jenkatx

Seriously, what is he hurting you? I am pretty sure poster was not posting this information for you personally.

Seriously, what is he hurting you? I am pretty sure poster was not posting this information for you personally.

I appreciate the update "Pushbrk" but my time line has already taken care of that aspect. I am under the impression that a ticker can be used informally by any member on VJ. Thanks again but unless it violates the TOS i'll like mine to remain just that...NOA3!

I came here as an immigrant myself from Germany and recently someone asked me : So why did you come here, was it because you wanted to make a better life for yourself ?
Heck no it wasn't. My life was fine.
I felt insulted and shocked.
Granted Nigeria is a high fraud country and Germany isn't but for a moment I felt what genuine Nigerians feel....the condescending remarks get old. Real old.
Though I believe the people saying this to you do it because they are concerned about you and want you to do the right thing, the right thing they would do is not your right thing. Do your thing...lol. It's your life.
When friends and family make those remarks to me I respond depending on the situation/person :
1. Don't stereotype. Period.
2. I am capable of making my own choices and accepting the consequences of the outcome,the good, the bad and the ugly.
3. Why, don't you think I got it going on enough to keep my man ? Rather insulting !
4. Thank you for your advice, I know you mean well but you are now beating a dead horse and my mind is made up.
5. I thought it through, did my research, know my man and this subject is now closed from here on. Either support me or don't. Subject done. Conversation over. Would you like some tea ?
Try responding with the answers confidently and they will soon stop. Never discuss adjustment problems with them but find supportive friends who know what's up and are supportive or else you will hear " I told you so's" for every little thing.
It is just one of the little baggage deals that comes with the package.
By the way, over here we have scammers with brief cases, CEO's and politicians dressed in Italian suits and bankers and hedge fund 3 ring circus acrobats. Drum roll

HARMONY2012, you have never truck me the type that cares what others say or think! With that said, I feel you my friend. People talk and make judgments, but at the end of the day, it is you who has to go home to that person you have chosen to spend your life with and not them.
Marriage is hard work if anyone wants it to work. Yes, there is a chance of the marriage of not working. That chance exists with any marriage, culture, race and religion. NOT just by marrying a NIGERIAN!!!
Here on VJ, we have all read stories from all over the world with spouses, or fiances coming here and then leaving the petitioners. We hear the story from one side, not saying it is not true, but it takes two to make any relationship work.
I am at the point where I just don't listen to negative comments, I look forward and look forward to someday being with my man for whatever length of time I have with him. Life is too short, and if in our life we have experienced the glow that true love and happiness brings? then it is worth it all regardless of what others say or what happens five or ten years down the road.
God grant you all the joy and happiness you seek and deserve.

Better to have loved. And lost then to never have loved at all. I have heard the comments too. My fiaance is Nigerian and i say let them talk. i loved him with every fiber of my being and he loves me. i pray that things will work out but if not, i had a great love anyway!

Do Not give up..I was asked the very same questions when I did mine 3 months ago and was told to come back with call records and more pics...I did as they asked and on my second interview the very same day your fiance did hers..I was approved..they hardly looked at the stuff..So pleeeeease do not loose hope it will work out!

Nigeria is the hell of consulates. Unlike other contries where visas are handed out like candy Nigeria will deny people on flimsy excuses with packages loaded with evidence of a bonafide relationship. They are truely on their own unrestrained power trip at the expense of legitamate couples.

back story: came to the states in 2001 from Nigeria (was 12), haven't gone back since then. in my 3rd year of college now, i met my wife in 2007 at a cancer walk. in June 2010 i asked her to marry me, we got wedded this April and filed off the apps(i-130, i-485, i-765, i-864) in June.
the interview was scheduled for 10am at the charleston center south carolina, the same place i got my biometrics done, we got there around 8:30am, there were other couples there already. we had our photo album and a binder with all the documents we filed (including supporting documents all labeled and ready to go). a little over 9:25am our IO (late 40's african american) called my first name (i guess he couldn't pronounce my last lol) and walked us to his office where he asked us (my wife and I) to stand and take the oath. after that we both sat and he started off asking us both for our ID's, he asked for all my traveling documents including my i-94, SSN and my EAD card, which i presented to him then he proceeded to ask my wife some questions. he asked her what her full name was, and her current address (all the while, he was browsing through all the initial documents we sent in when we filed including the RFE for i-864). after that he asked me my name and my current address then the name of the person who was joint sponsoring us, I answered him. he was marking up the files with a red pen (check marks).
after a moment of silence (well my wife and i where shattering about what to name our newly adopted pet LOL), he proceeded to ask me some of the questions from the i-485 form, which i answered no to all of them, he asked if i was working? which was a no...he also asked if i was in school, i told him no but i will be attending next spring semester. after that he asked us how we met, my wife and I spoke at the same time, and we all laughed (the first time he laughed) but she took the lead and told him the story. he seemed satisfied, he asked us to see our album, which i presented to him. while he was browsing it, my wife and i watched along and made jokes about how clean our apartment was in the picture. the IO was cheerful, midway through the album (he already saw the wedding ceremony pics) he made a joke that he'll not finish looking at the albums today if he continued (big album!!). he closed it up and handed it to me, upon that he asked if there were any other evidence ill like to show him? i told him, everything we have he already has in front of him except for our renewed apartment lease and auto insurance. he said ok and after 5 minutes of him going over our file, he said "well, you are approved!" he stamped my passport took my EAD card (gave back my drivers license ss card and passport) and proceeded to explain how to remove the 2 year condition restriction and what forms to file. afterwards he said that i should expect my card in the mail in 3-4weeks, then asked us to go out the way we came in and to wait in the front boot! in all, the interview lasted about 20 minutes
i just want to say thank GOD and thank you to this site, i did it with out a lawyer and if it wasn't for some members on here, i don't know where ill be now (in regards to filing)

