
tany1157
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Posts posted by tany1157
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If you are serious about your fiance, please take this advice. Take it SLOW! I know you don't want to hear that, but it's the best. Get a few visits in before applying. and TELL YOUR FAMILY! You can overcome the age difference, if you play your cards right. Immigration will teach you patience. There is no quick way around it. Nobody wants to wait long to be with their loved ones, but we all have to wait, and wait....
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Age is a big red flag for Casa, but the family not knowing....that is a different story. Why would you get engaged to a woman and not tell your family? She didn't meet any of your family on your trip? Yes Jackie, the whole family could be in on the scam, but the family not knowing about her at all
that is a HUGE red flag. I would do some extensive searching on this web site about Casa, and other couples going through Casa. How long have you known her? How soon after you met did she fly to see you? Where did you meet? Is she divorced? Does she have kids? This next statement is just my opinion....I know some older woman like younger men. I could see myself dating a 30 year old if I was 40 or 45. I am only 30 now, and would never date a 20 year old boy, because in my experience, 20 year old don't know what they want in life for the long term. Just my honest opinion
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Yeah, I agree however, I do not get worked up about legit couples struggling with planning with K-1 versus CR-1, planning marriages when they haven't done the research. The OP did not know any different up until this thread presumably with many of the points of concern raised. She now has a different point of view, her plans just got all jacked up, I am not mad at her, she will have to deal with it.
The "get around" immigration I can't stand is the millions of people that enter the country illegally and will most likely get legal status eventually with a sweeping act of Congress and signature from the President. These same millions whom many do not pay into the tax system and many are public charges. I can't stand that, especially after this cumbersome process they put legal immigrants through.
Completely agree with the bolded....about the OP, I stand by what I said. Her attitude with her "ways of reasoning" were enough to set me off. She has been on this forum for a bit over a year, according to her profile, and I'm pretty sure she knew enough about the K1, (enough, not all) but decided anyways that she would still plan her wedding like she wasn't going through immigration. THEN, trying to find a way to speed up the process because she feels she shouldn't have to wait like the rest of us. Real couple or not, THAT is what annoys me...
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Well if he just said that (you would suck as a mom) then she wouldn't have come here to talk about it (I would hope). Actually I'm not even sure why she shared what she shared. But now that she did share it, we're all going to talk about it.
I think a comment I made around page 7 or 8 inspired it. I would not compromise the child thing, but that is just me. I do see the point that everyone is making. Even though I do agree with most of the points, I still have a hard time "jumping on the bandwagon" because I don't really know much else about them. I know they have been together a long time. Is it possible he has been just using her this whole time? I don't know. I know she made this public, and probably kicking herself now, but I do think everyone has gotten their point across. What she does with the info is her business. I just hope that whatever she decides to do, she doesn't do anything that will make her look back 30 years from now with regret.
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OP, you certainly have the cart before the horse. You need to do quite a bit of reading here on Visa Journey, starting with the K1 flowchart. It takes quite a lot longer than 6 months from application to Visa. Some people get lucky and get through the system faster, but they are the exception rather than the rule. Some people get sent requests for further information. That causes a delay. Some people who file petitions never successfully get Visas at all.
I'm sorry that you went ahead and planned your entire wedding, and made deposits, and invited people who paid for plane tickets to attend, but please understand USCIS will be unmoved by this. Poor planning on your behalf will not generate an emergency on theirs.
You cannot get around the process through perceived shortcuts, or hurry it up. You need to send your petition to the location they ask all K1's to be sent to. There is no short line, overnighting it only gets it to USCIS sooner, but once it is there, you will get into the line with everyone else.
You have not filed, so no. Contacting your congressman to hurry the process is of no use to you whatever. Even if you had been waiting beyond the projected time frame, calling on their help is of dubious assistance at best. They can call and inquire, but they will not be told more than you can find out yourself. It doesn't give you any special status or consideration.
It will do you no good to write your wedding date down on your paperwork or cover letter. USCIS are under no compulsion to make your time frame.
You cannot go ahead if your visa is not granted in time, and marry anyway. You would have to begin again, at the expense of more time and money. Impatience could earn your fiance a ban, and is it really worth that?
You will not get an expedite citing severe financial loss. That you imprudently went ahead and organized and paid for a wedding without benefit of Visa in hand does not fit the criteria. The US citizen portion of a couple needs to prove that they are financially able to support their spouse, and I get a little nervous when I see people at the early in the plot K1 petition stage pleading financial hardship.
Read up on the process. Understand that none of us are particularly fond of USCIS, or the way that they do business. They are the only game in town. If nothing else, please try to grasp that USCIS want what they want, and how they want it. If they grant you and your fiance a Visa, they will do so in their own good time.
You have stated EXACTLY what I would say.
