Starting over ...

[Henia 11]

Hello everyone! And sending everyone our holiday wishes!

I guess I'll post this in this area, since it's the most appropiate ... I have been out of the US for over 3 years now. Went throu the INS process with success, but didn't use the visa in the end due to various personal reasons. Now, we sit here again thinking back to our orginal plan ... going to the US.

My question is this ... 3 years out of the country ... add baby, medical problems into the mix and very little money to start with ... I am wondering what's going on in the US? How is the econmony ... I read and read (plus what friends tell me) ... not good from I read ... but is it so bad that we shouldn't bother to come back? Maybe this is funny to even ask ... but we are trying to weigh our options here.

So anyway ... here is my situation ... maybe everyone out there can give me (us) some advice ... on what to except upon our return ...

We are family of 4 (2 adults and 2 kids ... one of which is baby so extra expenses)

My husband (the beneficionary) is currently the breadwinner. He has a degree in finance (but not even sure he could use it in the US) But obviously I will have to work but ideally would like to spent my time with my children if I could.

We could live with my mum for a while ... but forever obviously.

We would be moving back to Michigan, where as I am reading it's getting worse and worse. Is it?

We barely have any saving. Most of our money would go to INS and travel expenses ... little left as start up for the US.

I need medical care, that I cannot get here.

I am wondering the following ...

Am I crazy? Should we even bother? Can this work?

How much can I except to spend (on average) for family of 4? Same as 3 yrs ago or much much more? I look usually on shopping sites ... like Target, eBay ... etc everything seems to be getting cheaper, not more expensive.

How much should we save for a little start up?

How is the job market?

Thanks everyone ... really appreciate everyone taking the time to reply to this. And wishing all a great Christmas and New Year!

[merijan 0]

Hello everyone! And sending everyone our holiday wishes!

I guess I'll post this in this area, since it's the most appropiate ... I have been out of the US for over 3 years now. Went throu the INS process with success, but didn't use the visa in the end due to various personal reasons. Now, we sit here again thinking back to our orginal plan ... going to the US.

My question is this ... 3 years out of the country ... add baby, medical problems into the mix and very little money to start with ... I am wondering what's going on in the US? How is the econmony ... I read and read (plus what friends tell me) ... not good from I read ... but is it so bad that we shouldn't bother to come back? Maybe this is funny to even ask ... but we are trying to weigh our options here.

So anyway ... here is my situation ... maybe everyone out there can give me (us) some advice ... on what to except upon our return ...

We are family of 4 (2 adults and 2 kids ... one of which is baby so extra expenses)

My husband (the beneficionary) is currently the breadwinner. He has a degree in finance (but not even sure he could use it in the US) But obviously I will have to work but ideally would like to spent my time with my children if I could.

We could live with my mum for a while ... but forever obviously.

We would be moving back to Michigan, where as I am reading it's getting worse and worse. Is it?

We barely have any saving. Most of our money would go to INS and travel expenses ... little left as start up for the US.

I need medical care, that I cannot get here.

I am wondering the following ...

Am I crazy? Should we even bother? Can this work?

How much can I except to spend (on average) for family of 4? Same as 3 yrs ago or much much more? I look usually on shopping sites ... like Target, eBay ... etc everything seems to be getting cheaper, not more expensive.

How much should we save for a little start up?

How is the job market?

Thanks everyone ... really appreciate everyone taking the time to reply to this. And wishing all a great Christmas and New Year!

You seem to have adjusted well there and if things are good there , you have love and support of family there is better. Here its getting worse, I am now married again, I have three kids, and we spend sooo much on groceries and we dont eat good whole meals everyday.

We are alone. I mean my family lives here but they are not close to us. They are not Muslim. And we have no familys that are muslim we are close to. We are on our own, if anything happens to us we have no one close to be there . I know the culture there is family is always around. You are never alone. Sometimes to the extreme that you want privacy..LOL.

But if you come back it should be soon because its cheaper right now to buy a house than ever before , its a buyers market right now.

Good luck with your decision. Just pray and do Istaqara(special prayer for guidence on decisions.)

Salam

[brnidokiegurl 0]

i cant begin to know the answers but as for jobs here unemployment is at a all time high im sure you will need to depend on family for some time, jobs are there, but maybe not what you would exactly want to walk into. No doubt it would be hard starting over but with the medical i see you have no choice. Maybe after the first of the year and president change things will start to change but i think it will be a slow process in improving as far a economy. Maybe if you cant see a complete move can just you and the kids come for sometime just to get things started and seek the medical your son needs while your husband would keep working to save for the future then after you have a better grasp on things he could come

[Henia 11]

Thank you both for your replies. Helpful indeed to see your opinions.

True, if it were not for my sons health I would not even dare dream up this idea to return to states (with our limited resources).... virtually no care here for neutrological conditions ....

