Gemmie

Melissa, I don't know what happened in the other thread in Site Updates that got closed because post/s were deleted. I posted those examples of the things Julian has said because you didn't believe that he could possibly say something like that. I hate to break it to you, but you DO know he can say things like that, because he's made several antagonizing posts in topics that you have been involved in (and you even spent a while apologizing on his behalf) and they were towards Americans, Jamaicans, Russians etc. If you need proof of that, I can find those too.
If you don't like that people are saying these horrible things about your relationship, then ignore it. Do you know what I would do if someone told me that I'm with my husband for selfish gain? Let them think what they like, because it doesn't affect me or my relationship. I know why I'm in this. Don't come in here once the topic has been closed just to open up another can of worms. If you were really upset that Julian has said certain things, why not log off VJ and speak to him directly about it? The moment someone else agrees with you and says that Julian has been saying horrible things for a long time, you jump to his defense and claim that no one here knows him and calling us condescending b!tches.
Comparing how much your situation is worse than others is a losing battle, as someone else pointed out. In the time your entire process has taken until now, we hadn't even gotten the NOA2 yet. You're lucky enough to see Julian often while many people either don't have the money to do so, or have too many ties meaning they can't leave. You're lucky enough to have bought a 4/5/whatever bedroom house that is to your liking while many people are either living with in-laws trying to save up the money or living paycheck to paycheck after the visa process has cleared their bank accounts. You're lucky enough to have the option of working full/part time, being a housewife, being a mother, whatever you want because you're financially secure enough to choose; while many people are dying for their EAD so they can work any job they can to pull money. Try focusing on those things whenever you feel the need to whine about how many hurdles you've had to overcome. And by the way, I don't say that out of jealousy. I say that because it's offensive to see you bring up your horrible process and compare it to others when you've been extremely lucky.
****
Please don't close this topic, it isn't involving language, sexual tone, racism, sexism, etc. There's not even any bullying going on here. It's no different to any other topic where there's a different in viewpoint.

I'm pleased with the idea.
BUT I still think moderators need to be less trigger-happy.

I'm pleased with the idea.
BUT I still think moderators need to be less trigger-happy.

I'm pleased with the idea.
BUT I still think moderators need to be less trigger-happy.

I don't know if this has already been said, but you will not be arrested in the UK for standing at the side of the road and shouting "you are a fat #######". Do you know how many people I've seen that have public arguments or say these kind of things? I couldn't even count. If anything, you almost need to commit an act of violence to get arrested for anything.
First of all, there are different social rules between the countries. Americans are extremely polite and friendly, while Brits are blunt and generally act how they feel. How people interact is vastly different, and that includes friends or acquaintances using derogatory terms towards each other. Secondly, I think it's the opposite as you describe. I can say pretty much anything in the UK without worrying what people will think of me, but I don't feel that in the US. I don't mean racist terms because I wouldn't even want to say things like that anyway. But bad language, political opinions, banter etc is more prone in British streets, in my opinion. I believe freedom of speech is more alive in the UK.

Melissa, I don't know what happened in the other thread in Site Updates that got closed because post/s were deleted. I posted those examples of the things Julian has said because you didn't believe that he could possibly say something like that. I hate to break it to you, but you DO know he can say things like that, because he's made several antagonizing posts in topics that you have been involved in (and you even spent a while apologizing on his behalf) and they were towards Americans, Jamaicans, Russians etc. If you need proof of that, I can find those too.
If you don't like that people are saying these horrible things about your relationship, then ignore it. Do you know what I would do if someone told me that I'm with my husband for selfish gain? Let them think what they like, because it doesn't affect me or my relationship. I know why I'm in this. Don't come in here once the topic has been closed just to open up another can of worms. If you were really upset that Julian has said certain things, why not log off VJ and speak to him directly about it? The moment someone else agrees with you and says that Julian has been saying horrible things for a long time, you jump to his defense and claim that no one here knows him and calling us condescending b!tches.
Comparing how much your situation is worse than others is a losing battle, as someone else pointed out. In the time your entire process has taken until now, we hadn't even gotten the NOA2 yet. You're lucky enough to see Julian often while many people either don't have the money to do so, or have too many ties meaning they can't leave. You're lucky enough to have bought a 4/5/whatever bedroom house that is to your liking while many people are either living with in-laws trying to save up the money or living paycheck to paycheck after the visa process has cleared their bank accounts. You're lucky enough to have the option of working full/part time, being a housewife, being a mother, whatever you want because you're financially secure enough to choose; while many people are dying for their EAD so they can work any job they can to pull money. Try focusing on those things whenever you feel the need to whine about how many hurdles you've had to overcome. And by the way, I don't say that out of jealousy. I say that because it's offensive to see you bring up your horrible process and compare it to others when you've been extremely lucky.
****
Please don't close this topic, it isn't involving language, sexual tone, racism, sexism, etc. There's not even any bullying going on here. It's no different to any other topic where there's a different in viewpoint.

