TearsOfBabylon

Yet another point of view on how and why beneficiaries are ready to pack up and move
 
For me it's a question of prioritizing, and my top priority is my fiance's happiness. I know that I can find a job (almost) anywhere, I can adapt to (almost) any place, I can get on well with (almost) anyone, etc. It might sound too self-assured, but it's true. He, on the other hand, would be miserable in my country. He doesn't speak the language, which makes finding a job difficult, he would miss his family too much, and so on. That said, I could give a dozen of reasons why it would be hard or inconvenient for me to move but I choose not to focus on them, I put my fiance first.

I think it's that easy for the "easier" embassies like the UK, Germany, etc. basically embassies in countries with good relationships with the United States and countries with low Visa fraud rates.  I think the embassy workers for these countries feel like if you've gone through the process, had all of the background checks, paid all of the money and completed all of the paper work, that you're really committed to this, it's not for fraud, and really the interview is just a final quick check of the facts and to collect the beneficiary's passport.
 
One of the many reasons that my fiance moved from his home country to the United Kingdom was because we both knew that our future together depended on getting a Visa, either for a visit or to marry.  His home country, while a member of the EU, still does not enjoy the benefits of being a part of the Visa Waiver Program so for him to visit me, he was going to need to get a Visa.  However, his home country has a high rejection rate (around 35-45%) for all visa applicants, especially younger people who are trying to get a visa for travel.  His home country is also less than tolerant of LGBT people and relationships so the K-1/CR-1 route, we felt, would have been a very difficult battle for us.  Unfortunately, local customs sometimes come into play at the interview and, knowing how intolerant his country is of LGBT individuals, we were especially worried we would just go through this process and get denied because of that.  Now that he's in the United Kingdom and will have his K-1 interview there, we are a lot more hopeful about our future together.

Exactly. That's why I will still collect everything I can. And I will bring a load full to the interview, just to be prepared in case!
I just have a "better" feeling! 

The stories I've heard from the interviews are more like buying a train ticket situation. In my head it always was more like interrogation... but I keep hearing these "quick in - long wait - approved - out" stories.

Hard to believe it would be that easy... 

You totally sing my song!

When Eric's sister-in-law was interviewed in Ireland, they didn't even look at the financial documents - because her now husband used to be in the military (and Eric did too, for 8 years).
So, we assume that any military background should be helpful. However, we are not taking any chances and preparing everything we can. It's better to be safe than sorry

I did include a couple of screenshots with the longer durations of the calls (about 2 hours), I think it should be seen as a proof of a serious relationship. Let's face it, not every married couple spends that much time just talking Even if the interviewer wants to ask more questions, I won't mind answering. 

I agree with the beneficiary side, im the petitioner....but I hope you all relize that its pretty hard on us too.... yes no physical, yes no interview, or leaving ones original country...but I guess since i was military ive done it to a point and I understand its a choice. REMEMBER we are just as emotionally there as you are.. i dont remember the term some use for the pinay that get emotionally charged but I have to be calm even when she isnt...we miss and are going through this too....
 
Anyways looking forward to seeing for jan and feb scans..I like seeing how many cases a day..total number of cases outstanding for the months..to me it allows me to see how much closer we are getting.
 
Best luck to all we are all hopefully getting closer..cant wait to hold her hand again!

Anyone else seen 90 Day Fiancé? I know not everything is 100% legit on reality shows, but I do believe that the beneficiaries do have a really hard time coming to the US and getting really home sick.. I could not imagine packing up and leaving everything and moving to another country. In this case, it's not about any amount of money, but the fact that they are giving up their whole lives to start a new one with the one they love. I have asked my F quite a few times... are you sure you are ok with this (leaving all his friends and family) because I can only imagine how difficult that would be and it just makes me sad for him thinking about it and then I start to feel bad, but at the same time, I just can't wait to have him here with me. It's the worst catch 22 ever 

Yes I do agree it's hard on ALL beneficiaries and I sincerely feel at the USCIS level it's an even playing field for everyone but at the consulate level it isn't so if you look at/read people's experiences at the interview . It's quite common for a beneficiary from Nigeria, Morocco, India, my country, Afghanistan etc to be under more scrutiny at the interview/consulate level than a beneficiary coming from Norway, Switzerland, Finland. I am not blaming anyone just saying for All of US it's stressful and for some of us it is even more stressful because of where we come from. 

OK just need to vent real quick... (Thank god I'm not a January filer )! I'm finding it so comical and annoying that literally in less than a week I have been able to get a TEN YEAR tourist visa to my fiance's country. Previously I just obtained 1 month entry visa's for both visits, but needed to get a permanent one for future travels. My passport has been mailed to the 3rd party, handed over to the embassy for processing, reviewed by the embassy, and is now back on its way to be delivered to be by tomorrow. all within 5 days. Meanwhile, my fiance wanted to come visit but was told by multiple sources that we would just be wasting our money if he tried to apply for a tourist visa because there's a 99% chance he would've been denied.
 
Now here we are... engaged, madly in love and ready to start a family together, but no wait...you first have have to pay a large sum of money then wait over 3+ months just to get an approval on the first step of even getting an interview for the visa which may or may not then be approved depending on if your incredibly genuine, beautiful relationship looks good enough to a complete stranger! I totally understand the difference and get why, but man it still feels so frustrating! And it feels so unfair.  
 
