DaisyD

In the end I just took on extra baggage on the plane. The cost was not too much, but it was only me travelling so I did not have as much as I imagine you will with your family. But if there are extra things that you want to take with you and want to have immediately, check out how much each extra bag will be to take on the plane with you as it might be a good option. Even a couple of extra well packed bags can be really useful to have with you. Plus do not forget to use the full baggage allowance for your kid too, even though it is a child ticket, you get a full allotment of baggage space for him. Make sure you work out how to pack things very well so they do not get broken or take extra precious stuff as carry on if you can.

When I was that age a few of my friends found gap year programs that allowed them either to work at summer camps or to study at an american University. What does she want to do for the year? If she can work that out, then there may be a way to get someone to sponsor her trip. She should do some research on her options.

I am in Chicago, IL and tried to take the written test to get a permit yesterday and was rejected because they would not accept my extension letter. I am currently rethinking my strategy. They suggested I drive on my foreign license even when I pointed out that would be illegal as I have been a resident of the city for more than 90 days. I hope to get something sorted as I want to buy a car, but can only imagine that it will be 100 times more complicated with a foreign license and the insurance will probably be insane because I do not have a state issued license.

I like everything you said but that line. How would that fair for her marriage if she starves the man's child in his house? What kind of mother will starve a child as punishment. Going that route will only destroy her marriage.

If the kid is problematic, let the dad resolve it period.

I am not talking about starving the child. The child should be perfectly capable of sorting out a meal for themselves (which I mentioned in my last post if you read carefully enough) and if not, the child has a biological parent (their father) that the live with who needs to step up and do his role in parenting and cook for his own kid. He should also be stepping up in his husband role and teaching his children how to be respectful towards adults. A father who does not teach his children to respect his wife and who does not do the parenting in his house is the one who will destroy his marriage. If the kid is problematic, the father can cook for them, clean for them and run around after them.

I am a step mom who looks after her step kid full time. I have no contact with the kids mother. I have no need to. You have no need to be in contact with the kids mother.

You do not need a lawyer to get the ex out of your life. You have the power to do that for yourself and for free. Block her in your phone (and email if needed), do not message her, do not call her. Do not be in the same place as her or talk to her unless you absolutely have to, and even then keep it brief and polite. Your husband needs to deal with his ex himself when they need to talk about kid related stuff.

Your husband also needs to talk to his kid that if the child has a problem with you then they need to either talk to you or talk to him and they will discuss it (even if it is just dad telling the kid, tough luck, you are not an adult). The child also needs appropriate punishments for being disrespectful. If the child continues to disrespect you and go behind your back telling tales to their mother, then stop doing things for the child. Stop cooking for that child, stop doing their laundry and start making them wash their own dishes. People who are disrespectful towards you do not deserve your time and attention. If the child is old enough for a cell phone they are old enough to fix themselves something to eat, use a washer and a dryer and wash up some dishes.

Being a step parent is one of the toughest things I have had to deal with. Get some support. I have found some online step parent forums to be invaluable in learning how to stay sane while trying to deal with having someone elses kids in my life.

As well as rent do not forget that you will need a security deposit. This can vary from 1 - 3 months rent depending on where you are and what you rent. Also you can check if there are any furnished apartments available which might not be a bad idea if you are starting from scratch, that way you do not need to buy everything at once. Though lots of things can be gotten fairly cheaply from craigslist or thrift stores. Different cities have different websites to use for housing, but I would suggest doing some research on craigslist as a good place to see what rents might cost and what kind of jobs are available in your area. Also if you are in a big city and can avoid having a car that will save you a lot of money (though it may limit your job search area). Also remember to bring clothes to wear to interviews.

If possible arrange to stay with family or friends (or a hostel/hotel) for at least the first 2 weeks so that you can go and look at apartments in person so that you get a good idea of what is available to rent and the areas and avoid online scams. Alternatively if you do have contacts in the area that you trust and that are willing to help, ask them to look for an apartment for you so that it is ready when you arrive.

I missed my connecting flight when I first entered the country after being approved, but the airline I was with allowed me to transfer onto a later flight without any issues. Call the airline and see what their policy is if you miss the connection.

Get the train?

I think that your evidence shows a good range of factual information to show that your lives are intertwined. If I were you I would not worry about it. I sent probably not as much evidence as you have, but I thought that it was a reasonable amount to prove my marriage is legitimate. In my opinion I am already here, living with my husband and if they decide that I need to send more evidence, then I will. If my application is delayed because of it, it has no real effect on my life (unlike when I was applying for my K1 visa and was living in a different country to my then fiance). So I am happy to wait and not worry about it because I know that it will all work out in the end.

Glad it went so well. Hopefully your post will help someone else if they are in a similar situation.

I worry a lot and did not want to be without insurance. My husbands insurance would only cover me once we were married. So I bought a temporary policy that covered me for 3 months from an insurance company I found online that specialize in insurance for visitors to the USA. It cost me $222 for 3 months cover back in 2013. I am sure there are other places you could buy it from if you wanted.

