Dealing with the stress of waiting

[Sapphirewng 7]

Hello! My fiance and I mailed our I-129 on March 19, 2012, and we recieved our NOA1 on March 22, 2012. It is now August 13, 2012. The waiting is becoming more and more difficult. We are both very stressed. Our days are spent online together, talking on Yahoo Messenger through voice call and webcams. We even sleep with our headphones and webcams on. We both feel as though our lives have been put on hold while we wait. I live in the United States, and he lives in Romania. I visited him last year in late February, and we haven't been together since then. We miss each other terribly. We are both having trouble staying positive and upbeat because of the long wait. I was wondering if anyone has any advice on how to deal with the stress.I know we both need to get out and do things instead of sitting at our computers all day, but it's so hard for us to be away from each other. He lives alone and the loneliness is very hard for him. I have 3 sons with me, ages 16, 18, and 20. So I am not completely alone like he is, but I feel bad if I go somewhere and leave him by himself. Ny advice on how we can get through this with our sanity intact would be greatly appreciated.

[CantWait2012 11]

Hello! My fiance and I mailed our I-129 on March 19, 2012, and we recieved our NOA1 on March 22, 2012. It is now August 13, 2012. The waiting is becoming more and more difficult. We are both very stressed. Our days are spent online together, talking on Yahoo Messenger through voice call and webcams. We even sleep with our headphones and webcams on. We both feel as though our lives have been put on hold while we wait. I live in the United States, and he lives in Romania. I visited him last year in late February, and we haven't been together since then. We miss each other terribly. We are both having trouble staying positive and upbeat because of the long wait. I was wondering if anyone has any advice on how to deal with the stress.I know we both need to get out and do things instead of sitting at our computers all day, but it's so hard for us to be away from each other. He lives alone and the loneliness is very hard for him. I have 3 sons with me, ages 16, 18, and 20. So I am not completely alone like he is, but I feel bad if I go somewhere and leave him by himself. Ny advice on how we can get through this with our sanity intact would be greatly appreciated.

Wow, you sound like my clone. HAHAHA I am US, my fiance is Romania, and I havent seen him since March. I did get my NOA2 recently though, but I can tell you I know EXACTLY what you are going through. "Life in Limbo" is what I call it. It really sucks. Getting out and about and still living life is the best advice I can give you. I have gone through phases of sitting at home on the pc all day and then phases of us both getting out (but still talking twice daily). It is much more enjoyable to get out and live life and come home and be happy to see eachother instead of the hours of staring and wishing you could spend the day together. "Preoccupation" with other things is the best soul food for this situation I have found...and a little faith and hope mixed in as well of course. Hugs for you, I know it is hard, and noone but us on this site know what it's truly like. I know that for sure!

[Sapphirewng 7]

Wow, you sound like my clone. HAHAHA I am US, my fiance is Romania, and I havent seen him since March. I did get my NOA2 recently though, but I can tell you I know EXACTLY what you are going through. "Life in Limbo" is what I call it. It really sucks. Getting out and about and still living life is the best advice I can give you. I have gone through phases of sitting at home on the pc all day and then phases of us both getting out (but still talking twice daily). It is much more enjoyable to get out and live life and come home and be happy to see eachother instead of the hours of staring and wishing you could spend the day together. "Preoccupation" with other things is the best soul food for this situation I have found...and a little faith and hope mixed in as well of course. Hugs for you, I know it is hard, and noone but us on this site know what it's truly like. I know that for sure!

Thank you so much for your comment! I know there are many more that are going through the same thing. You're right about noone knowing what it's like except those of us that are going through it. Maybe Mircea and I can come up with some ideas of things we can do to get our minds off of this for awhile. Congratulations on your NOA2! That's GREAT news! I wish you much happiness together!

[-=Mai and Timmy=- 12]

waiting must be bad if youre really craving or excited for something but remember guys we are going to wait in order for us to be together happily and if we notice waiting is worth it We are maybe in the stage of waiting bvut we have to remmeber that after this with all God help,We will be in good hands and offcourse to our love of our life!!