Melissa, I don't know what happened in the other thread in Site Updates that got closed because post/s were deleted. I posted those examples of the things Julian has said because you didn't believe that he could possibly say something like that. I hate to break it to you, but you DO know he can say things like that, because he's made several antagonizing posts in topics that you have been involved in (and you even spent a while apologizing on his behalf) and they were towards Americans, Jamaicans, Russians etc. If you need proof of that, I can find those too.
If you don't like that people are saying these horrible things about your relationship, then ignore it. Do you know what I would do if someone told me that I'm with my husband for selfish gain? Let them think what they like, because it doesn't affect me or my relationship. I know why I'm in this. Don't come in here once the topic has been closed just to open up another can of worms. If you were really upset that Julian has said certain things, why not log off VJ and speak to him directly about it? The moment someone else agrees with you and says that Julian has been saying horrible things for a long time, you jump to his defense and claim that no one here knows him and calling us condescending b!tches.
Comparing how much your situation is worse than others is a losing battle, as someone else pointed out. In the time your entire process has taken until now, we hadn't even gotten the NOA2 yet. You're lucky enough to see Julian often while many people either don't have the money to do so, or have too many ties meaning they can't leave. You're lucky enough to have bought a 4/5/whatever bedroom house that is to your liking while many people are either living with in-laws trying to save up the money or living paycheck to paycheck after the visa process has cleared their bank accounts. You're lucky enough to have the option of working full/part time, being a housewife, being a mother, whatever you want because you're financially secure enough to choose; while many people are dying for their EAD so they can work any job they can to pull money. Try focusing on those things whenever you feel the need to whine about how many hurdles you've had to overcome. And by the way, I don't say that out of jealousy. I say that because it's offensive to see you bring up your horrible process and compare it to others when you've been extremely lucky.
****
Please don't close this topic, it isn't involving language, sexual tone, racism, sexism, etc. There's not even any bullying going on here. It's no different to any other topic where there's a different in viewpoint.

Melissa, I don't know what happened in the other thread in Site Updates that got closed because post/s were deleted. I posted those examples of the things Julian has said because you didn't believe that he could possibly say something like that. I hate to break it to you, but you DO know he can say things like that, because he's made several antagonizing posts in topics that you have been involved in (and you even spent a while apologizing on his behalf) and they were towards Americans, Jamaicans, Russians etc. If you need proof of that, I can find those too.
If you don't like that people are saying these horrible things about your relationship, then ignore it. Do you know what I would do if someone told me that I'm with my husband for selfish gain? Let them think what they like, because it doesn't affect me or my relationship. I know why I'm in this. Don't come in here once the topic has been closed just to open up another can of worms. If you were really upset that Julian has said certain things, why not log off VJ and speak to him directly about it? The moment someone else agrees with you and says that Julian has been saying horrible things for a long time, you jump to his defense and claim that no one here knows him and calling us condescending b!tches.
Comparing how much your situation is worse than others is a losing battle, as someone else pointed out. In the time your entire process has taken until now, we hadn't even gotten the NOA2 yet. You're lucky enough to see Julian often while many people either don't have the money to do so, or have too many ties meaning they can't leave. You're lucky enough to have bought a 4/5/whatever bedroom house that is to your liking while many people are either living with in-laws trying to save up the money or living paycheck to paycheck after the visa process has cleared their bank accounts. You're lucky enough to have the option of working full/part time, being a housewife, being a mother, whatever you want because you're financially secure enough to choose; while many people are dying for their EAD so they can work any job they can to pull money. Try focusing on those things whenever you feel the need to whine about how many hurdles you've had to overcome. And by the way, I don't say that out of jealousy. I say that because it's offensive to see you bring up your horrible process and compare it to others when you've been extremely lucky.
****
Please don't close this topic, it isn't involving language, sexual tone, racism, sexism, etc. There's not even any bullying going on here. It's no different to any other topic where there's a different in viewpoint.