In the end I did not need it, but I would always rather be covered than not and the policy was pretty cheap for insurance.

If you have your state issued ID or DL, there is no need to carry EAD or SSN card or GC for your everyday life. It's absolutely not necessary to have SSN, EAD or GC in your wallet / purse. You'll regret if you lose it.

You only need to carry GC if you are boarding a plane or something more important as getting a loan.

Showing your GC as a proof of ID while waiting to get your ID or DL, it's definitely OK. There is nothing wrong with that except don't lose it. Use the paper pouch that comes with the card to shield from RFID readers from the crowd. Or use an Alunimum wallet to provide a better security from RFID readers from the crowd.

Anyone who gives you a condescending tone for showing your GC due to your immigration status, tell them you work and pays taxes and you are legally allowed by the Federal Government in this soil. If he/she doesn't like the fact, tell them to petition to the Government.

It is a legal requirement to carry your green card with you at all times when in the US. Sure, most of the time you should not need it, especially if you have other ID, but when you do not have it you are liable to a fine and/or time served in jail.

when did you get your NOA1? we are having a problem about our mailing address I forgot to change my address the last time we moved in Colorado. now we are in newyork and don't know how long we are going to stay here maybe more weeks or more months..haizzt I just change our address today using my inlaws address instead the address here. do you think it is fine?

I do not know the answer to this I am afraid. I would call USCIS and ask them which address would be best to use and the best way to update your address with them.

I received my NOA1 on about January 11th I think.

My green card expired on Jan 16th this year I mailed my i-751on Jan 5th, used usps next day delivery and they received it the very next day Jan 6th and I had my NOA1 in my hands with the one year extension less than a week later.

I am the kind of person that does stuff a lot last minute (not something I am proud of, just a fact) so I just made sure that I had a range of evidence in my i-751 ensuring that the minimum was included (copy of green card, completed form, cover letter and check) together with the evidence that I could get hold of easily. Then just told myself that if they need extra evidence, they can just request it. It will not be the end of the world.

I put in:

1 copy of a bank statement for our savings account

1 copy of a check for our checking account showing both our names

print outs of my husbands health and life insurance showing me as a beneficiary

copy of our rental agreement for our apartment showing both of our names

a copy of a document showing joint ownership of a property we bought

and a copy of our boarding passes for a vacation we took together in the summer

I am sure that many others would put in tons more stuff (I saw someone on here say the put in 250 pages) but to me the evidence that I put in seems reasonable and if they want more they can ask and I can send it in at a later date or take it to an interview. Also fyi, if you really cannot get hold of any evidence quickly when I received my noa1 it does note that I could send any extra evidence that I think will help my case to them, so if you wanted you could follow up the initial evidence with your i-751 with some extra evidence after you get your noa1 if you needed a little extra time.

We used a local firm btw who were part of Beakins. On the whole the experience was ok. Everything arrived in one piece as far as I remember. Getting a final packing and delivery date was a bit last minute (but I think this is the same for any moving firm, especially as we went long distance from Oregon to Chicago). Getting hold of someone was a pain, but I think that was more due to our local office than Beakins themselves. The final cost was slightly more than the estimate, mainly because of the number of boxes used and because they had to move our stuff from the big truck that it was transported in across the States, to a smaller one so that they could access our property (look out for all the extras). We did get a slightly cheaper quote from another firm, but chose to go with Beakins because we trusted their sales guy more, not sure if that was the right move in the end, but it probably did not make much of a difference.

I hate moving, and having someone else pack everything up and move it and deliver it for us was really nice even if some parts were slightly stressful or annoying (living for a couple of weeks without most of our things).

Just find 3 or 4 local moving companies and get estimates from them. Some local firms have partnerships with national firms. We found estimates can vary widely so it is worth spending the time to get the estimates as well as talking to the firms to see which ones you trust more to move your belongings. Also beware to check the cost of all the extras: boxes and packing etc. It is very convenient to get someone else to do it all, but the cost adds up and the packers, although good, do not always pack things in the most space efficient ways. If you have the time, most companies allow you to pack things yourself, although they will not cover you for insurance for breakages.

That would need fairly substantial savings.

You are no longer a UK Resident which impacts NHS coverage.

Nothing is cheap about a transatlantic relationship. Weighing up the best option, in my mind means thinking through all the possibilities.

By moving back to the UK to live, the OP and her husband would be residents. The suggestion from others of going back for pregnancy tourism to have the baby there and stay a couple of months before returning is not in my mind being a resident. In all reality, the NHS is unlikely to send a bill even if they are entitled to (and any bill would be substantially less than an out of pocket medical expenses paid in the US).

Send your daughter to live in Spain with her father. Then see how long it takes him to send her back to you with permission to immigrate.

I know that this is said in jest, but in all reality considering having the child live with her father is not a bad idea. It is an option that should be put on the table and considered as rationally as possible.

