tany1157

No debate, just wondering because I really thought petite referred to height or maybe just in the clothing world? And would this really be the most ridiculous thing ever to be debated in MENA?

you're right, petite is height, but even if I was 5 feet, I still wouldn't consider myself petite because of my curves! (just my personal choice, even if it isn't the mainstream thought!)

Your'e a trooper going there with the weight....hahaha I was contemplating on my 5.7 height not being model tall and embarrassed not to post it...

he is taller but I cant remember it in cm right now.

I do know he has a thing of being proud to lift me and does it more often because.... It bugs me, I am not dainty in body weight .

Tany you are so petite!!!

Petite?! thank you darling, but that's my mom at 5'0" ( my dad is 6'3"). I have wayyyy to many curves and way too much butt to be petite Thank god my husband's into that

I'm 5'5 ( I felt like a monster amongst all the short women in his family) and he is 6'2

Loving my husband doesn't mean I lose my identity. If that is what anyone thinks, then they don't know one ounce of who I am. And I'm not surprised someone has tried to derail the positive flow

I describe myself (and many others that know me) as a realist, with a positive outlook, and am overall very happy with life. In general, why does it seem when people have a positive outlook, they are looked upon as naive? I'm not considered a naive person, and know the challenges that are ahead for my marriage. I will be honest, I am filled with more anxiety about his arrival than happiness right now, but I know, when I see him at the airport, I will realize he is the same man that I've been in love with for almost 4 years. I personally think my husband will adjust well, but you never know. Maybe this is why my marriage is loved and accepted by all who know me...because they know my opinionated, in-your-face personality probably wouldn't sit well with a manipulating scammer out to screw me over, and that my husband loves these traits, as they make me who I am.

My husband doesn't smoke, drink, and is a practicing Muslim. He has been the breadwinner for his family since he was 21, and has been the "dad" ever since, because of his father's ailing health, and then his death almost 2 years ago. His respect for women is exceptional, and the way he treats me, his mom, grand mom, my mother and sisters is amazing. He is respected in his community, and is very hard working. He had been using our long immigration wait to further his studies, and has a list of what he wants to accomplish when he first gets here, and in our future. We look forward to building our life together, and having children. I know things may not all go as planned, but one thing I know about my husband, is that he is a man of his word. We have a great respect for each other, and I know he will continue to be a good husband and man once he gets here. Can you imagine, with his one job, he can support his family of 5, and live comfortably in Morocco. Here, at minimum, we will both have to work just to be able to support 3, never mind the extra amenities. He owns a house with a business underneath. I know my life would have been a bit more comfortable if I was able to move there with him, it just wasn't an option. I know of a few couples who don't post here anymore, that have had their husbands here over 2 years, and things are still going well. Maybe that is not long enough to call a success story, but I'm thinking they are on their way.

In the end, we all have a life to live, and we all learn from our mistakes, and try to make the best choices with what we know. Everyone here started at the same starting line, just at different times. I think that some forget that. I hope to never forget how it felt to be the newbie, and not knowing a thing about immigration, and how it felt to be denied, twice, and the feeling that just maybe, I would never be able to live with my husband in America. Yes, people get on each other's nerves, that is life. You won't get along with everyone. I also think that things get taken the wrong way a lot more often on message boards than they would in person. In the end, even though things get catty sometimes, most of the women here have great advice. I may not like someone, but if they make a good point, I'm with them.