Melissa, I don't know what happened in the other thread in Site Updates that got closed because post/s were deleted. I posted those examples of the things Julian has said because you didn't believe that he could possibly say something like that. I hate to break it to you, but you DO know he can say things like that, because he's made several antagonizing posts in topics that you have been involved in (and you even spent a while apologizing on his behalf) and they were towards Americans, Jamaicans, Russians etc. If you need proof of that, I can find those too.
If you don't like that people are saying these horrible things about your relationship, then ignore it. Do you know what I would do if someone told me that I'm with my husband for selfish gain? Let them think what they like, because it doesn't affect me or my relationship. I know why I'm in this. Don't come in here once the topic has been closed just to open up another can of worms. If you were really upset that Julian has said certain things, why not log off VJ and speak to him directly about it? The moment someone else agrees with you and says that Julian has been saying horrible things for a long time, you jump to his defense and claim that no one here knows him and calling us condescending b!tches.
Comparing how much your situation is worse than others is a losing battle, as someone else pointed out. In the time your entire process has taken until now, we hadn't even gotten the NOA2 yet. You're lucky enough to see Julian often while many people either don't have the money to do so, or have too many ties meaning they can't leave. You're lucky enough to have bought a 4/5/whatever bedroom house that is to your liking while many people are either living with in-laws trying to save up the money or living paycheck to paycheck after the visa process has cleared their bank accounts. You're lucky enough to have the option of working full/part time, being a housewife, being a mother, whatever you want because you're financially secure enough to choose; while many people are dying for their EAD so they can work any job they can to pull money. Try focusing on those things whenever you feel the need to whine about how many hurdles you've had to overcome. And by the way, I don't say that out of jealousy. I say that because it's offensive to see you bring up your horrible process and compare it to others when you've been extremely lucky.
****
Please don't close this topic, it isn't involving language, sexual tone, racism, sexism, etc. There's not even any bullying going on here. It's no different to any other topic where there's a different in viewpoint.

Julian, I will apologise for saying that you said "I can see why your marriage failed". This is actually what you said to a poster that had told in the same thread how her marriage was ending (the following was in three different posts):
(Which to me, hints that he can see WHY the situation occured)
I might be wrong, but I think there was some more of that in another thread too, directed at the same person. It might not have been a direct attack on someone's personal problems, but referencing the situation in such a way is kind of a dcik move to me.
Anyway, before this turns into another discussion about Julian, it was an example of how VJ, and the UK forum especially, has been known to stir up a lot of language, sexual tone, and conflict. You'll notice that those topics usually went on for tens of pages, and lately there's been a huge lock-down on mild examples of the same.

Kathryn, you personally think we should have a separate forum for 'political discussions' because it often spews up a whole ton of negative conflict. I think that's ridiculous. In that case, why not make a separate forum just for 'discussions with sexual content'? Or better yet, a forum dedicated to people that want to degrade women? I've said this in another thread, but I do remember times where topics went on for pages and pages that were directly name-calling and extreme viewpoints that upset a lot of people. If I wanted to report Gary for insulting posters by insinuating that UK women are ugly because they don't show personal photos, or Alan/saywhat for talking about women as though they are another species, or Slim for posting his degrading views on prostitution, I could be here all day. But I don't, because it's expected when you have an off-topic forum for all people.
Lately there have been a mountain of things removed for little reason, mostly by you. Melissa posting a thread led to a small spat between two posters (apparently she accused someone of being fake, and they accused her of being an attention-seeker - is that really so bad?) and it was locked completely. Someone posts a paragraph about what happened on a recent date in a between-friends context and it's removed and the topic is closed. I see that several posts are removed for "language"... seriously? What can be that bad that you have to remove such language when we have full-blown arguments going on in OT? Is "you sound like a douche-bag" enough to close a topic? We don't want to hurt peoples feelings by be-littling their opinion. What about "I can see why your marriage failed"? I've seen Julian make remarks like that several times to a poster here. At what point does it become 'too personal' enough to delete?
In that case, you might as well close all of the OT forums because they all discuss things that have no relevance to immigration. The Canadian forum has a 'vent thread' where they can b!itch and moan about personal problems (which I actually love to visit), the RUB forum sometimes has threads solely to talk about how much better their wives are than other nationalities, and the UK forum likes to discuss their love of cheese and bread. Then we have the OT threads about all kinds of stuff from political events to sexual research. None of this is relevant to immigration, so you can't use that old card.
The point is, when you have a site with so many people from varying backgrounds and beliefs, you're going to get some conflict and different levels of what is 'normal' to share.