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Not to offend anyone, but I'm sure I will....
I can't STAND it when people try to "get around" immigration laws and procedures. I'm sorry, but if "oh, we have a wedding date, and vendors, and people flying out, etc etc etc" could get you an expedite, then EVERYONE would be doing it. UGHHHHH, people, don't plan ANYTHING until visa in hand. Geesh
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I meant to say " remove conditions" not adjust status
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Yesterday, I received a letter from USCIS requesting proof that my husband is eligible for his IR-1, not CR-1. His status at POE was CR-1, but should of been IR-1 because we have been married over two years prior to his POE. We were treated awful when calling USCIS customer service to inquire about having this correctly. The representative went as far to say that he was given a CR-1 status because they(Casa) did not completely feel that we had a true relationship and then hung up on me. I am just shocked that she had the nerve to misquote the law. Now what to do?
wow, I have no advice, but am so sorry this is happening. #######?? The consulate/USCIS can circumvent the law just because they don't believe the relationship still, and now you have to essentially adjust status?? Is that even legal?!?
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The thing that is saddest to me about this whole thing, is that she didn't decide to not have children. If you look at her previous post, she said he announced to her, after they had previously agreed on having children, that they would not be having children. Not only is it really sad, but it's actually grounds for annulment.
I respect, and see your point. My son's aunt has been married for about 20 years now. She has a 23 year old step daughter, but when she met her husband, they both said they wanted no more kids, until I had my son 7 years ago. I found out that having my son around made her change her mind, she wanted a child, but her husband wouldn't budge on the issue. The difference of this story is, they both said they didn't want kids from the beginning, but I am comparing this story because my ex-SIL had changed her mind, and had to compromise with her husband, and in the end, they decided against having kids. I remember telling my ex how bad I felt for her, wanting to have a child, but her husband didn't. I couldn't make that sacrifice. I dated someone before my husband, who had 2 kids, and was done. I always wanted another child, but he was adamant that "God says that I shouldn't have anymore." Needless to say, that relationship didn't last, but there were also many, many, many other issues, we just didn't belong together. My SIL and her husband are still together, and I don't see an end in sight for them. She is also very close to my son. These are tough choices.
I can't sit here and say for sure what is going on here, but I do know that they have been involved for a very long time, and nobody knows exactly what is going on but them. The women having an opinion here are more experienced than me when it comes to this topic, all I can say is what I know. My husband is turning 28 this year and he is dying to be a father. He lost his father about a year and a half ago, and ever since then, becoming a father has been more at the forefront than before. He always wanted kids, but now, he is ready, and so am I, as I am turning 31 this year. We didn't expect our journey to be so long, otherwise, we might have had a child by now.
I wish nothing but the best for Olivia. Yes, she came on here and told her personal story, which she is probably regretting now, but it's done. In the end, she will do what she feels is right with the knowledge that she has. (((HUGS))) to her
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My grandparents emigrated when my mother was 12, and whilst my mother never had any adjustment issues my grandparents always kept their traditions even though they lived for another 60 years.
I have been in the US for 7 years, and looking back it probably did take me a year to fully get used to things.
But there are certain tenets that will never change, you are what you are.
Probably a female thing to think that the man you marry is raw material to be moulded into what you want. That is just not the case.
My guess here is that the attractions of coming to the US do not include religous/beliefs/culture so those thing will not alter.
I'm a woman also, and never wish my husband to change....why the heck would I have married him if I wanted to change who he was
Just like we shouldn't generalize that you should only be wary of marrying MENA men (you should be wary marrying anyone), people shouldn't generalize that every woman is a femenazi who wishes to emasculate their husbands.
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CR1 is not only for those married over 2 years. That's the route we went and we were not married for 2+ years.
Cr1 is what you file if you have been married less than 2 years. IR1 is if you are filing after being married for two years. If you file a CR1, but have been married for 2 years or more by the time of visa issuance, you will get an IR1, and will not have to remove conditions. Cr1 is a conditional green card. That's the difference
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It takes some pre-planning ahead of time. I have several back-up native speakers that can translate both here in the US and in the local area that I can call. I keep them on speed dial. I may never need to call them, but its good to have that option in place if needed.
That's a great idea. Thanks
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I am happy to hear everything is working out! I often wonder what would happen if something happened to my husband....nobody in his family speaks english, how would I find out if something happened to him? That must have been so scary for you. I have been through my own immigration hell, and this is what my husband told me once, "easy come, easy go" You guys are fighting for something that will be so worth it in the end, and that fighting has strengthened your relationship, I know it has with my husband. Good luck
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i got refus last week they say that they will send my wife letter about why they refus to give me visa
my ask is ; how long it take untill my wife get this letter ? if it "s possble to our immigration lawyer know why i dont get visa ?
my wife is my life never give up never leave each other forever togther
This depends how long it takes the petition to leave the consulate. This could take 6 weeks, to a few months. Once the USCIS receives the petition, the average time for NOIR is 6 months. USCIS will let you know when the get your petition. It took us almost 9 months to get ours. I suggest you enjoy your lives while you wait, otherwise it will make you crazy. Good luck
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I am so sorry to hear this, knowing she lost both her children...just takes my breath away. My condolences
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You need to take a deep breath and relax.