On a side note, my husband is a very private person. He believes in the evil eye. Some people, for no reason, may just not like you, and will wish you harm or bad luck. I remember people telling me that my husband probably had a life I didn't know about, or some other secrets and that was why we got denied twice. In the end, it was just the fact that we moved fast, and they couldn't believe there was true love there. We proved them wrong. In all that time, we just grew stronger, and I love him more now than I ever did. As they say, the visa process is a piece of cake compared to the adjustment phase....if this is true for everyone, then I guess we are in for hell on earth

I also wonder about Morocco4ever, and Kiyah...they both helped me immensely after our first denial. I hope they are doing well

I started reading, mostly lurking, VJ around 2009-2010, when a lot of the 04-08 ladies were still posting. I read a ton of the archives, too. Most of y'all don't know me at all, but I hope the people this thread is directed to are all doing well. By posting in this forum, you've informed and at times entertained me and in some ways I feel like I shared your journeys a bit. Um, not in a stalker way. But aww, shucks, it's like watching an all-star reunion here!

I feel the same as you...I came in mid 09, and although the guides were good, how I really learned about immigration was reading all of what these ladies had to say in MENA. And boy, how naive I was back then to the process, and the politics of MENA. I always appreciate honest, straight forward answers. I am also glad that even after the visas are issued, that people still hang around, because immigration is more than just getting the visa, it is the whole life after. I have yet to endure that part of the process, but have gotten some great advice from others way ahead of me. I, too, have also met some wonderful people here, and can't see myself going too far, as I want to pay it forward now with others going through this process.

I know this is going to come off rude but it's not meant that way. What do you mean by happy ending? Like together until death? Or together for a few years and happy but the actual ending is uncertain? I don't think anyone has been around long enough to determine a true happy ending. Or are we talking about fairytale happy endings in which the king and princess (or pharaoh and princess)get married and ride off into the sunset and we really don't know how it ends up?

You make a valid point....happy "ending" seems a bit over the top. But I'm sure she wanted to hear from people a few years after immigration, and are still fairly happy. Of course, that is just my understanding, I could be totally wrong

I wasn't saying Americans exclusively, I was using as an example, because well, I'm from America, and know what I've seen, against parents who were from a different culture. Also seen my mil stick with a difficult man because divorce is not an option to her either. he has passed now, and she will never remarry.

Ok, I'll bite. What is a MENA country?

Stands for middle east/ north Africa. They are high fraud countries

How about a little humorous sarcasm? I was completely kidding Tany. Bu if OP finds a legal way I'm in.

Hahahahahaha I'm sorry lady I did realize afterwards that you couldn't be THAT naive. Its hard to read sarcasm, so much easier hearing it...So my apologies for being thick this evening

Have you tried to get one? did it not work?

I personally have not tried, but have found out over the years, that a visitor visa from a MENA country is very, very hard to get. There must be super strong ties to the home country, (job, property, lots of money etc) so that the consulate is certain the one looking for a tourist visa will return to their country. Morocco is a high fraud country. A man looking for a tourist visa when he is married to an American shows the consulate that they have more reason to stay in the US, than to return back to their home country. This is why it is practically impossible for someone with an American spouse to get a visitor visa to America. Here are some other links to your question, and that I am not just trying to burst your bubble.

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/344514-tourist-visa-for-morocco/

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/279243-send-an-invitation-to-my-husband/

Also, if you ask this in the MENA forum, you will get realistic answers from others with experience in MENA

A positive outlook is great, as you need one to get through immigration. Being realistic is another thing. Getting a visitor's visa for a young Moroccan man with an American wife is impossible. It's a fact, not an opinion. You could still try, but you will just lose your monies

I guess my next question would be, is it possible for him to come on a visitor visa for a while? It's not really possible for me to take time off from work to go visit him, but it's possible for him to visit me? is it even likely that he will get approved?

Visitor's visa from Morocco is very difficult to get. With an American wife...impossible.

He tells me his dreams about our future together

He finds pictures of what it might look like and sends them to me

He Skypes/messages/texts/emails me every day

When we are together, he holds my hand everywhere we go

He kisses me in public places

He treats me to meals in restaraunts that serve his authentic home cuisine, and teaches me how to cook them when we get home

He holds me every chance he gets

He buys me products and things I need without my asking for them

He keeps our room clean when I'm too busy to help out

Massages

For Valentines Day he took me out to a SKYPE Candlelight Dinner. Oh yes.