Kathryn, you personally think we should have a separate forum for 'political discussions' because it often spews up a whole ton of negative conflict. I think that's ridiculous. In that case, why not make a separate forum just for 'discussions with sexual content'? Or better yet, a forum dedicated to people that want to degrade women? I've said this in another thread, but I do remember times where topics went on for pages and pages that were directly name-calling and extreme viewpoints that upset a lot of people. If I wanted to report Gary for insulting posters by insinuating that UK women are ugly because they don't show personal photos, or Alan/saywhat for talking about women as though they are another species, or Slim for posting his degrading views on prostitution, I could be here all day. But I don't, because it's expected when you have an off-topic forum for all people.
Lately there have been a mountain of things removed for little reason, mostly by you. Melissa posting a thread led to a small spat between two posters (apparently she accused someone of being fake, and they accused her of being an attention-seeker - is that really so bad?) and it was locked completely. Someone posts a paragraph about what happened on a recent date in a between-friends context and it's removed and the topic is closed. I see that several posts are removed for "language"... seriously? What can be that bad that you have to remove such language when we have full-blown arguments going on in OT? Is "you sound like a douche-bag" enough to close a topic? We don't want to hurt peoples feelings by be-littling their opinion. What about "I can see why your marriage failed"? I've seen Julian make remarks like that several times to a poster here. At what point does it become 'too personal' enough to delete?
In that case, you might as well close all of the OT forums because they all discuss things that have no relevance to immigration. The Canadian forum has a 'vent thread' where they can b!itch and moan about personal problems (which I actually love to visit), the RUB forum sometimes has threads solely to talk about how much better their wives are than other nationalities, and the UK forum likes to discuss their love of cheese and bread. Then we have the OT threads about all kinds of stuff from political events to sexual research. None of this is relevant to immigration, so you can't use that old card.
The point is, when you have a site with so many people from varying backgrounds and beliefs, you're going to get some conflict and different levels of what is 'normal' to share.

Kathryn, you personally think we should have a separate forum for 'political discussions' because it often spews up a whole ton of negative conflict. I think that's ridiculous. In that case, why not make a separate forum just for 'discussions with sexual content'? Or better yet, a forum dedicated to people that want to degrade women? I've said this in another thread, but I do remember times where topics went on for pages and pages that were directly name-calling and extreme viewpoints that upset a lot of people. If I wanted to report Gary for insulting posters by insinuating that UK women are ugly because they don't show personal photos, or Alan/saywhat for talking about women as though they are another species, or Slim for posting his degrading views on prostitution, I could be here all day. But I don't, because it's expected when you have an off-topic forum for all people.
Lately there have been a mountain of things removed for little reason, mostly by you. Melissa posting a thread led to a small spat between two posters (apparently she accused someone of being fake, and they accused her of being an attention-seeker - is that really so bad?) and it was locked completely. Someone posts a paragraph about what happened on a recent date in a between-friends context and it's removed and the topic is closed. I see that several posts are removed for "language"... seriously? What can be that bad that you have to remove such language when we have full-blown arguments going on in OT? Is "you sound like a douche-bag" enough to close a topic? We don't want to hurt peoples feelings by be-littling their opinion. What about "I can see why your marriage failed"? I've seen Julian make remarks like that several times to a poster here. At what point does it become 'too personal' enough to delete?
In that case, you might as well close all of the OT forums because they all discuss things that have no relevance to immigration. The Canadian forum has a 'vent thread' where they can b!itch and moan about personal problems (which I actually love to visit), the RUB forum sometimes has threads solely to talk about how much better their wives are than other nationalities, and the UK forum likes to discuss their love of cheese and bread. Then we have the OT threads about all kinds of stuff from political events to sexual research. None of this is relevant to immigration, so you can't use that old card.
The point is, when you have a site with so many people from varying backgrounds and beliefs, you're going to get some conflict and different levels of what is 'normal' to share.

