me that being the guy with a private driver showing up to a construction site with 400 construction workers of "mixed FSU pedigree" who work 70 hours a week for $300 per month, may not be a good idea. But the REAL reason was that the bus was the hottest damn fashion show you ever wanted to see! I met so many women at the bus stop and on the bus, it was better than any club! Plus you are an American guy going to work (and probably not for $300 per month!) This may not work in all countries, in fact, here, it may get you arrested, but I used to just look for women who were struggling with bags or brief case or whatever and just take them and say "I will help you" Now a Ukrainian woman knows better than to refuse help from a man. Why should SHE carry the heavy bag when she can get a man to do it? It is, in fact, how I met Alla. And you know, that a favor deserves and requires a "payment in kind" so it usually resulted in an offer to have coffee, lunch or just to meet up for an evening walk.

Tell your brothers to get their @ss over to Ukraine and help some women on the bus!

[slim 1,514]

Tell your brothers to get their @ss over to Ukraine and help some women on the bus!

I have one brother who just might do it. He's into new and exciting experiences and loves a little variety in his life. The ladies love him already but he's smart enough to not set his goals too low. "Why settle for hamburger when you can go out for cutleti?" He also likes two or three cutlets at once. He's a growing boy!

My youngest brother, he's going to be a millionaire - provided what he does is legal. He's only 12 right now but he spent the summer making PowerPoint presentations because "he was bored." Where'd he learn PowerPoint? "I just kind of taught myself. It's not that hard." This is the same kid who set up a ponzi scheme using Pokemon cards and birthday money... in grade school! I think he's going to be this guy someday -

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=22XqBLDDrU4&feature=related

[mckay76 11]

Show her at your own peril. Forever 21 is in most malls too so it adds a few hours onto mall shopping trips. I do not accompany my wife to the mall anymore. Will not do it. If I somehow get conned into it, I grab a bite to eat, a coffee drink, and post up.

The cool thing about the Forever 21 at one of our malls here is it's sandwiched right underneath Victoria's Secret adjacent to the food court. I had the opportunity to school my little brothers one day before a Reds game. "Every woman coming to the mall goes to those two stores. Most of the time they'll head to the food court to pick up a flavored water or Starbucks or something as well since they've spent a few hours between the two of them and they're now exhausted and dehydrated from putting on and taking off clothes, checking their backsides, and walking in front of mirrors. Plus, they're carrying bags. They're thirsty! Then they head to one more place before they go - the ladies room. If you strategically position yourself at this table *here* then you'll be guaranteed an unabated view of every chick crusing the mall. Also, you don't have to break your line of sight to see them, they'll walk into your natural plane of view so you don't look like some creepy dude breaking his neck to try to catch a peep. When they walk by, smile, say hello and then get back to eating your Sbarro. P.S., this works in every country of the world."

They think I'm Yoda. - And we haven't even gotten into the Jedi mindtrick stuff yet!