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Tero

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Posts posted by Tero

  1. You people with fiances in places where internet is available should really consider yourselves lucky. Internet is rare and slow in Mongolia. We've skyped 5 times in the last 7 8 months, and it's usually grainy/skippy.

    I use voice.google.com to call her. It's 15 cents a minute. We talk twice a day for about 30 minuutes. So expensive...

    Well said!

    I sent a laptop with webcam to my wife and had to pay about $100 for internet every month(more expensive than my monthly pay over here). Yet, the connection was horribly slow and unstable ...really frustrating. I ended up giving up on it and just used rebtel to call. I spent over $900 dollars on phone calls to my wife last year. :help:

  2. I can see u r putting too much emphasis on deportation. Deportation dont just come after u call ICE. Before she get deported she have to appear infront of a judge who will listen her claim, which is VAWA. The VAWA claim is so strong that the judge does not just listen and say get deported. The VAWA claim is sent to some special immigration experts who check all her evidence about the claim and after they approve VAWA she gets greencard. If they do not approve her claim the judge then order deportation. Remember this process can take more than 3 yrs. We really dont know what additional prove she have other than police reports. She might be having a lot more prove than u may think because if police arrested u then, may be there was some evidence to that. Am not accusing u but remember VAWA victims are protected by immigrations. U can withdraw ur 1-130 petition(AOS), but still it will not affect her VAWA petition. They are two different petitions. If u go to info pass to withdraw ur petition which most REAL abusers always do it will not affect her VAWA petition, but it can make her VAWA petition even stronger. Just remember in VAWA terms u are the abuser and she is a victim of domestic violence. And abusers do anything to harm the victims. If u ever call to inquire about her VAWA petition they will never tell or talk to u. Hope u understand my explaination.

    I will urge u to concentrate on child custody case because u have some prove that can grant u full custody but she will still be granted some rights for her kid even if she is an illegal immigrant. Family court dont exempt a parent from her child life due to her immigration status. Remember if she can prove that u are an abuser the story may even change to worse.I dont see any mother giving up her kid that simple.

    In my opinion, there's no luck in annulment because you had a valid relationship at the time marriage.

    I wish u luck in ur decisions!!!

    Are there any steps taken to find out if the abuse claim is false? Like a lie detector test.

  3. I have not presented a legal argument. Such things do not concern me. You can work all your life for your wife, have no kids, and "someone can come and take her from you" Right? I am saying, ONLY, be the best father you can be, be the best husband you can be and never lose sleep over someone taking what you worked for. Build it solid and strong and no one can take it. Had someone tried to take my kids, THEY would have said..."Don't do this, DO NOT do this"

    I do not worry about someone taking what I worked for. There are too many others out there who are afraid to give 100%, what would I worry about?

    Limiting your commitment to "protect" what is yours is just the way to guarantee it is vulnerable to loss.

    That is a good philosophy to live by. But for the things I can control and avoid, I'd rather be safe than sorry! And of course, I will definitely earn that "you are the best Husband and Dad in the world" award from my wife and kids :)

  4. Sorry, but I have to question as to why he would believe anything someone at the Call Center would tell him.

    People claim the USCIS Call Center employees are 'stupid, mindless drones' and 'liars' when they are given information that the caller doesn't believe to be true... and then jump all over it, creating a ruckus, yelling and screaming "It's so unfair" as if they believe it.

    So which one is it? Is the information given at the Call Center accurate? Or not? One or the other. It's annoying to have people go back and forth on the Call Center being 'true' when they want to believe it (like this case), or 'false' when they don't want to believe it.

    People have indeed made others to believe the info they get from the call centers are NEVER true, which is not true. When you call you should try to speak with a Tier 2 rep. There is no doubt that sometimes they give wrong info, but that's only sometimes not all the times. Even the police can give you wrong info many times. Speaking with a tier 2 rep gives you a closer idea, which you can always weigh against the answers of some time-proven-credible elite members here.

  5. ...And I remember a case in the news in 2009. A USC man divorced his Brazilian wife who took their son back to Brazil and got remarried. Years after, she passed away while the son had already been adopted, loved and cared for by her step father and family. All was well until the USC went back to claim the boy ....what an emotional battle for the whole Brazilian family when the court gave the child back to his biological dad.

    Gary, thank God no one claimed your adopted kids, does not mean it does not happen to some others, does not mean it's not a valid concern for a relatively younger person.

  6. Yes, because I am quite advanced in age and no one took away my children. You care for your family, you make them number 1 and you sleep well each night. Absolutely true.

    I have no "women", they are all sons. One is age 15 which I guess is a "man" ???. But he will be 16 in a week. I am still not worried.

    All the same, you get my point. Your sons are all grown and no claiming is needed as they now take care of themselves, besides your youngest. All I am saying is that, for most people, the older you get, the less concerned/worried you are about certain things. There is no imposing of will in this matter. I want a boy first you want a girl first, I want 2 kids you want 4, none of us is wrong...just a preference.

  7. Hello All,

    I have seen most of the posts but not all due to a time I can spend here.

    In my first marriage – German lady nine years older than me she could not have kids and had her tubes tied before we met as she had sworn off serious relationships due a bad one.

    We discussed it and decided if we wanted them later after the military there were way to have and raise them one being adoption. I found out later in the marriage that kids were never really a consideration in her life. At the time of this revelation all necessary factors I needed to stay married were still present. I became a Big Brother for the organization of Big Brothers Big Sisters. I became a scout master for an area Boy Scout Troop that needed help. She was supportive of these activities in the beginning of them but after a year became I believe jealous of the time away these required. We divorced after 12 years we just grew apart since I was gone 2 weeks home 2 weeks.

