Kiesel

21 hours ago, Stillwinning!!!😊 said:

Obviously it's best to disclose everything..than find out the consequences! Yes unauthorized work is forgiven..it just tells them you're honest but if you try to be sleek..you just never know..honesty is always the best policy!😊👍

how is unauthorized work forgiven?

Friends, I've been wondering, has anyone hired a lawyer only for the purpose of accompanying them to the AOS interview (not necessarily representing them or helping with filing the paperwork)?  

1 hour ago, 2020filer said:

Hi Everyone, just wanted to let you know that I am about to file my petition. I am so scared. The lawyer sent me the package today and I don't have any expertise to know if it's any good. I am so scared and nervous but I guess there is no other way to go from now.

You're brave and strong. If all docs are in place, go for it. We're all here to support you! Someone said a few days ago, doors are closed when we stop believing, so don't stop believing and have faith.  I'm yet to file, and I get my inspiration from this place.

27 minutes ago, silicon_valley said:

I am interested in getting a new psychological evaluation as soon as possible.

However, I don't have an attorney for my VAWA case, and some doctors don't want to have evaluation session with clients who don't have attorneys.

Can anyone recommend someone who are accepting independent clients?

I don't know anyone, but someone recommended in this forum to let the doctors know if you can't afford an attorney and they might be willing to accept you as a new client. Other resources that can help are non profit organizations. The hotline.org can direct you to resources in your areas. 

3 hours ago, HereOne said:

Then I suggest to be ready for plan B and filling for restarting order as well; the number that you have to call and things like that. I suggest to let them know (the VAWA hotline) that you are planing to leave. 

 

The more prepared you are, the less stress you go through and you will enjoy your freedom. 

good suggestion. my counselor told me to be prepared for anything at this stage. 

3 hours ago, Demise said:

If the package is too big they will generally put a slip in your PO Box and keep your package for a few days in the backroom.

 

If it's ready to be scheduled for an interview then it's most likely at the field office. You can find your field office by ZIP code here: https://www.uscis.gov/about-us/find-a-uscis-office/field-offices

 

Best to write to both the service center and to the field office requesting to hold the I-485. Worst case scenario one of those requests will be thrown in the trash.

Which one is the service center? NBC or Vermont? I haven't filed yet. Gotta finish my declaration and get through to the psychologist. 

4 hours ago, 2020filer said:

I personally didn't have big packages arrive to my PO box but I did ask people working there what happens if I receive one - they said they put in a slip in your box and keep the package in a separate room. 

That's good to know. I'll change my address to the PO box I got. Thank you!  

Friends, did anyone use a PO box only? What happens if your folder is returned and your PO box only accepts letters, not big packages? Anyone has experience in this? I read that USPS doesn't accept returned packages if the PO size is small

another question; how do I know where I-485 is sitting? the status is ready to be scheduled for an interview

3 hours ago, HereOne said:

- Financial resources to survive.

- If possible, get a restraining order. 

- Change your phone number. 

- Change all you passwords. 

- Spend your 100 to file VAWA (if you haven't already). It is really not complicated if you just follow the steps. 

 

- Start learning meditation and self-care (if you don't practice already). 

- Read books that help your mind and soul to empower you. 

- Never look back and be proud of yourself. 

- Surround yourself with positive people and things. 

Thanks for sharing your experience. I'm saving so I have enough to survive and I'm not in danger to file for a restraining order. Perhaps, if things get bad when I leave, then I'll get one. 

4 hours ago, Apolo said:

My experience was that once i left him, i feelth so relieved, and the first few days, it felt amazing, no fear, no anxiety about what may happen. One of my mistakes was that i didn't change my phone number and that i didn't file for a restraining order right away. Then again, my case was quite extensive, what i mean by that is that the abuse continued, and i had to file multiple restraining orders since he always violated them. He also hired a PI to find me and to continue to abuse and harassed me. Then again, then he also had like good moments, when he was saying how he was wrong and feel guilty for what he did and how sorry he is, but he never changed. He always went back to his mean and abusive behavior.  One advice that i def want you to follow if you can is. If something happens and he/she continue to abuse and harras, don't be afraid to file charges. I just recently filed charges, and that made hi stop. He went away for now. I didn't want to file charges because when you love someone, you always give them a chance, and you don't want to put them in jail or harm them, but just like a few police officers told me, and also the two judges and the states attorneys and the family center told me multiple times told me mine/your safety is important and if someone is trying to harm you that means that they don't care about you and /me/you have to do what you have to do to keep yourself safe even if it means that you have to press charges and to call the police not to be afraid. After i pressed final charges, he was warned by the judge that if he does it again, he will go to jail this time. So don't be afraid to protect yourself. 

Thank you for sharing your experience. I'm actually scared of leaving. One of my primary concern is losing my source of income, and I'm still not done writing my declaration. Still trying to get through to a psychologist too. I've reached a stage where I lost my confidence in my decisions. When did you file for divorce (before leaving or after leaving)?

