The Vent - Part Trois

[Danu 19]

with regards to the dog poop issue, My dogs were trained to poop on the street if we weren't at home. We did this because even if you pick it up, there could be poop smudges on the lawn that the little ones play in then, and I think thats gross. Of course I picked it up off the street too.

[Rhiannercakes 14]

with regards to the dog poop issue, My dogs were trained to poop on the street if we weren't at home. We did this because even if you pick it up, there could be poop smudges on the lawn that the little ones play in then, and I think thats gross. Of course I picked it up off the street too.

That's a good idea actually.

My dog's poop doesn't really seem to smear though, but seriously, good idea Danu.

[Autumnchik 6]

Mother Nature apparently doesn't care that it is April 28 and we should be having sunshine and warm weather, not a freaking snowstorm!!! Can someone remind me why I chose to move from Georgia to New Hampshire?

[darkchilde794 5]

Care First Blue Shields suck. They should call themselves Money First Blue Shields instead.

I purchase individual insurance from said company and have been paying my premiums on a timely fashion since January. But then while paying for the April premium, they double debited me and then pretended to return the amount to my bank and tell me that I have not paid for my insurance.

Complete bullcrap. Hubby and I saw that they took payment from us TWICE and did not return the payment at all. So after battling customer service for almost a week (we tried to call them, we were on hold for 45 minutes, we then wrote them emails, no replies, call again, and again, and again, and again), we finally got in touch with some decent billing department person who said that we have to contact our bank, who will contact their company, and then our payment will be returned. In the mean time, Care First recognizes that I'm covered for April and that I need to only pay for May.

Well last night someone sends us a reply to the email we sent asking for clarification about my case. They wrote that they returned the payment (no such thing), and that I am not covered for April. UGH. Not again. So here I am, trying to get in touch with someone from this insurance company from hell... finally got in touch with another billing person, who has no idea what's going on, and then transfers me to members services, and I've been on hold for 20 minutes.

My premium is only 73 dollars... it's such a small amount of money. But I do not like being stolen from... no matter what the amount. AND there is just no way they can compensate the hours I've accumulated on hold waiting for them to do "customer service".

*SCREAM*

[SapphireDreams 71]

^^ That sucks Dark, that's exactly why I would opt to pay more for my employer's coverage. I hope things work out!

About the dog poop on lawns, my in-laws dog is a city dog, so he goes on the sidewalk, but i mean I think it's a little silly to not let a dog poop on a lawn if the owner picks it up. The ground is dirty no matter what and it's going to rain eventually! It's not like people are going to be eating on their lawns. I dunno maybe I'm just jaded from living in dirty NYC, haha.

My rant: I have the WORST cold sore ever on my lip. I think it has its own heart beat. I am SO lucky I found a tube of LipActin from Canada to use on it. That's the only thing that works for me and they don't sell it in the US. And, luckily I'm going to Canada this weekend, so I can stock up on some more!

[Rhiannercakes 14]

Numerous things about this family bothers me.

The main thing though that stands out though is that they don't recycle.

Coming from Canada, it's like we were born with a recycling gene and I absolutely hate it when they put something recyclable into the garbage. My mother in law is okay with it, she'll put the newspaper n stuff in the recycle but will throw away plastic and cans.

My father in law throws away everything. If I see something I'll usually pluck it out of the garbage and put it in the recycle.

At least once a day I give my husband "the eye" and say "That's recyclable, you better not be throwing that out." He calls me Mrs. Green Earth.

The question, "Is this recyclable?" here (In Cali anyway) seems to be different than what I'm used to. First time I visited I used a can of something and I asked if it was recyclable, my husband said no. I looked at him funny and explained that it'd be stupid if it wasn't recyclable, he said that we can't get money for it. I was like, "Whaa?" because I didn't know that they get money for their cans and some bottles. He made me think the only things they recycle are things that you paid CRV (some deposit when you buy certain things)for.

