Immigrant spouses vs. American Spouses

[Sharon Austin 0]

I was in class last week discussing political views on our immigration system here in the U.S., with men and women petitioning relatives especially fiancees to enter the U.S. Some of the outspoken opinions were very mannerable and calm, while majority of the others were choatic and harsh. For example, one woman stated that, "men should not be able to bring a woman in from another country because all they want is slaves, the 60's and 50's are long gone!" So to get our mines off our fiancees for a little bit if we can, lol, I welcome your insight on this particular view?

Thanks,

Austin

[DARUMA07 25]

Austin,

I chose To find a woman out of this country because of my past experiences with women here after my wife had died. I am not saying that all US women are not compatible with me, because that would be far from the truth! I happen to find a Beautiful Filpina woman who is younger than me, but very Mature! I chose Ruchie because of the way she Loves and Respects me as a mate! Her Cooking and Household Skills have nothing at all to do with it!!! I wasn't looking for a maid nor a slave.... I was looking for a woman that I could share my life with!!!!

Most of us American men know how to do cooking, cleaning, laundry and etc. around the house! So why would anyone think that we are just looking for a slave! There seems to be a misconception from the American People on why we bring our Loved Ones here to the states! As all of us know on VJ.... Love is Universal and no matter how many miles across the oceans, some of us will find that special someone we want to share our lives with!!

These people are the ones who will die alone and unhappy! They can have their opinions, but I will have My Ruchie and be Happy for the rest of my life! I stand very Proud of my decision to fall in-love and bring a foreign fiancee to the USA... By the way, GOOD LUCK TO THE REST OF VJ'S COUPLES WHO ARE STILL PROCESSING THEIR VISA'S OR WHO ARE ALREADY HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Kez/JWolf 6]

These people are the ones who will die alone and unhappy! They can have their opinions, but I will have My Ruchie and be Happy for the rest of my life!

Sadly she will die alone and unhappy with no family here to look after her in her later years after you have died a happy man.....

Just another way to look at things......

Kez

[babybunny 2]

I married international because, I am a sucker for a sexy booty and an accent.

[babybunny 2]

So why would anyone think that we are just looking for a slave!

is there an element of truth?

[Sharon Austin 0]

Austin,

I chose To find a woman out of this country because of my past experiences with women here after my wife had died. I am not saying that all US women are not compatible with me, because that would be far from the truth! I happen to find a Beautiful Filpina woman who is younger than me, but very Mature! I chose Ruchie because of the way she Loves and Respects me as a mate! Her Cooking and Household Skills have nothing at all to do with it!!! I wasn't looking for a maid nor a slave.... I was looking for a woman that I could share my life with!!!!

Most of us American men know how to do cooking, cleaning, laundry and etc. around the house! So why would anyone think that we are just looking for a slave! There seems to be a misconception from the American People on why we bring our Loved Ones here to the states! As all of us know on VJ.... Love is Universal and no matter how many miles across the oceans, some of us will find that special someone we want to share our lives with!!

These people are the ones who will die alone and unhappy! They can have their opinions, but I will have My Ruchie and be Happy for the rest of my life! I stand very Proud of my decision to fall in-love and bring a foreign fiancee to the USA... By the way, GOOD LUCK TO THE REST OF VJ'S COUPLES WHO ARE STILL PROCESSING THEIR VISA'S OR WHO ARE ALREADY HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well put Dannyboy, I completely agree, these same views and issues came from a feminist congresswoman who put in place the IMBRA to limit some of the petitions that are being processed. To be completely honest, I know I truely love my future wife to be so committed with very great distances between us, I've been married before while in the military and it just didn't work out because our personalities were so different, I was the reserved and calm one and she was the agressor, she was also filipina but she was american born like my father says she didn't have the true values that filipinas carry amongst themselves. God placed you on this earth to live life abundantly and to enjoy your life to the fullest, so guess thats what we are going to do!

[DARUMA07 25]

So why would anyone think that we are just looking for a slave!

is there an element of truth?

