Dealing with the waiting game

[Lucy NY 1]

Hi everyone,

I wanted to post in relation to the stress and how everyone deals with the magic K1 waiting game, in particular the wait for the NOA2.

I find I drive myself nuts checking the website and wandering when it is going to be. My dear OH lets say takes a much more relaxed approach. How does everyone cope with the waiting and being apart from each other? Each day goes by and you go about your day to day business but sometimes when I think too much about it I start to think how annoying, unfair and frustrating this process is and what the heck takes so long!

Anyone else get sick of people asking the same question 'have you not gone to the states yet' 'why is it taking so long? I'm like you tell me, I don't know so don't ask me!!

Any tips other than ' just keep checking' or 'be patient' - ive had that too many times and starting to lose patience with the damn immigration system.

Sorry had to vent

[patient2010 93]

Hi everyone,

I wanted to post in relation to the stress and how everyone deals with the magic K1 waiting game, in particular the wait for the NOA2.

I find I drive myself nuts checking the website and wandering when it is going to be. My dear OH lets say takes a much more relaxed approach. How does everyone cope with the waiting and being apart from each other? Each day goes by and you go about your day to day business but sometimes when I think too much about it I start to think how annoying, unfair and frustrating this process is and what the heck takes so long!

Anyone else get sick of people asking the same question 'have you not gone to the states yet' 'why is it taking so long? I'm like you tell me, I don't know so don't ask me!!

Any tips other than ' just keep checking' or 'be patient' - ive had that too many times and starting to lose patience with the damn immigration system.

Sorry had to vent

Nothing wrong with venting we all have our days. i feel your pain especially that NOA2 pain...my only advice is take it one dat at a time...do something around the house I would paint I now have so many new walls in my house I would think about the wedding and put together a plan I even went wedding dress shopping. I prayed a lot as well....I too feel that the system is so unfair but your time will come my dear and once that NOA2 comes your days will go by faster and since you in the UK you should get an interview date sooner than later unlike Nigeria where I was approved in June but no interview until November which I think is insane...but I digress... well I hope your days get better...good luck the rest of the way oh PS stop checking the USCIS website because sometimes that thing never change you will just get NOA2 in the mail without any notice.....it has happened before....

[Harsh_77 716]

Its alright nothing to worry, just relax and things will be ok.

[thescreecher 0]

I'm going through exactly the same thing and it sucks. I work on a computer all day and I'm forever checking my status. On the outside I'm calm but my hair is falling out like never before so I must be stressed on the inside. Don't know if it would help you but I've joined a gym to try and keep myself busier in the evenings (instead of wallowing in self-pity at home) and also so I look my best in my wedding dress!

My work contract ends on October 31st so I've been thinking of flying over in November so I can spend Christmas and my birthday (February) with Tony, but it would be soooooo typical that everything would start moving along just as I've spent all that money on a flight and would have to pay more money to rearrange it or fly back! It's really hard to know what to do.

I've only been waiting for just over a month and I'm already going crazy so it must be really hard for those waiting so much longer. Positive thoughts to everyone x

[NigeriaorBust 4,087]

Just look at others that are in a worse state. The people from slower places ( like Nigeria ) the people that suffer issues ( I had to do Nigeria TWICE ) and people that are lost in AP. ( When I went through there was this sweetheart of a woman that was stuck in AP and who acted like a Walmart greeter for every new person on the board) Gather a list of places you two will eat together, clean your closet out again to make room for him. Find something from his country to show him , a British pub and African restaurant , go find something new for both of you ( which ever above isn't "his" type of place ) Have some of your pictures together blown and hand on the wall. Find out how to subscribe to the soccer channel. Learn something special to cook.

[Lucy NY 1]

I'm going through exactly the same thing and it sucks. I work on a computer all day and I'm forever checking my status. On the outside I'm calm but my hair is falling out like never before so I must be stressed on the inside. Don't know if it would help you but I've joined a gym to try and keep myself busier in the evenings (instead of wallowing in self-pity at home) and also so I look my best in my wedding dress!

My work contract ends on October 31st so I've been thinking of flying over in November so I can spend Christmas and my birthday (February) with Tony, but it would be soooooo typical that everything would start moving along just as I've spent all that money on a flight and would have to pay more money to rearrange it or fly back! It's really hard to know what to do.

I've only been waiting for just over a month and I'm already going crazy so it must be really hard for those waiting so much longer. Positive thoughts to everyone x

I know I agree, I have been doing everything to try and keep busy but sometimes I feel so frustrated and im so tired of it all that I dont have the energy to do stuff to keep me busy!! I work two jobs, so that keeps me busy I guess and its all wedding funds and visa funds. I guess I just sick to the back teeth of it all and then that puts pressure on the couple in question, not only are you trying to keep a long distance ( and i mean long distance!) thing going but your also almost frustrated with each other because you havent seen each other. Its all blah

I just find it so unfair that it is clearly not done in first come first serve order, and I think thats one major frustration as some people's fly through and others wait for months and months. So your sat there thinking when the hell is mine going to be stamped!! The OH is coming here in September and that will of been 6 months since I last saw him but then hes here for a week and then the whole waiting game starts over again!!

