wife and I submitted paperwork, now we are separated...what to do? please help

[TBoneTX 43,020]

One overly strong post has been removed; wrongful advice supplied by one poster had already been corrected within the thread by other posters.

TBoneTX

VJ Moderation

[raven52 233]

Just my opinion, but one side of this story is pretty much true, and I think one side is not bringing all the truth to the table.

Something is wrong, with we do not want to divorce, but we do not want to live together, IF you live under the same roof, different bedrooms, and still working on problems, incl. counseling, which is great, then fine.

But living apart, and doing "your own thing" and trying to "work things out" just does not add up to me.

One of the two, has a different agenda, after the ROC is over.,.,..it is just my "gut feeling, hope all turns out well, and we hear you guys are a happy couple again!

[Jamnan_n_Steve 17]

Remind your wife to file her online change of address.

[Villanelle 4,121]

Hi, everyone.

I'm in a weird situation here and need some help. My wife filed for her removal of conditions back in December, and received notice back from USCIS.

However, in January, we had a HUGE falling out and she has moved out and gotten her own place. She and I still speak, and we are working to rebuild our relationship through counseling.

Here's the issue...I'm sure it won't be much longer until she gets her appointment for the interview. When she goes in, she obviously can't say she and I are still together, because we are currently separated. If she says that, she'd be lying...and surely they would find out.

We don't know what to do. We have considered filing for a divorce, and then entirely refiling for removal of conditions, but we don't want to just divorce each other for immigration purposed, only to remarry later after we have worked things out through counseling (hopefully).

Can anyone give any guidance on what to do? :/

There are many topics on this. There is also a USCIS memo regarding this issue. I can try to find it if you cant locate it in the forums.

First, you keep saying 'we' alot. Its cute, but its really her application.

Since she filed jointly if she gets an interview YOU BOTH HAVE TO ATTEND or she will be denied. So thats number one. Number 2, you are quite certain her interview will be coming up shortly. Are you psychic? Not a joke. Depending on where you are it can be a loooong wait. People in the CA area have been waiting for 2-3 YEARS now due to lets say...mmm other current immigration issues that have taken priority. Meanwhile other parts of the country are running smoothly and ROCs are getting processed in a timely fashion.

Your profile does not say where you are- so lets hope youre in a good location.

So going back- joint application- joint interview. You both attend. Its fine if you go and tell the truth that you are not having the best of time right now. As long as you have not LEGALLY separated (filed forms ie separation agreement) started divorce proceedings and YOU the USC are not withdrawing support of the joint application they can still approve it.

As other have said its based on a bonafide marriage- that means REAL marriage- not a happy marriage- a real marriage and real marriages have ups and downs.

If YOU the USC choose to not attend or to attend and withdraw support the the MRS will be forced over to a waiver filing where she will need to submit the divorce decree. The officer will give her the option in the interview (or should give her that option) if she would like to continue with the joint petition or switch to her own. If divorce is not happening then she shouldnt switch. If she switches she needs a final divorce decree to get approved. Depending on your state it can take a while to obtain that.

A lawyer can not do anything for you as they can not speak for you in the interview. They can only file forms. So until you know what forms you want to file (ie switching to a waiver because you are going to divorce) you dont need one. Even then you dont need one. Well you may need one to get divorced lol. But then it becomes her form, her solo interview.

Is all that clear?

[JCUSN 0]

There are many topics on this. There is also a USCIS memo regarding this issue. I can try to find it if you cant locate it in the forums.

First, you keep saying 'we' alot. Its cute, but its really her application.

Since she filed jointly if she gets an interview YOU BOTH HAVE TO ATTEND or she will be denied. So thats number one. Number 2, you are quite certain her interview will be coming up shortly. Are you psychic? Not a joke. Depending on where you are it can be a loooong wait. People in the CA area have been waiting for 2-3 YEARS now due to lets say...mmm other current immigration issues that have taken priority. Meanwhile other parts of the country are running smoothly and ROCs are getting processed in a timely fashion.

Your profile does not say where you are- so lets hope youre in a good location.

So going back- joint application- joint interview. You both attend. Its fine if you go and tell the truth that you are not having the best of time right now. As long as you have not LEGALLY separated (filed forms ie separation agreement) started divorce proceedings and YOU the USC are not withdrawing support of the joint application they can still approve it.

As other have said its based on a bonafide marriage- that means REAL marriage- not a happy marriage- a real marriage and real marriages have ups and downs.

If YOU the USC choose to not attend or to attend and withdraw support the the MRS will be forced over to a waiver filing where she will need to submit the divorce decree. The officer will give her the option in the interview (or should give her that option) if she would like to continue with the joint petition or switch to her own. If divorce is not happening then she shouldnt switch. If she switches she needs a final divorce decree to get approved. Depending on your state it can take a while to obtain that.