NO! That is just Ruchie keeping me inline after I failed to clean the bathroom to her expectations!! HEHEHEHE!

[Sharon Austin 0]

So why would anyone think that we are just looking for a slave!

is there an element of truth?

NO! That is just Ruchie keeping me inline after I failed to clean the bathroom to her expectations!! HEHEHEHE!

Its going to be an adjustment, but thats an adjustment we both want to accept!

[DARUMA07 25]

So why would anyone think that we are just looking for a slave!

is there an element of truth?

NO! That is just Ruchie keeping me inline after I failed to clean the bathroom to her expectations!! HEHEHEHE!

Its going to be an adjustment, but thats an adjustment we both want to accept!

Amen Brother!!!

[Scott & Lai 12]

I was in class last week discussing political views on our immigration system here in the U.S., with men and women petitioning relatives especially fiancees to enter the U.S. Some of the outspoken opinions were very mannerable and calm, while majority of the others were choatic and harsh. For example, one woman stated that, "men should not be able to bring a woman in from another country because all they want is slaves, the 60's and 50's are long gone!" So to get our mines off our fiancees for a little bit if we can, lol, I welcome your insight on this particular view?

Thanks,

Austin

I guess we're supposed to respect non-American cultures unless they are more traditional/conservative than ours, and men who have a more traditional view of the role of men and women in marriage aren't allowed to marry

[JoeMama 0]

I don't mind joining in on this debate. It will more than likely piss some people off. But hey, it's not your life and just text on a computer screen. What brought me to the decision of choosing to want an immigrant wife, was plain and simple. After being married for 11 years, I went on enough dates after the divorce which each date felt more like an interview for a home loan. My finances were none of their business to inquire about on a first date. I don't like 95% of the American woman and how society has taught that embracing being feminine is a weakness. And it has basically been throw away with materialism being replaced as more of a moral value. Too many women I've observed, have adapted the attitudes, physical, and personality characteristics that are too masuline for my taste. It's not attractive to me. I love women and all they were truly blessed being born as a true woman. Not trying to morph into men. Now, don't think that I have no respect for women. I'm a single father with 3 daughters. But also, I am an admirer of beauty in the opposite sex. I'm honest and I will tell you that I don't see that much here. At least where I live. Most women I encounter don't deny that they seek a man with the looks of Brad Pitt and the wealth of Bill Gates. I do fine financially taking care of my girls and myself and I'm well within my BMI (Body Mass Index). Obviously, I don't have the face of a movie star. And I'm fine with that. It's not a problem. But the qualities of my moral fiber are not important to those who are looking for a good man to share their life. So, I decided to look elsewhere outside the USA. Ukraine is where I ended up. I love seeing women who treasure being a woman in every way and don't feel as though they have to compete with a man to prove some kind of point. I never impressed my fiancee' with any of my financial information. Which she's NEVER asked me about my income, credit score, or the material possessions I have in this world. Our focus and discussions have always been about FAMILY and what being a strong family is worth. Not on what kind of home to buy or cars to buy. This is what we truly want our family happiness together to be built upon. My girls adore her and my family welcomes Karolina into the family. As her family has welcomed me. I'm not looking for a maid or someone to wait on us hand and foot. I know how to keep my home in order, clean, and being a Filipino man, I can cook my a$$ off! It comes very natural. I've been doing it most of my life on my own. You'd be surprised how clean my home is with 3 young ladies being here. Girls are not that clean! As us men are sometimes led to believe. But that's the short of why I wanted an immigrant wife. I wanted someone who would truly appreciate me for the man as I can appreciate her being a woman. And NOT, what I can give to her on the financial side of things or feel compelled by society that she has to compete with me in any way whatsoever.

Edited May 6, 2007 by altimixdj

[KarenCee 3]

I don't like 95% of the American woman and how society has taught that embracing being feminine is a weakness. And it has basically been throw away with materialism being replaced as more of a moral value. Too many women I've observed, have adapted the attitudes, physical, and personality characteristics that are too masuline for my taste. It's not attractive to me. I love women and all they were truly blessed being born as a true woman.