AwWw...See you didnt even waist time to send them right back the information they are looking for.....You guys will be fine...
This is the time to put your whole trust in God because he is the one really in total control....He is a faithful God and WILL get you guys through this.
GoodLuck!

Their site(s) have estimating tools by distance and speed of delivery. You may want to be sitting down when you find out the price.

Congratulation my dear friend for all your accomplishments thus far, and I celebrate your courage and determination. Best of luck in bringing your 9ja man home.

FORCED TO DEAL WITH is what we have to change to be able to get our loved ones here. Specially for those of us who are not with them as we speak due to those FORCED flaws.
I am happy for the ones that have their loved ones with them, but would like to see each one of us have the same opportunity in fairness.
Thanks

All I have been saying thus far is "the USCIS needs to put all their requirements in writing on their website". If we, white women or black or asian and etc. and older or not, if we can't marry a Nigerian, or a black man from Africa, then tell us. DON'T make our lives a living hell, after the fact!
Make the information available online on the USCIS website. Why wait to question the beneficiary "why he or she is marrying a white man or woman during the interview?". Why? did they not see the pictures sent to them with the forms? did they not approve the application themselves prior to forwarding it abroad??
This is ridicules system. I agree, they wouldn't put it in writing for it is out right discrimination however you look at it, and what is said behind closed doors in an interview becomes very hard to be challenged. Specially, when a CO is treated like a god and has so much power.

While race may be something they want to poke at there are appropriate questions to ask and ones that are totally inappropriate. Asking if race has been an issues with family members / parents may be ok. Asking if you father died because you are marrying a white woman is way out of boounds. Just because these people are consular officers does not give them the right to treat others like they are trash.

Well aren't the embassy interviewers american folk (I assume white men and women)? It seems to be more an american white woman/black man thang all over again.
I can attest to the fact they love foreigners and whites here so much so they would love to kidnap you also cuz well america means money to they wicked here. I have had two attempts on me. I no longer go out. I came here for two month visit it is now going on 5 1/2 months. As a ligt skinned black woman no on sees me as a black person but white. Here in my neighborhood I am the "white visitor" and all ask about my comings and goings. I wait in no lines I mean they literally come and will pull me out of line and take me to the front of the line (scary but interesting and no one complains).
I feel letters are in order we need to start a grassroots petition and load up and send to all our senators and congress people. Cuz in the US you scream discrimination they will halt and look and no person in office wants to be seen like they are prejudice. This is blatant bull #######. Let's make some noise people.
I have not filed my papers yet will do that when I return August 30th and personally I will storm the dang embassy if they even hint of discrimination. I don't care if you are white, black, green or monkey tan. You married who you married that is your business. See now you got me mad. we need to alert and protect the ones like me who are beginning their journey and make sure they are legitimately denied like.

We STILL are in context and the context is coming from a place of experiencing hurdles unlike some who have not experienced them, so your double standard does not apply. If you can talk about all I want is MY hurdles cleared, then I can comment and say heck yes I do and I want fraud stopped too. Just because you deem that impossible doesn't make it so.
As I was saying we do want obstacles removed and I am certain so did you to be successful in your visa journey.Who in their right mind wouldn't ?
We can multitask commenting about our hurdles AND still have empathy for those who were blocked by hurdles in the system AND still discuss to keep fraud out. One does not negate the other in the motivation for discussion. That is the reason this thread was started. Pedantically insisting adhering to a system that others clearly identify as broken and not seeing its faults as it is now, gives me reason to believe you never encountered hurdles that blocked your visa journey or you are perhaps a bit less creative to innovate better ideas for change and improvement. However, I don't know the facts of YOUR journey, therefore I will refrain from my "gut feeling." I walk my talk.Point made.
What government agency is perfect ? It seems it is you that is not interested to deviate from any existing archaic regulation or lack of it. To you the system is not broken and should remain as it is. Perhaps the point for you is mute and there is nothing else to say here for you ?
Still laughing at the "They just want the obstacles removed so they can get what THEY want" remark, who wouldn't ? Except for the little word "just" in that sentence, which renders it shallow and shows me attitude. Have the same people not been commenting with specific ideas on how to stop fraud AND get what they seek after, which is their loved one here ? You think one can't be done without the other, or what is your point. Your reasoning is getting confusing and slightly leaning towards an argumentative mode for the sake of needing to be right. It's not about right or wrong, it's about sharing ideas and if they seem not workable to you then it can be stated with a decent attitude without making it personal by saying They JUST want what they want, that is what derailed the core of the ideas. Lighten up ! It's ok to not be viewed as being correct every time by everybody, really.