Amazing how a single question can be taken two totally separate ways. I still though am a bit blown away by how much recyclable stuff this household tries to throw away though. :/

[trailmix 77]

My father in law throws away everything. If I see something I'll usually pluck it out of the garbage and put it in the recycle.

Good way to handle that Rhianner - since you are living in their domain you can't tell them what to do, since that would be rude, but just taking the stuff out yourself is a great idea.

My vent - we have just been without television and internet since last night at 7. It just went *poof* for no particular reason. So Telus guy comes out today - it was actually something to do with their network - nothing to do with the wiring or equipment at our house. Then just before he is finished I notice that we can't get HD networks on our television - now that was a cable problem, probably triggered when he moved the cable box, turns out the original installers were supposed to give us new cables and didn't.

Anyway, working now.

[darkchilde794 5]

I am so bummed.

My MIL had the talk with the WIL tonight. The WIL shed a few tears, "appeared" vulnerable, and claimed ignorance over her bad behavior. Now my MIL thinks that the WIL is hard and strong outside but is really shy, sensitive, vulnerable inside. My husband and I were listening to her (MIL) relate this evening's events over the speaker phone, and both of us thought, where is this bullsh*t coming from???

I know I've whined/vented about the WIL so many times but I really just need to get this off my chest.

Anyway several years ago, we caught the WIL spanking my BIL's son. She claimed that it was a play spank... but she basically took my nephew (who was 5 at that time), laid him on her lap and spanked his bottom. My MIL told my BIL and my BIL was furious with her.

Anyway tonight's talk was supposed to be how the WIL has poorly treated my MIL in the last year, and especially the last 4 months. Instead, the talk revolved around the fact that the WIL felt that the entire family has ganged up on her for the one little mistake she made with my nephew. That she really loves my nephew but now she's the child abuser because she made that little mistake that she didn't think was a big deal at all.

So of course my MIL tried to comfort her and went on and on about how hard it is to be in a relationship with someone with a child... and that mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationships are really difficult... blahblahblahblahblah...

When MIL told WIL that she does not appreciate the rude behavior of the WIL, the WIL completely denied any such thing. WIL claimed that MIL was just overly tired from work and is so sensitive and that WIL wasn't blowing her off etc.

And then MIL brought up the incident at my wedding, when the entire family was supposed to go back to her house for a toast for our marriage... and WIL wanted to go home instead and quasi made a scene... and WIL's response was in the realm of, Yeah I guess that was not something I should have done... I need to think about it.

Anyway bottom line is, in this entire talk, WIL admitted to doing nothing wrong... except for maybe that tiny incident of spanking, which she is now beginning to realize was not good behavior. WIL has not admitted to her bad behavior, has not apologized. And MIL has basically not settled any issues with her, but she is now in the process of forgiving the WIL and now everything is great and okay... and she (MIL) is so happy because she made WIL think about her actions.

After the conversation, my husband looked at me and went... "Earlier today I was thinking of what was happening tonight. The Caps are playing... my mom is having the talk with the b*tch. I really want the Caps to win. But then I thought, if the Caps losing meant my mom will have a productive talk with the witch and really drive her point, I don't mind the Caps losing. And now the Caps are losing and my mom has accomplished nothing."

I'm really sorry for this so long of a post, but I am really, really sad. I am really disappointed in my MIL, but I knew that she would crumble at the sight of tears and show of the tiniest repentance. I also feel trapped because while my MIL is willing to forgive and forget... nothing's changed between the b*tch and I. I intend to still alienate her from my life and I am done with second or third or fourth chances. But now I suspect that in every family event, she will try to be so nice and sweet to me, and if I act indifferent, I will be viewed as the bad person.

I'm also really disappointed because last night, my husband and I sat down with her to prepare her for this evening's talk (I think she is scared of the WIL). And while I admit I can understand that she does not want to completely blow the WIL off, I also think that she was too forgiving.

Anyway my husband is even more bummed because the Caps are obviously off the playoffs.