He loves me. Plain and simple.

He keeps my hopes up when things look hopeless.

He makes me laugh when it seems there is nothing to laugh about.

He loves me. Always.

How can I not love him!?

PLEASE TELL ME - Is it alright to sound romantic and totally in love in my Declaration of Meeting document? I want the feds to know I love him and want him safe in the country, but I don't want to sound so romantic they won't believe me. I want to sound professional, but not so professional that they won't believe me either.

You may get more help on your declaration page if you start your own thread about it, instead of posting in a 4 year old thread

Boarder control has the final say in who comes into this country, and they can and do interview anyone they wish. They check the paperwork for things that USCIS or DOS may have missed that would make you inadmissible.

They no longer allow that. You will need to send your I-130 cr1 spousal petition to the states.

What you can do is

1 - continue to get to know your new friend, find out about his life - does he have work prospects, does he look for work, does he work? How does he spend his time?

2- Get to know more about his family.

3- Enjoy your life, and do things to improve the quality and happiness of your life - you sound very lonely, and sound as though you feel like meeting him will be great for your life. Relationships work best when both people are happy going into the relationship.

4 - Read the DOS warning, and ask yourself if anything in your relationship sounds like that.

5 - Ask him if any of his friends are in relationships with American or European women.

6 - Ask him what he thinks life is like in America.

7 - Ask him how many other women he's met online, and how long the relationships with them lasted, and why they ended.

Those are a few things I can think of off the top of my head.

Anyone else?

I can't stress how important this one is for ANY relationship. This is why I said your man should enhance your life, not be all,and end all to your life. You have to know who you are, what you want, and be happy. If you look to a relationship to help you feel better about yourself, or your loneliness, than nevermind all the immigration stuff, that in itself spells disaster. You said you have a child? I hope that child is thought of before any of your own feelings, as you are proposing to bring a man in your house that you have only known for a few short months. My husband knew from day one, that A) my son comes before anyone and B) that I have a good relationship with my son's dad, and it will stay that way. I was pretty satisfied with my life when I met my husband. I work in a career that I love, and am very involved with my son, volunteering in his school and such. I have a failed marriage, and it failed in part because I got married young, and because I thought I needed someone in my life to be happy. I was so wrong. I needed to be content with myself before I could really be in a successful relationship. Relationships are difficult, and need more than just love to succeed. Add cultural/religious differences into the mix, and you have yourself quite a challenge. I fell in love with my husband early, but we thank God for what we just went through, as we know each other so much more than we did the first year together. There is a lot of compromise on both parts, and hard work to make it work. If it is real love, it will withstand the time apart.

oh maaaaaaaan....i just wanna be with him...

i've seen ppl getting married here for less..i mean i know its not making any sens..but i love him...is there any way we can get through this...maybe we will not get married and then when i come back ..just file a fiancee visa??hows that sound??

This is a much better plan than marriage, although even then, it won't guarantee an approval. Who has gotten married faster than 4 months after meeting???

If you really love him....wait. Marrying someone from a foreign country is not the same as marrying someone stateside. You both are still in the infatuation period. Seriously, my husband and I moved fast, but not that fast.

Oh I just read what you wrote on your page that y'all met online in January? So met 3 months ago and ready to marry on first trip?

January?! Slow down girl. How are you supposed to see if you guys have any kind of bond while running around, doing paperwork?? because that is all you will be doing for a few weeks. Hardly an ideal way to see if you even want to marry this guy. You really should not get married now, you should take that time to spend together. Seriously

thank u guys, we've been talking for less than a year

we got engaged in less than a year, and it caused problems.

you say you don't have a lot of money, this process is expensive. Are you able to support him while he is here? That will be a requirement. You can also have a co sponsor if you don't make enough money. But keep that in mind. And usually, one visit will not cut it with Casa.