There are two basic groups of fraudulent relatinships , both with the same goal getting into the US on the back of someone already here. There are two very distinct methods of handling them ( or not caring ) One method also blocks a lot of valid coules the other turns a more or less blind eye. The biggest difference in these petitions is the sex and skin color of the beneficary. It would seem is you are female and being petitioned by a white male you get in and don;t have too much to worry about. If you are male of darker skin you are going through the gates of hell to get in . A VJ timeline search for Nigeria with interview dates from Jan 1 to Aug 1 for Nigeria shows 31 records and 17 approvals ( 54 % ) Other gates from hell embassies for men are also located in the MENA and other African countries. Free pass countries for both sexes usually deal with places where the immigrant is white. The other area where you hear a lot of cries of " she arrived and ran off " or " she came and accused me of abuse and threw me out of the house" involve white men petitioning for non white women. It would seem that embassy level screening is heavily based on sex and skin color and on a notion that there is a need to protect Amercian women from men of color. Even though there is fair evidence that fraud is also high in another visa pairing ( white men / non white women) the visa is granted and the fraudster is allowed into the US and usually allowed to remain. To make the process more fair and equal the idea that woman are less capable of chosing a partner needs to be abolished. People have mentioned that the DV lottery seems less fraud prone ( maybe because of lack of knowledge) These visa are based on a set of requirements, you meet them and you get a visa. There is no set list for family based petitions. Maybe such a set of requirements are needed, Number of visits, number of days together, educational level , common language. Take away the ability of a CO to deny based on feelings and make them provide evidence that is shared with the petitioner and allow the petitioner a fair chance to refute the claim or consur and walk. End the vauge "not a bonefide relationship " and require actual cause(s) for the rejection. If the embassy has found that there are undisclosed marriages, criminal history, work in the sex industry disclose it to the petitioner. Make a check list for a petitioner to know what is needed to get approval ( not just of the petition but of the visa ) If there are regional specific rules ( like CFO ) make it part of the check lists. A CO will be seeing a string of apllicants in a day and doesn't know the person anywhere near as well as the person that filed the petition yet they have the power to dash a couples dreams in minutes. Make the CO accountable when they do decide to throw someones future to the dust wrongly.

Completely & totally. There is no more need to continue with this topic as no one can agree upon the color of the sky even. I will be re-posting something similar in regards to the Lagos or Sub Saharan process. I would like to think that people who do not deal with that type of embassy do not understand, however I feel that that is truly not the case. Some people are simply content to know the system & how to work it, while some feel the need to correct the injustice in that system. That was the point of this thread, to look for ideas to fix the problems in the process. Sadly we little more the 11 pages of one-upmanship.

With psyco Lagos you can never be sure of what will happen. First time you were found not not have a bonafide relationship, you make USCIS happy so your petition goes back to Lagos. At the interview they ask your spouse if your street is north to south or east to west and how many window are in the livingroom. Your spouse gets the answer wrong and they redeny it . ( yes there has been denials in Lagos for not knowing details of the USC's home layout ) Forget that your spouse has never been to the US . Hopefully this doens't happen but that is how absurd it can be. \\

Unbelievable.

Agree with pushbrk on the compensation part, but the idea of being able to drag some unaccountable COs back to the U.S. in chains for "abuse of a U.S. citizen" has some appeal, if there were a legal avenue therefor. Sadly, the consulates are almost completely untouchable.

I think that you are sadly right on many of these points. Particularly knowing the culture of our loved one. It shocks me how some of us have taken no time to research and understand were our SO is from. Not everyone fits into the societal norm but it is a good starting place. At the least it will give one the right questions to ask. On that note a lot of the duty to detect fraud is on us as the petitioner.
I do however believe it is the responsibility of the government to send back someone who is later found out to be fraudulent. On the petitioners dime if required even.
Seconded.

We had a similar situation with my husband. His birth certificate says John Mark Doe, but his passport that is four years old says Mark John Doe. We applied for the visa using the birth certificate name John Mark Doe, but USCIS changed it to be what the passport says Mark John Doe, and this is how we've been submittign all of his paper work since. I believe that the visa and the passport should be in synch so there are no issues when you travel. They understand that in Nigeria people flip flop these names and it is no big issue.