I strongly recommend you find a way to hire an attorney to help you. ..it gets complicated…and it’s a legal process that can baffle even highly educated lawyers….not just a “bunch of forms “
Nonetheless here is a list of steps :
1. Do a free online FOIA to get a complete copy of your A-file / record w USCIS
https://www.uscis.gov/records/request-records-through-the-freedom-of-information-act-or-privacy-act
**If case was denied due to abandonment ( wife not showing up) you are ok..but if they suspected sham marriage..it’s a big big problem. so you need to see a copy of the denial decision.and determine if I-485 denied only or was I-130 affected **
2. Email to embassy can be short /simple. “ Your name, Case no., date of birth. Request to cancel IV interview and request for case transfer back to USCIS. I will not be pursuing consular process and will be adjusting status within the US”
3. Adjustment of status packet requires
I-130 copy of approval ( filed by daughter)
i-130 copy of approval ( by ex wife for 245(i)
I-485, I-485 A, I-765, I-864 W (**get a Social Security PEBES report of earning)
Perhaps someone can add VJ link to the how to I-485 sample study guide
I-693 (sealed medical).