Friends, anyone willing to share their experience with me when they decided to leave their abusive spouse and any potential pitfalls that I should be aware of ? Would really appreciate it  

21 hours ago, Fenix81 said:

Looks like I will have to send the 410 because I dont want to get back my application back again 

I think when they first sent you your EAD, there was a half page that you rip off and include with your renewal application. It says something around the lines of "use this tear-off portion of the page to speed up your extension or replacement card" did you include that as part of your renewal application?

6 hours ago, RoundRock said:

it takes about a month for them to send a rejection letter (VSC) mine submitted on 07/24/20 rejection on 09/14/20.

I did read the instructions again and they clearly say that c9 with AOS pending don't need to pay renewal fees

1 hour ago, Fenix81 said:

3 weeks ago on August 20 

Thanks for sharing  I hope that you don't have to pay fees for renewing your EAD.

52 minutes ago, Fenix81 said:

I sent the i-131 and I 765 with a all the documents and the pending I-485 and they just sent me the noa for the I 131 but they sent me the  I 765 back with a letter asking for the fees

I sent mine this week under C9. when did you send yours and how long did it take until you got the letter from them?

9 hours ago, dreamer1 said:

You can earn the money again but cannot earn back the time and peace 🤗 the longer you stay the more of yourself you will loose

True statement. Thank you for highlighting this point.  

13 hours ago, Stillwinning!!!😊 said:

Got you honey....listen to everyone here...in different words and voices..we're basically saying the same thing! Also you can not cling to a mistake just because you spent a lot of time making it! Seize opportunities as they don't come around often! A life of regret is beyond miserable! I trust you get the gist. You have all our support!❤😊👍

Thank you all for the support. This place has shown me more support and comfort than anyone else I talked to! you guys are  good people  

10 hours ago, Mish20 said:

@Kiesel A healthy hesitation is ok to make sure all is in order. But hesitation is a way for procrastination and sure regrets later. Can't have that!!!

Since you're on this forum, we all already know, that is the right path for you.

As soon as you feel like you have a clear mind, focus and get it done. (If it helps aim for deadline before the fees get higher in Oct). The relieve after you have filed is tremendous. Your only regret will be not to do it sooner!

I'm rooting for you!!!

you make a strong point. I know it;s the right path and that's why I'm here. Is it truly a relief when you file? I imagine stress until the application is approved. Thank you for rooting for me!!!

11 hours ago, Pinkrlion said:

I would not say hesitate, but I took my time gathering all of my evidence to make sure it was correct and valuable as proof of abuse.  

you're absolutely right. I should take my time to gather evidence and focus.  

11 hours ago, Stillwinning!!!😊 said:

Hey when you say hesitate, do you mean re-think or simply just wait a bit for no reason? The only hesitating you should be doing is while carefully gathering your evidences! Sometimes giving someone a second chance is like giving them a better angle to aim at you!🔫 run🏃 while you can! Also remember..if you have to shoot, shoot🔫 don't talk!

Mostly hesitate, but at times I re-think. I've risked everything to be with this person and invested everything into this marriage. I gave up my job, depleted all my savings, incurred debt mainly to live this with person. The economical costs are very high for me. With a joint property, it's even hard to simply walk away. The thought of starting from zero, the possibility of loosing all that money and effort that went into this marriage makes me think sometimes. I now know that many of my decisions were not wise or prudent, and I do have some regrets, but the encouragement I get here helps me move forward.  Like someone responded to me, this person did not care for my wellbeing, and I should not hesitate. 

12 hours ago, Engineering-rocks said:

Definitely is. You just have to realize that the abuser wasn't too worried about your wellbeing while doing all those hurtful things, so you shouldn't worry as well. Go for it and get what's yours!

Thank you for the encouragement! I spend over two year neglecting myself and pleasing someone else who did not care about my wellbeing. You're right, I should not hold back. 

22 hours ago, Dordor1 said:

Yikes. Any advise on how to fix something like this?

Don't lose hope, and I'm sorry. I did not want to say to scare you or make you worried. Your psychologist may have not copied, and could've written a good report based on the facts you shared with her/him. This might be of concern if your psychologist is not an immigration psychologist and is a very lazy one. 

11 hours ago, Dordor1 said:

Yikes. Any advise on how to fix something like this?

no idea honestly. I'd ask them to read, but not copy or maybe re-write/reorganize your declaration

45 minutes ago, Dordor1 said:

I did not know that personal declaration should not be shared with the person writing the psychological report. May I ask why guys?

They may copy what you wrote, and in some way it may not be objective I guess? I read this in earlier threads. Sandraj knows of multiple cases rejected because the psychologist copied the personal declaration. It's best if they hear from you and then write themselves. 

Friends, I know someone may have asked the same before, but is it normal to hesitate to file for VAWA?