[Gingerpants 8]

I know how you feel, everyone keeps asking when we're leaving for the states and I keep having to give these tentative answers. And because of some complicated circumstances we've had to move out to the middle of nowhere with my future mother in-law until the K1 is approved and so far it's been nightmarish! We've gone from city life to country life and there's absolutely nothing to do out here and I usually get along with my fiance's mother but lately she's just been losing the plot at every turn.

So needless to say I too have been checking our status constantly and dreaming of NOA2 day.

Ah but I really shouldn't complain too much since I know I'm lucky enough not to have to be separated for months at a time.

[Gingerpants 8]

Here Lucy, this website is great for passing the time: Polyvore

The guys may not find it too interesting but it's great fun if you like being creative or if you want to put together an outfit or even plan a wedding

Edited August 27, 2010 by Gingerpants

[Lucy NY 1]

Thanks Gingerpants, I shall take a look. I too, am dreaming of NOA2 day and the day I walk out of the american embassy with that visa on its way and the moment I arrive in the states and for once im not on borrowed time....and getting married of course lol

I know all my friends are like well its got to be soon surely, and to try and explain the process over and over again its sometimes like way too much effort! And then u get the questions why is it taking so long and all u can say is I have no bloody idea!! Stop asking me!! I just wish there was a light at the end of the tunnel so it gives you a date to work for. the thought of all this lasting until like next summer is just too much to bear.

Its just so hard and I kow we will get through it but sometimes u just feel so miserable about it all. And everyones is like oh cheer up it will happen soon, and by the end of the day u just want to chuck something at them!!

[bobby_kvisa 7]

Something that will for sure take the heat off of waiting will be planning a second / follow-up meeting with your fiance.

This may or may not be possible, due to work schedules, distance and so forth. But if it is possible planning or arranging to meet again (even with 2-3 months advance notice) makes the wait for some sort of status update in the process so much more bearable.

You have something else to occupy your mind rather than worrying - which will be meeting again.

[Penny Lane 8,159]

Something that will for sure take the heat off of waiting will be planning a second / follow-up meeting with your fiance.

This may or may not be possible, due to work schedules, distance and so forth. But if it is possible planning or arranging to meet again (even with 2-3 months advance notice) makes the wait for some sort of status update in the process so much more bearable.

You have something else to occupy your mind rather than worrying - which will be meeting again.

This is my plan. I'm fortunate enough to be able to visit my fiance, so I will break up the waiting with a visit every couple months. Gives me something else to look forward to/focus on.

[Lucy NY 1]

Something that will for sure take the heat off of waiting will be planning a second / follow-up meeting with your fiance.

This may or may not be possible, due to work schedules, distance and so forth. But if it is possible planning or arranging to meet again (even with 2-3 months advance notice) makes the wait for some sort of status update in the process so much more bearable.

You have something else to occupy your mind rather than worrying - which will be meeting again.

Thanks Bobby- we see each other as much as possible and he is due over in a few weeks which I can not wait for.......even though i am mega excited about seeing him, there is always that horrible feeling of him having to go home and the whole missing each other starts over again but hey ho - can not wait for him to get here already

[Gingerpants 8]

Thanks Gingerpants, I shall take a look. I too, am dreaming of NOA2 day and the day I walk out of the american embassy with that visa on its way and the moment I arrive in the states and for once im not on borrowed time....and getting married of course lol

I know all my friends are like well its got to be soon surely, and to try and explain the process over and over again its sometimes like way too much effort! And then u get the questions why is it taking so long and all u can say is I have no bloody idea!! Stop asking me!! I just wish there was a light at the end of the tunnel so it gives you a date to work for. the thought of all this lasting until like next summer is just too much to bear.

Its just so hard and I kow we will get through it but sometimes u just feel so miserable about it all. And everyones is like oh cheer up it will happen soon, and by the end of the day u just want to chuck something at them!!

Yeah it would be lovely if they could give a date to look forward to instead of a vague estimate. Before we started the process I'd heard it would take at least 9 months to get the K1 so once I started realising people we getting their within 3 and 4 months I felt more positive about the whole thing. But now even that feels like an eternity when the end is so uncertain!

[CBM 14]

Lucy - I totally understand the love/sad feeling of the visit. My fiance and I have been together over 2 years now, and we have been waiting 88 days now for NoA2. I took a year off between years of uni to spend more time in the US with him, which was amazing, but now I'm back in Canada working my summer job and doing my teaching credentials, so we only get few & far between visits, compared to last year.

He is coming to visit me at uni in September (3 weeks from today!!)... and obviously I'm excited and so happy... but at the same time, I know as soon as he leaves again, I'll be missing him like crazy and feel miserable until I get into my routine again, with day to day stuff, and whatnot.

I have been trying to think about it, but still pray every single day for our NoA2. I also plan things for the wedding, and look at wedding things online and such.

I feel your pain and I'll keep you in my thoughts for NoA2's

[tooduhri 0]

Also waiting for NOA2 for IR/CR.. Glad I am not the only one pulling hairs out..