tany1157

I agree with MIBEN and bahisgirl. It's a difficult balance between being confidently prepared and crazy nervous because Casa is so tough these days.

Here is what else I can think of that hasn't been said. --

Tell your fiance to talk to the CO as if he is someone in his family - don't be too nervous, be conversational, and confident, don't be bashful about providing personal information, and let his personality come through.

The other thing is if he doesn't know an answer to a question for whatever reason - admit that he doesn't know - but provide other information about the subject that he does know. Ex - If they ask about where a certain family member lives (let's say a cousin, just for example) and your husband doesn't know - he should say, "I don't know; we don't talk about that cousin much, but I know they only see each other at holidays". Something along those lines that shows even if he doesn't know the answer to the question that they're asking, he does know something about the topic.

I think that helps. Good Luck.

I think this advice pretty much sums it up....and even if you DO do all this, it won't guarantee an approval. Sometimes the consulate just doesn't believe the relationship...period. Also, I have found that most of the CO's have made a decision on the outcome before they even see the beneficiary. I will be praying for you OP!

That's not reasonable advide for the Casa consulate.

Seriously....this is why I think she should be asking this question in MENA....otherwise, you get the wrong advice. Legit couples get denied everyday in MENA, so please, don't give advice unless you know about the consulate the OP is going through.

ok,im feeling a lot of greatness for all of your post,I'll try to explain better:

- we dont have large age difference just 7 years

- my fiance is not a very young man , he has 43 and I 50

- he finished his studies in an university

- he is owner of a business

- he hasn't a poor family,neither rich,but yes of middle class

- I know in know the whole family in person, I spent a very good days with all of them

- HERE IS A LITTLE PROBLEM: I WENT THERE JUST ONE TIME,BUT I HAVE MY OWN REASONS AND I CAN PROVE THAT,FROM 2007 MY DAUGHTER BECAME SICK AND BEEN IN VERY DELICATE SITUATION WITH HER HEALTH, I DONT HAVE THE RIGHT TO PUBLIC HERE THE EXACT ILLINESS SHE HAD,SO,WHEN MY FIANCE HAS HIS INTERVIEW THE CO ASKED HIM WHY I WENT ONLY ONE TIME THERE,AND HE ASKED,BECAUSE SHE HAD TO CARE HER SICK DAUGHTER AND TOLD HER ABOUT THE ILLNESS THAT MY DAUGHTER HAD,THE CO ASKED HIM: WHAT KIND OF MEDICINE DOES HER DAUGHTER TAKE,HE SAID,I DONT KNOW,AND THE CO ASKED SEVERAL TIMES THE SAME THING ABOUT THE MEDICINE.

The Privacy Rule protects the privacy of your health information; it says who can look at and receive your health information, and also gives you specific rights over that information. In addition, the Patient Safety Act and Rule establish a voluntary reporting system to enhance the data available to assess and resolve patient safety and health care quality issues and provides confidentiality protections for patient safety concerns.

SO,WHO HAVE THE RIGHT IN THIS WORLD TO INQUIRE ABOUT MY DAUGHTER HEALTH? JUST HER CAN TALK ABOUT THAT, I THINK SOMETIMES THE CO CROSS THE LIMITS :( :(

Unfortunately, they ask what they wish to ask. Your fiance not knowing what medicine your gravely ill daughter is taking was probably a big red flag to them, because that is something an SO should know about the immediate family. I'm sorry, you are going through this, it sounds like they just didn't believe the relationship was valid, only for immigration purposes.

any of you guys have had some experience in your k1 process when your boyfriend have been denied in interviews in Casablanca and some of you have used the help of state senator, how were the results?, this has favored your processes? Please I need information and I'll be thankful of read about your stories

I'm sorry about your denial. It is quite common in Casa. I have had my senator on our case since our first denial. They can't do much, but mine made inquiries regularly. I have heard of others being more aggressive. It is certainly worth a try!

Congrats for a swift journey!

Morocco does not give visa the same day, NEVER buy ticket until you have the visa in hand. This will NOT be easier because it's your second time, or because you'remarried. Be prepared. Good luck!

Enjoy it!!

Such wonderful news that he has his visa.

You have been such a great example throughout this process of how to get things done, and turned around in your favor. And, you've done it with a lot of grace and class - no whining or blaming others. Truly, a great example of how to get it done!

Wishing you guys all the best in his journey here and the adjustment and transition period!

Thank you! I didn't let immigration run my life, it wasn't easy, but you can't let it run your life. Otherwise, it will destroy you. I can't wait for what's next!

What an amazing story of a positive outlook and of love. Two denials and 3 years WOW. I pray you write a book or screenplay. God Bless you and your family. Oh your son what a joyous day this will be.