Kathryn, you personally think we should have a separate forum for 'political discussions' because it often spews up a whole ton of negative conflict. I think that's ridiculous. In that case, why not make a separate forum just for 'discussions with sexual content'? Or better yet, a forum dedicated to people that want to degrade women? I've said this in another thread, but I do remember times where topics went on for pages and pages that were directly name-calling and extreme viewpoints that upset a lot of people. If I wanted to report Gary for insulting posters by insinuating that UK women are ugly because they don't show personal photos, or Alan/saywhat for talking about women as though they are another species, or Slim for posting his degrading views on prostitution, I could be here all day. But I don't, because it's expected when you have an off-topic forum for all people.
Lately there have been a mountain of things removed for little reason, mostly by you. Melissa posting a thread led to a small spat between two posters (apparently she accused someone of being fake, and they accused her of being an attention-seeker - is that really so bad?) and it was locked completely. Someone posts a paragraph about what happened on a recent date in a between-friends context and it's removed and the topic is closed. I see that several posts are removed for "language"... seriously? What can be that bad that you have to remove such language when we have full-blown arguments going on in OT? Is "you sound like a douche-bag" enough to close a topic? We don't want to hurt peoples feelings by be-littling their opinion. What about "I can see why your marriage failed"? I've seen Julian make remarks like that several times to a poster here. At what point does it become 'too personal' enough to delete?
In that case, you might as well close all of the OT forums because they all discuss things that have no relevance to immigration. The Canadian forum has a 'vent thread' where they can b!itch and moan about personal problems (which I actually love to visit), the RUB forum sometimes has threads solely to talk about how much better their wives are than other nationalities, and the UK forum likes to discuss their love of cheese and bread. Then we have the OT threads about all kinds of stuff from political events to sexual research. None of this is relevant to immigration, so you can't use that old card.
The point is, when you have a site with so many people from varying backgrounds and beliefs, you're going to get some conflict and different levels of what is 'normal' to share.

Kathryn, you personally think we should have a separate forum for 'political discussions' because it often spews up a whole ton of negative conflict. I think that's ridiculous. In that case, why not make a separate forum just for 'discussions with sexual content'? Or better yet, a forum dedicated to people that want to degrade women? I've said this in another thread, but I do remember times where topics went on for pages and pages that were directly name-calling and extreme viewpoints that upset a lot of people. If I wanted to report Gary for insulting posters by insinuating that UK women are ugly because they don't show personal photos, or Alan/saywhat for talking about women as though they are another species, or Slim for posting his degrading views on prostitution, I could be here all day. But I don't, because it's expected when you have an off-topic forum for all people.
Lately there have been a mountain of things removed for little reason, mostly by you. Melissa posting a thread led to a small spat between two posters (apparently she accused someone of being fake, and they accused her of being an attention-seeker - is that really so bad?) and it was locked completely. Someone posts a paragraph about what happened on a recent date in a between-friends context and it's removed and the topic is closed. I see that several posts are removed for "language"... seriously? What can be that bad that you have to remove such language when we have full-blown arguments going on in OT? Is "you sound like a douche-bag" enough to close a topic? We don't want to hurt peoples feelings by be-littling their opinion. What about "I can see why your marriage failed"? I've seen Julian make remarks like that several times to a poster here. At what point does it become 'too personal' enough to delete?
In that case, you might as well close all of the OT forums because they all discuss things that have no relevance to immigration. The Canadian forum has a 'vent thread' where they can b!itch and moan about personal problems (which I actually love to visit), the RUB forum sometimes has threads solely to talk about how much better their wives are than other nationalities, and the UK forum likes to discuss their love of cheese and bread. Then we have the OT threads about all kinds of stuff from political events to sexual research. None of this is relevant to immigration, so you can't use that old card.
The point is, when you have a site with so many people from varying backgrounds and beliefs, you're going to get some conflict and different levels of what is 'normal' to share.