[Sapphirewng 7]

waiting must be bad if youre really craving or excited for something but remember guys we are going to wait in order for us to be together happily and if we notice waiting is worth it We are maybe in the stage of waiting bvut we have to remmeber that after this with all God help,We will be in good hands and offcourse to our love of our life!!

Yes! You're right! The wait will definitely be worth it!

[CantWait2012 11]

Thank you so much for your comment! I know there are many more that are going through the same thing. You're right about noone knowing what it's like except those of us that are going through it. Maybe Mircea and I can come up with some ideas of things we can do to get our minds off of this for awhile. Congratulations on your NOA2! That's GREAT news! I wish you much happiness together!

Yes, in my situation I have one son, but 50% custody so I am the one who is often alone more than my fiance. My fiance lives with family and is contantly out and about doing things for the family business, etc. So, I had to make an effort (like your Mircea will) to get myself out of the house and do something. The waiting might be killing us inside, but the previous poster is correct, it's all worth it. I wouldnt trade any one of the days in the last 2 years without him for anything in the world, however, staying on the pc all day wishing things were different often made me more sad, and certainly didnt change anything. However, it's funny but as soon as I started to get out more and do things, the process went faster, waiting got a little easier and then when I wasnt expecting it one night I got the text for the NOA2. I hope your NOA2 comes fast, best wishes for you both as well

[sk8rpatty 17]

Yep, get out, get some fresh air, get some exercise! It makes all the difference in the world. Both my fiance and I run. We try to challenge each other on how many miles we're running.

If you're out doing things you will have more to talk to each other about. If I wasn't so busy right now, I'd be going crazy too.

Hang in there!

[JensJrny2Ray 367]

Sometimes I get caught up with sitting at home and on my computer all day because I miss my fiance, but the truth is...it's so important to get out there and live life while you wait. It's important physically and mentally! You can take this time of waiting to get other things in order in your life or go out and do things so that you have more stories to tell him when you get back home! The same goes for him as well!

Take care, and best wishes

[Sapphirewng 7]

Sometimes I get caught up with sitting at home and on my computer all day because I miss my fiance, but the truth is...it's so important to get out there and live life while you wait. It's important physically and mentally! You can take this time of waiting to get other things in order in your life or go out and do things so that you have more stories to tell him when you get back home! The same goes for him as well!

Take care, and best wishes

Thank you! I need to work on that. There's so much I need to be doing. I find that I'm neglecting things that I should be doing just because I don't want to be away from him. He tells me all the time that he doesn't want to keep me away from what I need to do. And I know he doesn't. It's just me. I miss him when I'm not talking to him and I know he misses me. It's just a very difficult way to live. We both know we aren't the only ones struggling with this problem, and it helps me so much to hear from others that are dealing with the same thing. I really appreciate all the comments. I pray that this "visa journey" will be over soon for all of us, and that we'll be with the one we love.

[Sapphirewng 7]

Yes, in my situation I have one son, but 50% custody so I am the one who is often alone more than my fiance. My fiance lives with family and is contantly out and about doing things for the family business, etc. So, I had to make an effort (like your Mircea will) to get myself out of the house and do something. The waiting might be killing us inside, but the previous poster is correct, it's all worth it. I wouldnt trade any one of the days in the last 2 years without him for anything in the world, however, staying on the pc all day wishing things were different often made me more sad, and certainly didnt change anything. However, it's funny but as soon as I started to get out more and do things, the process went faster, waiting got a little easier and then when I wasnt expecting it one night I got the text for the NOA2. I hope your NOA2 comes fast, best wishes for you both as well

Your reply made me feel much better. Thank you. It's so very hard. And all we can do is wait. But sitting here wishing to be together is very depressing for both of us. We definitely need to find things to do while we wait. Sometimes it feels like getting this visa approved and getting married is just a dream. We both keep holding on to hope. I try to keep the negative thoughts away. He's so helpful to me in remaining positive most of the time. Idk what I would do without him.