HAHAHA, my husband keeps telling me I should write a book about it...we will see

Congrats Tany. I have tears in my eyes remembering your journey. I am so happy for this ending and a new beggining

My process was easy and I am very thankful and very blessed. but I was still crazy throughout the whole thing! lol

You may be on cloud 9 right now just knowing he has his visa.... the the true floating feeling is when you see him walk through that door onto american soil and into your arms. The feeling of no more computer or emails or texts or visits or 20 hour flight.... knowing he will always be next to you when you need a hug or just to hold your hand... this is an amazing feeling... I will never forget how blessed we were and we are forever grateful to all the people of VJ who helped us make it through cairo embassy.

Enjoy your life, your love and your future.

Praise God!

Micki

You made me cry

Picking up visa on Monday!

No matter the expiration as a holder of a green card she can't be out of the US more than a year so she'll have to plan a yearly trip back to the US not to lose her status. Perhaps time to become an US citizen? (of course she can always decide to come back as a tourist to visit a kids, grandkids, etc.)

Thank you for your help also!

Thank you so much for your understanding and support. I am afraid that your assessment of the situation is quite accurate. I am hoping beyond hope that this transition will be as trouble free as possible, but am prepared for the worst. I just feel bad for my poor child being caught in the middle of this mess. I wish my ex would see how this type of behavior does nothing but hurt our child.

**********

A big thank you to everyone for your feedback, it was helpful to hear all different opinions and experiences to get a good idea of how to proceed with this very difficult situation.

I wish you good luck, and will keep your family in my prayers

awwww Congrats!!

Wow, so happy to hear that! Congratulations!

So his interview was more like 20-25 minutes. I misunderstood him earlier...

....our visa journey that is....Approved!

Hmmm.... maybe you can somehow get your ex to talk with your current spouse? I don't know, I think if you just tell her something like "I deserve to be happy", you're going to feed her paranoia about your new spouse and that you don't care about the kids enough. I don't know if your kids have met your new spouse but maybe she should somehow communicate with your new spouse before the kids do (you being present to avoid your ex somehow attacking verbally or physically your new spouse).

I'm not insinuating foreign spouses are somehow more evil. I'm saying that his ex probably see is as a person from a different culture, who maybe he hasn't known "in person" for a long time, and that's why she's reacting so badly to this.

I'm immigrating a Muslim. My ex could scream up and down I'm importing some evil person, the way the media likes to put it. But you know why he isn't...because we trust each other that we have the best intentions for our son. He has an open mind, and he wants me to be happy. I feel the same exact way for him. Of course I prod about his woman, because I'm nosy. And I let him know things that are going on with my husband. I'm sure if we had a bitter, sour relationship, things would be way different. I agree that just telling the ex what they want to know will just be easier. Your advice is good as well. After all that, if the ex is still being a jerk, then they are just being troublemakers. Didn't mean to disrespect anyone, this subject just pushed my buttons. OP, someone stated maybe being the bigger person, and killing them with kindness. You should do just that. Being defensive will only feed the ex's fire. Good luck

Any new about your husband..

He just went in guys, I'm about to toss my cookies...

THANKS i also hope so

and best of luck to u too

<3

Thank you

Plenty of times couples get the visa, etc, come to the US, then the beneficiary's true colors start showing, hey, read the "Effects of Major Family Changes on Immigration Benefits" forum to see just a few posts about it. Ill-intentioned people can and do scam the USC and the US government in the process.

Your ex is probably being more paranoid because maybe the country your spouse is from has certain negative stereotypes about its people, or she's heard horror stories, etc. I'm sure she'll get over it once she comes to the States and all goes well.

I understand this, but this can happen in your own country. There are many, many people who get used/ scammed right here in America. I know there are horror stories of foreign relationships gone awry, but just as many happen right here. In this case, the ex is being a controlling bully, because they didn't supply this person with whom they were moving into the house. Maybe the OP didn't ask, but now they should. I know people married for 20 years who ended up being duped because their spouse decided to cheat, or they were living a double life. This isn't just about immigrants. Please stop insinuating that it is. These people go through extensive background checks. If they come here, and it ends up being a scam, then it's a life lesson that some people are just liars, and will hurt whomever, just for their own selfish reasons. If you think this doesn't happen amongst your fellow Americans, then you have your head in the clouds.

I don't know for sure, but this looks very good! I am hoping it is what we think it is, because it sounds like it

Thank you for being understanding about how stressful this is for me. Another sleepless night over this... I really envy you the relationship you have with your ex and his new significant other.