Just wanted to touch on this particular part...and yes I did read your whole post. I am very proud to say I am in the 5% (in your opinion) of the women who don't embrace the things you mentioned. I am not materialistic, nor do I try to "look like a man". I have morals, and I value being feminine. I think it's a bit unfair to lump all American women into the category that you have. I would hazard a guess that maybe 95% of the women from YOUR experience would be more accurate? My mother raised me to be a lady and I have done my mother proud. However, I do take up for myself and I don't let anyone run all over me. That doesn't in any way diminish one's femininity.

On the other hand, I could lump all men in the same category as my ex. However, that wouldn't be fair because I am sure there are some very decent and loving American men in this country. There is nothing at all wrong with having a spouse from a foreign country. My husband is foreign. I didn't purposely go looking for a foreign spouse...it just happened. It's sad that you (and many others on this message board) have had to go through some tough times...tis only my opinion that one shouldn't lump all into a category based on one's personal experiences.

[Scott & Lai 12]

I don't mind joining in on this debate. It will more than likely piss some people off. But hey, it's not your life and just text on a computer screen. What brought me to the decision of choosing to want an immigrant wife, was plain and simple. After being married for 11 years, I went on enough dates after the divorce which each date felt more like an interview for a home loan. My finances were none of their business to inquire about on a first date. I don't like 95% of the American woman and how society has taught that embracing being feminine is a weakness. And it has basically been throw away with materialism being replaced as more of a moral value. Too many women I've observed, have adapted the attitudes, physical, and personality characteristics that are too masuline for my taste. It's not attractive to me. I love women and all they were truly blessed being born as a true woman. Not trying to morph into men. Now, don't think that I have no respect for women. I'm a single father with 3 daughters. But also, I am an admirer of beauty in the opposite sex. I'm honest and I will tell you that I don't see that much here. At least where I live. Most women I encounter don't deny that they seek a man with the looks of Brad Pitt and the wealth of Bill Gates. I do fine financially taking care of my girls and myself and I'm well within my BMI (Body Mass Index). Obviously, I don't have the face of a movie star. And I'm fine with that. It's not a problem. But the qualities of my moral fiber are not important to those who are looking for a good man to share their life. So, I decided to look elsewhere outside the USA. Ukraine is where I ended up. I love seeing women who treasure being a woman in every way and don't feel as though they have to compete with a man to prove some kind of point. I never impressed my fiancee' with any of my financial information. Which she's NEVER asked me about my income, credit score, or the material possessions I have in this world. Our focus and discussions have always been about FAMILY and what being a strong family is worth. Not on what kind of home to buy or cars to buy. This is what we truly want our family happiness together to be built upon. My girls adore her and my family welcomes Karolina into the family. As her family has welcomed me. I'm not looking for a maid or someone to wait on us hand and foot. I know how to keep my home in order, clean, and being a Filipino man, I can cook my a$$ off! It comes very natural. I've been doing it most of my life on my own. You'd be surprised how clean my home is with 3 young ladies being here. Girls are not that clean! As us men are sometimes led to believe. But that's the short of why I wanted an immigrant wife. I wanted someone who would truly appreciate me for the man as I can appreciate her being a woman. And NOT, what I can give to her on the financial side of things or feel compelled by society that she has to compete with me in any way whatsoever.

[one...two...tree 2,762]

I was in class last week discussing political views on our immigration system here in the U.S., with men and women petitioning relatives especially fiancees to enter the U.S. Some of the outspoken opinions were very mannerable and calm, while majority of the others were choatic and harsh. For example, one woman stated that, "men should not be able to bring a woman in from another country because all they want is slaves, the 60's and 50's are long gone!" So to get our mines off our fiancees for a little bit if we can, lol, I welcome your insight on this particular view?

Thanks,

Austin

We (the US) already enjoy the benefits of Third World slave labor, so it's just natural that like slave owners from before, we want a little love slave for ourselves.

[Alex+R 0]

Oh Jesus not this thread again.