Did you understand my answer of what your wife needs to do?
There is nothing else to know....just read my response and that is what your wife needs to do.
It's true sir, this is it. What we have told you is it. I understand how it feels when you first get denied, you are in shock for days. I really understand how you feel, but it is SO IMPORTANT to go through this calmly and wisely. Work with your heads, you and your wife, and not your emotions/hearts, when dealing with anyone in immigration, especially the consulate. I hope you take this advice, and proceed wisely. Good luck
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Thank you togetherforever for reposting my advice. OP, the advice I gave you is correct. togetherforever is correct in saying that this is where your wife needs to be calling her senators. The senator's office will have her sign a release so they can speak on her behalf, and they can make an inquiry to the consulate. She can email the consulate, stating her side, and requesting another interview. They are pretty good at responding to emails. Try this, but most likely, your case will still be sent back to USCIS. In that case, my advice that was reposted is where you will go from there.
This is the link to find her senators http://www.senate.gov/general/contact_information/senators_cfm.cfm
This is the email for the consulate ivcasablanca@state.gov
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This situation is not funny. He sent me an email, and I tried to personally help him. Others have tried to help him as well, yet he still asks the same questions over and over. Not to mention, he can't get his story straight. I have quite a bit of sympathy for denials because I have been through 2 of them, which is why I tried to help. But I now feel something isn't right, and I have a right to state that opinion. I wish the OP good luck, he is in for a looooonnnngggggg wait.
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That requirement hasn't changed. If you can't get it together to write a factual 'story' you have less credibility than you may have otherwise done.
I can respect that, although it doesn't change the fact that marriage fraud is alive and well
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He doesn't have his facts straight. For someone who states he was a CO, among other things.
The process is similar for Americans who petition for a fiancé, rather than a foreign-born spouse, but they must file the petition with USCIS regardless of where they reside and must wed within six month of the fiancé’s arrival in the United States. If they do not, the foreign national must return home, though many find ways to stay, either legally or illegally.
On the whole, this is a very tedious read. He clearly has a strong bias, sees fraud under every rock.
I did notice the discrepancy in the time to marry for K1. It was written 4 years ago, and I know some things may have changed. For example, Morocco used to allow DCF, and now it doesn't, you need to file stateside. I see he has a strong bias, but he was a CO, so this just shows me what I already figured about CO's, that they are jaded from all the fraud that they do see on a regular basis. He does state there are many legitimate couples, but the article is about marriage fraud, so it goes into those details. I went into my relationship with eyes wide open, having read all the horror stories from the beginning, and was cautious of the red flags and such. I think it's important for people to read what DOES happen, that not every potential spouse has good intentions. Thanks for taking the time to read!
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Maybe it's not my place, but why are you accepting money from her knowing that she is basically poor?!? My husband never, ever relies on me for income, and because of a past relationship I had with a user who took advantage of my "giving" nature (which was just stupidity on my part), I would never have stayed with my hubby if he took my money, over and over again, knowing I'm a single mom. He has wayy too much pride for that. I make almost double what your wife does, and I still can't see how I would afford to send him money all the time. I did send his family money when his father passed away, but that was a different circumstance. I expect my husband to pull his weight, and he does. I don't want money from him, and he doesn't take money from me. I pay for my plane tickets out there, and he pays for everything that I need on my trips. We try to be equal on the money we put into this relationship. Also, there are too many discrepancies in your story. I had compassion for you before, but I'm too cynical and suspicious, and something doesn't seem right here.
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I agree with the recommendations also. There are way too many loopholes in the current system.
Age difference
in Middle East and North Africa
Posted · Edited by tany1157
Yea, I was just thinking people shouldn't be giving advice if they don't know what they are talking about. The prophet being married to an older woman has nothing to do with visa fraud in Morocco. Some countries, age isn't a red flag. In Morocco, older women marrying young Moroccan men is a big red flag. Why?? First it is not the social norm, second, most young men in their culture want children, yet they marry women past child bearing age. I am in no way saying they are all doomed to fail, but the ones that work are the exception, NOT the norm.
Also, after what you asked me, I'm pretty positive something isn't right in your relationship. But if your woman, who sounds like she's on the rebound from JUST being divorced, is willing to believe what you say, then so be iit. But what she believes will have no effect on what the consulate will see, and what they think YOUR intentions are.