I have explained that my fiance has gone through extensive background checks over the course of the visa process. I brought up how I respected his ability to choose a person who would not endanger our child and would like the same respect in return. My child was told that my fiancee coming here: "Sounds like the beginning of a horror movie." by my ex. The is the level of mentality that I am dealing with here.

You mentioned that immigration can't find everything. That is true. Nor could any investigation my ex could do. Neither could a meeting between my ex and my fiance. My ex's demands are completely pointless. The ex has to trust me as a parent to put my child's well-being and safety first. I have given my ex no reason in the past not to trust in my abilities as a parent. Even though we do not see eye to eye on most things, I know the ex loves our child and would not put our child in danger. Neither would I. That is my whole point.

It takes maturity on both parts. It was ugly the first year after separation, but we both said we didn't want that for our son. It takes work. We fight, maybe 3-4 times a year. We both know neither of us would put anyone or anything above our son. No, it isn't always easy, but we have managed. Divorced/separated parents need to love their child more than they hate each other. And I'm sorry, but even if you have been living years with someone, doesn't always guarantee you really "know" them...just watch "who the bleep did I marry"... or ask anyone who found out their spouse molested their child. So the fact that you are importing someone should not make a difference, and I am truly sorry your ex is being this way.

My current husband respects the fact my son's father is in his life. It was one of the first things I told him when we met, that this was how it was, and he needed to accept that. I tell my husband that we are lucky, because my ex could make a big thing how I was "importing a Muslim that I met on the internet", and how I could possibly be endangering my son. But thankfully, the people who know me, know I'm not one to be taken advantage of. I'm pretty opinionated and have a big mouth. In the end, he is still the ex, so beyond my son, my husband doesn't want to hear much else about him

I'm sorry, I've been speaking to you like you are the man, but I'm sensing your the woman My apologies

Yes, I trusted the ex's judgement. Didn't think I had a choice. And it certainly wasn't apathy. Unless there was some reason for actual concern, outside of my feeling insulted for not even being informed of any of this or even introduced to this person who just started showing up one day at parent-teacher conferences, I did not see a reason to interfere as I would want the same respect if tables were turned. My child did not voice any concerns about this new person at the time, so I let things go for the sake of peace. And yes, it is very unfortunate that we don't have the kind of relationship where we could just communicate more openly and introduce the new spouse in a friendly way.

My point is, they will not find anything that the government has not and meeting someone once isn't going to reveal their character. It is to appease the person, not to truly accomplish anything.

I feel extremely disrespected in every way by my ex and this is just another incidence of power play and manipulation due to their insecurity. (I believe this particular insecurity is fueled by fear of a foreigner, because I was not questioned about a previous live-in significant other who was from the US.) My ex makes many derogatory comments about me and my family to my child. Constantly lays guilt trips on the child if they show affection for anyone but them and my child's relationship is now strained with the above mentioned step parent who moved in several years ago. My child doesn't want me to say anything to the other parent because they don't want things to get more uncomfortable than they already are. We tried a couple of years ago and nothing improved.

There is a lot more to this situation than just the issue of wanting to investigate my fiance (there always is). How do you keep the peace and cooperate for the child's sake without constantly cowering and giving in to a bully? This is just one more slap in the face after years of disrespect on the part of my ex.

I'm so sorry you are going through this. Having a pain in the neck ex is draining. Of course, I would demand to know who is around my son, as does his father. Thankfully, his father and I have a very good relationship. I speak openly about my current husband, and let him know what's is going on. I, in turn, have met the two women he has been serious with. He met a woman a couple of years ago, and married her quickly. AFTER they got married, he told me the crazy things she was doing, and needless to say, the marriage lasted maybe 2 months. He recently has been dating another woman. She came to my son's birthday in February, and I just loved her. She has always told my ex to ask me certain things, like when he wanted to change jobs, her first thing was he should speak with me, as it may have changed the child support I was getting. She wanted to make sure I was ok with her coming to my son's party. I get so angry at parents who make each other's lives more difficult, which in turn affects the children.

I would agree that both parents have a right to know who is around the children. But if she didn't care about the American you moved in, but now wants to jump up and down about the foreigner, is just showing her ignorance. Yes, immigration can't find everything, like if the person has pedophile tendencies, but hasn't acted upon them yet, or is a physically/emotionally abusive person. She should care who is around her kid regardless of where they come from.

Have you explained the immigration process to her? Does she know what it entails? Have you brought up how she moved people in without your say, and about the other woman you had living with you before, and how she didn't question it? I hope she isn't a thorn on your side during immigration, because the process alone is daunting, and stressful.

I'm keeping you guys in my prayers....fingers crossed for an approval!