    I married a Yankee from Indiana I met on the internet. I knew she had one 12 year old daughter. I am from Louisiana by the way. Shortly after the marriage I saw where the daughter was being spoon feed and given her every wish. She was not required to pick up behind herself, she could leave her clothes in the bathroom floor and her room my god was like a tornado daily. Mom would take care of this and whine about it to me. So one day I started picking up the clothes and putting them in a trash bag and in my truck. I cleaned the room daily before the wife returned home. When the daughter came home with the next honor roll and wanted her money for the good grades. I gave her the bag of clothes I had collected, and a bill for cleaning her room. She ended up with half of what she would have normally gotten for the grades. Her mother hit the roof and said that was her daughter not mine, she was of her blood not mine. I did not even raise my voice I began packing her a suitcase and recommended she go pack one for Adriane. Wow the hollering at me stopped and the tune she was spouting changed. What do you mean I said if she is yours and not ours then I guess you both are leaving so I will help you go back where you were before and the two of you can live alone together and make all the messes you want? It is not your job to do everything for her. If she messes up telling her it is ok and alright each time teaches her nothing. I said I have been up here with you for a year and I have seen how she rules you and this house.

    So over the next several years there were several hard lessons she had to learn and I received the same grief each time, but the daughter just graduated from Purdue with a 4.0 from beginning to end and told me she would not have done that if I had not raised her the way I did. Now once I and her mother divorced then of course I was not worth talking to I left the family. I was given a choice between my 13 year career and her and working some where else for far less. She was not willing to move where I could get a better job and be home every night. She wanted to have her cake, her icing and her place to eat it. So this let me know where I ranked. The daughter had graduated so in her eyes I think she was a point where she could play poker and deal with a win or a loss.

    My Rina has three boys, 19,16,8 now but we have accepted each other as a family from day one. When they get to the states I will adopt the 8 year old as his father is useless and it would be beneficial the other two can have my name if wish. The 16 will be 18 before the process could be completed.

    I love them all very much and consider them just as much mine as hers so together they are ours in all aspects. They are ready to come to Dallas and experience life here. I do worry about providing for such a big family but I am ready to face the challenge together.

    I had my plumbing repaired so we can try to make one between us as I have none of my own blood.

    I look forward to all that is ahead by merely relying on the love and devotion we all share.

    I have never received the first bit of bad attitude or back talk from our ki8ds and this was amazing but a big plus for me. They are always respectful of everyone. They do as you ask without why? When? How come?

    I love my family and would not trade what I have for all the gold in the world.

    We will make it.

    Sorry to ramble.

    Now, your case is one of the points I've been trying to make. It is a whole lot easier when the step kid(s) behave ...and even your wife. See how easier/happier you are now with your respectful kids than the previous. How crushing was it when your ex told you her daughter was hers and not yours? That's what I never want to hear.

  8. I am not concerned about such. I taught the boys to drive, fish, shoot, ski, swim, sled, kayak, snowboard, ride bikes, ride horses, built fences, airplanes, real airplanes, and take them really flying in planes they helped build, did ceramic tile in the bathroom, cabinets in the kitchen, built out a room above the garage for them to hang out with their friends. We jumped off cliffs into streams together. We started a car business together and we buy old cars, work on them together and then sell them. Anfd taught them to do the books and the tax returns for having their own business! Our youngest son has saved enough to buy himself a nice car CASH next month when he gets a driver's lisence. I was there when they were sick, they were there when I was sick.

    You think I am worried about someone "showing up tomorrow" and claiming something from me? :rofl: You are too funny.

    Lookie here, these kids are OURS. NO ONE is going to convince them otherwise. Be a good DAD and you sleep well (as soon as Alla finishes her homework... :whistle: )

    no one takes anything from a man that enjoys his kids and makes them number 1

    I know your list goes on. You might not worry about anyone else claiming them since they're all men and women already, and you are quite advanced in age. But a relatively younger guy like me have more of that as a concern. Like I said before, it is a psychological thing and personal preference.

    And you know the statement in bold above is not absolutely true right?

  9. Consuming dairy products causes an inflammation process within the body to include the lungs. The human body produces enough mucous to coat any internal surface to protect it from further damage. Mucous coating the linings of the lungs would certainly aid in camouflaging any scarring within the lung. Talk to any dietician and they will say the same thing. Dairy products produce lots of acid which then destroys tissue. Mucous is mother natures way of protecting you from these destructive properties.

    Nerd Alert!!! :lol:

  10. I agree with the others that coming back at the same time to be with her is not required. I will point out though in some cultures, woman look very favorably upon a man that is willing to see her through such a processes. Coming to another country for good is a very stressful thing, and having the man there sends a strong message that you will be there beside her to take care of her in the marriage.

    That's true. If the finances are readily available, by all means! The finances can be used for something more productive down the road to benefit the relationship than mere emotional impression. Traveling with the spouse is not the only chance you get to make a good impression you know :) .

  11. I am just saying there is an alternative available and unless you try it, you really do not know what you are missing!! The fear of the unknown would scare most grown men. One of the major practical reasons I chose a lady with kids is because she is going to be so damn busy with the kids that she won't have the energy or time to take care of the guy next door. Think about that for a moment!!

    What is there to miss in adopting someone else's kids when you can make your own? :blink:

    And your reason for picking that is flawed, in that an unfaithful spouse would be unfaithful regardless of number of kids. Besides, that is not the reason you married her as you only discovered her kids after a while into your marriage (talking about the other one).

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