Religion at Center of Another Custody Battle

[The_Dude 1,142]

For the second time this year, religion is taking center stage in another custody battle being waged in Chicago's courts.

Laura Derbigney of Chicago has found herself in the middle of a custody battle between her Catholic husband and his Jewish ex-wife over how their 7-year-old son is cared for during paternal visits.

A court order restricts Laura Derbigney and her husband, Nelson, from driving the boy in a car, allowing him to use electronics or to be fed pork and other foods as outlined in Orthodox Judaism.

"I truly feel it's an intrustion on my home life," she said from her attorney's office Monday. "That I have to now obey certain aspects of being kosher and following Sabbath in order for my husband and I to see his son, is wrong."

The boy's biological mother also asked Derbigney that the boy's food be purchased at a certain grocery store, claiming the boy was fed non-kosher hot dogs during visits with his dad.

"I have to purchase certain products. I prefer minority-owned stores. I'm Hispanic and Catholic. I make enchiladas. Flautas. Now I'm being ridiculed for making food I grew up with," she explained. "I thought there was a differenct between church and state. Because she's a Hasidic jew, I have to live live as Hasidic jew too?"

Her attorney, Joel Brodsky, says the court is out of line. Brodsky, who earlier this year won a similar religious case, said the First Amendment right to live according to your own religious beliefs is being thrown out the door with the temporary restriction.

"Just because you're divorced, the court can't say how to live your lives or what grocery store you can go to," Brodsky said. "The next step is going to be a Muslim father with custody. During the next visitation, is the mother going to have to wear a burka? That's where we're heading. Divorce courts have to stop getting in the way of religion."

A gag order prevents the boy's biological mother and father from speaking to the media about the case.

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I've seen various reportings on this case today and all seem to have some sort of slant. It would seem to be that despite her claims, the new step-mom isn't being prevented from making the foods that she wants, or practicing her religion or culture. She is prevented from sharing it with her step-son. The real downside that I see to this whole situation is that the son is in essence prevented from sharing a lot of elements of his father and step-mother's lives.

[Nagishkaw 510]

the boy was fed non-kosher hot dogs during visits with his dad

.

:bonk: :bonk:

[The_Dude 1,142]

.

:bonk: :bonk:

The ex-wife claimed that, it wasn't proven.

[ValerieA 350]

I'm in a very watered-down version of the same situation. My husband's ex is Jewish (though not Orthodox), and raising their 2 children Jewish (of course). So, when they come over here, I have to make sure they eat kosher (whether they want to or not, a whole 'nother story sometimes). I had no experience with kosher, except having a rabbi coming and blessing the food processing plant once a year where I worked at. I have learned, because it is NOT my decision and really, it is a small concession overall.

[Jenn! 918]

She should have thought about this scenario before having children with him. She already made the committment to raising the child adhering to Orthodox Judaism, and divorce shouldn't change that. They probably would have had the same arguments if they were still married anyway.

Edited May 18, 2010 by Jenn!

[Usui Takumi 1,562]

Here is a crazy thought. Let the son decide? But apparently free will only magically appear later in life.

[Jenn! 918]

Here is a crazy thought. Let the son decide? But apparently free will only magically appear later in life.

Well, that's not really how organized religion works generally, is it? Do you think a 7-year old would choose to not use his electronics on Saturdays?

[Usui Takumi 1,562]

Well, that's not really how organized religion works generally, is it? Do you think a 7-year old would choose to not use his electronics on Saturdays?

80% of children would probably be glued to their PS3 all Saturday long.

Edited May 18, 2010 by Sousuke

[Peikko 1,575]

The ban on electronics is just on Saturdays? I would be pissed if it was a total ban, but one day? Sheesh, there are much better things to do with your kids on the weekend than play with computer games - as long as the kid is allowed to play that is.