Ever Wonder Bit....

[KevandKiki2 0]

My mom sent me this....good for a laugh

Best,

Kev

EVER WONDER????

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why women can't put on mascara with their

mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do

"practice"?

Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on

"Start"?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and

dishwashing

liquid is made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money

called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest

traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on

airplanes?

Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck

together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of

progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the

terminal?

~~~~

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."

(and

that would be how??...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion:

Defrost."

(but, it's "just" a suggestion.)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on

bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late,

huh!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after

heating." (...and you thought????...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on

body."

(but wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:"Do not drive a car or

operate

machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to

reduce

the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those

5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and...

I'm

taking this because???....)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor

use

only." (as opposed to...what?)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about

a news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:

"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe,

uh...fly Delta?)

On a Swedish chainsaw:"Do not attempt to stop chain with your

hands or genitals." (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to

repost this message for others to read

Edited January 31, 2006 by KevandKiki2

[j&js 0]

Haha those are great

[Jasman0717 8]

[sntoria 0]

[KevandKiki2 0]

Glad ya like em..