Kathryn, you personally think we should have a separate forum for 'political discussions' because it often spews up a whole ton of negative conflict. I think that's ridiculous. In that case, why not make a separate forum just for 'discussions with sexual content'? Or better yet, a forum dedicated to people that want to degrade women? I've said this in another thread, but I do remember times where topics went on for pages and pages that were directly name-calling and extreme viewpoints that upset a lot of people. If I wanted to report Gary for insulting posters by insinuating that UK women are ugly because they don't show personal photos, or Alan/saywhat for talking about women as though they are another species, or Slim for posting his degrading views on prostitution, I could be here all day. But I don't, because it's expected when you have an off-topic forum for all people.
Lately there have been a mountain of things removed for little reason, mostly by you. Melissa posting a thread led to a small spat between two posters (apparently she accused someone of being fake, and they accused her of being an attention-seeker - is that really so bad?) and it was locked completely. Someone posts a paragraph about what happened on a recent date in a between-friends context and it's removed and the topic is closed. I see that several posts are removed for "language"... seriously? What can be that bad that you have to remove such language when we have full-blown arguments going on in OT? Is "you sound like a douche-bag" enough to close a topic? We don't want to hurt peoples feelings by be-littling their opinion. What about "I can see why your marriage failed"? I've seen Julian make remarks like that several times to a poster here. At what point does it become 'too personal' enough to delete?
In that case, you might as well close all of the OT forums because they all discuss things that have no relevance to immigration. The Canadian forum has a 'vent thread' where they can b!itch and moan about personal problems (which I actually love to visit), the RUB forum sometimes has threads solely to talk about how much better their wives are than other nationalities, and the UK forum likes to discuss their love of cheese and bread. Then we have the OT threads about all kinds of stuff from political events to sexual research. None of this is relevant to immigration, so you can't use that old card.
The point is, when you have a site with so many people from varying backgrounds and beliefs, you're going to get some conflict and different levels of what is 'normal' to share.

Or maybe Gary could've reacted like "Really? That's cool if you think so". It's expected that someone would find their wife more attractive than someone else, so I wouldn't take that as a personal challenge, which is what Gary did. That is where he comes off as egotistical and shallow.
If someone tells me that their 1 year old is a better walker than my 1 year old, I'm not going to ask for video proof. If they think that (after seeing both of our children), then fine. I'm not going to call them out on it for refusing to give me a video as evidence. I'd let them think whatever they like, and get on with my life, and keep feeling proud of my own 1 year old.

Some people here are so sad.
To constantly list why your wife is such a catch in an effort to prove to others that you did a great job? To suggest that RUB women are more attractive than women from other countries? Is that why people from other forums don't show pictures of their spouses, because they just don't compare? I don't know if you were talking about me when you said "scraped photo from movie trailer" but that is actually me in the picture. I sometimes model for my friend who is doing an art/make-up degree. I'm under no illusion that I'm the most attractive person on the forum, and I don't care. I don't need to list my educational credits and links to my photos to get people to reaffirm that I'm worthy.
Now I see why people have that vision of old American men sending off for mail-order brides from Russia. It's because they have great boobs, age well, fart flowers and burp puppies!
For the record, I think Alla is physically overrated. It doesn't matter what I think because I'm not the agency that promotes her, and I'm not the man who married her, but I'm just giving my opinion since Gary seems intent to make everyone in awe of his wife. She's attractive, but not as highly as insinuated. But then she's not really my type.

Some people here are so sad.
To constantly list why your wife is such a catch in an effort to prove to others that you did a great job? To suggest that RUB women are more attractive than women from other countries? Is that why people from other forums don't show pictures of their spouses, because they just don't compare? I don't know if you were talking about me when you said "scraped photo from movie trailer" but that is actually me in the picture. I sometimes model for my friend who is doing an art/make-up degree. I'm under no illusion that I'm the most attractive person on the forum, and I don't care. I don't need to list my educational credits and links to my photos to get people to reaffirm that I'm worthy.
Now I see why people have that vision of old American men sending off for mail-order brides from Russia. It's because they have great boobs, age well, fart flowers and burp puppies!
For the record, I think Alla is physically overrated. It doesn't matter what I think because I'm not the agency that promotes her, and I'm not the man who married her, but I'm just giving my opinion since Gary seems intent to make everyone in awe of his wife. She's attractive, but not as highly as insinuated. But then she's not really my type.