Edited April 29, 2010 by darkchilde794

[Sprailenes 47]

She's making herself out to be the victim. Your MIL probably doesn't want to go on with the conflict and probably is really trying very hard to just forgive and forget. It's harder for you because you're not the mother of the family. I imagine your MIL just wants things to run smoothly.

Oh and the spanking incident? Unacceptable. But again she's making herself out to be the victim. Things will never change with her and that kind of sucks. You could talk to her but she will probably turn it around on you somehow.

Oh and I was so angry that the caps lost too.

[darkchilde794 5]

Yeah, my husband said the same thing. A lot depended on last night's conversation and we both hoped that once MIL gets her points across, the WIL will own up to her mistakes and explain why she's a raving, lunatic b*tch. But she's turned it all around and now she's the one oppressed and has admitted to nothing. She's that good

I don't think I will talk to her... there's no point. I will talk to my MIL though. Before last night, we predicted that there will be a 90% that the wedding will be cancelled. After last night, that prediction significantly dropped to 10%...

Prior to all the ####### that went on within the last few months (WIL open aggression to MIL), MIL will try to cover up WIL's poor behavior towards me. And when I would bring it up to MIL, she will make excuses for the witch. And then during gatherings, if both the WIL and I are there, my MIL will pay more attention to the WIL because she doesn't want people to think she's playing favorites between the two of us. I think it's also because my MIL is to win the witch's approval.

Well now that there's just no way this wedding will end, my MIL needs to know that all that ####### has to stop. I refuse to not feel validated for my anger to the witch. I also refuse to keep quiet if the witch is being openly nasty, as I have in the past. And I want my MIL to respect that, and in turn, I will respect her decision to forgive and forget.

I have had some time to really think about situation and I thought... you know what... if this is the worst thing in my life, I can handle it. My husband and I seem to have a good marriage (knock on wood), we're both healthy, we love and truly care for each others' parents... There is this one really bad thing that goes on in our lives... but we know her name and we know how to deal with her

[Sprailenes 47]

Well I understand how it is with in-laws. It's hard to take the high road too when someone is being that way. Also it's hard to not allow it to consume you. Whenever my MIL does something catty, I am on fire for a good week. I don't just forgive and forget. I also don't sweep matters under the rug, I married into a family that does that so it's a little strange.

All I can say is that it is unlikely this marriage will work out in the long run. She'll probably turn into a troll after they say their "I do's"

First a witch, then a troll... the progression of evil...

Edited April 29, 2010 by Sprailenes

[The_Dude 1,142]

I quit smoking cigarettes almost 5 years ago. But I didn't really quit completely. I usually will buy a pack once a year and smoke a cigarette. I do it to get sick, and remind myself of how disgusting a habit it is. I will get so nauseated and sick that the mere thought of a cigarette will make me ill even 6 months later.

So, I took my wife to the airport last night for her well overdue trip back home to visit her family. I went to the market after to get a pack of cigarettes. I was absolutely sick when I saw that cigarettes are now $7 in los angeles.

[Ban Hammer 12,876]

I quit smoking cigarettes almost 5 years ago. But I didn't really quit completely. I usually will buy a pack once a year and smoke a cigarette. I do it to get sick, and remind myself of how disgusting a habit it is. I will get so nauseated and sick that the mere thought of a cigarette will make me ill even 6 months later.

So, I took my wife to the airport last night for her well overdue trip back home to visit her family. I went to the market after to get a pack of cigarettes. I was absolutely sick when I saw that cigarettes are now $7 in los angeles.

see what taxes do? the same effect and you didn't even have to buy anything!

[darkchilde794 5]

All I can say is that it is unlikely this marriage will work out in the long run. She'll probably turn into a troll after they say their "I do's"

First a witch, then a troll... the progression of evil...

Yes, that is what Im worried about. Oh well.

Troll-in-Law. Hmm... nice ring to it...!

[Rhiannercakes 14]

Haha, Troll-in-law.

I like it.