A lawyer can not do anything for you as they can not speak for you in the interview. They can only file forms. So until you know what forms you want to file (ie switching to a waiver because you are going to divorce) you dont need one. Even then you dont need one. Well you may need one to get divorced lol. But then it becomes her form, her solo interview.

Is all that clear?

Thank you for this reply, and thank you everyone else as well!

Just a quick question on this...so if we divorce, she does NOT have to withdraw her application and totally submit a new one and pay all the fees again? She only has to submit a waiver?

Also, I PM'd you in regards to which memo you are referencing from USCIS.

Thanks again!

Edited March 2, 2015 by JCUSN

[Villanelle 4,121]

Thank you for this reply, and thank you everyone else as well!

Just a quick question on this...so if we divorce, she does NOT have to withdraw her application and totally submit a new one and pay all the fees again? She only has to submit a waiver?

Also, I PM'd you in regards to which memo you are referencing from USCIS.

Thanks again!

I dont think youre getting it quite yet based on that question...

She filed. Paid her fee. The ball is now rolling. No ones using words like withdraw and pay again. We are talking - convert to a waiver on an application already paid for in progress. Its done quite often.

FYI there are tons of threads in this forum with similar titles. Your situation is not as unique as you think it is. Youll find different advice in each one because everyone is at different steps and the questions are being posed by different people. (immigrant/USC) Usually its not in the immigrants best interest to continue with a joint petition if the marriage is on the rocks and have the USC come to the interview because they can sabotage it. So many switch to waiver and divorce. Some dont. Only you and she truly know the status of the relationship- the level of trust and how close to divorce or reconciliation you are.

(dont take it too personally if she chooses a waiver and divorce to protect herself immigration wise. Something caused the breakdown and her moving out. She would be placing a huge amount of trust in you in letting you attend the joint interview)

So at this point she needs to just let the petition be. IF it gets approved- fine. You did nothing wrong.

IF an interview is scheduled a decision needs to be made. Are you going joint or is she switching and you guys are divorcing? She can notify them in the interview she will be switching to a waiver OR she can notify them NOW via a letter of her intent to switch if you file divorce papers. She can do this before an interview is scheduled.

OR if you choose you can write a letter withdrawing support from the joint application which will force them to convert her to a waiver filing.

Bottom line -There are no more fees. A 'waiver' is not an official form you can download- in this case its just a request in the form of a letter (if youre submitting it in writing, or a verbal statement in the interview statement under oath asking to change the tic box on the form you already submitted from joint petition to 'waiver petition'. Its not that complicated. Dont over think it.

Here is the memo. As usual with USCIS its wordy. If theres part you dont understand or how it applies to your specific scenario dont be afraid to post back. Encourage your wife to join the forums as well- as this effects her more then you.

http://www.uscis.gov/sites/default/files/USCIS/Laws/Memoranda/Static_Files_Memoranda/2009/i-751_Filed_%20Prior_Termination_3apr09.pdf

[JCUSN 0]

I dont think youre getting it quite yet based on that question...

She filed. Paid her fee. The ball is now rolling. No ones using words like withdraw and pay again. We are talking - convert to a waiver on an application already paid for in progress. Its done quite often.

FYI there are tons of threads in this forum with similar titles. Your situation is not as unique as you think it is. Youll find different advice in each one because everyone is at different steps and the questions are being posed by different people. (immigrant/USC) Usually its not in the immigrants best interest to continue with a joint petition if the marriage is on the rocks and have the USC come to the interview because they can sabotage it. So many switch to waiver and divorce. Some dont. Only you and she truly know the status of the relationship- the level of trust and how close to divorce or reconciliation you are.

(dont take it too personally if she chooses a waiver and divorce to protect herself immigration wise. Something caused the breakdown and her moving out. She would be placing a huge amount of trust in you in letting you attend the joint interview)

So at this point she needs to just let the petition be. IF it gets approved- fine. You did nothing wrong.

IF an interview is scheduled a decision needs to be made. Are you going joint or is she switching and you guys are divorcing? She can notify them in the interview she will be switching to a waiver OR she can notify them NOW via a letter of her intent to switch if you file divorce papers. She can do this before an interview is scheduled.

OR if you choose you can write a letter withdrawing support from the joint application which will force them to convert her to a waiver filing.

Bottom line -There are no more fees. A 'waiver' is not an official form you can download- in this case its just a request in the form of a letter (if youre submitting it in writing, or a verbal statement in the interview statement under oath asking to change the tic box on the form you already submitted from joint petition to 'waiver petition'. Its not that complicated. Dont over think it.

Here is the memo. As usual with USCIS its wordy. If theres part you dont understand or how it applies to your specific scenario dont be afraid to post back. Encourage your wife to join the forums as well- as this effects her more then you.

http://www.uscis.gov/sites/default/files/USCIS/Laws/Memoranda/Static_Files_Memoranda/2009/i-751_Filed_%20Prior_Termination_3apr09.pdf

This REALLY cleared everything up for me. Thank you SOOOOOO MUCH!