Homesickness

[Peggy 1]

I still miss my home in Nova Scotia. My son and parents mostly. I have a lot of great friends at home that I miss alot especailly when I want to chill with some girls. That part sucks.

My son and I are flying home this summer for two weeks.

We have not been home since we moved here 3 years ago.

I find women are nice here, but not like my crazy canadian girl friends. We always had so much fun.

You just get used to being away from them. It takes a long time for some, other's it doesnt bother when they move.

[catrocks 0]

I'm sorry you're homesick Kat. People here tend to assume that it's easier to assimilate to life in the US when you're coming from the UK, as they are such "similar" countries. Honestly, I found it easier to assimilate when I lived in Belgium and didn't speak the language!

It takes time. It would be good if you could meet up with some other Brits, that has helped me a lot. Try to make the most of living here - like other people have said it's never going to be the same as your life in the UK was, but that doesn't mean that it can't be good. Volunteer, go to meetup groups, get a dog (or borrow someone's) and go to the dog park.

I've heard that it takes 3 years to totally assimilate to life in a new country.

[Krikit 1,163]

Awww. I'm sorry you're homesick, Kat. It's a terrible feeling.

I found the best thing to help me through homesickness is to go back for a visit. You'll be wanting to come home in no time. Seriously, though.... you really will appreciate your home here in the US more. The other thing that's nice about visits is you get to remember how things weren't perfect there and neither were your friends and family. You tend to forget that kind of thing when you're focusing on being homesick.

Last night my husband picked me up from the airport after a visit to Canada. I said "It's nice to be home." He smiled at me and said "It's nice to hear you say that." I guess I hadn't been referring to the US as home. And he said usually all he hears from me is "You Americans <fill in the blank>."

Anyway, it does take some time. And it is nice to go home. But it's always nice to come back to your new life and the home you've made with your husband.

[VisaJourneyLady 33]

i moved from ireland to london, and you'd think that would be an easy transition, but you get to realise that sometimes it's not always things being different that is the hardest thing.

I could be wrong, but I'd say the the period between 6-8 months and 2 - 2.5 years is the hardest. Mostly because when you get somewhere first there are all the things to sort out and the adjustments are more like getting used to the new area, new shops, new job and all that stuff. It's only after a while that things settle down. I think that here the 2nd year was harder than the first year. My friends at home were (how rude) continuing their lives without me, and enough time had elapsed that I no longer knew everything that was going on with them, and yet I couldn't say that I had any really close friends here.

And I think that in the end missing people is the hardest thing. Friends and family are the people you turn to when times are tough, and it can be hard when you don't have the same support systems in place. But it does happen eventually. It takes a long time to build up really strong relationships with people. I found that at first I was kind of waiting for friends to just happen, it didn't really happen. I found that for the first time in my life I sort of had to persue finding friends, I do have people I can call here now, and I know I can do it all again in the US, but I know that it takes a while.

Sorry if i've gone on for a while, it was a bit of a ramble, but I just wanted you to know that it's such a common thing, and I hope that you feel better soon.

[ginger1981 0]

As mentioned above, join a meetup group for Brit expats. The one here in Chicago is pretty active...they meet up once a month at varying local bars.

I wish you the best adjusting! Some people adapt better than others...don't be afraid to talk to someone...whether a professional or someone you feel like you could maybe connect with and trust. I think we Americans can be hard to get to know, but most are compassionate and would be willing to help you through this tough time.

[Mrs. BB 0]

Meet Up groups really are great. It's culture shock when you first get out here. And I'm counting the first couple years as first gettting out here. When you've spent your whole life living something different its a huge adjustment.

I recommend the meetup groups cause you get to meet 'veterans' so to speak, that have been through it. You also meet the newbies that just got here and you can help them as well because you know exactly how they are feeling. I know for my husband its been almost theraputic.

We get together for all the Australian holidays. We had Australia Day at our home. We had a great get together for Anzac Day.

Meeting up with some expats will be fun and you'll make some new friends. And when you start in on the inevitable "You Americans..." conversation it will make it just that much more satifying.