[alienlovechild 75]

In the short run you're going to pay to transition costs and re-enter a shaky economy especially if you're headed to Michigan. Most of your and your husband's overseas job experience will count for little and you might have to accept work you would have shun before.

We could live with my mum for a while ... but forever obviously. We would be moving back to Michigan, where as I am reading it's getting worse and worse. Is it? We barely have any saving. I need medical care, that I cannot get here.

There are a lot more adults living with their parents for various reasons so it doesn't have the stigma it used to. Michigan has highest unemployment rate in the nation at 9.6%. http://money.cnn.com/pf/features/lists/state_unemployment/

How much can I except to spend (on average) for family of 4? Same as 3 yrs ago or much much more?

Inflation hasn't gone up much and some worry about deflation. The only thing that really went up were oil prices and they have dropped dramatically lately.

[brnidokiegurl 0]

things are tight now but your number one priority has to be your sons health at whatever cost or inconviences, what does your family here say, are they able to help, is there room, family in another states? can they watch the kids while you work, will he watch the kids while you work if he needs to, can you send emails to jobs you would have done before you left to see if you would walk into a job waiting for you etc

[onuche 0]

I am one of those who believe in keeping all options open, there is a saying that man proposes God disposes, the economy might be bad but who knows what the situation would be like two three yrs down the road.

Just as this post suggests, your number one priority should be your children. Life is tough everywhere, not just in the states. Right now you are planning on coming back to MI, but you never know, you might not even end up there. I would suggest you look at all your options, right now you have limited resources you said but, if you can at least start the process and see where that leads to. If at the end you decide not to come then fine, but at least you would have other options.

Also, it just occurred to me, you are the USC right? shouldn't your kids have citizenship through you?

[geezer 1]

I'd agree with the other comments about the economy. I lived in Michigan for awhile. Right now they have the highest unemployment in the nation and its only going to get higher. I'd think its would be very very difficult for your husband to find work there in his field. He needs to be prepared to basically take anything...janitor, work at MacDonalds whatever..some people are not wellng able to do that so you need to be honest to each other about that.

It sounds like you will need a sponser for your husband and possibably your children(?) based upon their citezenship. This might be very difficult to find given your childs potential medical bills, the sponser is on the hook for ten years and unfortunately given your financial condition they might be reluctant to sign.

Are there options for medical treatment in other countries, or could you and/or your husband get a job in a third country with a company that might provide medical benefits?

I wish you good luck a sick child is any parents worst nightmare..

[Henia 11]

things are tight now but your number one priority has to be your sons health at whatever cost or inconviences, what does your family here say, are they able to help, is there room, family in another states? can they watch the kids while you work, will he watch the kids while you work if he needs to, can you send emails to jobs you would have done before you left to see if you would walk into a job waiting for you etc

Brneygrl:Yes, definately my son's is TOP priority now. My mum, who we would be living with can only help so much, as she is elderly and living on a pension from her recently deceased husband. But of course, she is all for the grandchildren caring for them, babysitting whatever ... no family in other states (my mum is all my family. No siblings and uncles ... father, aunts deceased). I have contacted agency I used to work for. Didn't reply back ... so I e-mail old collegues ... sorry to say it was closed - everyone let go. So no help there ... and where I used to live did not have high need my degree (before coming to DZ, planned on moving where there are jobs in my profession)

Ounche: Yes, God does work in mysterious ways ... who knows what tomorrow will be bring very very true. Yes, I am the US mom ... so yes, citizenship from me. My daughter born in US has it ... but my son, 3m old hasn't (yet) currently in contact with embassy on this matter.

Geezer: Didn't even occur to me we would get denied cos of my son's health. I will have to look into this. But thanks for bringing it up. France is our next opinion for treatment ,,, my husband has family there and connections. But we will see how that goes ... I have heard France is tougher then the US. Husband's firmpays all our medical bills ... problem is treatment not availible for what my son has.

Thanks everyone ...Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

[AlHayatZween 2]

Salaam Henia,

i am so sorry to hear about your son's health and it sounds like you are in a very tight situation right now.

me, too, i was living outside of the country for a few years and when i returned (last fall 2008), i was surprised how much the costs of everything had increased. that was a year ago, and i have witnessed the economy get steadily worse and the unemployment rates steadily rising. i only hear on the news that Michigan is getting hit quite harder these days because of the decline in the auto industry, but this is only what i hear in the news.

the thing that concerns me the most is how you will be able to get/afford good quality health care for your son when you come here. if you get a job with insurance toute suite, then you'll be fine. but if not, it could be a rough couple of months and financially devastating if he were in need of immediate/emergency care. (i don't know what his condition is, but being without health insurance is really tough here... especially when you are sick!) that being said, if you have exhausted all medical options in Algeria, then i guess you have to do what you have to do... investigating what can be done in France sounds like a good option, too.

i wish you luck (F) (F)

hz