I would try to delve further into why he is blocking this. Is he scared that he is no longer going to be a father figure? Does he feel ousted by the presence of a potential step-dad? Is he worried that he will see less of his child? Are the flights more expensive from US to Spain so he is worried about expenses? Does he speak/read well in English, if not, does the thought of sorting out legal issues with a US court worry him? Does he have a bad image of the US culture and not want his child brought up that way?

If you can work out what his main issues are then you and your wife can work out how you can compromise with him, reassure him or sweeten the deal a little for him so that he is more willing to give his permission. If the child visits her father (or his family) at all, it is probably best that he is on board rather than risking him not sending the child back after visitation because he does not agree with her living in the US.

Another option is to wait until you get your citizenship, move back to the UK with your husband. Have your kids there, then if you both want, move back to the US. Seems a convoluted option but it is still an option to add to the list.

I had a really tough first year in the US. And even now (2.5 years here) I am not fully integrated, I know I could do more but it is a slow process for me. I have no job, few friends and rarely leave the house unless I absolutely have to. But I would not move back to the UK without my husband. He is the reason I am here and the reason that being here is absolutely the right choice for me. If I can give you one piece of advice it is to focus on your fiance, talk to him, let him know how you are feeling and work on your relationship with him. That should be your top priority in my opinion.

I am here to tell you that even if you do not make many friends, do not get a job and do not find lots of hobbies to keep you occupied, it is ok. You will not have failed. You will be just fine, because you will be with the love of your life. All of the advice on how to do that stuff is great, and definitely worth pursuing. But if it does not work out, do not beat yourself up. Take the small victories, the small steps in progress and give yourself permission to take things at your own pace.

The first year is going to be tough, you and your fiance need to be prepared for downs as well as the ups. I know for me the paperwork, the uncertainty of dates, leaving family and friends and a way of life behind all took its toll before I even moved. Plus on top of that you are getting married...that is a huge life event. Throw into that the fact that your wedding will probably not be how you always imagined it would be (I wanted a big family wedding, which is not possible when get married thousands of miles away from home) and you will have less than 90 days to organize it (most stressful thing ever- make sure to book a honeymoon, you will need it). Then you are about to move in with your partner probably for the first time and have to try to adjust to each other as a cohabiting couple. On top of that I also found that my husbands family were very different to mine and I found that alienating and it emphasized my homesickness even more. I also had my husbands crazy ex wife to deal with who was harassing me and trying to sabotage our marriage, oh and getting used to being a step mom to a young girl. Then of course there is the cultural shock. Oh, and my husband and I also found that we had very little in common that we could do together. Plus all the firsts being abroad were tough to deal with...first birthday away from family, first chirstmas away, first thanksgiving (surprisingly this was really tough, it made me feel really homesick to be away from my family and surrounded by a different family who seemed indifferent to me even if it is a holiday that I do not care about in any form).

You need to talk all of this through with your fiance. Make sure that the two of you know that life is going to be rocky. Just because you have a visa in your passport, does not mean that the road ahead is paved with gold. He needs to be there to support you and try his hardest to make you feel like you have a new home. (I loved the fact that my husband chose Philip Philips Home for our first dance at our wedding, it still speaks a lot to me

). His life is going to change too, and he has to be prepared to put time and effort into your relationship and into helping you to settle in and adjust how he lives to make it work for the two of you. You are both still on a roller coaster and need to hold onto each other in order to make it though the next few loops and twists together.

The way we coped was not perfect but it got us through. At first we did a lot of going out, getting drunk bonding through that. I let my emotions come out when I was drunk. It was not the best way, but it was cathartic on occasions. Sometimes I was a b**ch to live with, my emotions were all over the place. But we always made up and always worked out a solution afterwards, together. Later on we started to discover (sober) actives that we could do together (we were spending too much money drinking, plus it was not very healthy). We got into making art together, playing board games, he introduced me to some video games and we took long walks. We planned nice trips away to different cities to keep an event in the future that we could look forward to. We also talked constantly and openly about what was going on and each made an effort to adjust. After about a year or so my emotions leveled out and things got better as time went on. Relationships are about trying to find the happy middle ground you are both going to have to work hard to make it work and have the commitment to see it though all of the changes that are happening to you both.

It is not that I wish any of this bad stuff on you, just giving you a realistic look at what my first year was like so that you are prepared. You can make it through this. I just wanted you to be aware that there will be times that things do not go as planned and life seems tough and you will question your move but that is ok and if you work together with your fiance life will get better.

Thanks everyone. That has made me feel better.

I'm traveling to Puerto Rico in a couple of days and I can't find my passport. I'm pulling the house apart trying to find it. Can anyone let me know if I will be ok travelling with only my Green card? I'm beginning to panic over here.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/03/03/robert-duncan-marijuana_n_4877072.html

He did consult a lawyer and figured everything was good, and then this happened to him.

Thanks for the link, this is the kind of worst case scenario I was thinking could happen but wasn't certain it was the case.

USCIS goes by federal law, so local law might be in conflict. I tend to think it would be okay, but since it is selling drugs you might want to run it by a lawyer.

The conflict in the laws is my concern. To be clear the position is not directly involved with the sale of the marijuana but of course that is how the business makes money.