Some people here are so sad.
To constantly list why your wife is such a catch in an effort to prove to others that you did a great job? To suggest that RUB women are more attractive than women from other countries? Is that why people from other forums don't show pictures of their spouses, because they just don't compare? I don't know if you were talking about me when you said "scraped photo from movie trailer" but that is actually me in the picture. I sometimes model for my friend who is doing an art/make-up degree. I'm under no illusion that I'm the most attractive person on the forum, and I don't care. I don't need to list my educational credits and links to my photos to get people to reaffirm that I'm worthy.
Now I see why people have that vision of old American men sending off for mail-order brides from Russia. It's because they have great boobs, age well, fart flowers and burp puppies!
For the record, I think Alla is physically overrated. It doesn't matter what I think because I'm not the agency that promotes her, and I'm not the man who married her, but I'm just giving my opinion since Gary seems intent to make everyone in awe of his wife. She's attractive, but not as highly as insinuated. But then she's not really my type.

Some people here are so sad.
To constantly list why your wife is such a catch in an effort to prove to others that you did a great job? To suggest that RUB women are more attractive than women from other countries? Is that why people from other forums don't show pictures of their spouses, because they just don't compare? I don't know if you were talking about me when you said "scraped photo from movie trailer" but that is actually me in the picture. I sometimes model for my friend who is doing an art/make-up degree. I'm under no illusion that I'm the most attractive person on the forum, and I don't care. I don't need to list my educational credits and links to my photos to get people to reaffirm that I'm worthy.
Now I see why people have that vision of old American men sending off for mail-order brides from Russia. It's because they have great boobs, age well, fart flowers and burp puppies!
For the record, I think Alla is physically overrated. It doesn't matter what I think because I'm not the agency that promotes her, and I'm not the man who married her, but I'm just giving my opinion since Gary seems intent to make everyone in awe of his wife. She's attractive, but not as highly as insinuated. But then she's not really my type.

I said this to some of my friends and they looked at me as though I had sprouted a potato from my head.
I will only be part of a monogamous relationship. This isn't because I'm afraid of disease but because I want an exclusive connection between me and my partner.
BUT I don't think humans are naturally monogamous.

I said this to some of my friends and they looked at me as though I had sprouted a potato from my head.
I will only be part of a monogamous relationship. This isn't because I'm afraid of disease but because I want an exclusive connection between me and my partner.
BUT I don't think humans are naturally monogamous.

Personally, I would keep the comments on, because you admit you want to get feedback and viewpoints from things that are going on in your life.
Solution to the horrible comments; 1- Don't react to them at all. You'll notice that as soon as you posted how upset you were about the comments, they came in BUNDLES. If you blank them entirely, people will get bored. 2- Shrug them off when you do get them. I don't even find them funny. Jokes about being gay or sex with animals or whatever? Boring, and silly.
The only thing I don't understand is that you say you want this feedback from outside your perspective, but then whenever gives you some that doesn't fit with how you see things in your life, you quickly defend why your view is the right one. It might be, heck it's your life. But if you feel certain that you know yourself and the people in your life are the way you perceive them - why bother about what others think? Seems like a contradiction, and I think that's where people are accusing you of attention seeking.
For example, "I just bought these jeans, what do you think?"
"Hmmm, I think they might be a little too small for you."
"Well they're not, and I can't believe people think that! They're perfect for me."

Personally, I would keep the comments on, because you admit you want to get feedback and viewpoints from things that are going on in your life.
Solution to the horrible comments; 1- Don't react to them at all. You'll notice that as soon as you posted how upset you were about the comments, they came in BUNDLES. If you blank them entirely, people will get bored. 2- Shrug them off when you do get them. I don't even find them funny. Jokes about being gay or sex with animals or whatever? Boring, and silly.
The only thing I don't understand is that you say you want this feedback from outside your perspective, but then whenever gives you some that doesn't fit with how you see things in your life, you quickly defend why your view is the right one. It might be, heck it's your life. But if you feel certain that you know yourself and the people in your life are the way you perceive them - why bother about what others think? Seems like a contradiction, and I think that's where people are accusing you of attention seeking.
For example, "I just bought these jeans, what do you think?"
"Hmmm, I think they might be a little too small for you."
"Well they're not, and I can't believe people think that! They're perfect for me."