That's my vent for the day. Thank you for reading, anonymous whiners club.

You totally sing my song!

Yes!  This forum is made for that - sometimes I just come read the different threads to just have a reality check that I am not a unicorn going through this journey alone! And I completely agree about the friends and family - they are supportive, but really it is hard for them to fully understand. 
 
I really hope that I get to be in the same AOS filers thread with you all one day! 
 
Congrats on the upcoming visit with your man and son!  That is very exciting and should hopefully help break up the wait.  I am trying to get to Peru in July - my fiances birthday is July 4th and I want to surprise him!!

Thanks God we have Vj and March filer thread, and the best of it we understand each other great, we are all different, some of us post often some not, but we all read it.
Even though I do not comment often I read every post here and it is lovely having this positive, ( ;-) some time whining as well) and supportive environment. Some times it is hard to explain even to our family and friends the fears, hopes, how we feel and what are we going through  on this journey.
 
Well now as I am  writing, I want to share with you, that my love bought ticket for him and his son as they are coming first week in june  can hardly wait.
He left  on 15th of Feb and it seems like eveeeeer
Hope this will be soon over and all of us will enjoy sharing life with our love ones.
 

I read it too and zipped my lip. Said to myself thank goodness the March bunch don't seem to care who says what and how often we whine or vent. Cause most people who not going through this process don't understand what it does to you mentally and emotionally with all the unknowns. So it's good to have the support here from people who "get it"

Good thing we are the Anonymous Whiners, and are constructive AND complaining!

 

Good thing we are the Anonymous Whiners, and are constructive AND complaining!

 

Gee I just read the January Filer Thread and someone there complained that those who do not post constructive help posts can go elsewhere that it was not a forum to complain or vent or talk about their day. No they are not a mod. They did not get much support though. lol Can you imagine if that person was on our thread. HAHAHA I am sorry but this forum and thread keeps me sane through the process and chatting with you all going through the process too helps tremendously. I enjoy hearing things and saying yes omg yes me too. Thanks to all the lovely March filers that keep our thread so wonderful no matter what we chat about. HUGS

My fiancee and I talk primarily through text during the week and just Skype on the weekends. I'll have to let her pick the screenshots because I'm the kind of person that would go through and pick out all the times we try and make patterns for each other out of emojis. We absolutely need our daily communication. We had a few days last week where she was not feeling well, took a nap after work, and slept mostly through our regular lunch time together. Those days were noticeably more difficult for me, and she admitted the same. I took a play from my mom's book and started sending holiday greeting cards. I'd never done that for anyone before and feel copies of those would serve as some evidence.

Giggling here at the comments/post about conversations we have as couples. I think many of us have convos that would make people blush. We did a lot of frontloading and man the convos and some of the pics were xxxxxx (#noshame. We all grown folks). We laughed so much at the thought of adjudicators and COs seeing some of the exchanges. Of course we left them out but it was like sifting for gold to find appropriate segments. Now we know we will be taking screenshots from March to interview time we have TRIED to tone it down.

lol if I did that, Scott would assume I'm drunk lol

LOL. No shame, I love it. I'm not gonna lie, it was extremely difficult to find "appropriate" messages when I was going through our old chats to provide screenshots with our packet. We joke about what if the CO at the embassy asks for his phone to go through messages and looks at our chats (I have a friend who went through India embassy for a visa recently and they went through his phone msgs/called people in his contacts) - they will be in for a surprise if they do but will definitely not be left with any doubts about our relationship being genuine lmao.  

Yeah, in your situation a good sence of humour is vital, and you sound like a perfect match

I have to add in addition to modern technology and communicating with our loved once this forum is also a sanity saver!! It really is nice to be able to talk to other going through a similar situation as you. There is my sap post for you all today
 
For our convos, we talk mostly throughout the day on FB messenger and then have nightly calls. I tried to find one a week that was more on the side of future plans or things like that - my basic rules for the screenshots were no cussing or saying "bad" things about USCIS lol 

I believe so for sure. I have never been married and he was married. He only got divorced two years ago because his ex-wife cheated on him which some guy online.  He said their marriage wasn't going well anyway because he was working all the time to try and keep the household going. I at the time of this happening had been his friend for a couple years and friends only. I was his confidant. He actually thought I was a lesbian because I was in an online relationship at the time with a person that used a female avatar online but was really a male in RL unbeknownst to anyone but me. lol So after their divorce we were still great friends and he would come online and tell me all about his rl dating woes and last year he said can we talk talk on voice. I said sure and the moment I heard his voice I knew I loved him. We talked about how we were both tired of dating and he said he would never ever get married again because it causes heartache. A week later we admitted we had had feelings for the last year or so of our friendship and started talking more and more and finally met and I knew the moment I met him that he was the one for me.
 
To be honest I never thought a relationship could be this wonderful. He completes me. My Mum loves him as do my brother and sister. My grandpa told me the other day when I visited him that he was so happy for me because Chris was a very nice guy and he could tell that after their big chat a couple months ago when they met. My grandpa is blind.

That's so sweet!

You'll be so happy together!